The three of them went to see Fu Bing again, she was still asleep and looked very weak. However, listening to Chen Xue, Fu Bing has slowly begun to recover his spirit in the past two days, which is good news.

Coming back from the hospital, Huo Yi carried Xue Mianmian, first sent Lu Weibei home, then went back to pick up Qin Li, and then sent the couple home. has been so busy for a while, and by the time Huo Yi got home, it was already time for the lights to come on.

Huo Yi warmed up the rice and chicken in the refrigerator, blanched a little vegetables, poured soy sauce and mixed them.

Distraught, I can't even eat a meal. I am usually used to eating, but today I actually feel tasteless, and I feel stiff and stiff in my stomach, and I feel uncomfortable.

He ate two more bites, but he still couldn't eat it, hesitated for a moment, simply put down his chopsticks, and went to the storage room.

He dug out the letter Fu Yin had left for him.

Well, resentment or guilt, let's end it tonight.

opened the letter, and Fu Yin's words popped out crookedly.

Her words have always been unsightly, and she says them like her people, and she is really right. Her crooked words really fit in well with her bouncing appearance.

"Brother:

I have to go.

Please forgive me for leaving your parents in your care.

One more thing, please forgive me as well.

I know you've always wanted to save me, even after studying medicine so hard. But I can't wait for you.

I'm sorry, but I never told you, but I've been preparing to leave early.

I wish that the progress of medicine would be faster than the progress of my disease, so that I would never have to think about whether I should give up or not, and that I could keep fighting, and even if I lost in the end, I could leave some data for the development of medicine.

But it's slower than my illness.

Two days ago, I noticed that I couldn't hold my chopsticks. I know that this is not a good sign, and it proves that I am getting worse and worse, and I have less and less hope for a new drug, and the time left for me to make a choice is getting shorter and shorter. If I lose my hands, I won't be able to continue my plan.

So I made this decision.

But I'm not a deserter.

Brother, I guess my parents will be very sad, they will not understand me very much, and they will even blame me and hate me. But I think you should understand me. When the time comes, please persuade them and tell them that I am not a deserter or a coward, and that I have not failed their education in me and have not become a person without responsibility.

I took this decision seriously.

I know my future.

In the beginning, I would be like a plant, lying in bed, but that was nothing.

Actually, I have a lot of things to do.

I can listen to audiobooks, listen to the radio, watch TV, and I can also watch the clouds in the sky, and staring at the little mango. By the way, you don't know, Little Mango is the name I gave to Aunt Liu's orange cat in the next unit, and it often comes to me through the window during the day.

I still like to talk to you, and what you tell me, it's like I've seen it with my own eyes. Sometimes, you have a lot of ideas and need me to help you get back on track. A patient like me, who walks by the side of death every day, naturally has many things better than you think.

There are many disadvantages in this kind of life, but there are not so many disadvantages.

The next thing was a little scary, and I would slowly lose my ability to speak.

I can still listen to books, to listen to the radio, to watch TV, to watch the clouds in the sky, and to listen to the stories you tell me.

But I can't meow at the little mango, and I can't talk to you anymore.

I may not be bored, but I should be suffocating. You know, my personality is very noisy, if you don't let me do it, forget it, if I don't even let my mouth move, I may really go crazy.

I also used to wonder if I could not respond to you anything, would you be disappointed, would you not despair.

But my mom told me that no matter what happened, she would love me and be content because of my presence.

Even if I only have one breath left.

To be honest, I think my mom is a little bit idealistic and seriously underestimates the difficulties ahead. But I also have to admit that some love due to blood is really not so easy to explain with theory.

I'm worried that this kind of self is torture for you, but if not, I'm willing to live a little longer.

After all, the clouds in the sky are the best painters, the belly of the little mango is the warmest pillow, and your life is the best story.

But time doesn't stop, does it?

I'm going to have problems with my respiratory system and I'm going to need a ventilator. This machine will torment each and every one of us with noise day and night, reminding us of the fact that I am about to leave.

Then, it will infect me, make me weak, and leave none of my organs in my body good.

It will take me and leave nothing behind.

But I don't want to leave nothing behind.

I think that in order to live, people have to do something meaningful to society, and this is not in vain. If I just die so aggrieved and leave nothing, what's the difference between that and never coming?

I thought about it for a long time, and I realized that I didn't finish high school, and it was already difficult to leave something for this society with knowledge, I was not an artistic genius, and it was too difficult to leave a painting, a song, or something, and I was depressed for a while, and I felt that I really had no use.

Until one day, I listened to the news and heard that there are very few people donating organs in China, and there are many patients waiting for transplants.

I suddenly knew what I could leave behind.

I'm the one who no longer has hope, but they still have.

Brother, I know you must understand me. You're a medical student and you should know the importance of organ donation better than I do.

My dad is also a sensible person, so there shouldn't be any major problems. But my mother may not be able to accept it, she will cry a lot, and at that time, she will have to rely on your help to persuade her.

I'm the way I am now, living one more day, one less day, and that's it. After all, we all have to say goodbye, what is the difference between one day earlier and one day later?

What's more, a day later, the more torture I bring them. I would have preferred that I would have remained in their hearts as healthy and bouncing, rather than weak, swollen and scrawny, like a fish lying on a board.

To put it mildly, I can't be considered a complete departure. By that day, although I will be gone, my eyes will still be looking, my heart will still be beating, and my lungs will still be breathing.

I don't know if this thought will give you some comfort, but I hope you find it.

I hope that when you think of me in the future, you will say, Yin Yin, she is a little unlucky, and she has a disease that cannot be cured. But she was very brave, she donated her organs, saved many people, many families. And she is very beautiful, white and clean, slim.

If there is fate, you may meet my eyes and my heart in the future.

If only at that time, you could praise me with "Yinyin, well done".

Brother, I've troubled you too much in this life, I'm sorry. But I didn't mean to get sick, so please be a big adult and bear with me a little more. In the next life, in the next life, I will be your brother, and I will protect you.

Fu Yin"

Huo Yi read to the end, and his hand holding the letter paper was shaking.

He never thought that Fu Yin would think so much.

He always thought that she was still a little sister who was not very sensible, innocent and straightforward. Unexpectedly, this illness turned her into such a mature person.

She actually thinks a lot more than he thinks.

She also has a lot more love for the world than he thinks.

He had always complained about her, thinking that she was a coward, that it was her escape that had caused him to be alone now.

But she's a hero.

She did not leave with fear, but with hope.

But he complained about her for thirteen years.

She thought she could understand her brother best, she thought she must be able to understand her brother, and complained about her for thirteen years!

Huo Yi is an atheist, but Rao is like this, and he is also a spirit in his heart.

If there is a spirit under Fu Yinquan......

If there is a spirit under her!

When she saw that four old people had died because of her, and that her only surviving relatives regarded her as an enemy and a plague, how should she deal with herself?

She's just miscalculated, she's just miscalculated......

For so many years, he had never dreamed of Fu Yin. Did she not fall into his dreams because she blamed him, or because she felt guilty?

He thought of Lu Weibei's serious face again.

In addition to other people's treatment plans and life events, Lu Weibei is a person who rarely expresses her own opinions, but she defends Fu Yin so calmly, and says word by word that the person who donates organs is very great.

She also knew that Fu Yin was a brave and smart little girl, but her luck was particularly bad, right?

As for him, he watched Fu Yin grow up, watched her jump to the supermarket to buy bread, and then respectfully handed it to the beggar on the street, watched her stand up for the same table and fight with the big children who blocked the street to rob her nose and face, and watched her twist her foot when she participated in the cross-country run, and also limped to the finish line with her teeth gritted.

He has always known that Fu Yin is brave, strong, and warm, and he has always known it.

But he was so sad and scared. So he chose not to understand her, chose to hate her, so that he could sleep peacefully.

It turned out that for so many years, it was not that she was sorry for him, but that he was sorry for her.

"Yinyin, you did a great job. I'm sorry, but I was cowardly. Huo Yi muttered.

This is Huo Yi's first real good sleep in thirteen years.

He didn't rely on melatonin to help him sleep, nor did he meet the bloody faces of his relatives in his dreams.

In the dream, he was sitting on a lawn full of dandelions.

Fu Yin was sitting cross-legged not far away, grimacing with the orange cat in her arms and staring at her.

Between the eyes of a person and a cat, Fu Yin looked up at him and smiled at him.

"Yin Yin......" he struggled to speak.

Fu Yin didn't seem to know his resentment over the years, and said with a smile, "Brother, you're a lot older." ”

“…… You're still the same as you were back then. ”

"I'm sorry about my parents. Fu Yin said.

“…… Are they alright?"

"It should be good now, four people came up and scolded me. Fu Yin stuck out her tongue, "They have already left first, but put down the words, I have to clean up the sins I have done, and let me keep guarding you until you forgive me." ”

"I'm sorry, I've been misunderstanding you. Huo Yi smiled bitterly.

Fu Yin shook her head, "It's because I'm not thoughtful that I make everyone so miserable." My parents have already told me that there are things that should not be decided by myself, and should be discussed with them first. They also need to be well prepared. ”

She laughed instead, "Brother, since it's all said, I'll go." Don't embarrass us!"

“…… Good. ”

"This time, I'll go first, and in the next life, I will be your brother, so that you can take back all the revenge in this life. Fu Yin said chicly.

Huo Yi was a little red-faced.

He thought about it and felt that the final goodbye still had to be sincere. So he made up his mind, "...... Yin Yin, our age difference may have to be next generation. ”

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