Tolerance and MemoryZhang Baotong 2016.11.18

Since birth, our minds have been collecting and preserving all kinds of information and subtle episodes that we have heard, seen, and felt. Pen Fun Pavilion wWw. ｂiquge。 infoWe don't just have memories in our brains, but also the billions of cells in our bodies. For example, after seeing something, even if we close our eyes, there will still be an image of the thing in our pupils. There is also the fact that our skin has been irritated by a certain substance, and when we see that substance again, the skin will have a conditioned reflex and feel itchy or painful.

At the beginning of man, he was not deeply involved in the world, and he could be described as pure and flawless. However, when we grow up, we will become complicated by our life experiences and feelings. When we were children, we were often blocked, blamed, and scolded by our parents and others. These situations are memorized by our brain and body, and produce a variety of consciousness and feelings, forming our own concepts of right and wrong and subjective state of mind.

In all our memories, the awareness of guilt, anger, and prejudice is extremely harmful and the most harmful substance that affects our state of mind. Some memories can even affect us for the rest of our lives. Guilt is the feeling of having done something that you can't do with someone else, or that you feel regretful and upset. One of the things I feel most guilty about in my life is that I once asked a classmate who lives in a suburban county of Xi'an to help me find out when the Xi'an Railway Bureau will start recruiting workers. Because at that time I was still in the countryside of Hunan. Although he didn't help, he did his best for me, but after I came to Xi'an, because he lived in a suburban county and it was inconvenient to meet, I didn't go to thank him for a long time. However, after a long time, I felt embarrassed to see people again. Therefore, I have not been in contact with anyone for decades.

Naturally, there are some things that make me angry, among them, when I worked in the education department of the Railway Bureau, I worked hard and achieved remarkable results, but because I could not give money and gifts, I was left aside in two cadre adjustments, and this incident still makes me angry and angry.

The impact of prejudice on a person is also very large. My wife told me that when she was young, there were several Shaanxi people who chased her, but she resolutely refused to look for Shaanxi people. No matter how capable they are and how good they are to her, she resolutely refuses to find people from Shaanxi. The reason is that when she was in the third grade of primary school, it was the ************ period, and the family did not have enough food to eat, so she often dug camelinates in the suburban countryside next to the ruins of Daming Palace in Xi'an. Once, she saw a little girl in the city who was chased by a strong peasant man holding a large palladium and yelling because she was pulling a radish in a farmer's field. The girl was frightened and ran away as hard as she could, but when she was chased to the edge of the reservoir, there was no way out, so she jumped into the reservoir. By the time someone came to help, the girl had already drowned, and the water she drank stretched her stomach up. This impression made his wife remember deeply, and it also made her prejudiced against Shaanxi people.

Indeed, our physical and mental memories strongly influence our emotions. Interestingly, we can create and store emotions, and we can release them in the same way that we release energy. But if I can't deal with our emotions properly and suppress them for a long time, it is easy for them to burst out violently, causing some calamities.

For example, in a middle school in our district, because a rich child often made fun of and bullied a poor child, once, the poor child's child couldn't bear it anymore, so he stabbed the classmate with a fruit knife more than ten times, causing serious injuries and kidney damage to the rich child. And the cause of this incident is clearly biased. Because there is a certain prejudice between rich children and poor children. The American social psychologist Aronson defines prejudice as "the hostile or negative attitude of people towards a particular group of people generalized on the basis of false and incomplete information." "Prejudice is not only a source of arrogance, but also a significant source of anger.

And for our hearts, the feeling of guilt is also very devastating. It often makes us feel guilty, ashamed, and feel like we owe someone a lifetime of debt that we will never be able to pay off. This feeling not only makes us upset, but also depletes our potential, interferes with us, prevents us from cheering up and forging ahead, and is an obstacle and a hindrance to our success. If we don't exclude them, it's hard for us to concentrate on our work and succeed.

Unfortunately for us, the feeling of guilt often hides in our hearts for a lifetime, weighing on us like a burden. Things we can get and things we don't get at all, things we can't have, and conflicts and disputes caused by prejudices can fill our hearts with feelings of guilt and anger. The guilt and anger will accumulate so much that each of us can fill a sack.

In fact, the more mature a person is, the more problems he thinks about and the more troubles he has. The deeper your biases, the more complex the contradictions you encounter and the more anger you will arouse. So, we have to investigate and question how these feelings of guilt and anger are constantly accumulating and generated. We should even know how to lift the weight that is weighing on our shoulders.

First, we should understand that the guilt and anger that cling to us are neither released nor valued, but are slowly accumulated. We need to find a way to release and deal with these feelings of guilt and anger without expecting it to go away automatically.

To release and dispose of them, one must give oneself a channel to dissipate. In this way, we can gradually dissolve this emotion. Drug use and alcohol use only make our condition worse. Because it can only be a temporary comfort. And what we need is to take the whole burden off. Fortunately, we are born with the ability to process feelings and emotions. Of all natural remedies, forgiveness and forgiveness are the best ways.

We need to learn to comfort ourselves, and forgiving ourselves is the best way to comfort ourselves. At the same time, we should also learn to forgive and tolerate others. When we learn to forgive ourselves, we will naturally forgive and tolerate others.

In short, the longer we carry emotional baggage, the more harmful it is to us. Forgiveness and forgiveness allow us to let go of the emotional baggage that has been pent up for years, and from the moment we begin to forgive and forgive, we will feel wide and refreshed. And the most joyful thing is that we are already energetic and optimistic at this time. (To be continued.) )