Cheating Zhang Baotong 2018.8.2

If you're working or traveling a lot, you're probably most worried about your wife's cheating. Although this worry is worrying, it is also helpless. There are many reasons for a woman's cheating, including emotional discord, self-indulgence, loneliness, emotional desire, liking the new and hating the old, being tempted, as well as psychological and physiological, objective and subjective and many other factors. In today's society, the red dust is rolling, there are many temptations, and people's psychology and mentality are very lonely and fragile, if there is no firm belief and loyal integrity, it is easy to go out of the wall, emotional derailment.

The most important reason for a woman's emotional derailment is the seduction and confusion of men. From a biological point of view, male animals occupy female resources, and ancient emperors set up three palaces and six courtyards. It shows that a man's possession of a woman is by no means limited to monogamy, but that the more the merrier. If a man's power is unlimited, I'm afraid no amount of women will satisfy him. We can see that under certain conditions, rich people can marry dozens, or even hundreds, and some corrupt officials have dozens or hundreds of mistresses. Even ordinary people have at least a few or dozens of derailments in their lives.

Men often lack mutual communication because of the disharmony of their husband and wife, and over time, the relationship will fade, and if there is a woman around him who makes him excited, it is easy to cheat. No matter how beautiful a woman is, she will get old, and as soon as she gets old, her appearance and figure will change, and at this time, men will be easily attracted to young and beautiful women, which will lead to cheating. But more cheating is due to the discord and quarrels between the husband and wife, which will make the man feel upset, feel that he is not happy at all with a woman, and want to seek happiness and comfort outside of marriage. According to a professional report, an average man will have sex with at least 20 to 40 women in his lifetime. These facts and statistics show that men tend to take the initiative when it comes to emotional cheating, starting with the disloyal and unchaste party. At the same time, it also shows that it is the active cheating of men that leads to the cheating of many women. Moreover, because men's cheating, as well as men's snubbing and contempt for women, are major inducements for women's cheating.

In male-dominated societies, men tend to occupy many resources, such as power, money, fame and wealth, and even power and violence. As a woman on the weaker side, she will submit to or submit to men's coercion and inducement for the sake of livelihood, money, promotion, security, etc. Of course, in today's society, women's emotional derailment is more voluntary, and more of a power or money transaction.

It is strange that although men are the active parties of the cheating of the relationship between men and women, men will not be more serious than women in terms of reputation damage. Even if a man cheats or plays with a woman, the man still has a sense of righteousness, while the woman on the victim suffers from both physical and reputational humiliation. It seems that men are only truly humiliated when they lose in their careers, and emotional derailment is just a small loss of face and shame for them.

Therefore, in ancient and modern times, people at home and abroad regard men's infidelity as a kind of romance, a manifestation of men's natural lust and poor control. But a woman's cheating is much more serious. For thousands of years, a woman's cheating has been convicted of a felony, and it is a major event like a catastrophe. In ancient times, there were special torture instruments to punish women for cheating, and there were also criminal laws specifically for women cheating, which were very cruel. A woman's infidelity often leads to homicide and wounding incidents. Therefore, in the martial arts, there are plot stories of killing adulterers and killing adulteresses. Including in "Water Margin", how many heroes were forced to Liangshan because of this kind of thing.

A man can kill an adulterer and an adulteress with confidence, and he can marry three wives and six concubines at will, while a woman must strictly abide by women's morals and cannot cheat. Although this brutality and inequality are a thing of the past, women's infidelity is still regarded as an intolerable event by men. A peasant woman I knew was smashed on her little foot with a bench by a man because she was sitting closer to her former lover, and she couldn't walk normally for two months. Another friend has been in love with his girlfriend for three years, but after hearing that his girlfriend was close to another man, he broke up with his girlfriend without saying anything. There is also a young man who heard that his girlfriend had lived with another man on the wedding night, and immediately filed for divorce from the bride. Although his girlfriend revealed that he had also lived with his ex-girlfriend, he felt that he was a man and did not suffer a loss by sleeping with other women, but his own woman had been slept with by other men, which made him unacceptable.

This kind of thinking that women who can sleep with others, but can't tolerate their own women being slept with by others, is a common mentality of almost all men. However, if a woman does not let other men sleep, the initiative is not in the hands of men, but in the hands of women themselves. Due to the progress of society and the change of attitudes, those criminal laws and torture instruments that specifically target and punish women for cheating have long been abolished, and women have the same rights as men. Therefore, women's cheating is no longer regarded as a scourge and disaster like the collapse of the sky as in the past. In particular, the separation of husband and wife in two places has exacerbated the emotional derailment of women. A colleague of mine in the past, in his 40s, has been working in the field, and the relationship between husband and wife is not good, so for more than ten years, he has been maintaining a lover relationship with a colleague in the unit. There is also a colleague who teaches at the teaching point of a small station along the railway, and in order to be transferred to Xi'an, he got in touch with a section chief and became a secret lover. After that, the section chief specially transferred her to his own department. I also know a young girl who has just been married and often goes out with the boss of the company, because the boss not only takes care of her at work, but also pays her monthly phone bill and reimburses some expenses. Opposite our residential community is the largest Daming Palace building materials market in the northwest region, where there are thousands of large and small bosses, which one is not overtly or secretly supporting lovers and working girls?

And women who go to the city to work, cheating is more common. A friend of mine is in charge of cleaning in the company and often hires some cleaning women. They let the young and beautiful female workers be responsible for the cleaning work of the company leaders, and let the ordinary-looking female workers be responsible for the cleaning of the floors. After a long time, I found that those young and beautiful female workers were often secretly taken by a certain leader to eat and open a house. And those ordinary-looking female workers became lovers with the company's single security guards and employees. Among them, a nearly 40-year-old female worker from Gansu and a middle-aged employee from Sichuan have almost become a temporary couple, and the two have maintained a lover relationship for more than ten years.

Not only are women who go to the city to work easy to cheat, but even women who stay in the countryside are also easy to cheat. I used to travel to the mountainous areas of southern Shaanxi, and I often stayed at an acquaintance's house for a few days, and I also knew a little about the cheating of women in the countryside. Although women are still very serious in the countryside, it is not uncommon for women to cheat, but they are afraid of being discovered and ruin their reputation, because the village is full of relatives and acquaintances. I once witnessed an incident of a woman cheating. There was a woman who married Danfeng from Shanyang, in her early 30s, pretty, and a middle-aged man who opened a shop by the mountain pass. After a long time, my husband knew about them. My husband ran back from Xi'an, took someone to the man's house, and asked the man to pay 2,000 yuan in compensation. But the man said that he couldn't come up with 2,000 yuan, so he finally took out 200 yuan and invited everyone to have a meal, so that the matter could be calmed down. There are also young girls who live in men's homes before they get married. It's not unlike the kind of unmarried cohabitation that young people in the city have.

In fact, men will see a woman's cheating as a great thing, but women will see their cheating as a romantic and exciting experience. I have heard many times from women about their experiences of cheating, one of them telling how she was loved and cared for by a unit leader, who made her do the lightest work, get the most money, and take her to the hotel once a week to play. One told me about living with a student at the teacher college for half a year. Another told about a time when she was in sincere love with a company commander of the Construction Corps in Xinjiang. These secrets are shared only with the strangers they trust most, not with their closest acquaintances. From their relishful and obsessive tones, I feel that they are treating these experiences as precious and beautiful memories of their lives.

From this, we can conclude that the woman's red apricot out of the wall and emotional derailment are not out of impulse and out of control, but out of desire and yearning. Women are sensual animals, and they are often fascinated by romantic and beautiful feelings, sometimes they want to enjoy the romantic stimulation from cheating, find the feeling of first love, or are infatuated with a man, want to please a man, or are dissatisfied with the reality of marriage and love, and want to fill the loneliness and frustration in their hearts by cheating. In addition, there is a lack of emotional communication with the spouse, a unsatisfactory sex life, or out of revenge, or even a desire to end the love and marriage relationship. In short, every derailment will have a reason for them to be relieved.