The little girl was lying on a large, firm wooden bed, playing with the net that her grandmother had placed her things on.

"Why don't you go to bed soon?" the old woman turned over, took the net from the little girl's hand, and patted her on the chest.

"I can't sleep. The little girl muttered.

"Otherwise, grandma will sing to you. The sleepy old woman patted the little girl like this, singing some children's rhymes with fragmentary lyrics, and a few old songs that were all too familiar.

Whether it is a nap or a night, the little girl often falls asleep to the old woman's singing.

Sometimes, in order to get rid of the bad habit of sucking the child's fingers, the old woman deliberately smeared the little girl's fingers with medicines such as chili pepper and panacea, and even joined forces with the little girl's uncles to tie up the little girl's hands while she slept......

The little girl is the only granddaughter in her generation, and her grandmother and uncles are very pampered and indulgent, even if she is a picky eater, her grandmother always cooperates with some food that the little girl is willing to eat, such as the only vegetable she is willing to eat - stir-fried cabbage with goose fat, or fried poached eggs.

Even the grandfather, who rarely smiled, would point to the room in the small hotel with a straight face and say: "If you obediently help grandma fold towels and collect quilts and bed sheets in the guest room, grandpa will let you buy roast chicken thighs once a week to eat." ”

In fact, the little girl revolves around her grandmother every day, even if her grandfather doesn't open the conditions, she always accompanies her grandmother to do those daily tasks. After eating every day, I was afraid that the little girl would be hungry, so I would secretly stuff money to let her go to the grandmother's house next door to buy a bun or steamed bun.

The little girl likes her grandmother the most, she always loves to chirp next to her grandmother, grandma goes to exercise in the morning, she follows to the slide, grandma goes to a friend's house to play mahjong, she follows to watch TV, comics, grandma goes to travel with the group, ten times can also keep up with eight times.

In the face of grandpa who doesn't like to laugh and is strict, she doesn't dare to spill, and she doesn't dare to mess around, but she likes to secretly climb into her grandfather's bed when she takes a nap, and hide at her grandfather's feet to take a nap.

……

Looking at the fragmentary picture that was already too faint, the corners of Yeyue's mouth couldn't help but raise slightly, and tears appeared in her eyes.

It was the most reassuring day of her childhood.

……

The third year for parents to take home.

"Don't you understand what you can and can't say? You can say whatever your grandmother asks you, and you, you grab a rake! ”

When the woman returned home, her face was ugly, she exhaled a few slaps, and screamed uncontrollably with emotion.

The little girl shivered, huddled by the closet, tears kept falling from her frightened eyes, "I, I don't dare......" She didn't understand why her mother was so angry.

"If you cry, you will only cry, what do you have to cry?" Looking at the innocent expression of the little girl, the woman felt more angry.

"I can only cry, I will only cry, am I not good to you? Your grandmother doesn't want to take you, so she asks me to bring it back and bring it myself, do you know?" the woman shrieked.

……

The woman returned home with a tired face, and when she saw that the house was in a mess and her life was unsatisfactory, she suddenly exploded.

"Why are you so ignorant as a sister? Won't you take it away if the living room is so messy?"

The eleven or twelve-year-old girl replied with a stubborn and dissatisfied face: "I didn't mess with it." ”

"Anyway, you are the elder sister, the younger brother is not sensible, I am not at home, and when I see the mess at home, you will help tidy it up. ”

The two little boys followed the woman closely, and the eldest one complained unwillingly: "My sister still beat us." ”

Seeing that the two younger brothers were still falling into the trap at this time, the little girl raised her wrist, revealing a watch with a big crack, and her tone was slightly choked, "It was the two of them who beat me one and broke my watch." ”

However, the woman still insists that it is her fault, that the elder sister must let the younger brother, the younger brother will make a mess of the family, and as the elder sister, she must take responsibility for cleaning up the aftermath.

The girl who stubbornly refused to bow her head and admit her mistake was beaten a few times.

In the end, she pursed her lips and shed tears, silently cleaning up her ...... but he was crying in his heart.

One pinched her neck from behind and didn't even let her move, and the other beat her head-on, couldn't she fight back?

That watch was the only thing her mother bought for her, the most expensive thing, didn't she tell her that it was very expensive, and she had to take good care of it and not break it?

……

The younger brother, who was two years younger, with her brother who was three years younger than her, stood at the door of the room with an expression she couldn't understand, and said, "Mom actually still loves you." ”

The little girl looked at her two younger brothers who were blocking the door, and snorted disdainfully. Silent.

In my heart, I was full of self-deprecation and resentment.

In the past, if you wanted to remotely control the car, I would buy it for you, and I wanted a doll, so I let her smash it in the face with money and drive it out of the door...... If you don't have money, will a doll be more expensive than your remote-controlled car? I can buy five dolls with a remote-controlled car, and I only need one......

Why can I only watch you play? I can only watch other people play with dolls? Why?

Hurt me, do I use that expression and say to me, 'I hate you when I see you'?

It's okay, you hate me, and grandma likes me...... Grandma hurts me ....... The girl hid alone in a small dimly lit room, silently shedding tears.

……

"It's nothing, what are you arguing with him, what's the good thing about arguing like this? What kind of divorce, what kind of divorce is a little thing? What woman is not like this?" the mother's voice kept coming out of the microphone.

The woman held the microphone tightly, and the dissatisfaction in her heart became more and more intense, and finally she couldn't help but say what she wanted to say deep in her heart.

"Mom, do you know? I really feel like I'm going crazy...... I can't control ...... I ...... "She wished she could get her mother's relief."

However, on the other end of the phone, my mother's voice suddenly became cold, "Crazy, if you are really crazy, you will be crazy at his house, don't come back!"

It was the seventh year of her marriage, and no one wanted to listen to her, isolated by her husband. I can't go out to work, I have no friends, I can only take care of my children at home to help my husband work, and I use my sleep time to pick up my extra home to do it, but my husband will embezzle that meager salary in various names and reasons, and I have nowhere to go for years.

……

The woman who persuaded her daughter to go back was so angry that she smashed the hanger in her hand at her daughter.

"You are this kind of personality, no wonder people don't want you, your personality is so hard, is it useful? If you don't go back, just move out for me, don't come back!"

"It's enough for you to gamble for half a year, it's not a big deal for a man to play with a woman, just endure it and it will pass, can you see that this kind of thing in this world can be less? How many women have met, don't you just go back and tell him well, let him change it, isn't it good for the family to reunite? A child has no father, aren't you afraid that he will become a hooligan when he grows up?"

"What kind of eyes are you looking at? If you have the ability, you will move out!"

The woman who was smashed by the knot of the hanger was full of grievances that were difficult to export, and she could only have red eyes and tears.

"Listen to me, and go...... Do you want to go back?"

The woman who pursed her mouth tightly, under the pressure of her mother, finally spoke, "I don't want to go back...... I will move out with my son. ”

……

In the third year after the divorce with her youngest son, the relationship between the woman and her mother finally got better, and the woman's mother finally stopped thinking about it, a woman must have a man to be happy, and she wanted her to go back to her husband's house and have a good family reunion.

On that day, the woman chatted with her mother, and the atmosphere was unusually pleasant.

"You don't like to eat when you are young, a bowl of rice always has to be fed for a long time, let me take the bowl from home to the market and then feed it home to eat. ”

The woman listened to the funny story of her childhood, and she couldn't help but laugh.

"You are the only one in the family who is a woman, and your grandmother will take it with you when she goes out on a trip, and she got sick and went to the emergency room on the way back, so she let you come back with the car alone...... Your brother, and those cousins of the same age as you, should have never gone out with you, and now I love your little cousin more. ”

The woman squinted at her daughter, and suddenly said in some state of mind: "Actually, your grandmother, I don't really care for you, that is, because you looked cute when you were a child. ”

At that moment, her heart ...... It hurts, and the little world that hides a wisp of warmth collapses.

She even wondered if her mother was saying that she was actually ...... No one really likes it? Even if they did, it was only on the surface?

……

Looking at the pages faded away, but never forgotten, Yeyue couldn't help but smile bitterly.

Looking back on the past many years later, many of them are actually not a big deal, and if you look at it from a different angle, you can even experience it, but ......

She still can't forget her ...... Mother......