So, when I'm fine, I write nonsense, thinking that some words sound better than saying them, whether they make sense or not.

My adolescent love affair is full of ignorance, that kind of unknown commotion emotion, it seems to have started since the third year of junior high school, from a girl dreaming of me when she said to me, until a friend said that I was her dream lover, let me intuitively feel for the first time what kind of emotion is between men and women, the middle few years are ignorant, hazy, and finally Guan Wenbin helped me determine this feeling, it feels really good.

I also said to her with a weak heart: "This is almost the college entrance examination, we can't just do it so blatantly, right? I'm like this, if you are distracted by this matter and the college entrance examination fails, then I will be too guilty." ”

She said: "Don't worry, I'm familiar with falling in love, but I can't." ”

I said, "Just blow it." ”

She smiled and said, "I'll tell you a secret, I gave away my first kiss when I was in my second year of junior high school." ”

I said, "You're early enough." ”

She said: "It's early, I didn't understand anything at that time, I didn't feel anything after kissing, and then I said goodbye to my little boyfriend." ”

I said, "Why don't we try it?"

She said, "Who just said that you shouldn't affect the college entrance examination?"

At this point, Guan Wenhui and I began to stick together whenever we had time, mixed with the flow of people, and walked towards the sweet and bitter pit.

In early spring, the weather is still a little cold.

I always like to sit in the last row, one might even say obsessed. It seems like a VIP area, but few of the students in the last row are serious learners, at least me. I can ignore the teacher's nonsense, I can do the little actions I want to do, and the most important thing is that I feel that only that small corner of a huge classroom belongs to our private territory, just belongs to me and those who need it as eagerly as I do, and I feel natural and relaxed there. It seems that the teacher and we have reached a consensus that as long as we don't affect the other students, almost all the teachers will automatically block that little corner, and everything can be understood! As for the revision, it is completely the spontaneous behavior of the students, and the teacher basically does not care about us, mainly to do some tutoring and mobilization before the college entrance examination.

Since Guan Wenhui was sitting in the front row, the two of us often looked at each other from a distance, and we were thinking about each other all the time, and whenever she had the opportunity, she would run over in small steps and say some gossip to me that didn't hurt or itch. I'm more introverted, and basically every time I speak, she takes the initiative, which really embarrasses me.

There were high textbooks piled up on my desk, looking at "Gu Cheng's Poems", listening to Shui Mu Nianhua and Xu Wei, and now, with the company of Guan Wenbin, it instantly made me think of the possibility of a life in the future: to be a librarian, but it didn't take long for me to dispel this idea, thinking that it was okay to turn over the books once in a while, and if I were to be buried in the pile of books all day long, wouldn't it be like a dead body being buried in the loess? How frightening it is to announce the end of life before it has even begun, this way of life is not advisable.

But Guan Wenbin doesn't think so, she always wants to be tired of being with me, no matter where she is, even if I'm a librarian, maybe she doesn't know that after a long time, everything is getting farther and farther away from the original point.

Guan Wenhuan likes to laugh, no matter where or when, you can always see her light smiling face, as if all sad things have nothing to do with her, I am always inexplicably brought into it by her.

Before the last class in the afternoon, I was lying on my desk reading a book, and Guan Wenhui came over, leaned over, and said, "You stared at me without blinking." ”

I laughed and said, "Is it that obvious?"

She said, "Yes, you blink." ”

Then, I blinked.

She said, "Actually, you were just in a daze, saying, what are you thinking?"

I said, "Didn't think about anything?"

She continued, "If there's nothing to think about, just put me in your head and think about me." ”

I said, "How can you be such a big living person, I can only pretend a little bit, I can pretend to be part of it first, such as your prosperous beauty." ”

She said: "Yo, Chen Zhuo, you see, you have learned to be humorous with me. ”

I said, "Yes, the one who is close to ink is black!"

She hit me and said, "It's Zhu Zhechi." We both laughed,

She continued: "If you feel bored, chat with me more, I'm almost idle!"

I said, "It's time to be idle, I'm not bored, you see I'm working hard to prepare for the college entrance examination!"

"Don't be poor, wait for me after school, something!"

"What's the matter?"

"Good thing!"

"What's the good thing?"

"Don't ask, you'll know then," she touched my shoulder and turned to leave.

The last lesson is a language lesson.

The Chinese teacher is a middle-aged man in his forties, not tall, he has a characteristic, he always stares at the back wall when he lectures, I don't know what he can see from the wall, his mouth keeps talking, talking about the place where he feels that there is a touchpoint, he will dance with his hands, vivid, the middle line of sight has never left the back wall, I think he should be able to find inspiration from the wall! I think the language is the best of all subjects, because it is the most subjective, you can talk and write without being noticed that there is anything wrong, the author and the reader steal from each other, the teacher and the student deceive each other, and it becomes reasonable in the language, which is very funny! I think that Chinese class is the teacher talking nonsense, and then the classmates listen nonsense, and then according to what the teacher said, and finally write what I think is right, not as rigorous as mathematics, and there is only one answer, so in comparison, I still like mathematics a little more, anyway, I am destined to get mixed up in this class. I wasn't listening to the teacher's lecture, I was thinking, I was thinking about what was the surprise that Guan Wenhui said? I have never encountered any surprises, since I was a child, I have walked all the way ordinary, without waves.

Finally, when the bell rang for the end of class, I didn't make a running posture and prepare to rush out of the classroom as usual, but sat in my seat and watched the others walk out of the classroom one by one, and Guan Wenbin said to let me wait for her. Xiao Wu, Hanzi and Bai Xiao called us outside the door, so we went out together.

I looked at a few of them and said, "What kind of play is this, why are you staring at me?"

Guan Wenbin said, "Today is your birthday, April 20th,"

"I don't remember, I just remember that I never celebrated a birthday. ”

"So, I'll do you a favor and give me your first chance. ”

"Just sing me a birthday song. ”

"Sing, but not here, let's go," he said, dragging me away.

We came to the small restaurant next to the school gate, and Xiao Wu ordered food and beer.

Xiao Wu spoke first, "Today is a good day",

The man took a "", and several of us laughed,

Xiao Wu rolled his eyes, "Fuck off, I'm not saying this for me." ”

"I know, it's for the two of us. "I received,

"Fuck off!" laughed again,

"It's for Chen Zhuo's birthday and our friendship" Xiao Wu raised his glass and drank it all.

"Cheers!"

To be honest, I haven't had many birthdays in these years, and I don't like them, but this time I was really taken aback, and I folded my hands and said, "Thank you." ”

After a while, someone brought a cake over, and the table was already a mess of cups and plates, so the man simply stacked them and made an open space in the middle. Then, like everyone who has a birthday, light a candle, make a wish, blow out the candle, and I cut the cake in the sound of happy birthday, and the man shouted, 'Don't, the cake is not for eating, like this!'" He picked up a piece of cake and slapped me in the face with lightning speed, which made me collapse on the spot, so I picked up a piece and threw it at the man, Xiao Wu couldn't sit still, and slapped it on my face, next to Guan Wenbin and Bai Xiao laughed. Kwan picked up a tissue to help me wipe the cream off my face.

Xiao Wu said, "What a happy couple! I'm really grateful!"

I seemed to be moved, put my arm around his shoulders and said, "Brother Xiaowu, you should also feel happy, brother I am happy," I looked at Guan Wenbin, "Not only because of her, but also because of you good buddies, really." I don't want to meet any new people, I think it's enough to have you, thank you for giving me a birthday, I've never been,"

Guan Wenhui leaned on me, and I could feel her tenderness at that time.

Xiao Wu said that he went to the toilet, and after a while, the man and Bai Xiao said to wash his face, and in the end, only me and Guan Wenbin were left.

I hugged her tight, and she asked me, "What do you wish?"

"Actually, I didn't make a wish. ”

"And what are you thinking when you close your eyes?"

"I'm thinking, what am I doing, like this I'm holding you"

"You're thinking about it again. ”

"Probably, I don't know how far we can go, and I always feel like everything I'm doing is wrong. ”

"For example?"

"For example, now, after the college entrance examination, it is destined to be a bad result"

"You're always cranky, you can't always be like this, like a poet" I laughed,

She continued, "Your melancholy prevents others from touching you, and that's how I mustered up the courage, I was afraid that you would refuse, but I hoped that you would accept it, and you accepted it."

"You think of me too well, my depression is that I am not confident enough, and I am always passive. ”

"I can give you confidence. ”

"Is that okay?"

'Well, as long as you listen to me'. I was confused at the time, I didn't understand what she meant, and I don't understand it now, maybe she wanted to change my personality, I nodded ambiguously, and I gave myself to her, she buried herself deeper in my arms, I kissed her, and she replied to me.

It was getting dark, and the three of them had already run away, so I asked the waiter that the account had been settled, so we went back!

After returning to the dormitory at night, the dormitory manager shouted to turn off the lights to sleep, and the man and I ran to the toilet and squatted on the urinal, he told me that he and Bai Xiao went to the railway station square, and when she couldn't help it, she also bit his lip......