Since fifth grade, Wang Xile seems to have a kind of self-management ability, whether it is on-campus learning or off-campus activities, he can take the initiative to do it in his own way. That day, his wife said, "Tomorrow is the midterm exam, and your son is still holding a mythology book to read!"

I used to buy books for Wang Xile to read, but when he didn't read them, he asked me to tell him stories. This semester, Wang Xile stopped listening to stories, he read the storybook by himself, and found out what I didn't tell correctly, and forgot the parts that I didn't tell.

"The doll goes to school in the hope that he will have the heart to read, and now he is developing in this direction, why should you oppose it. I said.

"That's useless idle books. The book of the exam is the book to be read. The wife said.

"There are no books in the world, let alone idle books, although they seem useless at the moment, but they will be of great use at a certain time. I called my son and said, "Why don't you study for the exam tomorrow?"

"No need to review. I'm sure. ”

At noon on April 30, I met Ms. Liu on my way from work and talked to her about the parents' feedback slip. Teacher Liu said: "It is normal for children to occasionally skip homework. But the courage of your king is too great. In the past, when he didn't write homework, he would always try his best to find reasons to prevaricate, but now he will directly tell the teacher that he didn't write, and then he will go to the class to make up for it. Today's children are too different from the children of the past, and they have changed too much. In the past, when the child had this situation, the teacher was angry and had no idea for a long time. However, your Wang Xile still plays too much, and he can play everything. ”

"Play has always been something that I have developed very much, and it is related to children's language and communication skills when they grow up. Wang Xile has not done anything specific about his studies since the first grade, but only urged the child to insist on self-study for one hour after class, and basically let go of it in the second semester of the third grade, and now he does everything by himself. In early April, there was a problem with homework, mainly due to puberty problems. I said.

"Such a young child will still have puberty problems! Puberty should only happen in junior high school. Teacher Liu said.

Teacher Liu's words made the fable "Heaven and Hell" burst out of my mind.

One day, someone was discussing the question of heaven and hell with God. God said to him, "Come! I'll show you what hell is." "They walked into a house and saw a group of people gathered around a big pot of meat, but everyone looked skinny and hungry. Each of them had a spoon that could reach the pot, but the handle of the spoon was longer than their arm, and they couldn't get the meat into their mouths. If you can't eat meat in your mouth, you can only look at the "meat" and sigh, helpless. "Come on, I'll show you what heaven is. God led the man to another house. Everything here is no different from the previous house. A pot of meat, a group of people, the same long-handled spoon, but everyone is wide and fat, and they are happily singing happiness. The man asked, "Why can't the people of hell eat meat, but the people of heaven can?" God smiled and said, "Quite simply, here each of them feeds someone else." ”

This fable can give us such a revelation: whether a child's education is successful or not, in general, is a matter of children's learning, and its core is to learn the feelings of mutual help between people, which is also the code to heaven through learning. Whether people can have a sense of cooperation between people does not depend on the merits of material conditions, but on whether the educational concept that governs growth conforms to the concept of nature.

For human society, the trajectory of human growth is nothing more than to make one's limbs diligent through play before the age of 12, and then make body movement techniques knowledgeable through imitation. After the age of 12, through knowledge learning, social knowledge is understood, so that the body and mind can generate intellectual reinvention ability. This order of growth is beyond the reach of all living beings in the world, and whoever violates it will have a narrower and narrower path in life. Because once the child is not diligent in his limbs and is not good at speaking, the greater the fear of difficulties, the more serious the emotion, the lack of courage to leave the place he is familiar with, and the psychology of gnawing at the old is easy to appear.

In the afternoon, I had dinner at my mother's house. Wang Xile said that he felt that he did well in the Chinese and mathematics exams, and that he wanted to take advantage of the 'May 1st' long holiday with me tomorrow to ride a bicycle to Yinchuan for a spin.

Wang Xile's words made my head "boom". Yinchuan is more than 200 kilometers away from Jilantai, and it has to cross Helan Mountain on the way. In the past few years, we have camped back and forth for more than ten kilometers, and occasionally did a long distance, and the farthest was only 60 kilometers. The accumulation of bits and pieces makes children have the ambition to challenge the distance. In the face of children's ambition, I no longer see it as a thing, but as an educational success.

"Okay. I said happily.

The son was happy. But the grandparents quit. They repeatedly nag about everything that they could nagged the most. Grandpa saw that the nagging could not change Wang Xile's wishes, and said angrily: "Jianhua, Xile is so young, the family is not without money, what should we do if we get on a bicycle and go to Yinchuan and make Xixi tired? Besides, others still think that we can't afford to buy a ticket to Yinchuan, how embarrassing." If you ride your bicycle away, our father-son relationship will be severed from now on. ”

Daddy pushed the bowl and left.

It's so hard to give my children some freedom in China, and I can only smile wryly......

Back home, Wang Xile said angrily: "Dad, let's go secretly, don't let grandpa know, I have to go to Yinchuan." ”

"Joy, you're not right. You want to ride a bicycle to Yinchuan, it's brave, and Dad is very happy. But now the main problem is not the problem of riding a bicycle to Yinchuan, but the conflict between you and your grandparents, and how to solve the contradiction is the key to the problem. Having said that, the spirit of bravery must be governed by the idea of righteousness and must be harmonized with the right behavior in order to be useful bravery. Otherwise, bravery will turn into a clumsy impulse like a bull, and that bravery is meaningless. We have to find a way to do the thinking work of our grandparents. ”

"Grandparents' thinking work will definitely not be able to be done in a short period of time, because tomorrow will be the 'May 1st' holiday. ”

"You're right. I often tell you that everything moves forward in compromise. If you want to go to Yinchuan, your grandparents are not against you going, they are just against you going by bicycle, is it so difficult that there is only one way to go to Yinchuan by bicycle?"

"Dad, I see. After that, the son pushed the bicycle and went out.

Twenty minutes later, Wang Xile came back, and he said impatiently: "Dad, I went to my father's house first and asked if his car was not going to Yinchuan; then I went to discuss with my grandparents, and they agreed that I should take the shuttle bus to go. ”

I smiled with satisfaction and said, "This is the first time you've gone out on your own." ”

…… Three days later, Wang Xile returned from Yinchuan. He said that he spent a dollar more than planned on the way out.

"Why?" I said.

"There are a lot of people changing trains in Zuoqi, there are no seats on the bus, and I am standing at Yinchuan Railway Station. At that time, I felt a little tired, so I got off the bus for a dollar and got on a bus all the way to the south gate of the old city to my second aunt's house, so that I could stand for an hour less. ”

"Clever, clever, aren't you afraid?"

"What are you afraid of, I have all the security awareness. The son changed the topic and said, "I also made several friends to play basketball in Yinchuan this time, and in order to play basketball with them, my second aunt invited me to eat 'Kende Chicken' several times, but I didn't eat it." ”

"It's natural to play basketball and make friends.

After the "May 1st", Wang Xile's test results also came down, and his Chinese, mathematics, and English scores were full of wonderful, and he once again entered the top five.

However, I can clearly feel from his essay on this exam that adolescent children have changed greatly, and this stage is the critical period for the formation of self-values, and how to make them understand what kind of person they want to be in the future is the top priority of education at this stage. Wang Xile's essay reads:

Liu Lei has changed

Every student in Year 5 is changing. My friend Liu Lei has changed the most, and he has mainly changed in: cooperating with people, being broad-minded, and interacting with people.

Let me be specific. In the past, Liu Lei was very good at working with people, and cooperation was definitely my first choice. In the past, Liu Lei was broad-minded, and he never cared about the collision that others accidentally brought to him. In the past, when Liu Lei was in contact with people, he spoke civilly and did not lose his temper, and he could try to make concessions on things.

But this semester, Liu Lei has changed, completely changed.

Now, Liu Lei not only swears constantly when talking to others, but also likes to use his unique humor to scold people. He always spoils what he has just done, especially when his mind is not lenient. I remember once playing football, Wang Chao accidentally pushed the ball into Liu Lei's face. I know that this kind of ball doesn't hurt, but Liu Lei seems to have a volcanic eruption, and he took the football and looked at Wang Chao's head with a big foot, right in the heart. Suddenly, Wang Chao covered his face and cried bitterly. What is even more unexpected is that Liu Lei not only did not mean to apologize, but also spat on Wang Chao's head, and scolded Wang Chao with arrogant and unreasonable swear words one after another.

The sad Wang Chao was also angry, he suddenly stood up from the ground and kicked Liu Lei hard in the stomach.

Who knows that the wicked will sue first. Liu Lei immediately rushed to the teacher's office to sue Wang Chao. After investigation, the teacher also felt that Wang Chao was reasonable and criticized Liu Lei. Although the matter was solved in this way, I noticed that my friend Liu Lei had changed, completely changed.

Liu Lei, I think you have to be generous-minded in life and things, if you continue like this, you will definitely lose my friend, no, not only me.

Liu Lei, I sincerely say to you: "Liu Lei, come back quickly." ”

After reading the essay on the exam paper, I realized that Wang Xile began to have a moral direction. I said complimentally: "Joy, you can tell the difference between good and bad, and there is no trace of training in what you write, there is always a sense of freshness, and there is a lot of potential for development." ”

In the evening, his wife said that Wang Xile's midterm exam was very good, and it seemed that he didn't have to worry too much about his studies.

"It's far away," I said, "Wang Xile's games are all large-scale intelligent online games, coupled with the proliferation of TV entertainment to death programs, these things are expected to have a huge impact on the outlook on life of Wang Xile, these adolescent children." ”

"Then hurry up and prevent it. The wife said.

"Education is life. It is impossible to prevent things that grow, and they can only evolve according to changes in reality. I said.