I still don't know what this disease is about, I only know that I am going to be finished, I don't listen to the doctor's words, and I don't have any impression of this disease in my mind, only that the disease is very serious.

I looked up at the sky, but there was only a pale ceiling and a dim lamp, I felt that I was in the sea of life, I was just an ant, a little wind blowing a small wave could shoot me to pieces, if the providence made people, I was powerless to change.

But fate has already done this, what does he want me to do!

I was confused, I couldn't think of anything in my head, what should I do next? I spent these days like the walking dead, but I still have nostalgia, I still have reluctance, and there are so many precious things.

So what should He Yulu do? Do I want to tell her directly? I asked myself, I really can't say it, that is really too cruel.

We are already connected by the same fate, and her background is so pitiful, she has suffered a series of blows, how can she bear so much pain!

However, what if I didn't tell her earlier and delayed treatment?

My heart suddenly became hot, she already knew about me, maybe I didn't tell her so that there would be no pain in each other.

But will her heart always care about my safety?

I'm conflicted, I hope it is, and I hope it doesn't.

I sometimes ask myself if this feeling is love, but my head is a mess, I don't know, and I can't tell the difference.

The most important thing now is treatment, these things may only be thought about in the next life.

With the current situation, I can only be treated by He Yulu, maybe the moment I was told the bad news, I had no hope from the bottom of my heart. However, He Yulu needs such a long treatment, I have to be strong to endure, and I have to keep watching her get better.

The people who loved me floated back to my mind, my relatives, parents, friends, brothers, colleagues......

Perhaps, I am really going to abandon them, and this feeling is very painful, because I am still very young, I am only twenty-four years old, the age of the prime, but those good times are no longer mine.

In the past 24 years, the past is vivid, when I was a child, I was always an excellent student in the eyes of adults and teachers, never fighting, never scolding, never making trouble, and excellent grades, which may make me feel a little more relieved now.

Perhaps, everything that used to be can be repeated, and I asked myself if I would spend all my days drinking and drinking, fighting, and living happily in this young time?

But it's all a pipe dream, and I have less and less to do now.

I had to seize every minute and every second of the moment, and I looked at the list in my hand, it was the doctor's prescription, and it seemed to be my life, and it could continue my life.

Although I know that I can also have hope, but now, if I really have to choose one between me and He Yulu to live, then the answer ...... I don't really have a choice.

I have only one thought, I die, she can't die.

So, I took a deep breath, wiped my tears, and let me live well now, this last time.

Passing by the ward where He Yulu's father was, I didn't turn around, I didn't look, I went down to the first floor with the list and went to prescribe some medicine, life-saving medicine.

The hospital is a place to save lives, how many patients come and go, and how many people's hearts are moved by this hospital.

An old man fell, a young man next to him immediately ran over, helped the old man, I saw that they did not know each other, a woman next to a man supporting, that should be her husband, the woman is not looking at the man, the man has been lowering his head, and the man's complexion is not as good as the woman's complexion, the other side remembered a little girl's laughter, has been shouting "grandpa" , The little girl ran forward, but the other hand tightly pulled a woman behind her, it should be her mother, I saw her mother with tears on her face, but she kept looking up, and the little girl couldn't see it from that angle......

I shook my head and went to grab my medicine.

I took out a blue pill and put it in my mouth, I frowned, and it was sweet.

I walked to the elevator, I squinted my eyes, and kept saying, to be strong, at least to be strong in front of He Yulu, otherwise, how could she still have the courage to fight against the disease?

I stood outside the ward, took a few deep breaths, and smiled reluctantly, I must have looked ugly, I don't know if I could tell that I was laughing, I couldn't care so much.

When I walked into the ward, He Yulu's father was still lying in a coma, I don't know if he was asleep.

And He Yulu sat on the side, holding her chin, thinking about something all the time.

I walked over gently, bit my lip, and asked her if she was okay.

He Yulu was obviously stunned for a moment, quickly stood up, looked at me, I saw her lips trembling, did she want to say something?

However, she didn't say anything, shook her head, and turned her head to the side.

I felt that our atmosphere was very depressing, so I asked He Yulu, where did Auntie go?

He Yulu said that her aunt went to buy food.

He Yulu was always indifferent when she spoke, her face was expressionless, her eyes were dull, her eyes were staring ahead, but she had no focus at all.

I don't know what she was thinking, she didn't ask me where I had just been.

I wanted to persuade her, maybe she was worried about me, but I was even more depressed than hers, and when I was about to speak, I couldn't help but choke.

I sat on the stool next to her, accompanied her, and sat quietly.

I tried to tell her the truth again, but the words kept making me choke up and swallow back.

Maybe I should pick a good time and tell her.

Otherwise it's really cruel, and I think I'm cruel too.

"What is your dream?" He Yulu asked me.

"My dream?" I don't know why He Yulu asked, but my heart suddenly hurt again, the current dream may really be a dream: "I don't have a dream, it's good to be realistic." ”

"Do you want to know my dreams?" He Yulu didn't turn her head, just said softly.

"Hmm. I looked at He Yulu, her eyes were so delicate, and her sad face made me want to go up and kiss her.

"My dream is that the person I like can kiss me on the forehead every day and say they love me, and in the evening, in the sunset, hold my hand and walk together. He Yulu suddenly turned her head to look at me.

"It's that simple?" I thought Yulu would like that kind of luxurious life, but I didn't expect it to be so simple and warm.

I saw He Yulu's eyes, that kind of eyes attracted me, attracted my eyes, so that I couldn't squint, I just stared at her quietly, her eyes, her eyebrows, her lips, her hair, like clear river water.

"Can you take me for a walk?" He Yulu said.

"Yes, yes. I couldn't help choking up, maybe she also knew that my time was running out, and she wanted to spend more time with me in this last time, so what she meant, I could take a walk with her as someone she liked, and I couldn't help but feel my heart ache.

I took a deep breath and told myself to be strong, He Yulu was so strong, how could I fall down so vulnerable.

I have an urge to hold her, an urge to protect her for the rest of my life.

I bit my lip and asked He Yulu, "Now?"

"At dusk. He Yulu shook her head.

"Oh. I bowed my head.

"Do you know why it has to be dusk?" He Yulu stared into my eyes.

"I don't know. I shook my head, I kept twisting my head, looking at He Yulu's face, I didn't want to miss a second.

"Because when we are white, it is like dusk, and I hope that on the day when we grow old, he can still hold my hand like this and walk quietly. Ning Meixuan said, she stared at me, her eyes didn't blink, I felt her eyes were tender like water.

I suddenly wanted to tell her about my dream, but what was the use of saying it, I shook my head, but still didn't speak.

She looked at me, I looked at her, my heart was beating, and a voice inside me told me, hold her, put her on the forehead, give her a gentle kiss, but I didn't do it. I had to suppress myself as much as I could.

That's it, how I wish that time would be frozen in this second, in this moment of beautiful time.

We all know that this is not possible. Reality doesn't allow us to be so good.

"Rice, bought back. At the door, I suddenly remembered my aunt's voice, and my aunt walked in with a smile and said, "It's time to be hungry, hurry up and eat." ”

Auntie handed me the meal, I at this time, I noticed Auntie's dress, Auntie's hands are very white and tender, the skin is very good and smooth, presumably it was very well maintained before, but now she is wearing a plain clothes, and she has never complained, the person on the hospital bed is her expectation and dependence. Maybe it was a hard time, but I didn't see my aunt's complaining eyes.

With the aunt's current state of maintenance, coupled with her plump figure, she can still find another good mate at this age, which is definitely another happy life, but the aunt would rather guard outside the ward, although she can't help, but the blessing and love have never been broken.

What an enviable love!

Envy can be touching, I lowered my head and pulled the rice into my mouth, two tears dripped on the rice, the mouth was salty, but it was so fragrant.

I glanced at He Yulu, who was holding chopsticks and kept pricking and pricking in the rice, but she didn't eat a bite.

I ate two bites, I couldn't eat anymore, I was afraid that I would not be able to bear it when I saw He Yulu again.

I walked down the hallway, lit a cigarette, and smoked slowly.

I closed my eyes and thought about every word of He Yulu, I had a feeling that He Yulu was in love with me, and I was also in love with He Yulu.

I could tell from the look in her eyes.

But we couldn't be together anymore.

I felt a little cold on my face, I wiped it and it was water.

I'm with my eyes closed, am I crying again?

It's useless for me to hate myself, a big man, my dream is to be a man and protect my beloved, but I am so cowardly, I can't even protect myself, how can I fall in love.

I also wondered if someone would help me and pay for our medical expenses, but I still thought in vain.

How can I accept it with peace of mind?

Perhaps, there is no one to accompany me to grow old together, my fate is already doomed, fate is unknown, but the road has been paved, only I am left to walk step by step.

I also thought about whether Chen Ya could turn back, whether I would fall in love with Hu Jing and Ning Meixuan, but my fate no longer allowed me to love.

My road is almost finished, and their road is still long, long, and I can't accompany them to that end.