Mom is still in my head.

I kept trying to convince her, to prove that I was doing the right thing. This kind of influence is not allowed to exist, and if I have to consider my mother first in everything I do, then I am kidnapped by my own perception.

Because what can affect me is all the virtual data about my mother in my head.

Since the first time I started killing my mother, it has not been smooth. I would love to show off that I am a filial child, but the content of this show-off itself is distorted, but it is just a forced load of society on the character, just like aesthetics.

There is no so-called value system that can influence me, and there is no so-called authority figure that can influence me. Is there one that isn't full of characters? Which one isn't to make the characters plump?

Because he is afraid that his offspring will not take care of him, he forces himself to be filial to his parents, so that when he is old, he can obtain the filial piety of his children.

Is there anything more ridiculous than this? I really don't know how much fear filled the mind of the author who wrote what he carried up the mountain and threw the old man with a flat burden? Is it normal for this fear to be passed on from generation to generation and named it a traditional virtue?

If it is said that my mother has raised me for so many years, with hard work, if I am not filial, then my mother might as well raise a dog. This statement is to deny the so-called love, that is, to show that filial piety is only the result of a transaction.

I know that in the general environment of the empire, there are actually these so-called conventions and customs for having children. For example, "I am naturally responsible for my children", "I am for the good of my children, and I can give up everything for my children", "When my children grow up, I can enjoy pure happiness" and so on.

Why should I agree with these self-definitions? Since I have been deceived, there will naturally be a moment of awakening.

Yes, cruel, but I never thought I would have a happy future.

Think about my mother's hard work, think about my mother's gray hair now, and think about my mother's joy every time I go home. No one wants to kill their family, especially if there is not much conflict with their parents.

Unfortunately, none of this is true.

Where did my feelings for my mother come from? If I had grown up in a different society, would this kind of affection for my mother be different? To be honest, these emotions are not spontaneous, but the result of being publicized over and over again in society.

It's like a loop of the Divine Comedy.

Is filial piety wrong? That's right.

Is there anything wrong with not being filial?

It doesn't matter what behavior you choose, but these things can't be the basis for making or swaying choices. If you don't give up these self-definitions, then it's just a template life. Obviously, I'm not dealing with filial piety and other things.

On the contrary, these self-definitions often collide with each other in the mind, leading to emotional tugging.

This Nima is completely pulled out of the body one by one, it is so painful, it is so unreasonable. Those flesh and blood make up the character of Yuan Changwen, making the character flesh and blood, rather than a dull machine. But now, I'm going to rip out the flesh and blood.

Outwardly, the flesh was intact and elastic, just as striking as normal skin. But in fact, the skin was full of rotten, foul-smelling flesh that had been forcibly tied there.

None of the roles of Yuan Changwen were chosen by himself, and all of them were instilled by others. Everyone accepts it this way, so do I. Everyone doesn't doubt that they are all striving for the goal of the pinnacle of life, so I should do the same, otherwise I will look very unsociable.

The most ridiculous thing is that my words and deeds do not agree with filial piety at all, or in other words, the so-called filial piety is not as important as it is said in my eyes. So, what's not to discuss? What's not to delve into?

The paradox is that the heart is compared to the heart. Characters will say, "When I'm old, no one will be filial to me, how painful it is," but there's also a hidden self-definition here, why do my children have to be filial to me?

Like, no one took care of me, and that's a very painful thing. It's like, I don't have friends, I don't have family, and that's one of the ugly things. It's like, if I keep being alone, then it will be a catastrophe in my life.

Yuan Changwen felt very uncomfortable, and the whole person was in a predicament, in a dilemma. The surrounding mountains are getting closer, and the mere momentum is overwhelming.

Why is this shit still in my head? Why do I have to kill it when it's fake, when it doesn't exist? What kind of shit does the character distort into that even the fake can be killed?

Why is my mom still here? Why am I responsible for my mom's emotions? I don't know my mom's emotional state at all, everything is just my guess, I've been interacting with the virtual data in my head, what's the reason why can't I stop?

I never doubted these things, but my mom did keep influencing me in my head. Even though it seems like I've been away from my mom for an unknown number of light years, I still try to convince her and convince her in a mental fantasy scenario.

No one can continue to occupy my brain, to empty it, to burn it, to burn all those distorted perceptions and opinions, to burn all those false self-definitions. There are so many templates in my head that it seems like I don't need to think about it at all, just follow the template.

Everybody is like that anyway.

Damn it!

This is the template role, which has not been thought about at all, or rather, the so-called thinking is nothing more than unquestioning belief in authority, books, etc. I accept whatever template others give, and I am completely swayed by fear.

It seems that my cognition has upgraded, and I will change the template today and tomorrow. But if you don't get rid of your fears, then it's all the same driving force, and it doesn't change your whole life. Change the template, then sooner or later, driven by fear, the same essence will be applied again.

Once the time is removed, I don't know if my mom is my mom or not, and I don't know if the self-definition in my head is the self-definition I really want. My mother's hard work will become blurred, because I can't be sure if my mother has done these loving upbringings.

Even if all of this is true, my mother really exists, and it does take a lot of hard work to raise me. Now my mother does have some gray hair, and her body has entered the category of old age. Then, I must be filial to my mother in return for her nurturing kindness...... Is it?

Ha!

If I care so much about my children, I will exchange everything I have for the growth of my children. Wouldn't I be bitter and bitter when my children kill me, when my children are not filial to me?

It was this fear that allowed me to establish a self-definition of filial piety, so that my mother could exert influence in my mind.

Can the giver of life be so presumptuous?