When night falls, the light bulbs come on.

More than three hours have passed from the murder to being arrested and taken into the fast house, to the interrogation and now the temporary guard.

Yuan Changwen sat there all the time, not moving, not eating, and not drinking.

Just sit there.

The tears are gone, but the sadness is always around.

It's easy to say, everything is a self-woven definition. But when I really encountered it, I realized the difficulty of killing.

That's all yourself!

All of them are the experiences, experiences, handling methods, behavioral principles and so on accumulated by this person named Yuan Changwen year after year.

It can be said that if the personality of Yuan Changwen is analyzed, then these events are analysis data.

Let an acquaintance introduce Yuan Changwen, then what can be told is these things.

But none of this is me!

I've met my mom before, and I want to kill these definitions, but it seems to pass me gently every time.

Maybe it's because you can't do it, or maybe the devil is still deceiving and misleading.

The reason doesn't matter, it's like this now, and there's no going back.

Even if I can hold on to these emotions, I still think that "she worked hard to raise me as an adult, so I have to repay her well." ”

But there is always a voice that sounds at the same time, "These are the definitions of self-weaving." ”

I will watch my mother be happy and happy, and I will do something to make my mother proud in the circle of friends.

But there will always be that voice, repeated in the bottom of my heart, in my ears.

Is this real?

No, not really.

Everything about maternal love, everything about filial piety, is the definition of self-weaving.

Maybe it's the propaganda of society, maybe it's the school's teaching, maybe it's the life of the ears.

Most of all, it should be fear.

I am afraid that when my children grow up, they will not be filial to themselves, but their hard work in the past 20 years has been exchanged for indifferent children.

Therefore, filial piety should be propagated from generation to generation to prevent such animal-like behavior.

But what was that emotion?

Why do we involuntarily cry for the little video of thanking our mothers?

Yuan Changwen wanted to say it out loud, so maternal love is real, and it is not the definition of self-weaving at all!

Unfortunately, it can't be done.

Emotions are the product of defining interactions with reality, and we cry because we feel indebted to our mothers.

And we feel indebted to our mother because we think "Mother gives so much, and we should also give so much." ”

When we watch small videos and realize that we don't give that much, self-definition and reality come into play.

But in fact, we still have a small, hidden self-definition in our hearts.

We don't give this definition lightly because it's dangerous.

"She's my mom, so she should have done so much for me. ”

This definition is very bastard, whoever dares to say it, the people around you will not beat you to death, but will also curse the dead. They will even go around proclaiming, "Look, he's that bastard son!"

Or, "Come and see, there are people here who are comfortable accepting their parents' contributions." ”

Let's not talk about the self-definition of these people's behavior, as for the definition of that bastard, everyone has always denied it.

Justified only by deeds.

If you think about what you're doing, does it fit this definition of self-weaving?

"She's my mom, so she should have done so much for me. ”

Yuan Changwen raised his hand and slapped him in the face.

Not just because of this definition, but also because he found that he didn't love his mother that much.

Most of the definitions of self-weaving are casually put in the mind without one's own consent.

The "self" does not pay attention to filial piety or not, it only cares about itself, as long as it ensures the survival of the self, it does not matter what definition it weaves.

Yuan Changwen saw it clearly now, with full of anger.

It is the "self", weaving countless definitions, which may complement each other, such as "if people don't have dreams, what is the difference between them and salted fish", "life is to work hard" and so on.

It may be self-contradictory, such as "there is no circle without rules", "rules are dead, people are alive" and so on.

Yuan Changwen was very angry, because the definition of "self" made him miss a lot of opportunities to get together with his mother.

And those definitions were put into his head without his consent.

You've got a kind!

I won't kill you, Lao Tzu swears not to be a man!

From today onwards, I, Yuan Changwen, do not have any other goals. If I don't get rid of you, I'm not going to give up!

In order to fulfill me, my mother even said that I would be killed.

I've never hated you so much as I do now!

I was still hesitating before, phew!

I, Yuan Changwen, swear......

Well?!

Who is Yuan Changwen?

My name is Yuan Changwen, but I am not Yuan Changwen.

So, from now on, I am me, and Yuan Changwen is Yuan Changwen.

We are the enemy from now on!

This thought, like a thunderbolt, exploded in my ears.

Yuan Changwen stood up suddenly, panting, but his face was full of smiles.

"Hahahaha!"

The uncontrollable laughter echoed all around.

"Hey, buddy, are you alright?"

Yuan Changwen smiled: "I'm fine, but Yuan Changwen doesn't have to." ”

The bald head listened,! Is this being taken away?!

Cautiously asked, "Who are you?"

Yuan Changwen: "I don't know, I've been asking who I am." ”

bald head: "Who is Yuan Changwen?"

Yuan Changwen pointed to himself and said, "That's this person." ”

Bald head: "Brother, don't scare me, isn't this a split personality?

Yuan Changwen laughed and said, "I'm fine, on the contrary, I'm in a very good condition! I told you, I'm not my name, let alone my story." So, I decided to keep the two separate.

I am me, a me who has no answers. The other is the person in front of you, Yuan Changwen. He has a name, he has an experience, he has a story. ”

The bald head widened his eyes and said incredulously: "You mean, there are two people, one is you and the other is Yuan Changwen." ”

"Yes. ”

Bald head: "Then who am I talking to now? Is that you, or Yuan Changwen?"

"Of course it'......"

Yuan Changwen suddenly stopped talking, he originally wanted to say "Of course it's me", but there was a problem here, and he was interrupted by the boss when he went into the toilet after thinking about it before.

It is already an indisputable conclusion that the body falls within the realm of "inconclusive truth".

But what about thinking?

If thinking also falls within the realm of "indefinite truth", according to the previous analysis, I am thinking this or that with my mind, and it does not prove the truth of my thinking.

But at this point, there is a question, who is using thinking?

Similarly, Who is controlling the body?

"Is it me, or Yuan Changwen?"

Yuan Changwen muttered to himself and began to pace in the cubicle, thinking.

I just took two steps, but I stopped.

Because...... Who's thinking?

Is there such a possibility: suppose that every second of Yuan Changwen's birth to the present has been recorded. Actions, words, thoughts, thoughts, etc., everything is recorded. This data is then put together and analyzed.

So, is it possible to predict Yuan Changwen's next behavior, or idea?

Is it possible to create an environment for this data to force Yuan Changwen to make specific choices or ideas?

If possible, then these things are based on Yuan Changwen's experience, education, and so on.

But these, not me.

In other words, it is not me who controls the body and mind, but Yuan Changwen...... Is it?"

Yuan Changwen was talking to himself, but when he said this, he was a little unwilling.

Not reconciled?

Is it because I'm unwilling, or is the "self" unwilling?

These emotions are self-woven definitions, additives added to the background. So, I'm the background!"

Huh, why does it sound good?

It's been a long time, and I'm that background?!

No, the background is just a description, a metaphor.

But the existence of the "self", the definition of those weaving, obscures me. If you erase these definitions, then the rest is me.

"Moreover, it's not me who is talking at all, but Yuan Changwen who is talking!"

Yuan Changwen stared at the bald head.

"It's not that I'm thinking, it's Yuan Changwen thinking!"

Yuan Changwen rushed over, grabbed the steel bar and shook it vigorously, and roared:

"So, who am I?!"