Why haven't I gotten out of character? Am I doing something wrong? Is this all going in circles, or is it really moving forward?

As long as you move forward, even if it's a small step at a time, it doesn't matter. But how do I know for sure I'm really moving forward?

Yuan Changwen looked at the night sky outside the window, and didn't know if the current night was different from the night just now? Time has advanced a little, maybe one minute, maybe two minutes, but is my step really moving forward?

Do I rely on this uncomfortable, lucid cycle every time? So, how do I know if it's a character's deception? I say to myself, "Well, well, it's this uncomfortable lucid cycle that shows that I'm moving forward", but is it possible that it turns into a deliberate search for this cycle, or turns this cycle into a show off for myself?

That's right, it's to show off with discomfort. It's very uncomfortable, but deep down it's, "Look, you scumbags, you don't know what it means to kill, you don't know I'm killing" or something like that.

Pride, what is Lao Tzu proud of?

Yuan Changwen hammered the wall, and did not use his spiritual power, so naturally he did not destroy the wall. On the contrary, my hand is still very painful.

It's really meaningless, I've done so many chapters of slashing, it still hurts to hit the wall, I'm still a mortal fetus, what am I doing it for?

Yuan Changwen knew that he had embarked on this road at the beginning, and he didn't know what was going on. It's hard to say exactly what it was that made the whole slaughter begin. It was as if a series of things were accumulating, and in the end he decisively left the empire alone, leaving no backup plans.

Either I die, or the character dies.

Of course, at that time, I didn't know about the role. But I am glad that I have embarked on this path, this lonely and gloomy path. It must be lit with the fire of anger, and you must be on high alert, otherwise you will be played to death by the character every minute.

What exactly do I have?

If life is not mine, then what do I have?

Since I'm not even afraid of death, what am I still afraid of losing?

I'm not done yet, but I can only say that I am still thinking that I am part of something real. I still have self-definition, and I still have things that I can't discard. And it's that thing that's still holding me back.

There is no trace of truth in the falsehood, the false is the limitation, how can the infinite be seen in the limitation?

It's the characters who block the reality, it's originally "selfless", it's just "I exist". But the character covers all this with self-definition, and when the character of Yuan Changwen looks at the trees, it is not the character who is looking at it at all, but "I exist" and perceive it.

But the character will not recognize this, and will use various cutting methods to make the trees understandable. Those labeled things can make me ignore the trees and just care about a series of labels in my head.

Is this the one who stops "I exist"?

The same seems to be true of the previous lightness, with no character involvement, no damn self-definition, just staring at what the eyes see.

I have to keep reminding myself that there is no one else at all, everyone is just in my head.

Well, at the end of the day, I'm just entertaining myself with my imagination. All the relationships, all the emotional conflicts, are just my own amusement.

I first imagine a person in my head, and then I take that imagination as reality. And so I continued to imagine how the person in my head would react if I did that, would they care, would they laugh at me, would they worship me?

Then, when the real person stands in front of me, I update the database in my head, guess the other person's inner thoughts through the other person's behavior, and then flesh out the image of the person I imagine in my mind.

No matter what the other person says or does in front of me, in the end, what I interact with is the imaginary data in my head. When the other person's words and actions do not hurt my self-definition, everything is easy to say. Once the character's self-definition is hurt, it will inevitably cause an emotional surge.

It's the other party's fault anyway, it's as simple as that. I'm not wrong, even if it's just a little bit.

Damn it!

What am I doing?

Aren't these things already clear before? Why do I have to repeat them? Do I believe it, or am I being played around in circles by the characters, using the realization of the past to show my own progress?

However, if everyone is my imagination, then it doesn't seem like it takes so much effort to kill emotions. There is no need to discuss maternal love and love as a kind of transaction, and when the character data in the mind is cleared, the corresponding relationship will naturally be cleared.

Taking it a step further, everything is an opinion. Whether it is people or things, it is their own opinion. When something happens, my reaction is already set, because the self-definition is already there, waiting to interact with the event to generate emotions.

I can't do it yet, it's what happens. I judge everything and want to express my own opinions, even though I express my opinions internally, it also means that I agree with those opinions.

When things happen, I gather information through a limited perspective and put it in my head to construct the truth of the matter. The next time something else happens, I continue to gather information and fill out the truth of the matter in my head. In this way, I thought I had the truth of the matter, so I did what I imagined in my head.

Then, isn't it funny to complain about how the world didn't develop the way you imagined it?

It's like a wave coming in, and I'm just a drop of seawater. Then through the amount of information of this drop of seawater, the future of the entire wave can be judged.

That is, it is always a distorted, always a humble opinion to be true.

How can you not be afraid of this kind of life? You will always be afraid, because deep down you will always know that what you are sure of is just a guess. The so-called variables are actually the parts that you don't grasp and the parts you don't know.

No matter how inspirational the words, no matter how passionate the encouragement, it is just to let the heart let go of this knowing for a while, and temporarily focus all its attention on the words. After a while, it will be clear that everything you know is a guess.

Well, it's all too normal to be afraid of something bad happening in the future. The reason why characters can make up stories to fear is because what is in this kind of story can really happen.

When we do things according to the perception in our minds, we are based on our imagination of the world, so it is possible to imagine that other bad things will happen. Because our information is limited, there must be something unknowable that influences the course of things.

How do I know what the unknowable will do to things? Naturally, fear will take advantage of the weakness and make me hold on to certain attributes of the character.

The only way to get rid of fear is to let it in and see what you're fearing about. When I don't rely on the information in my head to make judgments and choices, I naturally have no fear.

Just like a drop of sea water in the waves, if you rely on yourself to judge, how can you keep up with the rhythm?

At that time, I couldn't even control the characters, and fear couldn't come in at all. Of course, happiness probably can't get in.