I am a character in this world, none of these things are me, it is Yuan Changwen who speaks, Yuan Changwen who thinks, and Yuan Changwen who acts. There's no me at all, it's all fake, it's all this character.

Yuan Changwen stood at the window, his mind like crazy, repeating this sentence constantly.

It's like Mario knows he's just a game character called Super Mario, and everything about it, body shape, thought patterns, jumping, walking, etc., is fake.

Moreover, the person who knows this falsehood is also false himself.

Yuan Changwen knew that everything he knew was false, but this knowledge itself also belonged to Yuan Changwen, which was also false.

I thought that after clearing all the untruths, I would be able to catch the truth.

Catch a fart!

I ruined everything, not to mention leaving my job to come to this mental hospital, ruining my self-definition in terms of career. The point is that all other self-definitions have disappeared.

All along, I have identified the self-woven definition as hostile forces, as objects to be killed, believing that they are hindering my ability to touch the truth.

But now, these self-woven definitions are necessities, necessities for one's own existence in this world.

At the beginning, I expected that the self-definition of positivity would also need to be killed. But I didn't expect that the price of awakening would be like this.

Like a fool, he slaughtered all the self-definitions regardless of the importance, and finally came to the conclusion that he must have self-definitions.

However, after the self-definition of slaughter, can it still be the same as before?

If you look at it with the eyes of normal people, the Yuan Changwen they are familiar with has disappeared. The various self-definitions that constituted Yuan Changwen have been killed.

What is reserved at this moment is a self-definition that even Yuan Changwen himself does not know what to keep. Can this self-defined Yuan Changwen still be the same as before?

Isn't this a different person, but what is it?

Maybe you can still laugh, maybe you still cry, maybe you still have preferences, but when no one is around, that discomfort seems to remind you all the time that all this is false.

His essence is that awareness, the so-called Yuan Changwen, is just something he doesn't know at all.

Just like now, that faint sadness wraps around me, like molting, depriving the "self" layer by layer. This phenomenon is not diverted by one's own attention at all.

Even if it's to play and work hard, you don't have time to think. This feeling will also follow closely, and it will invade quickly at a certain interval.

Take the first step and you'll never come back.

All Yuan Changwen can do is delay.

But why should you procrastinate?

At the beginning, I just couldn't stand the pull of emotions, so I took the first step to start killing self-definition. How can I deliberately let my "self" survive and delay the whole process?

When will it end? I don't know.

How long will it end? I don't know.

Perhaps, there is no end.

Further!

Again, this word is simply the only magic weapon on the path to awakening.

No matter what, he still didn't wake up after all, Yuan Changwen looked at the sky in the distance, and he still didn't stand on the top of the mountain.

Well, we still need to move on.

However, where can we take a step? There is nothing, everything is false, and everything belongs to the role of Yuan Changwen.

Where do you go?

There are nothing to slash because they don't exist in the first place. Trying to kill them is in itself a sign of their existence.

That faint sadness still envelops Yuan Changwen, from the inside out.

I really want to jump off a building to end my life.

Unfortunately, this is not the solution. If you have the urge to die, why don't you let go?

Surrender and let the Tao take control of your own ship of life.

I'm tired, I'm really tired.

What is there to think about?

The so-called thinking is to decompose, summarize, and organize the world to facilitate one's own understanding. But these thoughts break the world as it is, allowing yourself to focus on thinking, on those labels.

Don't think about it, let it go, surrender.

Yuan Changwen suddenly felt like he had run a marathon, so tired and tired. Not only the mind, but also the body is very tired.

It's morning!

I just woke up from bed!

Could it be that this kind of thinking can be so nerve-wracking that it has to be recovered by sleep?!

Then go to bed.

Anyway, the behavior of working during the day is originally the consensus of society and everyone's agreement. There is no foundation and no logic at all, it is just a group of people who agree that we work during the day and sleep at night.

"Ego"!

Why can't you just go to sleep when you want? Because if you break everyone's convention, you won't be able to work well and you won't be able to get paid. If everyone follows suit, then the whole society will be chaotic and will not be able to form a so-called civilization at all.

Therefore, for the sake of the development of society and the progress of human civilization, we must abide by these conventions and must restrain the natural reactions of the body.

Not only restraint, but also reward such restraint so that everyone can abide by it. We will restrain the body's natural response, call it self-discipline, and preach it on a large scale.

When the "self" is noticed and praised, in order to maintain this appearance, you must put in the effort to maintain it. And the definition of self-weaving also derives energy from it to strengthen the buildings on the desert.

This is how I have lived for more than 20 years.

Looking back now, it's really hard to imagine why I had to endure this kind of life at the beginning, why didn't I tear my scalp and ask loudly, what is going on with this Nima!

Was your former self wrong? That's right.

Now I know these things, is it useful? It's useless.

Yuan Changwen lives in this world, and there must be a self-defined existence, so is there a difference between knowing that self-definition is false or not knowing?

The only difference is that the mentality is different. The former self will take all this as real. Now I can't see their authenticity.

What's the use? Can you fly, or can you turn a stone into gold?

Yuan Changwen is dissipating, not in the physical sense, but the self-definition that constitutes Yuan Changwen is dissipating. The final result was that Yuan Changwen became another person with the same body.

The way of speaking, the way of behaving, and the angle of thinking are all different.

I wasn't happy, and I didn't have the so-called ecstasy, is it because I didn't reach the end?

Again, it's awake or not. All other words are whitewashed, and they are all covering up the truth of the facts.

So, I didn't wake up.

Go to Nima's Awakening!

Eat the and go!

Yuan Changwen suddenly didn't want to take care of any awakening, Lao Tzu let it go, whatever you want!

I don't know and don't want to know what happens next, I don't have to think about it, I don't have to think about it, I don't want to think about it, I don't want to think about it.

It doesn't matter if you are a god or a Buddha, a god or a monster, even if it is a piece of, I surrender to you.

That's it!

Slept.