Oh, yes, she said to me before she turned around, she said, "Cersei, you return the money to Shengyin, the IOU will be torn up directly, and you won't come back in the future, I will treat it as if I never gave birth to you, you can also help me, help your brother, let us live, don't come back......"

I really don't have a home anymore!

The realization slammed into my chest, my throat choked on something, and a knot stuck in my heart, and I shrank back uncomfortably and closed my eyes suddenly.

It's a nightmare, right? It must be just a dream, right?

The edge of the bed sank, and I felt someone sit down, reaching out to hold my hand, and Lu Xudong's gentle voice rang in my ears: "Cusser...... Be good, obedient, get up and have something to eat, okay?"

I didn't move, I didn't want to move, his voice reminded me that I wasn't dreaming, everything was real! The pain of being completely abandoned in my heart was so strong that I just wanted to shrink up and hide away.

If I had complained about my mother's patriarchy before, then at this moment, I just hope that she is really patriarchal. How can she hate me, she conceived and gave birth to me in October, how can she hate me!

......Lu Xudong got into bed, lay down next to me, gently dragged me into his arms, and hugged me tightly, "Don't think nonsense, just tell me if you have anything to say, don't keep it in your heart, okay?"

His gentleness warmed my heart, I buried my face in his chest, tears couldn't help flowing again, I choked, and only whispered to him after a while: "My mother doesn't really want me, she is just angry for a while, right?"

Lu Xudong didn't speak, he took a deep breath, hugged my arm and tightened it slightly, and said after a long time: "You still have me, Cersei, I will always be with you!"

He carefully stroked my hair, his voice was as gentle as water, I calmed down a little, sniffed again, and then said: "Actually, I know, she can't really hate me, she taught me since I was a child, saying don't believe in fate, she is the least fateful person, how can you believe those fortune tellers, how can you really think that I killed my father, she never said this......"

I grabbed Lu Xudong's clothes, as if I was looking for evidence for myself, and chattered: " When I was seven years old, I just learned to ride a bicycle, I couldn't wait to ride out into the street, but I collided head-on with a motorcycle, I even fell to the ground with the car, and my leg was broken, but I don't know if I hit someone first, I got up and pushed the car and ran, and when I went home I hid and cried, when my mother found me, she scolded me, and after scolding, she deliberately took me to the clinic, in fact, the one on my leg was just a scratch of the skin......

"When I was in elementary school, I knew that my family was poor, and it was not easy to go to school, so I basically wouldn't be late and leave early, once I had a fever, and the whole person was in a daze, and the teacher asked me to go home to rest, but I refused to live or die, and finally the teacher didn't know how to contact my mother, she asked for leave and ran to school, carried me to the clinic to see a doctor, and carried me home......" I raised my lips and smiled, and said with some sadness" "If she really hates me, she doesn't need to do this, doesn't she?"

Lu Xudong curled his fingers and touched my face, his eyes were full of pity: "Fool, there is no parent who doesn't love his child, your mother must be very entangled and embarrassed, she is just too emotional today, just wait for a few days to calm down...... Don't cry ......."

He pulled his clothes to wipe my tears, I sniffed, barely held back the surging tears, and continued: "Actually, it doesn't matter if she really hates me, she has lasted alone for so many years, she was only thirty years old when my father died, she could have beaten me out, threw my brother to my grandmother, and then found someone to live again, but she didn't ......"

My heart felt like it had been cut, and it hurt inch by inch, and I couldn't imagine how my mother felt at that time, when she looked at me in swaddling clothes.

"When I moved out of the house, there was a period of time when I complained about her, especially that time when I had acute gastroenteritis, I was alone in the hospital for a hanging needle, I went to the bathroom, I accidentally got the needle off, and I was covered in blood, I was so dazed and at a loss, crying there, I felt like I was abandoned by the whole world......"

I paused and calmed down the sourness in my heart, "I really blamed her at the time, complained that she didn't feel sorry for me at all, at that time I kept thinking that she was not good to me since I was a child, I thought about it, I just comforted myself and said, it's okay, just wait for me to get married, anyway, she said, when I get married, I will be someone else's family, so I can no longer care about her!"

But the next day, she came to the company dormitory to see me, saying that she came by while she was out to buy vegetables, and brought me soup, saying that it was boiled for my sister-in-law to drink, but she didn't finish it. At the time, I thought, no wonder I can have my share, it turned out that my sister-in-law drank leftovers, but even so, I still feel very satisfied. ”

I buried my head in Lu Xudong's chest and rubbed all the tears that came out silently on his clothes, "Actually, now think about it seriously, my home is so far away from my company, how can she go to me to buy vegetables, she just uses the excuse to go out, she is just afraid that my sister-in-law will know that she has come to see me, she still doesn't worry about me, right?"

"You know the answer yourself, don't you?" Lu Xudong lowered his head and kissed me who was trembling slightly, "Don't cry, okay?

He took my hand and placed it on his left side of his chest.

I pursed my lips and smiled a little bitterly, my heart was more or less warmed by his words, "I know, she drove me away today, just to see my sister-in-law make a fuss like that, she doesn't want me to continue to be caught in the house and be in a dilemma, like my brother said, she doesn't want me to be unable to raise my head in your house......"

Otherwise, my mother would not have stopped asking me to pay my salary after I got married, and she actually felt sorry for me, but she didn't want to admit it.

Thinking like this, my heart, which seemed to be torn apart by something, felt a little better.

For as long as I can remember, there have been no relatives in my family, except for my uncle's family, even my own grandmother has ignored us, I didn't understand before, I thought everyone was estranged by borrowing money when my dad was sick, and now I understand, I'm afraid there is also my grandmother who refuses to recognize my mother as a daughter-in-law.

Before my grandmother passed away, she would often come to the house to help take me, and she would often touch my hair and sigh with regret.

At that time, I was still young, and I often didn't understand why she sighed, she always said: "Child, you grow up quickly, help your mother share a little more, she is bitter." ”

When I was in Primary 3, my grandmother passed away, and my brother was in his third year of high school at that time. My mother and I were at home, and the mourners came to the house before dawn, and my mother's soul was almost lost, so she dragged me to my mother's house.

On the day of the funeral, my mother cried and fainted several times, and she hugged me and said that the only person in the world who felt sorry for her had also left her.

I was ignorant, but I understood why she said that, my uncles all complained that she was brainless, and instead of spending her whole life on our two brothers and sisters, she kept a face on her, in fact, how easy to understand, who wants to have such a poor relative, like such a drag, they must want to stay away!

From that time on, I thought that I would repay my mother well when I grew up, so even though I suffered a lot of grievances, I have been silently enduring it.

After my sister-in-law entered the door, my mother felt that it was rare for someone like us to be willing to marry, so my mother was even better to her than to my brother.

The day before I moved to the company, my mother also held my hand and said that she had wronged me, but she immediately looked relieved and said, "It doesn't matter if you move to the company, you don't live together, at least you won't have any conflicts with your sister-in-law in the future!"

The fact is that I live in the company and go home occasionally, but whenever I meet my sister-in-law who is in a bad mood, I always have to tremble, if I live at home, I am afraid that I need to worry every day.

I thought about it a lot, and I was still heartbroken by my mother's cruel and decisive words, and now I began to feel sorry for her contradictions, "She must be so sad, right? She knew that the fortune teller's words were not credible, but she did lose her husband suddenly, and my grandmother blamed her for the pain and hatred of losing her son, and it was very difficult for her to keep me at that time, right?"

"Since I was a child, she always showed that she didn't care about me, but every time I had something, she was worried about her life, you know, I was fifteen years old in the summer vacation, when I went to bed at night, I lit mosquito coils, put mosquito coils next to the bed, in the middle of the night the quilt fell a corner, just fell on the mosquito coils, I slept like a pig and didn't know anything, or my mother smelled the smoke and rushed over to knock on the door, and caught me out of bed, that little spark burned the mattress out of a corner, when my mother was holding me, the whole person was shaking. ”

Before my words fell, Lu Xudong hugged me tightly in his arms again, just like my mother hugged me back then, exuding almost imperceptible fear all over his body.

I knew that he was like my mother back then, he was afraid, and his heart was soft, he bit his lip and rubbed on his chest, "But I didn't notice her fear at all, I was so worried that I was so worried, I thought it was over, I almost burned down the house, and the next day I really beat my mother, I was very sad, and I blamed her very much, why didn't she just let me be burned to death...... I'm really stupid, am I?"

"It doesn't matter if you're stupid and stupid, you're your mother's child, and you're my baby!" Lu Xudong let go of me a little, held my face and kissed my eyebrows, and then went all the way down, kissing me like a dragonfly, and finally stopped on my lips gently.