"Give Yourself Encouragement" -

In the past few months, there have been a lot of novelties, a lot of experiences, and a lot of everything. Pen @ fun @ pavilion wWw. ｂｉｑUｇE。 info is that, something is missing.

In the past six months, there was very little novelty, very little experience, and it seemed that there was very little of anything. But something more.

I didn't have so much freedom before, and time wasn't so easy to squeeze out. It seems that every day is constantly repeating the events of the previous day, repeating the mood of the previous day, and repeating the previous day and the day before. Even so, I was able to find the time to write "The Girls I Like" and persevered in writing it for more than three months. That was the most fulfilling happiness I felt at that time! Later, I became busier and busier, and the pressure of work became more and more intense, and I continued to write "Cultivation", until I was uninspired. The heart is too tired, and the imagination is also tired. So at that time, I longed for enough freedom, thinking that if I had enough freedom, I would be very happy, and I would be able to continue writing about my things.

However, the future is always so unpredictable. Or, it's hard to predict, your own heart.

Yes, finally the freedom you want, the freedom you want. I did feel the pressure in my heart, and the joy of being at ease was really happy! The first part of the relieved paragraph, yes, very happy, yes. In the middle of the body as light as a swallow, I found that happiness was a bit empty. At the end of freedom, wake up, happy and sad. Why? Because when I have enough freedom, my unbridled heart seems to be unfettered, and I enjoy it to the fullest. Not only did the inspiration not come back, but it went farther and farther, and I couldn't find that full happiness.

Then I understood that what I needed was not complete freedom, but relative freedom. Although work is hard, it is a good way to make people feel fulfilled in life. As long as you grasp the degree of combination of work and rest.

These few months have also been my attempt on my life. I feel that there is really not only one way in life, as long as you are willing to walk, you can get out of the world you want.

I said, "Nothing is in vain." "Although I have lost a lot of fulfillment in the past few months, I have carefully dissected myself in my time and discovered many of my secrets. For example, I like to watch celebrities dance and watch a lot of videos, and I usually choose one to watch before going to bed, and only go to bed after watching it. Actually, I just like to watch the performances of those stars and feel their influence. So although I watched their dance and watched a lot, I didn't dance once. After a long time, I occasionally wanted to dance, purely the kind that danced freely. Jumping and jumping, I unconsciously danced a combination of a dance danced by a certain star and a dance danced by another star. So I wondered if my subconscious mind was always learning and improving. Otherwise, I haven't learned to draw before, I haven't painted for a long time, why did I suddenly want to paint, and I actually drew a copycat version of the sketch?

In the void, we should re-emphasize fulfillment and yearn for fulfillment. Perhaps, when I return to fullness in the future, I will be nostalgic for the freedom in vain. It's normal, like what you can't get, it's always the best. For this situation, it's good to reward yourself with a small trip once in a while.

Now, I have entered the state of job search.

The day before yesterday, in order to meet the requirements of entering a certain company, I also applied for a health certificate. I believe that I am lucky, and I believe that true luck is fearless, so I was brave enough to apply. As a result, I didn't get into that company. There are many reasons, one of which is that the technology is not enough.

When I knew I couldn't join that company, I didn't feel too much of a sense of loss. Perhaps, isn't the place where I'm really going to develop? It's not that "the grapes that can't be eaten are sour", I'm not trying to express that opinion. When things don't go the way they want them to, people feel unsatisfactory or unlucky. However, who knows God's intentions? It's like I lost my key the day before yesterday, and if I link the failure of my job application with the loss of my key, then I'm not lucky, because it's not as good as I want. However, I didn't think so, and I still believed in my luck. Sure enough, with a calm mind, I remembered that the key was not lost, but was placed in an inconspicuous place by me before I noticed that it was gone. In this case, the failure of the application does not mean that I am not lucky, but that I am lucky to get a new job search experience.

So, I have a new perspective on luck.

True luck is not fearless, but being able to transcend fear in the face of fear!

Huhu, and wrote a lot of thoughts piled up in my heart, which can be regarded as encouragement to myself!

Tomorrow will be better, may luck be with me!

"Me, Still Me" -

For a period of time after the National Day holiday, I was in a very confused state, like getting lost in a dream.

I'm looking for a job. Yes, after a three-month break, I have to work and I want to go to work.

But I was afraid. I didn't know what kind of work I could do, as if whatever I did, it was a new challenge for me. Why? Because, I really don't know anything.

Therefore, what I was looking for a job was just a feeling. It felt right, and I thought, I'll be able to work there. Like, looking for a girlfriend.

I looked for a lot of companies that I could apply for, but there were only two that I felt like.

After that, I was stuck in a state of flux. Hesitating, the shortcomings of dragging mud and water began to be exposed. Once again, I saw myself clearly. The heart is very empty! There is no feeling of work, as if the heart lacks a sense of security, and there is no sense of steadiness. When I think about the future, I feel unusually hesitant! This is the first time I have felt like this......

I found that it is not only as simple as finding a job, but also psychological. Without a breakthrough in psychology, it is difficult to reach the next growth point.

I put the most effort into the psychological aspect, but reading books could not overcome that fear, and sometimes I even messed up like a mentally ill person.

After a while, when I went to sleep, I often had dreams that felt very real. There are good and bad ones, and sometimes they are scared to the point of cold sweat.

But when I once dreamed of the girl who had a great influence on me in junior high school, I remembered what she said to me in junior high school: "I hate you the most!"

This sentence, I don't know why, always makes me wake up!

So, I immediately didn't think about anything, so I went to the interview!

I'm starting to doubt my luck. However, I like to think on the bright side, and I always feel that God wants me to do something else.

As a result, it didn't take long for my sister to give me a suggestion to learn how to sell pork.

Although selling pork is a good path, I still have a bit of a bump in my heart. Like, my heart really wants to stay here and develop. Or, because there is a "flash" there, I promised it that I would accompany it to walk around when I have time. If I go to my sister's place, I can't take it with me......

Later, a colleague from the company where I had resigned came to play with me, his name was Bobo, and he was going to appear in "Cultivation". He took many days off, and before it was time, he was bored and asked me to play.

We rode together! I even miss working with him. Phew, although a little delusional to go back and work with him, but that's impossible!

When we rode to the edge of the main square, I took off my hat and asked him, "Bobo, do you see that after I cut my hair short, is it different from what I used to be?"

While smoking, he calmly replied to me: "It's no different, you're still you." ”

I was stunned! I couldn't have imagined that he would say such a thing to me. He used to talk about me all day long. As soon as I danced, he called me a. I also talk about my bangs all day long. Ha ha!

Yes, perhaps, me, or me. What I was before, I am now. Which self am I?

And then the next day, no matter what, I had to work! I couldn't wait any longer! But my heart was full of feelings for those two companies, and the most felt thing was the first company that rejected me. So I said to myself, try again, and if you still get rejected, then go sell pork! This is what I called "confession" the day before yesterday.

By the morning of the "confession", I had almost overslept. I didn't get up until 7:40 for the interview at 8 o'clock. So, when I was ready to put on my shoes at the speed of the wind, I accidentally stepped on the Dongdong who was filled with mosquito coil ash, so the trouser legs and feet were covered with dust!

I had to deal with it a little more, thinking, "Did God really want me to sell pork?" I just got it twice, put on my shoes, and ran downstairs to let "Flash" fly me!

During the interview, the same two people who rejected me before. When they saw me again, their eyes were a little strange, and my heart was so scared! The feeling of coming to the interview for the second time was not confident at all, there was no bottom at all, it all depended on luck!

As a result, unexpectedly, I was able to enter, and the company I felt the most was entered.

I suddenly felt that the confusion of this period was worth it, and I had a feeling that my dreams had come true.

Luckily, it's always been there. But, it tells me that it is like people with courage. Rattle!

Finally, mixed feelings!

Yes, me, or me, or lucky me!