In the Mid-Autumn Festival of the forty-second year of Kangxi, the Li family was pregnant, and Yinzhen was rarely idle, and after nightfall, a family banquet was held in the house to admire the moon, which was very lively. But these are all said by Xiao Shunzi, for me, who is still in the ground, the family banquet has nothing to do with me, only the cinnamon wine, crabs and a few exquisite side dishes sent in the dining room, which are considered Mid-Autumn Festival meals.

The moonlight is just right, there are layers of clear clouds in the sky, like smoke and fog, covered in the moonlight, and the wind is filled with the fragrance of osmanthus flowers, which reminds me of the second time I sat and drank with Yinzhen.

At that time, the fifth princess died, and he seemed so cold and lonely, obviously hoping for someone to accompany and comfort him, but he kept his heart tightly locked, unwilling to let anyone touch the comfort. He is so heart-wrenching, but also helpless.

Because I understand this deep loneliness and loneliness, even if I resist such a fate, I have never complained about his ways, nor have I refused and rejected too much to enter his house in such an capacity.

It's just that I naively thought about caring for him in my way, going into his heart, comforting him, warming him, and letting him understand that I am the one who understands him, not just the kind of tool that warms the bed, pleases and reproduces.

But from his capriciousness on the first day, and his indifference to me after I was deliberately injured to appease his anger, I gradually began to give up on such thoughts, because at some point there was a confrontation between him and me that did not admit defeat.

Yinzhen expected me to bow my head to him under all kinds of pressure and tell him what a stupid decision I made the night I entered the mansion. But I have always stubbornly clinged to my pride, unwilling to bow down to it, even when I was desperate, I would rather die than wagging my tail at him and beg for mercy. He and I have been stuck like this, and it is difficult to distinguish between each other's victory and defeat, and it is difficult for each other to let go.

Doesn't he need friends? Maybe for him, only Yinxiang is the one who understands him best in this world. And his women, he doesn't need them to know too much, as long as he keeps to himself, can please him when he needs it, accommodate him, and have children for him.

But I am not such a woman, and I don't want to be such a woman, I will not lose myself for any man, even if I love him deeply. What's more, at this time, I know that it is not love, who would fall in love with a person who only exists in history and books?

Because of this, I will not be wronged to be his appendage. Maybe the real Geng would, and I—wouldn't.

But even if I think about it this way, I will still feel a little lonely in my heart, after all, for women, marriage is the destination of a lifetime, and no woman will not want a beautiful and complete relationship, and my marriage has no love from the beginning, and it will ...... Thinking of the future Nian, thinking of those other women, I can only smile bitterly - I'm afraid there will be no future.

That's it, in the vast sea of people, ask for a mutual acquaintance, I am lucky, I can't die, since I know that I can't get it, I won't be stupid to be the moth that puts out the fire, it's not worth it after all. I have been a spectator all my life, watching others cling to that string and fly a kite that will never belong to anyone.

Thinking of this, I smiled and wiped away the tears that had slipped from my face at some point, and looked up and drank the full cup of cinnamon wine.

A few glasses of wine went down, dizzy and drunk, tears could no longer fall uncontrollably, even so, still subconsciously remembered that this was the Mid-Autumn Festival and in the prince's mansion, I didn't dare to cry, I could only bury my head and sob. Wanqing didn't step forward, I don't know where to retreat, I don't know how long later, I raised my head, blindfolded and saw Yinzhen standing not far away, still standing there motionless looking at me with that familiar but unfamiliar cold face.

Mid-Autumn Festival, according to the rules, Yinzhen should be accompanying the Wulanala clan, I just said that it was a drunken hallucination, picked up the wine glass and threw it towards the face, and shouted hoarsely and chokedly: "The ghost is not gone, how can I see you everywhere, are you not enough to hurt me?" Get out, get out of the way, get out of the way the better, I don't care about your grace at all, and I don't care about dying here all my life, I want me to beg you to let go, dream......"

The wine glass fell and shattered at his feet, and Wanqing hurriedly ran out of the shadow of the tree on the side and knelt down and said: "Slave damn, let Gege get drunk, master don't be angry, I'll wake up Gege." ”

After speaking, she stepped forward to help me and shook nervously and anxiously and said, "Gege, it's the master who is here, wake up quickly......"

Actually, I wasn't very drunk, but at first I thought it was dazzling, but after those words came out, I realized that he was indeed there, but it was too late.

Wine strengthens people's courage, and he has said all the things that he shouldn't have said, and he has done what he couldn't do before, but now he is even more heartbroken, and he pushed Wanqing away like crazy with wine, stood up straight and walked in front of Yinzhen, his hand stroked the soft clothes on his body, and the corners of his mouth hooked a smile, with bitterness, ridicule and fearlessness in the smile, and said slowly in a shallow and soft voice:" I always thought that your coldness was to hide your loneliness, I always thought that you wanted someone to understand you, and I always thought that you were a good man who did not inhibit his children and had the world in his heart. But I didn't expect that I was wrong...... I'm sorry, I can't be the kind of woman you want, you can kill me or lock me up for the rest of my life, I just want to have a quiet place now, and I can find a way for these people around me to live, okay?"

Yin Zhen glanced at Wanqing, Wanqing retreated knowingly, Su Peisheng had already avoided it, and only me and him were left in the courtyard. He pulled my hand away, walked over to the table, picked up the flask, and put it down and said, "You despise being my woman so much......

I don't know how to answer Yinzhen's words, and I don't know if he can see that I am just pretending to be crazy with wine, so I simply staggered in front of him, my eyes widened, showing an innocent expression, I stretched out four fingers and shook them in front of him, and laughed mockingly: "I'm only fourteen years old...... You're twenty-five years old...... Be Your Woman...... Are you just warming the bed for a few young and childish little women? Hehehe, do you think I will despise it?"

Yin Zhen fell silent, frowned and looked at me and said at the end, exaggerating and laughing regardless of the image. His eyes were as cold as water against the background of the moonlight, which made me stop laughing, and I subconsciously lowered my head and stroked my arm that felt the cold of late autumn.

There was silence for a while, no one spoke again, and the two stood opposite each other like this. I don't like this stalemate, the atmosphere and his sharp gaze make me feel very uncomfortable, like a rabbit being targeted by an eagle, there is a kind of panic that wants to run away but is unable to escape.

"Let me go home......" I knew he had seen my deliberate gaffe, avoided his gaze, returned to his usual demeanor, and asked with a cold sigh.

"Drink two glasses with me" Yin Zhen didn't answer, but suddenly said: "It's the same as before." ”

Watching Yinzhen sit down, I stood there and was silent for a moment, and finally did not refuse his proposal, and walked to the other side and sat down under his gaze.

He handed me the flask and motioned for him to pour it. I took the flask and let the sparkling elixir pour into the glass without saying a word.

The mellow aroma of cinnamon wine wafted between the two, giving birth to a rare quiet beauty under the bright moonlight and dappled shadows of the trees, which immediately dissolved the tension of the right talent, and the atmosphere softened.

Yin Zhen drank all the wine, played with the wine cup between his fingers, and muttered: "When you are a person in the world, judge the situation, why embarrass yourself because of a moment of negative anger." Putting down your body is sometimes not admitting defeat, but for Taoguang to maintain obscurity. Burning the jade isn't necessarily the only way out, you know?"

Yin Zhen's tone returned to his usual indifferent and shallow, I couldn't understand his thoughts, but I was no longer depressed, thought for a moment, smiled lightly, didn't look at him, just picked up the wine jug and poured him another full glass, and then asked rhetorically: "Are you talking about me, or are you talking about yourself?"

Yin Zhen's expression suddenly froze, his eyebrows furrowed, and after a while, he stretched out again, and asked with a smile: "What do you think?"

"I'm not you, how can I know your mind. "His reaction has said a lot of things, but a lot of things don't need to be explained, because not everyone wants to be seen through, and he is even more so, as long as they know each other.

Yin Zhen smiled lightly, drank a glass of wine, and said, "I'll stay tonight." ”

These words came suddenly, which made my heart shake, the hand holding the pot hung in the air and paused, slowly put down the wine jug, and said calmly: "Rather for the jade to be broken, not for the tile!"

"Then give a convincing reason, don't be perfunctory, I want to hear the truth. Yinzhen's tone was still indifferent, without any expression on his face, he looked down at the wine cup, holding the thumb and index finger of the wine cup and rubbing it on the edge of the cup.

I couldn't see his emotions, and the atmosphere at this time made me calm down my emotions a long time ago. I thought for a moment and asked him, "Then let me ask you, why did you agree to admit me into the palace?"

Although he had said before that he wanted to give me peace of mind before agreeing to the Ulanala Clan's proposal, I had always felt that it was not just for this reason, otherwise he would not have connived at what the Lee Clan had done to me.

"Curious, calm, and like......" He pursed his lips and fixed his gaze on my face.

This answer made me stunned, and before I could ask, I heard Yinzhen continue: "You are a woman who I can't see through, and there is calmness, intelligence and courage that should not be at this age under the appearance of thirteen or fourteen years old...... , but sometimes reckless and straightforward but not annoying, with you, I often feel that I am getting along with someone of the same age. Every time I see you, it makes people feel different, so curious, I want to explore. ”

"With you, I will feel very calm and down-to-earth, because although you are restrained, you can make people feel sincere, you are not hypocritical, you are not pretentious, and you are a very careful person like me. I like you like this, so ......" Speaking of this, Yin Zhen lowered his head and smiled, and his face showed a touch of softness that was rarely seen.

Yinzhen is not Yinzhen, he is not a person who will spend too much time on the relationship between children and daughters, so although his tone is ordinary, it makes me feel particularly shocked, and I only feel a warmth floating in my heart, as if a night of spring breeze that melts ice and snow has swept away all the grievances and grievances in these days.

I was suddenly ashamed that I was so easily moved. It seems that she is still a woman after all, and she can't avoid being moved by such a hard-won warmth in her heart.

Yinzhen withdrew his gaze that stayed on my face and stopped talking, as if waiting for me to answer his question.

"I'm just an ordinary woman, the same as what an ordinary woman asks, you ask me why I refuse, in fact, the answer is very simple. Because from the moment I knew you were going to admit me into the house, I had been wondering why you made such a decision so easily. I know that you are not greedy for women, and I also know that there is no shortage of people around you to warm the bed, with my age, and I will not be a tool for wanting multiple inheritances, so the only possibility is to get along with each other a few times before, so that you feel that I am a person who can make you feel comfortable. You need such a person who can accompany you to drink, listen to you, and make you feel at ease and down-to-earth by your side, because ...... You're lonely. I hesitated for the last four words, but I still spoke them.

Yin Zhen lowered his head, his eyes fell on the wine cup, his fingers were still rubbing and playing with the empty cup, and he was silent without any expression.

I picked up the flask and filled it for him again, endured my shyness, bowed my head and continued embarrassedly: "Actually, what I said on the night of entering the mansion is not an excuse, and now I have to wait three months to really turn fourteen years old, and Kwai Shui has not yet arrived, if you are ignorant, let you deal with it, but since I know that this will be bad for my body, and I still let it go, I can't do it after all." “

I saw that Yinzhen's brows furrowed again when he heard this, and he couldn't help but pause slightly, and when he didn't interrupt, he continued: "You accepted me into the house because you want someone who can talk to you to relieve your boredom, and it is true to say that I also like to talk and drink with you like this regardless of identity." If I become your woman, with a different identity and mentality, do you think there will really be no change in the way we get along with each other? Of course, you are the prince, the fourth elder brother of the dignified Qing Kingdom, and you can easily get any woman you want. But you got this body, but you lost your heart. Is this what you want?"

At this point, I got up and bowed to my knees, bowed my head and said, "I have said everything that should be said and what should not be said, then let me dare to ask for an agreement - give me five years, in these five years, except for ...... I'll do what I have to do and what you want me to do. Five years later, if you still have the heart to me, I will not refuse again. ”

"No one has ever dared to negotiate terms with me, you are the first. Yin Zhen raised his eyebrows and drew a light smile. Then he drank the wine I had poured full, took a long breath, and said, "Get up, I promise you." ”

I thought he would be angered by my words, or walk away, but I didn't expect him to agree so easily.

"Go to bed early, and I'll still go to the study tomorrow to serve. I will let people talk to Chang Fujin, and in the future, you will be exempted from the morning and dusk on her side, and you will come to Zhang Luo for breakfast and snacks after nightfall, the dining room is too greasy, and I can't get used to it. Yin Zhen helped me up, his eyebrows and eyes were less sharp, and he was left soft and gratified.

I watched him walk out of the garden, warming his body and mind with the wind of cinnamon, and he couldn't help but smile on his face, and murmured to himself: "This time, did I win?"