A crossroads that you and I have

Now I will begin to write about the ordination process of this happy Dr. Haier, which will make those who go out of the school gate and into the society but wander between the temple gates have some experience, this is my wish to write this article, and it can also be said to be my wish for four years, the monk I have been looking for finally met in New York.

Getting to know Dr. Hyle was an unexpected bonus for me in New York. The first person I met that night at Dajue Temple was Haile. I was surprised by the happiness on his joyful face. The first feeling is that he is really happy, and the second feeling is that it seems that the monk really makes him happy. I immediately moved the idea of talking to him. For this reason, I said to Venerable Fa Yao: I must talk to Hai Le, I want to know how he can be so happy.

Dr. Fa Yao said: Yes, he is also a doctor.

The two doctors are in a master-apprentice relationship, but from their words they are more like brothers, and they joke with each other. Fa Yao is like an older brother, and Haile is like a lovely younger brother.

The third time I went to Dajue Temple was to meet Venerable Haile, because I was about to return to China, so I should do it as soon as possible.

I chose to go before the meditation started, and it was half past five. It was snowing heavily in New York that day, and the temperature was very low, and a lot of solvent was sprinkled on the road outside the Dajue Temple. When I knocked on the door, the door was opened by Venerable Haile, and when he saw that I didn't have the smile I had last time, he said, "Our meditation time starts at 7 o'clock." I said, "I'm just in time to talk to you before we start." He said, "Well, aren't you the one who is going to do the next Zen 7?"

I took off my coat and said with a smile: It seems that your memory is not good again. He paused for a moment: Let's go, sit over there.

I entered the main hall and saw Venerable Fa Yao sitting in a large chair. I was struck by the way he looked, because the mage was like a sculpture! And he was very tall! It was so shocking that I was so shocked that I was confused as I passed in front of him.

When I arrived at a room similar to an activity room, Haile was busy making tea for me: You taste this tea, it is Taiwanese, and drinking this tea is a bit particular, and it is a waste for us to drink it like this, but we don't have time to prepare, so let's drink it like this. Well, is it delicious?

I don't understand tea either, but I feel okay after taking a sip: good, thank you.

Haile said: I have been to Xi'an, that is, the year before last to re-walk the Silk Road, the plan was to go to Master Fa Yao, and I will go if he has something to do temporarily.

This news surprised me: Yes? Have you ever been to the Pure Industry Temple in Xi'an? Haile said, "No, I don't know about this temple. ”

"Your meditation time is almost up, so let's go to the topic so as not to delay your work. "Haile sat next to me and said, "Okay, okay.

Duo'er: You are the most truly happy and happy monk I have ever seen, and I heard that you also have a Ph.D., what made you let go of all this?

Haile: The original goal of those of us who studied all the way was to get to the highest degree, and our family taught us that. I didn't study well since I was a child, my father was a professor and my mother was a teacher in a middle school. Children in families like ours usually have to study hard, and my parents were very sad for me, and it affected my relationship with my mother until a few years ago. Later, I studied hard and won a full scholarship in the United States from undergraduate to doctoral level, and my initial motivation was to prove it to my mother.

When I finished the book, the Ph.D. followed the supervisor was **, and after searching on the Internet, you will know that he has outstanding achievements in this area. Because of the popularity of the mentor, after graduation, he successfully entered a world-renowned company, did well, and was soon promoted to the position of department head. However, at this time, when everyone thought I was proud, my anxiety and confusion came. Do I have to go on like this for the rest of my life? I also believe that if I continue to do it, I will definitely be able to achieve the highest position. However, looking at the people around me who have sat in the highest positions, working all day for these things, do I have to spend my life like them, is this my life?

When I hear this, one thing comes to mind: I must interrupt you, have you ever thought about suicide at this time?

Haile said without thinking: That's a certainty.

"Well, go on. ”

Haile: This period lasted more than half a year, and I got to know Venerable Fa Yao, talked to him a few times, accepted his advice, and whenever I had time, I would come here and attend his meditation classes in New York. However, at this time, I didn't have the idea of becoming a monk at all, and I just wanted to adjust my mentality through another kind of content that I had never been familiar with before. About three months later, Venerable Fa Yao's mother came to Yanyan Monastery to conduct a meditation session. I came to attend, and one day, before I finished my second seven, in his mother's meditation class, I suddenly had a feeling, a wonderful feeling that I can't explain to you. I decided to become a monk right away.

I don't think I'll ever experience what it was like, but I firmly believe that Dr. Haile's feeling that he could let go of more than 20 years of study must have deceived Haile.

Haile: As soon as I made this decision, I immediately dealt with the things that I had to let go of when I became a monk. I'm married, so I have to tell my wife, my ex-wife, to get her consent.

Doer: Was the process of acceptance difficult?

Haile: I should say that the time is ripe for this matter, because we don't have children, so it is relatively easy to solve the problem. She is also a PhD, we are from the same school, and she is very understanding of me. After she agreed, I left all my property to her and divorced. Then I went back to Taiwan and told my parents that the process was a bit more difficult than my ex-wife, but I finally agreed, because I left them for more than ten years to study in the United States, and they also had very little binding force on me. After they agreed, they proceeded to dispose of Taiwan's property. After dealing with these things, I quit my job when I came back, and then I became a monk, and the process of becoming a monk was as simple as that.

Doer: I believe what you say, I'll tell you......

When Haile listened to this part of my speech, his reaction was as calm as when I listened to him.

Doer: Your life should be happy now. However, the Sky Mage has a saying he always says: everything is unstable. This sentence seems simple, but it is actually very mysterious. Since everything changes, then your choice today must also stand the test of time, just as when we were studying, we never thought that when we went out into society and used what we have learned, to a position that matches our knowledge, we will suddenly feel disgusted and feel meaningless.

Haile: You're right. Maybe in a few years I'll walk out of the temple again. As 'everything is unstable', then let's live as we please. Speaking of Sky Mage, what I want to tell you is that I am only twenty-seven years old when I listen to Master Fa Yao. You better persuade him to go down the mountain, the cultivation environment on the mainland is not very good, and this is not to blame them, it is the social atmosphere that is like this, in fact, it is not easy for them, and it can only be like this in that environment.

Do'er: The Sky Mage was not impregnated by the bad habits of society, and he kept it.

Haile: I know this, and Master told me about it. Our temple is not the master who has the final say, there is a board of directors, and it is difficult to enter one person.....

When I heard this, my heart was still moved.

Duo'er: I'm not letting Master Sky enter your Solemn Temple, besides, he is already the acting presiding officer of the Pure Industry Temple. I want him to stay in the Zhuangyan Temple for a while, to communicate and learn from you, and your master is very good at studying consciousness, which is helpful to Master Sky. What's more, this is all my wishful thinking, the Sky Master doesn't know what I'm doing here, his master is also very famous in the mainland, and they are all disciples of Nan Huaijin. It's just that I have this idea from the way I learn, and the fact that your state is the best state that I think for monks, you are really happy.

Haile: I know it all, it depends on fate. I'll give you my email address. I don't open it very often, though.

Duo'er: I want to ask, how is your ex-wife okay now, what is her doctoral research direction?

Haile: It's pedagogical. We had very little contact with each other, and she was also a monk in other monasteries.

Hearing him say that, my scalp tightened. For a while, I had no interest in Haile at all, and I just wanted to leave him as soon as possible. I said after a little adjustment.

Doer: Is it influenced by you?

Haile: Not exactly. Some of her family members originally believed in Buddhism, unlike my family, where none of them believed.

Doer: It's almost time for meditation, I'm leaving.

Haile looked up at me, and we didn't say anything. Needless to say, I didn't leave his email address.

When I said goodbye to Master Fa Yao and was about to leave, I saw Dr. Haile's aggrieved gaze. Perhaps Haile will never understand why I reacted so much when I heard that his ex-wife was also a monk.

A husband and wife, two doctors. That's not all I regret.

I have always been against female ordination. If you can't live your life, you can only survive by going to the monastery, I understand, and you have a strong interest in religion. Other than that, I don't support it for any reason. Woman, it's a mother.

In addition, I also have resistance to highly educated monks. Because Dr. Haile encountered the situation before he became a monk, most people who walked out of school would have it, and how much of this confusion depends on how you adjust. I also knew that the person who finally went to the temple had a great inner struggle before entering the temple, so I asked him if he had ever thought about suicide. In other words, some people can't choose to become a monk after committing suicide (Master Tianchang once gave me that he only entered the empty door after becoming a monk). This is also the reason why parents and relatives finally agreed.

What I would like to say is that the process is actually quite short. Compared to the more than 20 years of our study, the short one is negligible. But often it is people who have been excellent in learning and pursuing perfection in character, but they can't tolerate a little 'flaw' in their living conditions, and we can't be 'rare and confused', and we would rather choose physical self-abuse than achieve spiritual perfection. We have never wasted time since we were young, and we have always been interested in learning. After learning to the top of the tower, I can't be a student anymore, and I can no longer enjoy the clean life on campus, the reality is not what we imagined, when I went to school, every day was learning. I worked, I did the same work every day, and I had complex relationships. This makes us very uncomfortable for people who have been simply learning from knowledge. Life is a kind of torment, and we can't stand the fact that our souls have nowhere to rely on.

As a result, we are depressed, struggling and hesitating, leaving us at a crossroads in life, and the person or a book that can take us out temporarily is very important. Approaching religion or choosing to become a monk is to find that the temple is the most campus-like place in society besides the school, and it is also a quiet place where 'you don't hear the world's affairs and only read the books of the sages'. We can study for a lifetime, because this study (practice) will be a lifetime, so that we can be in the learning process forever in another field, and this time the goal is more meaningful, the novel is for ourselves to 'become a Buddha and become an immortal, and not to be reborn in the world'. It can also purify sentient beings. This is a study for the benefit of the people, but also never need to graduate again, the most important thing is to be self-taught, no exams, life is single and comfortable.

Well, I would like to emphasize that this stage is something that everyone will go through. The choice varies from person to person, and I will no longer say whether it is right or wrong. I can't say that people who don't choose to become a monk and stay in reality are right, and I can't say that it is a big mistake to become a monk. Because, every choice is tough. What more could you not let go of than life?

I would like to say: everything is unstable, everything is changing, and we are living in an era of rapid change. Then you have to adapt to this change, don't go to extremes when choosing, be patient, wait a minute, wait a little longer. The power of choice is in our hands, let's not rush, don't be too anxious.

Those who choose to go to the temple should think more carefully, most of us do not have the 'accumulation' of Haile, let alone the environment of Haile, and their practice is not separated from the public, they have to give lectures in New York three times a week, and the people who listen to the lectures are people who work. Therefore, they are the ones who go ahead of the curve, that is to say, they allow themselves to dissolve into the public, to serve the public, and they are also door-to-door services. Among them, because the temples and churches in the United States are tax-exempt institutions, then they should be banned if they do not do anything to the society and do not dedicate themselves. Therefore, they are open to the public and our temple is not disturbed.

They are everywhere in the solemn temple: preaching, teaching, and solving doubts. This is also the reason why I fully accept and appreciate Haile, the monk is just that he has changed to a suitable job for him, and he has not wasted his time.

Finally, I would like to thank my monks who have appeared in my life in the past two years, because I once vowed to write a book about the highly educated young monks of Zhongnan Mountain. At that time, Tianchang said that the purpose of my writing was for one person. Actually, no, the real reason is the purpose of my inquiry with Dr. Hyle today. I want to tell those who go out of school and give back to society when they go out of school and give back to the society through a book. I just want them to understand that everyone has experienced what you have been through, and why not everyone has become a monk. I want to tell them that letting go of the idea of becoming a monk is also instantaneous. And time will tell how right it was to let go of that thought at the time.

Because, Doll also had those confusions of Dr. Haile.

Time has come to this day, and I didn't expect to accomplish my goal in New York, and in the end it was Dr. Haile who made me unload the biggest burden (life is really dramatic, the first monk I honestly befriended six years ago was also a doctor, and he was almost very different from Haile. Then my wish to get closer to the monks came to an end.

Bless to those of you who are on the path of spiritual practice, and sincerely hope that you will be happy and at ease, but do not think of yourself as different from the others.

I would also like to thank the friends who have read me write these stories, and sincerely hope that through my description, we can let people who have no religious beliefs understand the monks more, and don't add too many symbols to them, they are really not easy. Their choice is not something that anyone can do.

Finally, I would like to conclude this article with the words of Dr. Hyle, the protagonist of this article: Maybe if a year later, I go down the mountain again and continue to engage in my professional research, which is quite normal. I think you can understand that.

"I certainly understand and fully believe it. ”

Because Dr. Haile was confused when he was proud of his career, he decided to become a monk because he felt happy after participating. One day, when he returns to society, he will still be happy and have the capital to be happy. And each of us has the right to be happy, which is also capital, therefore, what kind of choice is not irreversible, but whether you still have capital.