I...... It's so hot, I'm going to take a shower, and when you're done, go back to rest first, and I won't send that. I uttered a rambling sentence and ran away from the bathroom.

I stood with my eyes closed and let the shower fall, the warm water spilled down on my face, the gravity of the water slightly hurt my eyes, and my mind cleared a little.

I opened my eyes, wiped my face, and smiled bitterly, Yu Chen, he's right, isn't it?

Xia Xi has reached the age of going to kindergarten, but because of the hukou problem, she has not been able to go to school. Although the population of City C is not very large, but the school resources are limited, whether it is a middle school or a primary school, in recent years, even the registration of kindergartens has to be assessed, and one of the most headaches for me is the problem of household registration. Without a hukou in City C, she couldn't go to school.

I tried all sorts of ways, but to no avail. After Yu Chen found out, he also helped find many people, but it didn't work, and finally he hesitated to put forward a suggestion - fake marriage. He is from City C, and his household registration is also here.

In recent years, there have been fake marriages in order to get green cards, fake divorces in order to buy a house, and I didn't expect that there were fake marriages and kindergartens.

It's helpless, but it's so realistic.

I thought about it for a long, long time, and saw Xiaoxi's eager eyes as she looked at the other children carrying their schoolbags to school, and finally I accepted this suggestion.

Since last month, Yu Chen and I have been legally spouses, although it is in name only, but he is telling the truth, isn't it, Mrs. Yu, alas, I never realized that this is my identity.

I rubbed in the bathroom for a long time, until the skin on my hands was blistered and wrinkled, and I had to come out with my neck twisted, hoping that he was gone.

Unfortunately, the gentle Dr. Yu was pouring red wine next to the wine cabinet with a gentle face. I have the habit of drinking red wine before going to bed, maybe I drank too much in the past few years, and now I can't sleep without drinking, and he knows that I have this habit.

He poured two glasses of red wine, and when he saw me come out, he handed me one with a smile, and there was no clue on his face.

I exhaled quietly.

When I first applied for the marriage certificate, I made it clear to him first, it was just a fake marriage, if he met the right person and was ready to get married, I immediately divorced him and would make it clear to his other half that this matter was purely for help, at that time he just smiled and said that I don't have to think too much.

The night breeze was cool, blowing away a little heat from the day, comfortable and soft. I stood on the balcony and looked at the black velvety night sky, starry and bright.

The night sky here is more beautiful than that of T City, it's just that I haven't seen the stars in a long time. I've been really busy and tired in the past few years, busy making a living, busy supporting myself and that little man.

Maybe it's really because I'm busy, or maybe it's just that I deliberately avoided looking at the starry sky, dotting the stars, how similar to the light in that person's eyes. When I saw the bright star, I remembered the eyes of that person.

Under that night sky, the firelight of the fireworks imprinted into his eyes, dazzlingly bright, but affectionate enough to make people willing to sink forever. At that time, I felt that if life is just an earthly firework, then love must be the brightest and most heartwarming streamer......

Many years later, when I thought back to the little bits and pieces of that year, I suddenly realized that it was really a prophecy at that time, and the streamer was always fleeting, and even if I tried my best, I couldn't keep it......

On that day four years ago, when I arrived at the airport in City C, it was still raining, and the gray sky was depressing.

At that time, I was depressed, I just felt very tired and tired, and I really wanted to find a place to sleep for a long night. I found a hotel at random, and I fell asleep after taking a shower.

I didn't sleep well and dreamed of many scenes. One moment I dreamed that Gu Feng gently kissed away the tears on my face and said, "Don't cry, I don't want to see you cry", and then I dreamed that my mother looked at me sadly, tears welled up in her eyes, and her voice was weak but firm: "Promise me to leave him." ”

When I woke up, I was groggy and had a splitting headache, the sky was not completely bright, and the city of C in the early morning was very quiet. Because of the rain, the air was a little humid and a little cold.

After a few days in the dark of the hotel, I started looking for a place to stay and a job, both of which were found quickly.

City C is a small city, not as big as City T, the consumption is not very high, but the salary is correspondingly much less, fortunately, it is enough for me to spend alone.

For the first month, I worked overtime every day, and I slowly got started and did a good job.

In the second month, one day when I was at work, I suddenly felt nauseous and wanted to vomit, I thought it was because I had eaten a bad stomach and didn't care, I drank hot water and continued to work.

The next morning, the feeling of nausea and vomiting came again, and I realized that something was wrong, and went to the pharmacy downstairs to buy a pregnancy test.

After thinking about it for three days, I finally decided to leave the child behind, and I was reluctant to beat me and his child away.

The reaction to early pregnancy is very serious, I have a bad appetite, I can't eat, I lose a lot of weight, but I can't slack off at work, once the job is gone, maybe I can't even support myself, let alone support the child.

Later, I remembered that time, so hard and tired, but I survived. At that time, I realized my mother's mood back then, the strong desire to give birth to a child who was not afraid of hardship and tiredness.

When I heard my child's first cry, I burst into tears. Through the blurred teary eyes, I saw her wrinkled pink face, long, curly eyelashes, deep eyes and straight nose bridge, all like him, but the shape of her face and mouth followed me.

She suddenly grinned and blinked, and my tears stopped, and a soft spot in my heart was gently stirred. Pulling her little hand, she grabbed one of my fingers tightly, with great force, and I couldn't help but laugh.

The doctor estimated that she had experienced a lot, and when she saw me crying and laughing for a while, she was still very calm, and quipped: "Yo, what a beautiful baby girl, it's better to be a China Merchants Bank." ”

At that time, I was hospitalized alone, discharged alone, and took care of the child alone, and when I was less than six months old, I ruthlessly weaned her, because I had to go to work after my maternity leave, and hired a nanny to take care of her.

The saddest thing was when the child was two years old, and she suddenly asked, "Mom, where is Dad?"

Where is Dad, I don't know how to answer her, I just hugged her and was silent for a long time, and finally said softly: "Dad is far away, and I can see Dad when Xiaoxi grows up." ”

The little girl opened her innocent eyes and said excitedly: "Then Xiaoxi wants to eat more, and she can see her father when she grows up quickly!"

Looking at my daughter's innocent smile, I only felt that my heart was like a knife, like being sharpened by someone with a blunt knife.

Once when chatting with Yu Chen, he talked about the incident of Xiaoxi that year, and sighed with embarrassment: "I don't know where the courage came from at that time." He didn't speak, just looked at me deeply, and his expression seemed a little sad. I laughed at him for being sentimental, and he just smiled gently, but seemed to laugh helplessly.

On the second day of coming to City C, Gu Feng made many phone calls, but I didn't answer, and posted a paragraph on WeChat, which I remember all my life, word by word, and used all my strength.

I pressed my phone word by word: "Gu Feng, I've thought about it for a long time, you and I are not from the same world, but we met unexpectedly. With you, my vanity is greatly satisfied, but I don't love you. How can people from different worlds be happy together? I feel more and more tired with you, you are so busy, you don't have time to spend with me. I just want a boyfriend who can be there for me when I need it. So let's break up. ”

After sending WeChat, I turned off my phone and grabbed my phone tightly, so that my hand joints turned white and my palms hurt. It's so hard, so painful, it's like your heart being cut out alive and bloody.

The next day, there were dozens of missed calls on the phone, most of them were his, and a few were Xiaowan's.

I dialed Xiaowan back, and as soon as she picked up the phone, she said anxiously: "Qingqing, Gu Feng has been looking for you last night, he called me and asked me where you are, I said I don't know, he didn't believe it, he came to me to look for it, and went to Ling Yusen's company and your parents' house to find you......"

hung up Xiaowan's phone, and Gu Feng's phone called. I hesitated, but took it.

"Xia Qing, where are you?" his voice was hoarse and tired.

"I'm not in T City, I've already told you to break up, don't look for me, don't bother my friends and family. I said in a cold tone.

"I don't believe what you say. Did something happen? Tell me!" he wasn't stupid, but I couldn't turn back.

"Gu Feng, I don't love you, don't you understand, why do you say you don't believe what I say!" I shouted into the phone, my tone cold and hard.

He was silent on the other end of the line, and only the sound of heavy, rapid, suppressed breathing could be heard. I gritted my teeth and hung up the phone. The screen that went dark reflected a face, dazed like a puppet, and his eyes were sad and empty.

I don't know how long it took, maybe just a short while, and the phone rang again, and I answered it in a daze.

"Xia Qing, I can't live without you, can you come back?" he said in a mournful, even humble tone.

He didn't do anything wrong, but he humbly begged me, and at that time I hated fate immensely, in fact, I hated myself the most, and hated myself for causing him harm.

I left him, without even saying goodbye to my face, cowardly as a deserter. Before the reunion, those injuries were like wounds that would not heal for years, exposed to the wind and sun, unable to scab over. And those injuries and pains, I didn't know until a long, long time.

I hung up his phone directly, blocked his number and WeChat, and when I did these things, I realized that my hands were shaking all the time, shaking like a weak patient, and I had to exert myself every time I clicked on the phone screen.

Gasping sharply, breathless, like a drowning man who had just breathed fresh air, he inhaled in big gulps, and his lungs were hot and stinging. Finally blacked out his number and WeChat and deleted, looking at the column that suddenly disappeared, I felt that something in my heart was completely broken, my head was buried in my arms, but in a trance I remembered that my foot was burned when I was three years old, and I shouted with tears in my eyes, and my mother said, well, go to sleep, it won't hurt if you sleep. I didn't know when I fell asleep, and when I woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare, my pillow was wet and the corners of my eyes were not dry.

When I woke up the next day, I was top-heavy, sick for several days, and slept in the dark of the hotel for a few days.

After that, it was time to find a job, get an interview, and go to work. In the first month of work, I was always sick, and I struggled to go to work every day.

One day, when I went to work, I had a splitting headache, and during the meeting, I watched the leader's lips open and close, but I didn't know what he was talking about.

I finally got off work and wanted to pack up my things and go back to rest early, but the leader, Manager Ma, came over and said that I had made an appointment with a customer tonight and asked me to go with me. I sighed silently, and I had no choice but to respond.

Manager Ma is in his thirties, single, has strong business ability, is a master of communication, and has heard of his brilliant achievements when he first came to the company. He was my direct supervisor and he asked me to meet with the client, and I had no reason to say no.

Chinese like to talk about business at the dinner table, and drinking is naturally indispensable for entertainment. Manager Ma drank a few rounds with the customer Mr. Wang, and they were all a little red-faced and hot. I had a headache all day and had no appetite to eat, just a few sips of juice once in a while.

Mr. Wang is in his forties, with a Mediterranean hairstyle on his head, his face is oily, and the flesh on his face trembles when he laughs.

"This ...... Miss Xia, why don't you drink?" Mr. Wang said with a smile, his eyes staring at the person.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Wang, I have stomach pain, I just took medicine, and I can't drink alcohol. I said apologetically, "I bring tea and wine to you." ”

"Hey, old Ma, Miss Xia doesn't give face!" Mr. Wang glanced at Manager Ma and said coldly.

"Mr. Wang, what's the matter, the little girl has a bad stomach, and her face is a little pale. Come on, I'll toast you on her behalf......" Manager Ma said with a smile, and drank the liquor in the glass in one gulp, "I'll do it first, you are free!"

Lao Wang snorted strangely, didn't drink, glanced at me with his eyes, and said in a mocking tone: "It's really going to pick a time to get sick...... What are you doing when you're sick, and who are you going to show when you're sick!"

I already had a headache, and when I heard this, I couldn't breathe out and couldn't swallow it in my chest, so I endured it and barely squeezed out a smile: "I'm sorry, I suddenly remembered that there was something else in the company, and I lost my company first." ”

After speaking, without waiting for their reaction, he walked out of the box with his bag.

Walking out of the restaurant, I suddenly felt dazed and didn't know where to go.

Summer in City C seems to be particularly long, the heat of the day has not yet dissipated, the asphalt road exudes a choking smell, and the air is sticky and greasy.

At the beginning of the day, this small city seems to be shrouded in a hazy circle of light, which makes it difficult to see. Suddenly, I remembered that day in Yunshui Pavilion, Ling Yusen negotiated cooperation with him, and when he raised his glass and motioned for me to come along, he said, "Miss Xia is free to do so." ”

The orange street lamps glowed and glowed, and a few flying insects eagerly pounced on the light source, so desperate that they seemed to be not afraid of being burned, and I felt very lost, I didn't know where I was, and I didn't know where the road ahead was.

That day I walked on the road indiscriminately, walking and walking to the river, my feet were so painful that I couldn't walk, I squatted on the ground, and at that moment, I felt hopeless for the first time in my heart.

The next day to the company, sure enough, early in the morning Manager Ma called me to his office, he had a straight face, counted me down, thought that today would be my last day in this company, but I didn't expect that after the number was finished, he looked at me meaningfully, telling me to do things steadily in the future, don't play temper like a child.

These two sentences revealed a little vague intimacy, and I had a strange feeling in my heart, I didn't think about it at the time, but I just felt that I was thinking too much. Later events proved that I was actually right.

This was the end of the matter, and I continued to work overtime endlessly, not allowing myself time to think about other things, and, the man......

Manager Ma's strong business ability is not only because he can drink and speak, he is also a hard-working person when he does things, and he has the most overtime hours in the department.

At that time, I also worked overtime every day, and it happened that he happened to get off work every day when I got off work.

After working together for a while, and he helped me down last time, I gradually got to know him better, and we would go out together when we got off work. He drove and I took the bus.

He kept saying that he would take me by the way, but I refused, only once, I got off work too late, and the last train was gone. I made an appointment with an online car, but no one took orders, and I couldn't see a taxi on the road.

Manager Ma drove out of the car, saw that I was still looking for a car at the intersection, opened the car door, got out of the car, and walked to me. He asked me to take his car, saying that it was also on the way, and I hesitated, and there was a car behind me honking its horn, and his car blocked a little intersection.

The horn was pressed in a hurry, and he was also a little anxious, so I had to hurry into his car.

It was quiet in the car, and he turned his head to look at me from time to time, and I had to pretend not to see it and turn my head to look out the window.

"Xia Qing, why do you work so hard? He broke the silence with a smile.

I had no choice but to turn my head to look at him, and said with a polite smile: "Manager Ma, you are too modest, I am a stupid bird who can only fly first, I am not talented enough, and I work hard to make up." ”

"Haha, I think you're very smart," Manager Ma seemed to be in a good mood, and the conversation changed, "Actually, girls don't have to work so hard, find a suitable person to marry, find an easier job, you can take care of both family and work, just let men do the things that make money, don't you say?"

He seemed to have something to say, and he heard from colleagues in the department that Manager Ma was urged by his family to get married.

I had to pretend I didn't understand, and deliberately said, "Then I have to tell my family to make more money to support me, so that I don't have to be so tired, hehe......"

He looked at me suspiciously, and said tentatively, "Are you married?" I have seen your personnel file, and it seems to say that you are unmarried. ”

I quickly reacted and laughed and said, "Not yet, I was engaged before." ”

"Oh," he seemed a little lost, and was silent for a moment, as if remembering something, and then asked, "Why didn't I see your fiancé come to pick you up from work, and is he relieved that you get off work so late every day?"

He ......," I paused, and continued to make up, "He's very busy with his work, and he travels a lot. ”

"Oh. After that, he said no more. Fortunately, it was also my dorm.

I politely thanked him, he smiled a little perfunctory, I just got out of the car, his car "rubbed" and drove away quickly. I couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief.

Later, when I worked overtime, I would not be so "coincidentally" to meet Manager Ma to get off work together, and he would not invite me so warmly to take his car, which is a good thing for me.

Fortunately, he was very public-private, and gave me an excellent rating during the monthly rating, and I got a small bonus. Later, I quickly won a few projects, and within three months, I achieved the second place in the department, and the first was still Manager Ma.

Later, I was promoted to assistant manager, and now I have taken the place of manager Ma, not because I have taken his position, but because he has been promoted to general manager.

Four years, which may sound like a long time, is broken down into 1,460 days, but each day passes quickly.

Perhaps the night is gentle, easy to arouse people's thoughts, I suddenly remembered the events of those years, such a hard few years, now looking back, and like the wind and clouds.

"What are you thinking?" a gentle voice rang in my ears, and my mind fell to the ground.

A soft thing covered my head, and a patch of white brushed my brow and cheeks, itching.

"If you always blow the wind without drying your hair, it's easy to get a headache. Yu Chen gently wiped my hair, and his tone was a little intimate, and I immediately felt quite embarrassed.

He cleared his throat in disguise, grabbed a towel and wiped it indiscriminately.

"Xia Qing," he seemed to get closer, there was a warm feeling behind him, and his shoulder was suddenly gently put on his shoulder, and I trembled invisibly, and his warm breath seemed to blow behind my ears.

I was frightened, but I couldn't fight with Yu Chen like I did with Manager Ma back then. He is such a person who is so good in appearance, ability, family background, and character that people can't find faults, and has silently taken care of me and Xiaoxi for so many years, and I have always been grateful to him, and I am willing to do everything to repay him, but ......

He turned my body very gently, approached slightly, and could smell the faint smell of disinfectant mixed with a slight smell of wine between his nose, not unpleasant, and even had a medicinal fragrance, which was completely different from the faint mint mixed with cigarette smoke that made me unforgettable.

His hands landed on my arms, and I could feel him getting closer, and I could even feel his warm snort on my face, and I froze, my hands tense as if they couldn't lift them.

Eventually, his lips were lightly imprinted on my cheeks, and I stiffened and began to tremble slightly, not afraid of him, but my body instinctively resisted, he was gentle, but I didn't know what I was resisting......

After a while, he sighed softly, let go of me, and said with a sigh: "I'll go back first, you rest early, dry your hair and go to bed again." The tone was still gentle, but there was a deep sense of loss.

He turned around, paused, and said lightly, "I'll wait for your ......"

I stayed on the balcony for a while, and when I came back to my senses, he was gone, and the night was a little darker, and it suddenly made people feel cold.

sighed lightly, returned to the room, and saw the little girl sleeping sweetly on her back, and felt warm in her heart.

The light of the table lamp was dim and warm yellow, and it emitted a faint light softly, which made people's hearts soften, and I suddenly remembered what happened when I met Yu Chen in the second year of coming to City C.