Zhou Wenhan's psychological counseling room is in a business building in the CBD, and the prime location is expensive, which shows his ability.

His intellectually elegant female assistant led me into his office.

It's bright, simple and spotlessly clean, without any fructancies. Only on the bookshelf wall on the east side, some medals and trophies are displayed.

When I first saw him, he was a gentle scholar, and his voice was steady and gentle, which inexplicably made people feel that they could be trusted.

I don't know if it's a natural career advantage for him, or if it's because he's in the industry.

He handed me a glass of warm water and smiled and motioned for me to sit down and talk.

Talking to him was more relaxed and comfortable than ever, maybe using communication skills in conversation?

We are like old friends we haven't seen in a long time, even though we don't know anything about each other's past, but we are very speculative.

Later, I realized that he had been in the driver's seat throughout the conversation, and I was guided by him to talk eloquently.

Inadvertently, I told my experience of several episodes of illness, and he listened with a slight bow and was very serious.

"Dr. Zhou, when can I start treatment?" I asked.

He smiled and said to me, "It's already started." ”

"Huh?" I was surprised.

"Just kidding. If you're ready, we can try hypnotherapy now. He looked at me with encouragement in his eyes.

I said okay, try it.

He got up, his well-tailored dark suit flattering his figure, and as he walked past me, there was a faint scent of bottom notes.

I feel like I'm also a person who pays attention to life and has quite high requirements for myself.

I followed him to another room, which was simpler than his office, the most prominent being a leather chaise longue, which I thought was supposed to be a resting place for the hypnotized.

Sure enough, he told me to lie down.

Before the hypnosis, he told me some important points, such as not to be afraid when you are in danger, to follow his call, he will guide me, etc.

I was a little nervous, and he observed it from the action of my pursing lips.

"Nervousness is inevitable, just take a deep breath. At this time, he smiled slightly, and his affirmative look made me feel trusted.

I listened to him, took a deep breath, lay down, and folded my fingers on my abdomen.

"Now please close your eyes and listen to my voice......"

In his soft, low voice, I gradually sank, and my soul seemed to wander out, searching for another dimension.

I heard a voice directing me to say, "Look for where you are at six."

"Hmm. I whispered yes.

Walking into the old yard of my grandfather's house, I saw a woman standing under a grapevine.

Her face is very familiar, and the face of my mother, which I remember for a long time, is gradually becoming clearer.

"Mommy, Mommy!" a familiar little figure popped out of the room, wasn't that me?

When I saw my childhood self, I inexplicably felt cute.

Suddenly, I somehow entered her body and felt the same emotions as hers.

I felt joy, excitement, excitement, and a desire for motherly love.

"Mommy, you're back, Mommy!" I took the woman's hand and walked into the house.

At this time, I heard my grandfather roaring: "You go! I don't have a daughter like you!"

When I heard my grandfather's voice, my eyes were hot and I almost cried, but my grandfather was still alive.

The woman choked up, big tears rolled down her white cheeks, and said, "Dad, I'll take Yangyang away." ”

"Mom, where are you going?" I reached out to wipe the woman's tears, but I couldn't reach them.

She laughed even though she was crying, and half-crouched down to let me wipe away her tears with my sleeve.

"Yangyang, mom is taking you to our house. She said to me gently, and I remembered how I shouted for my mother every day in front of my grandfather.

"Grandpa, then I'll go live with my mother for a few days and come back!" I thought it was just going for a vacation, and I didn't have the concept of leaving.

There was no movement in the house, I only took my favorite rag doll and held my mother's hand, and the excitement hung unabashedly on my face.

"Yo, Mu Bai is back. The aunt next door had a mean voice.

"Hmm. The woman walked hurriedly with her head down, her voice faintly inaudible.

"Are you going to pick Yangyang up? Yangyang, you're going to have a new father?" the eldest aunt probed and looked at us with raised eyebrows.

I looked back and proudly boasted, "I'm going to live at my mother's house!" ”

The scene changed in an instant, and I was already in an old residential building.

The security door creaked open, and I followed the woman into the house.

"Yangyang, call Dad. "She brought me to a man and I frowned because he was smoking and it smelled very bad and I didn't like it.

The light in this room was dim, and I didn't know what it meant to be depressed when I was a child, but now I feel very uncomfortable living in this small body.

Because of the backlight, I couldn't see the man's face clearly at one point.

"Scream. Mom's tone was a little anxious, and her hand nudged me lightly behind her back.

"Mom...... I...... He's not my dad. "I looked up at the woman and hugged the doll tightly to my chest.

"Cheng Mubai, it's not enough for me to raise you one, you have to raise a child for your ex-husband? Do you know that I'm bankrupt?!

Before I could react, the woman suddenly threw herself in front of me and kicked me in the back.

By inertia, we both threw ourselves backwards at the same time, and the back of my head hit the coffee table behind me, and I cried out in pain.

But in my childhood body, I was watching everything that happened in front of me with a cold eye.

Why don't I remember any of these scenes when I grow up?

"Yangyang, don't cry. The woman hugged me and whispered.

I understood that she was protecting me, but I was not moved at all.

When I saw the man's big feet fall again, I was so frightened that I immediately stopped crying.

I thought I was really smart, and I could see right away that the more I cried, the harder the man kicked him.

I was glaring at him, and he was looking at me too. His face seemed to be obscured by a black mist, and he couldn't see it clearly.

I don't want to see it clearly, it must be a devil's face.

He suddenly dragged the woman by the arm and dragged her into the bedroom, first with a terrible silence, and then with a sinister whimper.

However, after a burst of whipping, I heard the woman's wails and begs for mercy, and I could feel her little body trembling, and she wanted to run, but she was worried about her mother.

At that time, I still loved my mother.

I realized that my six-year-old self had the courage to rush into the room and shouted "No!" to no avail, she didn't understand what was going on inside.

She rushed in, and at the same time, my soul that dwelt inside her seemed to be torn apart, and memories swept over her like a tsunami, chaotic and terrifying.

That scene will never be forgotten.

The woman's fair body was covered with whip marks, and the man looked at me fiercely, and when I was a child, I only felt disgusted and frightened, and my whole body was trembling.

"Yangyang, get out quickly! Don't come in Yangyang!" the woman's shrill voice sounded......

I crouched on the ground in pain, covering my ears, and it felt like I was entering purgatory.

There seemed to be a myriad of metal grinding sounds in the brain, piercing to the point of collapse.

"Scorching sun, don't be afraid, scorching sun, take a deep breath, relax, scorching sun, come to me, I will protect you, I am Zhou Wenhan......"

When Zhou Wenhan's voice firmly crossed the waves and reached my mind, I felt like he was grabbing my arm and returning to the world from the abyss.

By the time I woke up, I was clutching his hand, my nails almost digging into the flesh.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Dr. Zhou. I quickly let go, and saw that I was covered in a cold sweat and my T-shirt was wet, and even my hair was sticking together.

Zhou Wenhan took off his coat and draped it over me, because the air conditioner was turned on in the house, and he was probably afraid that I would catch a cold.

He handed me a glass of warm water, I took it, held it, and I only felt that the water was hot, but I didn't know that it was because my palm was cold.

"Drink some water. "He sat next to me, his legs open, his elbows on his knees, his fingers clasped together on his chin, and he looked at me intently.

"You're strong. "He gave me a rating.

I looked up at him blankly, and he smiled at me.

"Dr. Zhou, why do I not remember anything that happened before?" I asked.

"Then tell me what you saw, and then I can draw conclusions. He said.

I was silent, unable to speak.

"It's okay, take your time. As I said, the premise of our treatment is that you trust me. You've done a great job and woke up when you heard my call. "He didn't show any displeasure, and I was embarrassed.

He's my psychotherapist and I shouldn't have hidden anything from him.

After I drank half a glass of water, I told the story of my dream. But in the process, I kept my eyes on the glass, not daring or wanting to look at him.

He was silent after a moment and said, "PTSD, or post-traumatic stress disorder. It manifests itself in many ways, such as re-experiencing symptoms, avoidance and numbness, increased alertness or self-harm, substance abuse, and so on. Based on your performance, there should be selective forgetting. ”

I don't understand the technical terms he said, but I can understand the last sentence.

"Today we are here first, according to your account, we have not yet found the cause of your claustrophobia. I suggest you come back next week. Well, are you married?" he asked me suddenly.

I shook my head and said no.

"Myself?" he asked again.

"......" I looked at him for some reason.

He smiled lightly and explained to me, "Because of the recovery of your memories, you have been prone to nightmares lately, and you may also remember some things from the time period before and after. I recommend that you try to be accompanied by as many people as possible, especially when sleeping. Otherwise, it will irritate you. ”

"Oh, thanks. I said to him. But I don't want to bother anyone, including Yang Buregret, and I won't tell her about this disgusting experience.

"Actually, I should say sorry to you. When I first started hypnosis, I sensed a heavy hostility in your memory, and it seemed that I didn't want to open the door to this memory. But based on your performance, I think you have a good mental quality, and your endurance and resilience are above the average person, so taking it upon yourself to take you a little further, which should have been done in the next treatment. Zhou Wenhan said, shook his head slightly, and continued: "In fact, deep in your heart that you don't know, there is still that little girl living. If you don't let her go sooner, she'll hurt you now. ”

At the time, I couldn't understand the meaning of the second half of the sentence, but soon I did.

I really don't know if it's right or wrong to take this step. If I hadn't stepped into this psychotherapy room and recovered this unbearable memory, would I have been carefree, shackled to that little me forever in the deepest part of my memory, imprisoned in the darkest abyss?

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