Li Mingchen's hand gently stroked Qi Fei's wound, Qi Fei lowered his head, and quietly looked at Li Mingchen's hand, a slender and bony hand, which he was once very familiar with, but now, he has not held it for too many years.

These hands dominated his heartbeat, and Qi Fei felt that he felt the sensation of his heartbeat again, making his breath warm.

Li Mingchen's head was a little confused, he only felt very unreal and trance-like, he hadn't been so close to Qi Fei for a long time, it was obviously just a very ordinary action, but at this moment, it felt extremely ambiguous.

Maybe it's nothing, but he doesn't like that his heart has such an illusion, because he understands that the illusion is not an illusion, the so-called illusion is just something in his subconscious, and there is Qi Fei in his subconscious.

Li Mingchen acted skillfully, and quickly helped Qi Fei change the medicine, he didn't dare to drag it out any longer, he always felt too dangerous.

Qi Fei looked at the irritability that began to appear in Li Mingchen's eyes, and the feeling that Qi Fei wanted to retreat even though his hand was not moving, Li Mingchen often had that kind of behavior and feeling whenever he denied himself.

"Thank you", Qi Fei thanked Li Mingchen when he was ready and retreated, this feeling was very strange, they didn't seem to need to be thanked between them, but they seemed to need thanks again.

Li Mingchen just nodded lightly and didn't say anything, he turned around and pushed the cart out of the ward.

After Li Mingchen left, Qi Fei put on his clothes, then stood up and walked to the window, it was another beautiful day, the weather outside was really good, which was completely different from Qi Fei's mood, but his mood was indescribable, he was between happy and unhappy, it was a very complex emotion, instinctively happy, but intellectually he understood that it was not happy.

He hasn't been like this for a long time, his heart beats, when Li Mingchen is so close to him, he still remembers, many things have not gone far, many feelings, he still remembers, these years, he still thought his heart had died of old age.

But the feeling of heartbeat made him young again, and now that he can exist so close to Li Mingchen, he should have felt satisfied, but people are always insatiable, and Li Mingchen did not appear again after leaving.

Qi Fei's change of dressing, eating, and all the problems were arranged, but only Li Mingchen did not appear again, Qi Fei was a little disappointed, but he understood that this was a natural result, it was not the past between them for a long time, Li Mingchen had already done what he should do, and there was no reason for them to be too close.

In fact, Li Mingchen didn't let him go, which is already very merciful.

In the evening, the door of the ward was opened again, and it was not Li Mingchen but Li Mingyang.

Li Mingyang looked at Qi Fei and looked at Qi Fei, who couldn't see his injury and weakness at all, and a trace of helplessness and exhaustion flashed in his eyes. He slowly couldn't tell the difference, whether he wanted Qi Fei to stay away from Li Mingchen, or wanted him to return Li Mingchen's happiness to him, as an outsider, some things, the past is the past, some things, if they are flat, they will be flattened, and some feelings are love, and if you don't love you, you don't love, in fact, it's not that complicated.

But he couldn't replace Li Mingchen's feelings with his own feelings, if Li Mingchen was really so scattered, he wouldn't be so miserable all these years, Li Mingyang moved a chair and sat in front of Qi Fei.

Qi Fei's eyes were quite soft when he looked at him, this person was never his enemy, this person was someone he should be thankful for.

Because this person has a very important position in Li Mingchen's heart, he was eager to share his inner joy with this person, and after being injured, only this person really accompanied him by Li Mingchen's side, although Li Mingyang didn't seem to have done anything, but he didn't say anything, didn't do anything, just quietly accompanied him for so many years, this is already a, the biggest credit. "It's really strange, he didn't kick you out", Li Mingyang's tone sounded a little ridiculous, but he seemed to be a little dissatisfied. Qi Fei just smiled slightly, he didn't know what kind of answer Li Mingyang wanted to hear.

"If you're well, let's get out of here", Li Mingyang's tone suddenly became a little serious, but with a hint of temptation.

If they can't save each other, at least don't be tortured by each other anymore, some things, the more they don't let go, the more difficult it is to pass, there is still a long way to go in the future, both of them are elites, they should both have a good future, have a bright future, they really shouldn't be like this, each living alone in the corner.

Qi Fei glanced at Li Mingyang, and then looked out the window again, "I don't plan to leave." ”

Qi Fei's tone was very firm, very natural, he really didn't want to go, he felt that there were some things that should be faced, facing a result that really belonged to them, whether this result was what he thought in his heart, or it could make them unimplicated, and move towards the future, although he had thought about it many times, it was good to live like this, but if Li Mingchen had a better future, he felt that he should let go and fulfill, or, is he okay, try again, and strive for it again.

"I know", Li Mingyang's expression was very serious, he looked at Qi Fei very seriously, "I know some things, I can't blame you, at least I can't blame you entirely, as far as the facts are concerned, I think your merits outweigh your faults, but you have to know that some things are very scary, you can save his life, but you can't save his heart, he hates you may not be because of his mother's business, he hates you because you killed his heart, you completely shattered his world." ”

When Li Mingyang said these words, he took out a cigarette from his pocket and lit it, " He really loved you before, but the more he loves you, the easier he is to be hurt by you, when he loves someone, that person's words and deeds, every move will be infinitely magnified, of course, the harm given by that person will be magnified many times, you may miss, but your fault is not unforgivable, although you have caused great irreparable consequences, when you at least brought it back safely, but the hurt you gave him has been magnified by him, magnified to the point that he questioned everything and feelings about you. ”

Li Mingyang doesn't know if Qi Fei can understand this feeling, Li Mingyang himself understands, because he knows Li Mingchen too well, Li Mingchen has not been so optimistic since he was a child, but he loves life, he will not compromise, from the day he knew his sexual orientation, he never thought about it, just find someone to live his life, he would rather live alone like this, he will not find a person who has no feelings, until he meets Qi Fei, everything is too beautiful, how to describe this feeling.

Just like your life, it was originally dark, and suddenly there was a person who gave you a rainbow, and then this person pushed you into the abyss again, the world is still very beautiful, but because of this person, you can no longer believe that the world can no longer stand up, can no longer believe, and no longer have expectations for love and the world.

Li Mingchen stood very tall, it seemed that his identity and status, he seemed to have stood very high, but only Li Mingyang knew that Li Mingchen had never stood up, he had been, always been, that Qi Fei pushed him into the abyss.

"I was wrong, but there is no point in discussing right and wrong, I don't know what else I can do, or what you want me to do. Qi Fei was very frustrated but also very calm, many things could not be undone, many mistakes, one wrong step, one wrong step, it was meaningless for a long time, but he wanted to redeem it, he wanted to redeem something in this matter that there was no way to recover.

He thought that his redemption and compensation was to watch silently, Li Mingchen is getting better and better, but for many years, Li Mingchen is only getting better and better on the surface, but in fact, his heart has never been better, Qi Fei no longer knows what he should do, what is good, is it like this? Or give him a good time?

He was reluctant to give Li Mingchen more pain, but he also knew that only by making Li Mingchen more painful could he really die and really turn the page, or Li Mingchen could give him a chance to lead him to believe in the world again.

Li Mingyang just shook his head and looked at Qi Fei, he couldn't answer these fundamentally unsolvable questions.

"I don't know, I don't know what to do, but I think that some things should change now, whether for the better or for the worse, in short, I think if it continues like this, he will only get more and more painful. ”

Li Mingyang knows very well that some things should change, but he really doesn't know what to do, and he doesn't even know why he is here today, since the day Li Mingchen returned to Li's house, Li Mingyang has witnessed with his own eyes that Li Mingchen's loneliness all the way can really only be described as loneliness and loneliness, as well as the pain that is hidden.

At the beginning, he believed that time would smooth out many things, and he also believed that Li Mingchen would truly face the world again, but time has passed for a long time, and Li Mingchen has just fallen deeper and deeper.

He was completely silent in his pessimistic world, his heart no longer saw the sun, and he just had to live a life.

If there is anyone in this world who can save him, then this person must be Qi Fei, Qi Fei can once again hold this world in front of Li Mingchen, so that he can once again feel the truth that this world still has, if he is willing to accept it. Of course, if Li Mingchen is always unwilling to accept it, Qi Fei can also completely kill Li Mingchen's heart, and only when he really lets his heart die can he come back to life again.