June 8, 2008 after the high school graduation party, late at night. Pen, fun, and www.biquge.info

…… "First Blood 4" is playing on TV , Stallone, who was agile back then, is now old, his out-of-shape figure shows his fatigue, the sharp saber has long been gone, and he can only slaughter all the worst with a gun, no one in the hall speaks, only the fierce gunfire on the TV, the hustle and bustle In this silent night, I turned my head to look, Yun'er and Duoduo's figures showed a hazy silhouette in the dim corner, only their bright eyes made me feel their presence, I was relieved again, turned my head to look at the sofa, Ah Xin and his friend were sitting on the sofa on the other side, staring at the TV intently, the cigarette butts at the corners of their mouths flickered on and off, and from time to time spit out puffs of gray smokeThe curtains behind them were only half drawn, and through the window you could see the dark night sky outside the window, there were no lights under the night sky, it was already very deep, the city was already asleep, I don't know how the other students spent this night under this night sky?

"Ah Xin, we want to sleep. At this time, a lot of voices came from behind him.

We turned our heads to look at Yun'er and Duoduo at the same time, "You guys can sleep in our room!", Ah Xin stood up and pointed to the room opposite the bathroom.

"Well, thank you!" Duoduo and Yun'er nodded politely, then waved at me, "See you tomorrow." I smiled and nodded.

Yun'er and Duoduo closed the door after entering the room, there were only 3 people left in the hall, Ah Xin's friend handed me another cigarette, I took it and lit it and smoked it, I have never smoked so much in one night, the whole hall was filled with smoke, mixed with the never-ending gunshots on TV, a sense of sleepiness gradually crept up in my heart, I understood that this was caused by drinking at the graduation party in KTV a few hours ago, but not taking a bath made me feel extremely uncomfortable, I don't know how long it took, the gunshot in my ears gradually became hazy, and it came from another time and space, and I slowly fell asleep。

Vaguely I dreamed of Dan, she also graduated today, but I don't know where she is now, in fact, everything about her, I have long been unable to understand, there are memories about her, all stopped at the first few months when I first came to this city, at that time I was surrounded by strangers, I thought about her on the other side of the city in class and class, three years later, I am surrounded by good friends, she is also familiar with this strange city, maintaining those new friendships......

When I woke up, the hall had already fallen silent, Ah Xin and his friends had already fallen asleep on the sofa, I turned my head to look out the window, the sky had begun to white, I gently walked to the bathroom, washed away the tiredness with cold water, felt much more sober, walked out of the bathroom, looked at the opposite door, it was still closed, Duoduo and Yun'er must still be in a dream, they are going home today, and they may never see them again. I walked back to the couch and lay down, stroked my wet hair, closed my eyes and rested between sleep and wakefulness, the faint sound of cars outside the window, the new day began, the city began to work again, even the suburbs woke up......

Afternoon of 9 June 2008.

...... sent Duoduo and Yun'er to the car, I went back to school, the whole school was quiet, they all took their luggage home, the school has never been so quiet, the sky is raining, the ground is damp, my 18th birthday is full of such a parting, back to the dormitory, there are only Li Linquan and Yang Wenfei left, everyone else is gone, Yang Wenfei is sleeping on the bed, Li Linquan is packing his luggage, the big bags and small bags have been sorted out almost, the dormitory is messy, there is garbage everywhere, just like we came here three years ago, when we cursed the seniors of the previous session, I think the next generation of juniors will curse us when they see such a dormitory。 I walked into the dormitory and said hello to them, Yang Wenfei didn't respond, he should have fallen asleep, Li Linquan looked at me and said, "Good friend, I'm leaving." After carrying the luggage towards the outside of the dormitory, he carried the luggage figure at the door to form a silhouette, I recalled the "good friend" he said just now, this is my nickname, I don't know what day this nickname was formed, what kind of story happened during the period, I only know that this is my nickname, they usually call me that, after graduation, no one will call me a good friend!"Which of you has three yuan change?" Suddenly, Li Linquan turned around and asked, I smiled and took out three yuan to him, "Remember, this is a loan to you, and I must repay it! I will not forget this debt for ten or twenty years!". Li Linquan took the money, walked out of the bedroom, and looked back at me and the sleeping Yang Wenfei at the door, and looked at it for a while, as if he wanted to say something, but in the end he didn't speak, and turned around with his luggage.

The dormitory suddenly quieted down, there was no sound, I stepped on the garbage all over the floor, walked to a bed next to me and sat for a while, this bed is Fan Linfeng's, but it has long been empty, only a few planks are left, I sat on it, suddenly felt very tired, sat quietly for a while, there seemed to be a joke in my ears from yesterday, who likes that female classmate, which class is really beautiful, and what new games have come out recently, their expressions seem to be still vivid, but who said what is there is no way to verify。

I cheered up and took a cold shower, the cold feeling rushed on my body was extremely comfortable, the time I washed in the morning was still a little cold, this time, the same cold water, but it brought a different feeling, just like Li Linquan's last "good friend", I usually don't feel anything when I listen to it, but the last time, I can't describe that feeling. After taking a shower, I lay in my bed, I had not slept peacefully last night, I was tired, and now I fell asleep as soon as I put my pillow on.

Vaguely, I seemed to dream of Yang Wenfei and what he said to me.

After a long, long time, I woke up, the bedroom was quiet, it was quiet like I had never been there, like being in a forgotten room, blocked for thousands of years, I turned my head to look at Yang Wenfei, his bed was already full of wolves, I don't know when, he had already left with his luggage, I remembered the dream I just had, it turned out that it was not a dream, but Yang Wenfei was saying goodbye to me, but I was sleepy and hazy, thinking it was a dream.

I was the only one left in the dormitory, even my own heartbeat could be heard, when Yang Wenfei left, the door was closed, the bedroom was dim, I looked out the window, it was still raining, the sound of rain was blocked by the door, could not come in, in the dim I climbed up, sat on the mat, quietly in a daze, it seemed that I had taken a nap for a long time, and I would have the habit of being in a daze after getting up, there seemed to be more garbage on the ground, I saw a fantasy novel under Yang Wenfei's bed, I used to go to the bookstore next to the school to rent books to read, and I would go after school every afternoon, stepping on the sun, holding a few books, and slowly returning to school, and then read quietly in a classroom with only three or two people, indescribably comfortable. After graduation, the bookstore's membership card was useless, so I simply didn't even return the books.

There are times that are really hard to imagine, and this is the end of it.

I got up, opened the door, the light returned to the dormitory, I slowly packed my luggage, walked out of the dormitory and looked, the whole apartment building has been empty, it seems that only our dormitory, only I haven't left, standing in the corridor and looking down, the tender grass in the small garden is getting more and more fresh, countless classes, I passed here with a bucket on my back, and then lay on the grass to sleep, looking at the blue sky and listening to music, until the end of class before carrying the water back to the classroom, the teacher saw that I was carrying the water hard, it was not good to investigate my absenteeism, countless classes were absent in this way。 I climbed to the top of the apartment building, the roof was wet, I looked at the water tower, many nights of self-study before the college entrance examination I sneaked out of the classroom, back to the apartment building, climbed this water tower, looked at the city below and the starry sky above the city, this small place is my kingdom, the king is me, I watched the lights of the city above, and the people below the lights hurried by......

After that, this place will not belong to me.

The rain subsided a little, I went back to my dorm room, took out my luggage, closed the dorm door one last time, the echo echoed in the empty apartment building, I looked up at the apartment building, I never felt that it was such a tall, silent and deserted campus, how to miss it.

I didn't go through the big gate, but left the school through the back door. I vaguely remember when I was a freshman in high school, I often went out at sunset, went out to the nearby post office to send letters to Dan, and then stepped back to school in the afterglow of the sunset, next to the post office is the bookstore, the opposite of the bookstore has breakfast, and then turns around the Internet café, the life circle of high school is so narrow, but full of human touch, a little smaller is better, don't have to go too far, don't take too long to get acquainted. When I passed by the breakfast shop, the owner greeted me: "Xiao Huang, are you leaving?" I nodded, the owner of this breakfast shop is very good, many times I owe breakfast here, and I will pay after a few days. The boss is still busy, when we go, there will be new guests, in front of the Tianwangtong Internet café, the Internet café is still lively, the younger students are playing some new games, I suddenly remembered, it seems that my membership card has not been used up, I knew that the last time I went online, I used up and left, but when was the last time I went online? How do I know that it was the last time I was in the Internet café?

I barricaded a car and sped towards the city's station, familiar scenes whizzing by, almost everywhere in the city with my footprints. It turns out that the city is so small, when I first came here, I was too young and felt that it was too big, when I left here, I had grown up, but I felt that it was too small, and I wanted to go to a bigger place, such as Changsha, and one day, when I felt that Changsha was too small, I would go to Shanghai, and when I felt that Shanghai was too small, I might not have the strength to go to a bigger place......

In September 2008, the university opened.

I went to Changsha alone, took the car alone, took the luggage alone, found the location of the school in the huge Changsha, paid the tuition, in the unfamiliar dormitory, their parents were helping them fold the quilt, I asked the name of the person next to me, he said his name was Zhimin.

On January 9, 2009, he returned to Yizhang for the first time after university.

I met Yun'er, she became my girlfriend that day, and the next day we broke up, and after that, I never saw her again.

December 2010 was the last winter of college.

Zhimin asked me if I would be looking for a job in Changsha after graduating in two months, and I looked at the misty east.

Changsha is too small, I will go to Shanghai.

2010.12.03