Foreword: Thirty-one years later, on the same day, I coincidentally encountered this diary, which is really not deliberate, this is an arrangement in the dark, in fact, this arrangement started yesterday, but I didn't pay attention to it yesterday, and I inadvertently chose the same day, thinking of transferring the previous handwriting to the Internet, and the middle thirty-one years, the changes have not gone to the sea.

It was written during this period of '81, when I was 14 years old, and what I wrote was what I really thought, and I obeyed the will of my parents (or teachers), although I decided that it was not my fault, I still wrote a review to get myself out. As a landlord cub who was incompatible with the world, from the first day of school, I understood that obedience was my way of survival. At that time, even if a middle school student had great skills, it was impossible to portray himself, so how could he know himself correctly?

[November 26, 1982 (cloudy to rainy)] The following transcription of this review book, I wrote it last year, just a few days after it was written, Yuan Shiping wanted to grab it to read (I already had a small number of die-hard fans in junior high school, every time I wrote a little text other than homework, someone snatched it to copy) and robbed it. So I forced him to copy a copy of it for me. He took it, but he didn't copy it, and I didn't expect that on October 22 this year, he returned this review book to me, and of course I am grateful. Although the paper has been divided, it is not damaged word for word, and it is copied below (it is my turn to copy it obediently) to encourage myself:

On a winter night, when everything was silent, I sat in the dim light with the 'trauma of a hero', bowing my head and thinking bitterly. It's a pity, a junior high school student, it's this stinky temper. (Copy the original text, there are also valuable points.) Anything belongs to the Gang of Four!) hateful, what is it that makes me like this? so hateful, hateful! Not to mention those sad things, it will make me desperate, humble. What is the dust at work? What is it? The harsh facts make me have to think, I have to think.

Last night, my father came back from Hefeng Middle School to learn about my brother's (study and life), and he was very satisfied with his brother's virtue. In response to my question, my father called me to his side and said to me, "Yueping, I see that your virtue is very bad, and if you are right, you will beat and scold your sister for uniting with your sisters, respecting the elderly, and being filial to your parents, which is the virtue of a teenager. A person is never obedient and goes to the bad side. You have to learn from your brother, who unites his classmates, respects the teachers, and collects money, and is not only praised by all the teachers, but also by the students at the school. Take my words to heart and learn from people with good morals. Do you know how much effort your parents have put into teaching you well!" "Yes, I know, because my parents have taught me many times that it is ineffective, my parents do not eat well, sleep is not sweet, and I am worried day and night, and my parents' faces are pale and their eyes are deep-set. However, I didn't think like this at the time, I wanted to beat and scold my sister (and I was not lenient with others), and I didn't unite with her. But none of the students in our class were good with me! can it be bad? I don't believe it's dangerous.

At noon today, I scolded my sister again, my mother persuaded me next to me, not only did I not listen to my mother's words, but also my mother said a sentence I would return three sentences, and finally I couldn't help but scold my sister, hiding on the side to listen to the father for a long time, I was angry with my father, and taught me a hard lesson, I was hurt (more than ten times more painful than I beat my sister, he taught us like this, we have the same example) scalp, only then did I have an understanding, and began to reflect on myself and dissect myself.

In my body, there is a disgrace in the prosperity, I never work seriously, I don't study seriously, I am not polite to my teachers, I am disrespectful to the elderly, I am not united with my sister, I think about how I can play well, how easy my parents tell me to do things, I will be a 'commander'. Supervise my sister to do it, and whenever something doesn't go well, I scold my sister, which is simply unhearable, and others can't hear it. If my sister retaliates, she will play hard during the day and sleep at night, so that my temper will become worse and worse, and I will become what I am now—these are my sinful bad habits. No, there's more than that, there's many, many, and I'm too embarrassed to say any more.

I made up my mind privately to get rid of bad habits, abandon darkness and regain light to become a good person, greatly change morality, work hard, study with an open mind, unite sisters, respect teachers, listen to my parents, and learn from my classmates who are morally, intellectually and physically good - dear parents, please watch the after-effects. (In good conscience, even then I was the best-grumpy, most honest, open-minded, polite, and hard-working man I had ever met, and I was not a commander.) ）

Original text: This confession remains unchanged except for the correction in the painting (). It's ridiculous to confess like this, but I also see that I was a year ago, naïve and ridiculous, (but thanks to a year later, I'm much more mature.) But I'm not so bad in the confession, in fact, I always consciously keep doing housework, but my sister is not sensible and can't move repeatedly, so in addition to the liver fire, naturally I hit one or two times without heaviness. It's just that at that time, in order to explain to my father profoundly, I deliberately spoke very badly about myself. However, copying this confession naturally caused me to have to sketch these characters. And since one of the main purposes of writing a diary is to explore the details of people's lives and inner worlds, I will devote myself to writing about family life in the future, (my family is the mainstay), and my school life has to be omitted for a while.