There are 30 people in the class, and my grades have always been in the upper middle and upper middle. Every time my mother chatted with someone about her child, she inevitably talked about her academic performance, and although my grades were not a shame, they did not make my mother look glorious in front of others when she talked about it. has always been mediocre and mediocre.

In addition to class, I slowly became familiar with the environment and my classmates. The classmates played together, and there were a lot of girls. At that time, there was not such an open social atmosphere as now, and everyone cared about what other students said and pointed out, so most of the boys were with the boys, and the girls were less together. And it's like a river between boys and girls. During that time, I forgot about the gentle teacher who gave me make-up lessons. But that afternoon, when I entered the school building, I saw my tutor. She was dressed in shiny, loose brown trousers, and her hair was still jet black and straight. She walked downstairs, her head down, her hands rubbing her eyes as if she were crying. I looked at her from afar, her walking back gave me a strange feeling, weak and aggrieved, now I think about it, I was small at that time, I actually tasted a strong heterosexual atmosphere, femininity.

When I got home, I told my mom what I saw and said she seemed to be crying. Mom gave a simple hum. While I was sleeping in the house, I vaguely heard my mother telling my father that the man was bullying her and had no conscience.

In the class, those who are good-looking and study well tend to get more attention from teachers and classmates. And people like me are the kind of people who see in the shadows under the light. I am very envious in my heart, and sometimes I am very happy to be able to get attention from foreign appearances. I remember one time, the teacher asked, who knows what to do if the oil in the pot is on fire, and the students who know can raise their hands? "Tell me, classmate. "Teacher, if the oil in the pot catches fire, it should be covered with a lid. "Well, that's right. The teacher said, and then said to the class: "Remember, students, if the oil in the pot is on fire because the temperature is too high, do not use water to extinguish the fire, that will only make the fire stronger, and it is easy to burn. "Why do I know, because my mother once cooked vegetables and then forgot about it, and when I realized it, there was a fire in the pot, and my mother panicked and closed the lid of the pot, and then the fire in the pot went out, and there was a lot of black smoke, of course, the pot was wasted. At that time, after answering the questions, under the eyes of the whole class, I was a little overwhelmed and didn't dare to show it.

One afternoon after school, our homeroom teacher asked me to stay. After the head teacher said something trivial, he asked me to give him a bottle of soy sauce. Then I took the black soy sauce bottle and went off to the. When I went home after I was done, my father was waiting for me and asked me anxiously, "It's already been school for a long time, what are you going to do?" I said, "The head teacher asked me to give him a bottle of soy sauce, and I went to get a bottle of soy sauce before I came back." Dad said, "If he tells you to go, you will go!" I only feel aggrieved in my heart. Mom said next to her, "What a stupid boy, your dad is worried about you." "What are you worried about, worried that I'm lost? No, I thought.

Getting attention isn't just about getting the good stuff, but it's still about getting that feeling.

The town is located in the south of Shanxi, a ravine stretches east and west, and we all live in the ravine. There are more grasses and trees in the mountains to the south, and the mountains are overgrown with wild grasses and rocks, and there are some trees growing sparsely and sparsely. We call the mountain to the south the mountain. The mountains to the north are typical of the Loess Plateau. There was not even a stone on the mountain, the whole mountain was bare, and under the sun's rays, the mountain was yellow and shining. The former cave was built at the bottom of the South Mountain slope, and the current living bungalow is on the North Mountain slope. From Kitayama to Nansan, you just pass a small stream. To the north, the whole mountain was formed into a stepped pattern, and the relatively flat land that was reclaimed by man would be planted with wheat or millet. Because there are few stones, the soil is easy to dig, and there are many holes and holes on the mountain.

After the students got to know each other, on Saturdays and Sundays, they all went out to play together. There is a leader in every class, and the eldest brother in this class is definitely not what he imagined, the one who is tall and strong is the eldest brother. They are generally of average size and body shape. In the first class of the second grade, Jia Rudao is that person. Jia seems to be this guy, he doesn't look very flamboyant, the kind of person who is sharp. The temperament is also mediocre when interacting. But Niu Xiaoyu, the strongest and tallest in the class, was willing to listen to him. This kind of thing is always unbelievable. When everyone plays together, there will always be someone who becomes the leader of everyone, what to play, how to play, where to play, etc. From the beginning of a few people, Jia Rudao only discussed and talked, once or twice, and slowly got used to letting him say and decide. Later, there were more people, and the habits of a small group of people influenced the habits of more people later. So the circle between friends was formed, and this circle is also divided into inner and outer circles. If a child is not social, or offends someone in the circle, the child will keep the people in the circle away from him, and then he will be isolated. This kind of isolation is cruel because no one pays attention to you, and many children apologize or do something else because they can't stand the isolation. And people in the circle can also feel that isolation when they see this. When you don't like something, you make decisions that go against your heart in order not to be isolated.

These things, from the beginning to the happening, the whole process is confusing, I don't know why. Maybe it's because of the environment, because it's the influence of society, but more perhaps, that human nature is that society.

Sometimes, I don't know why, and I'm isolated. This kind of thing happened to me, and inexplicably, my classmates who were all together suddenly ignored me. Until one time, I saw Jia Yidao and Niu Xiaoyu talking about something at the door of the classroom. Niu Xiaoyu said, "Then what should he do?" Jia Rudao said with a strange expression: "Forget it." Then he said something to some of the students around him. Then two classmates came out and said to me, "Go to the toilet, do you want to go together, Li Yunlong?"

If you have nothing to do and then have a problem, everyone has been together for a long time, and there will be a lot of moths that have not been played. It is also what to learn, mostly influenced by parents and some people around me.