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Xu Shenlin said that after my father disappeared, he used to wander the street begging, and the tourists on the street would occasionally throw him a little food, and he would eat a little casually.

Every day, he huddled in front of a tobacco shop, where the owner was afraid of affecting his store's image and business, and beat and scolded him several times.

My dad didn't know what attachment he had to this shop, no matter how others beat him and scolded him, he lay there and never left.

Over time, my dad had been begging on the streets, and he didn't know how to buy anything when people threw him money, so he just huddled there and watched the streets come and go all day in a daze.

Every day, all the money given to him by others was robbed by pretending to be beggars, and he didn't know how to protect his own interests, and when no one gave him anything to eat, he rummaged through the trash can and stuffed himself with things that others didn't want.

Until one day my dad was leaning on the side of the tobacconist as usual, and was drowsy, when suddenly there was a coin sound from the ground, and when he looked up, he saw an old woman who was also begging on the street to pick up mineral water bottles.

That person was the old woman who had been taking in my dad since then, and her name was Tan Qiuju.

She was a lonely old man, her son was drowned in a flood when she was 50 years old, and her wife died of a serious illness when she was 30 years old, and there were no relatives or friends willing to help her.

After so many years of begging and picking up garbage on the street, she also felt pitiful for my dad, so she gave my dad all the only three yuan she earned from selling drink bottles that day.

But my dad mistook her for my mom, and since she lost the three dollars coin, my dad has been following her and calling her Lee An-jin wherever she goes.

Probably a lonely person has been lonely all his life, although at first I tried many ways to get rid of my father, but seeing his pitiful appearance, I finally took him in at home and took good care of him.

Everyone in the village knows that there is a widow here who took in an old man, and for a while became the laughing stock of the whole village, if it weren't for Xu Shenlin's last time at a charity dinner, he allocated funds to build a hope primary school in the village, and after the money was allocated, Xu Da got Xu Shenlin's order to be afraid that someone in the middle would fill his pockets and have been personally supervising the work here.

I stayed for almost a month, and I also went to collect and inspect materials once in a while, and listened to the joking tone of the workers on the construction site here.

He was also curious at first, and finally once Tan Qiuju took my father to the construction site to pick up plastic bottles and iron nails on the construction site as usual, and was bumped into by Xu Da, so he reported it to Xu Shenlin.

Xu Shenlin came quickly, and after confirming that it was my father, he planned to give Tan Qiuju a sum of money and then take my father away, but he didn't expect my father to be quite noisy on the way away, and he ran out uncontrolled several times.

Xu Shenlin didn't dare to be forced, and kept letting Tan Qiuju take care of her there, only occasionally sending her something, and she didn't want to give her money, just said, although I don't have a son and an old man, I still have myself, I beg, but every one of my payments has a background, and I never get it for nothing.

Xu Shenlin felt that this old man was very arrogant, so he has been letting her take care of my father until now.

Until today's twenty-sixth birthday, he asked Xu Da to prepare early in the morning, but he didn't expect Du Xiaolan and they happened to come on my birthday, so it has been delayed for so long.

When the two of us stood at the gate, neither of us went in, and the old man came out of the kitchen with the water in the cup in his hand and staggered out of it, kicking and staring on the bluestone floor with a stick in his hand.

She looked up and smiled at us, her face was full of traces of time, some pale eyes but very energetic, just while feeding my dad rice in a village accent, the old man now wants to eat every night, I don't know if he is hungry and afraid, I have no way I can only make it for him every night, it is not delicious, he likes to eat light, but my former wife likes to eat a little more flavorful, so many years, the practice has long been changed, in addition to blindness, bad memory, the dish put a spoonful, and a spoonful.

She shook her head, the wrinkled dark skin on the back of her hand showed old age spots in the warm yellow light, she shook her hand at us and said, people are old, a lot of things have been returned to their parents, yesterday I went to buy vegetables and was deceived by others for four yuan, today I can only eat porridge and pickles, fortunately the old man eats everything, and he is not picky.

After she finished speaking, she squinted her eyes and fed my dad a spoonful of rice, and slowly picked up the towel on his chin to wipe his saliva, and said, you eat slowly, no one will rob you.

My dad grinned at her.

I stood there and suddenly I couldn't improve by half a point, and I whispered to Dad, he didn't know me.

Xu Shenlin was on the side to help me, the old man wiped my father's mouth and looked at us, and said, I know you are going to take him back now, it's okay, it's hard to follow me, I'm also used to it, one more person will have one more pair of chopsticks, one less person will have one less pair of chopsticks, this is nothing, but I'm afraid he won't get used to it.

As she said this, a layer of water flashed in her pale eyes, and she didn't know if she was afraid that we would see it, so she immediately turned her face and wiped the vegetable leaves left on the mouth of the cup with a water cup.

I stood there and didn't move, Xu Shenlin took me to approach the old wooden table, I immediately grabbed him, and whispered, let's go, it's good.

Xu Shenlin seemed to understand what I was thinking, and paused, he and I stood there and watched Tan Qiuju feed my father, until he finished a bowl of rice and saw us standing there, so he stood up and stretched out his hand to make a gesture to drive us away, because his body movements were uncoordinated, and he looked very stiff.

I stood there and watched him keep making gestures to drive us away, and he seemed to have a premonition of something, and he began to get very emotional, and when he saw that we were not leaving, he kept standing at the door and making a lot of noise.

Tan Qiuju came over to appease him, and my father said vaguely, they, the robbers, will beat people, so get rid of them quickly.

He bent down and picked up Tan Qiuju's stick and was about to hit me, Xu Shenlin protected me, and the stick hit him lightly or heavily.

When he said such a sentence, I burst into tears, but I could not say anything.

In order to prevent him from getting emotional, Xu Shenlin and I finally withdrew from the bungalow, and the door was closed.

The middle of the night in the village has always been a quiet beauty, and the sky is extraordinarily empty, and in the middle of the night the warm yellow lights of the village begin to go from house to house, except for the last light of the bungalow behind us, which began to die silently a few minutes before twelve o'clock.

Xu Shenlin and I did not leave, but sat on the high stairs at the gate, the night breeze outside was cold, and I felt that the tears on my face had been quickly dried up by the wind, forming a tingling and tightness on the surface of the skin.

The village, surrounded by mountains and rivers, finally fell into a quiet sleep.

Xu Shenlin sat beside me and didn't speak, quiet and peaceful.

I kept covering my face until I felt that I couldn't shed tears in my eyes anymore, so I raised my face and cleared my throat to stand up from the class, and said to Xu Shenlin, let's go.

Xu Shenlin asked, don't take him back.

I shook my head and said, isn't he very good now, although he doesn't have my mother around, but he thinks my mother is right next to him, and if he takes him back, maybe he's not as happy as he is now.

Xu Shenlin nodded, then got up and held my cold hand, his hand is very warm and wide, the palm is soft but there are some hard calluses between the fingers, it should be caused by holding the pen all year round, there is no pampering as I imagined, he whispered softly in my ear, such an ending is indeed very good.

I don't know whether it's comfort or sighing, such an ending is really good, if a person can't accept a person's death, and sleeps in a dream, and feels that everything is still there, not completely desperate, at least he still has nostalgia, although it is an illusion, but in the illusion he thinks it is true, and it is not a good thing to live in confusion.

Naturally, he didn't have to endure the feeling of despair like I did.

I'm just a little guilty, in the last years I personally handed over my dad to another woman, although she is no longer in this world, and I don't know if she laughed at this result or scolded me for being confused.

I let go of his hand, wiped the sweat from my palms on my clothes, and said with some guilt that I didn't fulfill my promise to my mother, that I couldn't take good care of him, and that I lost him.

Xu Shenlin said that now is the best care for him, and the care we think is torture in his eyes, maybe what he wants is different from what we think.

He has never been a person of many words, but he can point out the core every time, he said this sentence lightly, I suddenly felt less sad in my heart, as long as my dad thinks all this is good, I will not break all this, let him live in an illusion, not lonely, someone to accompany him, I think, this is the best care.

But I'm still sorry for my mom after all.

Thinking like this, I paused, stood behind Xu Shenlin and said softly, Xu Shenlin, thank you, thank you for all this for me.

He stretched out his hand, his eyes flickering in the night, stretched out his warm big hands, I seemed to understand his subconscious movements, walked up to him, put his hand in his palm, he contracted his palm tightly wrapped my hand......

I was led by him, watching his long legs painted on the bluestone slab, I followed him step by step at each of his footprints, looking at his tall back like a big tree standing beside me at any time, I smiled and said, if you are old, recognize other old women as me, Xu Shenlin, I will not forgive you.

He smiled heartily and said, Isn't it good to remember only one person?

I shook my head and said, it's not good at all, because the person who is with you is not me.