Xiao Zihua felt something different and turned around. The two of them looked at each other www.biquge.info the pen "Fun", and Chen Yuxin suddenly woke up that there should be no such behavior between them. But she just lowered her head shyly, and did not mean to back down. At the moment she didn't want anything, she didn't care about anything, just waiting for him to stretch out his arm and gently take it over, and she would snuggle up in his arms......

However, what she got was Xiao Zihua's soft reminder: "It's not early, I'll send you back." Chen Yuxin trembled as if he had woken up from a dream. She really didn't want to say goodbye to this good time so soon, so she said softly, "Can you write me those two lines of poetry you just read?"

Xiao Zihua took out a pen and a small book from his pocket, wrote the two lines of poetry in the notebook, and then ripped off the page and handed it to Chen Yuxin. Chen Yuxin took the note and held it in the palm of his hand, and then meekly followed Xiao Zihua to the dormitory.

When he arrived at the door of the dormitory, Xiao Zihua stopped. He said to Chen Yuxin: "You go in, I'll watch you go in here." Chen Yuxin still meekly said "um" and walked gently towards the dormitory. Walking to the door of the dormitory, Chen Yuxin glanced back at Xiao Zihua who was standing there, and then pushed the door in.

The lights in the dormitory were bright, and Qin Lei was sitting on the edge of the bed looking in the mirror. Seeing Chen Yuxin coming in, Qin Lei immediately asked knowingly, "What are you doing?" Chen Yuxin also pretended to be relaxed and said, "I didn't do anything." Qin Lei said: "What are you doing without doing?" Chen Yuxin knew that he couldn't hide it, so he had to say: "I'll send him a manuscript." Unexpectedly, Qin Lei said again: "He, who is he, why is he so affectionate!" Chen Yuxin blushed when asked, and rushed up and beat Qin Lei. At the same time, she said: "Little girl, you just have itchy skin!" Qin Lei dodged and said at the same time: "Good sister, good sister, spare me." I don't dare. ”

A piece of paper slipped out of Chen Yuxin's hand. Qin Lei shouted: "Hey, what is this?" As she spoke, she bent down first and picked it up and pinched it in her hand, and smiled at Chen Yuxin secretly: "What love words are written on it? Aren't you afraid that I will read it?" After speaking, Qin Lei quickly turned around and opened the note and read: "The night of the heavenly steps is as cold as water, sit and watch the morning glory Vega." What is this!" Seeing Qin Lei's disappointed look, Chen Yuxin said proudly: "Little girl, what do you think? It's just two lines of poetry, see where you want to go?" Seeing that Chen Yuxin couldn't come to snatch it, Qin Lei leaned over and said, "Why did he write this for you?" Chen Yuxin grabbed the note from Qin Lei's hand and said, "Just now, Xiao Zihua looked at the stars in the sky and casually read these two sentences. I listened to it so well that I asked him to copy it down for me. Qin Lei suddenly realized: "Oh, it turns out that you are looking at the stars, so romantic!" Chen Yuxin unconsciously blushed again, this time there was no way to refute, so he had to say: "Okay, okay, go to sleep." What are you tossing if you don't sleep in the middle of the night?"

Qin Lei took two steps to her bedside, and suddenly turned around and said, "That's right, didn't Xiao Zihua promise to treat him after he finished typing? When will he invite us to dinner?" Chen Yuxin said in a serious tone: "Qin Lei, he doesn't earn much as a security guard, let's just talk about it, do you really let him invite?" Qin Lei smiled: "Yo yo, I know that I feel sorry for him so soon." Chen Yuxin blushed and said softly: "What nonsense are you talking about? I mean we beat him up, why do we have to let people invite us to dinner? It's as if we help others just to eat." Qin Lei smiled: "Why not, I just want that handsome guy to invite me to dinner." You're embarrassed to say it, I'll say it!" Chen Yuxin called out helplessly: "Qin Lei!"

The next day, Qin Lei's first words when she saw Xiao Zihua were: "Hey, handsome guy, the manuscript has been finished for you, it's time to invite us to dinner." Xiao Zihua hurriedly laughed and said, "Certainly, definitely, where do you want to eat?" Qin Lei said: "Of course you go back to the city to eat!" Xiao Zihua asked again: "Where are you going back to the city?" Qin Lei muttered: "Go...... Hey, Yuxin, where do you say to go?" Chen Yuxin said very embarrassedly: "Don't go anywhere, don't use it." With that, he picked up Qin Lei and left. Qin Lei froze and said, "How can you forget it?" handsome guy, let's talk about where to go back." Xiao Zihua said: "Then when will you go back to the city and tell me in advance, and I will go back with you." Qin Lei's "hey" word had not yet come out, and she was dragged away by Chen Yuxin.

A few days later, I caught up with Chen Yuxin and Qin Lei to take turns resting. Qin Lei told Xiao Zihua in advance. So Xiao Zihua and his colleagues changed shifts and returned to the city with the two girls.

The three waited at the bus stop for the bus to come. The car door opened but it was just for Xiao Zihua. Xiao Zihua wanted the two girls to go first. Qin Lei pushed him violently and said, "Oh, you can go first." You're welcome, it's not the same who gets on first!" said Xiao Zihua and got into the car. Coming to the car, Qin Lei instructed Xiao Zihua to sit in a seat by the window, and then she sat in the seat next to Xiao Zihua. Chen Yuxin came up behind the two of them, and could only sit in the row of seats behind the two.

Along the way, Qin Lei kept talking and laughing loudly with Xiao Zihua. Xiao Zihua answered with Qin Lei, but his eyes glanced at Chen Yuxin's seat behind him from time to time.

When the car arrived at the terminal, the three got off the bus. Qin Lei gently pulled Chen Yuxin aside and said, "Hey, I'm leaving." I'll leave it to you. Chen Yuxin was startled and exclaimed, "What? Are you leaving?" Qin Lei said astringently: "Yes! What are you doing if you don't leave?" Only then did she realize that this seemingly innocent little girl was also secretly in love with Xiao Zihua. Chen Yuxin said in a trembling voice: "Qin Lei!" Qin Lei smiled hard and said, "Don't blame me for grabbing your seat in the car." I can't stand letting you two sit together and chill me out. Well, I've been bothering you for so long, I'm not going to get caught between you anymore. With that, Qin Lei turned around and was about to leave.

Chen Yuxin grabbed Qin Lei and said anxiously: "We all came out together, then we will wait until we eat before leaving!" Qin Lei laughed out loud and said, "You think I really want to eat his food, I want to help you! If you don't have me by your side, can you two come out together? You haven't seen him yet, if you don't push him, how can he take action!" Chen Yuxin was silent.

Qin Lei shook off Chen Yuxin's hand violently and said with a smile: "You remember to thank me!" Before the words fell, the person quickly ran to the other side of the road and stopped a taxi. Qin Lei pulled the car door, waved her hand at Chen Yuxin and Xiao Zihua, and said, "Handsome guy, goodbye" After speaking, she bowed down and got into the taxi. The taxi sped away.

Xiao Zihua stepped forward and asked Chen Yuxin, "Why did Qin Lei leave?" Chen Yuxin let out an "ah" in a panic, and stammered for a long time: "She, she has something to do temporarily." Xiao Zihua let out a thoughtful "oh", and then said, "Then let's go." What do you like to eat?" Chen Yuxin was a little nervous, and suddenly said: "If you don't forget it, let's not eat it, let's go home." Xiao Zihua smiled: "How can this be done? I came back specifically to accompany you to dinner." If you don't eat it, I won't run away in vain? Besides, if you don't eat it, the next time Qin Lei sees me, I'm afraid she won't let me go. Both of them laughed at the words.

After laughing, Chen Yuxin felt much more relaxed and said, "I can't tell what I want to eat for a while." Let's walk down the street first. When we saw a good restaurant, we went in and ate. So the two of them walked casually down the street.

Xiao Zihua looked at the storefronts on both sides of the street carefully as he walked. As soon as he saw the façade of the hotel, Xiao Zihua would ask Chen Yuxin: "How is this house?" and said nothing else. Chen Yuxin saw it in his eyes and was angry in his heart, and said secretly: "Dumb wood, dead eyes, is it just to ask you to come out just to eat? I won't say anything else? Where is the ability to write a thousand words?" Thinking of this, Chen Yuxin deliberately closed his mouth tightly and did not gnaw, intent on embarrassing Xiao Zihua. And Xiao Zihua's reaction in this regard is obviously relatively slow, he didn't understand the thoughts of the girls around him, and he was still seriously picking the restaurant.

In the end, Chen Yuxin couldn't help but ask first: "What did you do before you came to the manor?" Xiao Zihua hurriedly replied: "Oh, I used to work in a factory as a worker. Chen Yuxin asked again: "Then why didn't you do it?" Xiao Zihua smiled faintly and said, "Our factory is bankrupt." Chen Yuxin asked again: "Then why did you want to be a security guard? Didn't you find a better job?" Xiao Zihua said: "I found it." When I first came out of the factory, I ran through the insurance. But I don't know why I can't sign an insurance policy. Later, I subscribed to a newspaper, but because I couldn't order a newspaper, I was kicked out. Later, he brought water to people, and he only earned a dozen yuan a day from morning to dark. ”

When Chen Yuxin heard this, his heart suddenly "gedeng". From the day she met Xiao Zihua, Xiao Zihua left her with the impression of handsome and calm appearance, deep and broad talent. In Chen Yuxin's heart, he always feels that such a person must live a chic and free life, and everything goes well. I didn't expect that listening to my lecture would be full of hardships and ups and downs. Chen Yuxin said silently in his heart: "It turns out that his life is not easy. ”

At this time, Chen Yuxin saw a small noodle restaurant on the street. Suddenly, she said, "Let's eat here." Xiao Zihua looked at the narrow façade and said embarrassedly: "This place is so small...... Chen Yuxin said with interest: "I like to eat noodles." And this place is quiet, it's too chaotic in the hotel, and it's noisy. Xiao Zihua listened, so he had to accompany her in.

The noodle restaurant is not a big place, but there are a lot of tables, and it looks very crowded. Fortunately, the store is very clean, and the objects are neatly arranged, which makes it more comfortable for people to look at. The two of them picked up a corner spot and sat down. The table is small enough to seat four people together. Chen Yuxin chose a seat in the corner, and Xiao Zihua sat opposite her.

After sitting down, Chen Yuxin called the waiter in the store and only said that he wanted two bowls of noodles. She asked for a small bowl for herself, a big bowl for Xiao Zihua, and nothing else. Xiao Zihua smiled and said, "How can this work?" insisted on ordering a few dishes. Chen Yuxin only ordered two side dishes. Xiao Zihua saw it and asked for a hot drink for Chen Yuxin alone.

After a while, the meal was served. The meals were exquisitely made and tasted good. It's no wonder that a small noodle restaurant can gain a foothold in the city. Chen Yuxin only tasted a few bites and then stopped his chopsticks. She still has a lot to say, but she doesn't want to finish the noodles at once.

Chen Yuxin took a sip of the drink, and then asked Xiao Zihua: "When did you start writing?" Xiao Zihua also put down his chopsticks and said, "It's too early to count." It's been since I was in high school. I wrote my first novel in my sophomore year of high school. Chen Yuxin said: "Yo, that time is not short. Then you must have written a lot of things, right? Have you published them in a journal?" Xiao Zihua smiled regretfully: "No." Chen Yuxin asked, "Why, haven't you ever submitted a manuscript?" Xiao Zihua said: "Why not?" When I was learning to write in the early days, I often submitted manuscripts. But how do you just do it? You also have to go out and get in touch with editors and writers and ask them for advice, so that you can improve yourself. ”

Chen Yuxin said: "Then go, can't you find them yet?" Xiao Zihua smiled: "Then how can you not find them?" But finding editors and writers takes time and energy, and sometimes it costs money, for example, you have to spend money to go out to eat, live and travel. And I don't have any of these!" Chen Yuxin said strangely: "You don't?" She felt that this fact was incomprehensible: "Since this person is so obsessed with writing, why doesn't he have the time and energy to contact editors and writers?" So she continued to ask: "Why not?" Xiao Zihua said helplessly: "Because my family does not approve." ”

This time, Chen Yuxin was even more incomprehensible, and asked: "Your family doesn't approve? Why don't you approve, isn't it good to engage in writing?" Xiao Zihua smiled bitterly: "If it's good, will you approve of it?" Chen Yuxin said: "Why don't you approve of good things?" Xiao Zihua said: "Because you can't make money by doing this, you can't support your family!" Chen Yuxin didn't expect the reason to be so simple, such a realistic reason. She was speechless for a moment, not knowing how to respond.

The two were silent for a moment, and Xiao Zihua slowly continued: "When my parents found out that I was engaged in writing, they didn't think it was right at first, thinking that I was just a whim. When they saw that I was intoxicated, they began to interfere with me. Chen Yuxin asked, "Did you disobey their orders for the sake of writing?" Xiao Zihua said: "No! As soon as I graduated from high school, I started working as a temporary worker." I do writing in my spare time, and I never delay things. Chen Yuxin said: "Then why are they still opposed?" Xiao Zihua said: "Because not only do you not make money by doing this, but you also have to spend money!" Chen Yuxin exclaimed: "Spend money?" This reason surprised her again. She really can't imagine that because she is afraid of spending money, she will not let people pursue it. So he said, "How much does this cost?" Xiao Zihua said: "First of all, you have to spend money to buy books to read, right? But in my father's opinion, buying books is a waste." It's better to buy something to eat and eat it cost-effectively. Chen Yuxin laughed out loud: "It costs money to go to school, isn't it cost-effective?" Xiao Zihua said: "That's different." That is for the future and the way out, and reading for the cultivation of the soul are two different things. Chen Yuxin suddenly restrained his smile. It dawned on her that it wasn't funny. How many people in life are struggling to study for a diploma, but it is impossible for him to read some books to cultivate his temperament.

Chen Yuxin said: "But since you have started to work to earn money, you don't need them to bear it, they shouldn't be able to control you." Xiao Zihua said: "Why can't you take care of it? The money I earn is handed over to them." Chen Yuxin was stunned again, and her salary has been at her disposal since she worked. After receiving the salary, she had to give it to her parents in full, which was another thing that she couldn't imagine or understand. She didn't even know how to comment on it.

Xiao Zihua continued: "When I first started working, my mother gave me five yuan to spend on my salary every month, and it took two years to increase to ten yuan. If I spend more than that, my mom is going to nag. What's more, they didn't approve of my book buying and submitting manuscripts. In order not to make them nag, I try not to exceed the pocket money they give me every time I buy a book. However, some of the books I fancy are more expensive. Sometimes in order to buy a set of books that I like, I have to spend months on end without spending money to save enough!" Chen Yuxin just listened quietly. Although her family was not wealthy, she could get whatever she wanted for as long as she could remember. She had never heard of such a small wish to buy a book as difficult to fulfill. She could only look at Xiao Zihua blankly, she didn't know whether to laugh or sigh.

Half-ringing, Chen Yuxin thought of a sentence: "Your parents are too stingy." Xiao Zihua shook his head with a smile and said, "Not exactly, the main thing is that their income is too low." And they don't have dreams. In addition to providing for their families, they cannot understand or accept people's other pursuits. They are even skeptical of the motives for such actions. Soon after I joined the workforce, I was introduced by a friend to a literary club. But until two years after I joined the Literary Club, I didn't let my parents know" Chen Yuxin asked puzzledly: "Why?" Xiao Zihua said: "In order not to worry them." In the eyes of my parents, people who engage in social activities have evil intentions, for fear that I will be deceived, so they don't want me to participate in any social activities. But I can't just do nothing to satisfy their wishes, can I? But in this way, my participation in the activities of the literary club is greatly restricted. Except for attending the regular meetings of the Literary Club at a convenient time, I did not dare to participate in some large-scale outings held by the Literary Club. I was able to get in touch with some editors and writers through the Literary Society. But I couldn't participate in most of those activities. Occasionally, I caught up, but because my actions were restricted, I didn't dare to show myself boldly. Once those teachers make some requests, I'm afraid I won't be able to do it. So my writing is basically on my own.

Chen Yuxin looked at Xiao Zihua's helpless appearance, and couldn't help but feel uncomfortable. She smiled bitterly at Xiao Zihua. Xiao Zihua was silent for a long time, and then said slowly: "At that time, I really had no choice, what else could I do in the face of my parents? My only hope is to wait until I get married and then let go of my own writing." Chen Yuxin also said excitedly when he heard this: "Yes, when you get married, you will be completely independent, and your parents will not be able to interfere with you if you want to do anything at that time." Xiao Zihua looked at Chen Yuxin's joyful appearance, but shook his head with a wry smile.

Chen Yuxin's heart was cold, and said: "What, are your parents still interfering with you when you get married?" Xiao Zihua smiled bitterly: "It's not just your parents, but you have another wife!" Chen Yuxin was stunned and asked: "What, your wife doesn't like you to write?" When Chen Yuxin asked, he found that he was secretly happy.

Xiao Zihua said: "My parents don't like me to write, and they can only oppose it in their attitude. It's not convenient to stop me directly when I'm writing. But my wife is different, she not only opposes you in her attitude, but she will also directly stop you when you are writing" Chen Yuxin exclaimed: "How can this be? Before getting married, didn't she know that you liked to write?" Xiao Zihua said: "I said it! But she didn't say she didn't like it." Maybe she thought it was just sweet words under the moon before the flowers, just talk about it. After I got married, I found it harder to write. Not only did my wife not support me, but she would stop me while I was writing. I can only write something when she's not at home. As soon as she was home, I had to stop even if I was thinking about it. Later, when our daughter was born, I thought it would be even more impossible to write at home. But at that time, I had to go home except for work, so I basically didn't have time to write. ”

Speaking of this, Xiao Zihua paused for a moment before continuing: "But writing has been integrated into my blood and has become a part of my life. I can't give up anymore. At that time, I didn't have time to write a complete article, but I often carried a small notebook with me. As soon as a spark of thought flashes through my head, I'll write her down. For a while, I had a novella in mind, but I didn't have time to write her. But I wanted to write it out so much that I wrote it while I went to work. The machines in the place where I work are very big and very loud when they work. Boom, boom, people who have just gone can't adapt to it and will feel shocked and flustered. Such an environment would not have been suitable for writing, and it was still during work. But at that time, there was really no way but to write like that. I cut the paper into palm-sized pieces and put them in the pockets of my overalls. When I went to work, I went out to check the machine for a while, and after seeing that everything was in order, I went back to the control room, took out a small piece of paper from my pocket and put it on my lap and wrote a paragraph. After writing it down for a while, go out and check the machine. If everything is fine, come back and write another paragraph. However, there are very few normal times at work, and there are often things, and once there is something, you can't write. Sometimes I can't even write a word a day. However, I wrote a little bit when I had time, and finally finished it. However, the writing time dragged on for a long time, and I wrote more than 10,000 words for more than three months. It is said that you can't do private work when you go to work. However, for workers who do manual work, writing is not considered work. ”

Chen Yuxin looked at Xiao Zihua blankly, she couldn't imagine that his writing road was so difficult. And what surprised her even more was that Xiao Zihua was still able to maintain such calm when telling this. After a while, she asked: "Was there really no other way at that time?" Xiao Zihua smiled: "If there were, would I embarrass myself like that?"

Chen Yuxin was also silent, she didn't know what to do next. And the topic was too heavy for her to feel depressed. So she changed the subject and said, "But your writing talent is really high." Qin Lei and I read your long story and thought it was very well written. It's like the heroine in it is very vivid and cute. ”

Xiao Zihua became excited as soon as he heard about his work, and said happily: "Really, what do you say about her?" Chen Yuxin said: "I can't talk about this for a while." I just think that the heroine writes very realistically, as if there is really such a person. I think she must have a prototype. Some of the descriptions I think are very realistic, not as if they can be fictional. Xiao Zihua said: "Yes, she is a real person." It was a neighbor of a yard when I was a child. Chen Yuxin said: "Really, so it's your childhood sweetheart?"

Xiao Zihua said: "Neighbors are neighbors, but they are not childhood sweethearts. Because we never played together when we were kids. Chen Yuxin asked, "Why is that?" Xiao Zihua smiled: "When we were children, boys and girls didn't talk. And she and we are not even classmates?" Chen Yuxin said: "How is that possible? Since we live in the same courtyard, we should always study in the same school, right?" Xiao Zihua said: "But she doesn't study in the same school as us." Chen Yuxin asked, "Why?" Xiao Zihua said: "Because she is the son of a cadre." Chen Yuxin was speechless, Xiao Zihua said something she didn't seem to understand.

After a slight pause, Xiao Zihua recalled: "I can't remember when our family moved to that yard. Anyway, when our family moved to that compound, her family was already living in that compound. As soon as the courtyard entered the gate, there was a small courtyard on the left hand. The house in the small courtyard is better than the one in the compound, not only the house for the residents, but also the kitchen is better than ours. At that time, families simply built a small room in the courtyard to serve as a kitchen. The bricks used to build the house were all picked up from all over the place, some large and some small, and most of them were half pieces. The doors and windows were also removed from the old house, and they were installed on the kitchen, which was large or small, in short, very incommensurate with the kitchen. The kitchen in the small courtyard is covered with red bricks, and the doors and windows are also specially made. The small kitchen looks very exquisite, and the whole small courtyard also looks very tidy. There is also a tall poplar tree in the middle of the courtyard, which makes the small courtyard very quiet. When I first found out about that small compound, I thought how nice it would be if our family could live in such a small courtyard. Later, when I grew up, I realized that only those who were cadres -- and not ordinary cadres -- could have the opportunity to live in such a good house.

"That small courtyard is her home, and her father is a government cadre. I can't remember exactly what the job title was. It was as if her father's position was always moving up the ladder in the conversation. Her mother was a doctor at the hospital, and this had not changed in years. They have two children, the eldest of whom is about my age. The youngest was a boy, about two or three years younger than me. Her family's economic conditions are better than those of other families in our hospital, and everything they eat is better than ours. Even her children don't go to school like we do. We went to school nearby, and her children went to the best schools in the city. So don't look at the fact that we live in the same house, from elementary school to middle school, I and the two children in this family have not even spoken a word. If they had moved out at that time, I wouldn't have known them. If they had moved out then, the rest of the story wouldn't have happened. ”

Speaking of this, Xiao Zihua couldn't say any more, lowered his head and used chopsticks to pick the noodles in the bowl. Apparently these accounts brought back painful memories for him. Chen Yuxin waited for a while, Xiao Zihua was still speechless, she couldn't help asking, "What happened later?" Xiao Zihua raised his head and looked straight at Chen Yuxin, as if he wanted to find something from her face. Chen Yuxin was embarrassed to look at it, and lowered his head shyly. Xiao Zihua woke up like a dream, and twisted his head to the side.

Xiao Zihua continued: "When I started paying attention to her, I had already graduated from high school. I didn't get into college, and I was working part-time at the time. One day when I came back from outside, I happened to run into her coming out of the courtyard and pouring ashes outside. Their family seems to be very machismo. We often see her doing housework with her mother, but not her father and her brother. At that time, she wore a wet towel on her head, a white shirt on her upper body, and a pair of black trousers on her legs, looking very plain. I don't know what's going on, seeing her like this, my heart suddenly moved inexplicably. My eyes involuntarily turned away from her, and she turned back to look at me. We both looked at each other and smiled. This is the first time we have been neighbors for many years. After laughing, I don't want to mention how comfortable I feel. After I got home for a long time, I still feel sweet when I think back on this scene. ”

Hearing this, Chen Yuxin said: "Isn't it good? You have affection for her, and you have lived in the same courtyard for so many years." Xiao Zihua shook his head and said, "But I didn't dare to have any extravagant hopes from the beginning. Chen Yuxin asked: "Why?" Xiao Zihua said: "Because the gap between our two families is too big." This gap is not even a little hidden, but is nakedly exposed to us. So from the beginning, I didn't dare to show my love publicly, so I could only silently follow her in my heart.

When I paid attention, I found that her personality was gentle, very quiet and very gentle. What is especially amazing is that her family conditions are so superior, but she is not as fond of dressing as ordinary girls, and her clothes are always very simple. Don't look at her personality is so gentle, but she is very bold in pursuing her own love. Every time she saw me, she always took the initiative to greet me warmly and never hid her affection for me.

"And my performance was so bad. I was always hesitant and evasive about her enthusiasm. When I think of her father's face, which has been flat all day and has never smiled, I shudder. I thought it was hard for me to face her father. Not only is it difficult to face, but my father is also difficult to face!"