Chapter 757: I'm talking cross talk in Beizhan

When Song Zheng appeared on the stage of the North Exhibition, the audience was stunned, although Deyun Club had been promoting it before, in this performance, the three disciples of Old Man Zhang would all take the stage.

But in people's eyes, Song Zheng was at best on stage to interact with the actors of Deyun Club, and no one expected that Song Zheng would really wear a coat to talk about cross talk.

Song Zheng was praised by Guo Banzhu's old partner Yu Qian, the two of them stood on the stage, for three minutes, the applause did not stop, and they could watch Song Zheng come on stage and say a paragraph, just like this, today's ticket money is definitely worth it.

Song Zheng didn't have stage fright at all, and smiled: "The theater of 3,000 people, throwing away the empty seats, I am very pleased!"

This is the usual opening of Guo's class master, but now that Song Zheng has taken it out, the reaction on the scene was surprisingly good.

"This is the first time that Teacher Yu and I have spoken cross talk together. ”

Yu Qian held it and said, "That's right. ”

Song Zheng continued: "Teacher Yu is familiar to everyone, a talent in the cross talk industry. ”

Yu Qian hurriedly waved his hand and said, "Don't dare to be, you are a genius." ”

Song Zheng said with a smile: "Say a word of conscience, let Teacher Yu hold me and say, I'm climbing high!"

"You're welcome!"

"I was still nervous yesterday, the first time I stood in front of so many people and said cross talk, if you want to say that you are not nervous, it is absolutely nonsense, and if you want to say this, you will blame my master!"

"How?"

"If you teach me two more paragraphs, I won't panic when I come on stage, and I will also take in a meal of roast mutton!"

Yu Qian hurriedly stopped: "What do you say, you should make it clear first!"

Song Zheng said: "Isn't this just to let Teacher Yu hold on to something, I'm in a hurry to invite people to eat and roast mutton, is there such a thing!?"

Yu Qian smiled: "This is true!"

"That mutton is really crispy and rotten, take a bite, that one is tender, just like Teacher Yu and his daughter-in-law. ”

"What is this called?" Yu Qian's eyes were suddenly anxious.

The on-site reaction was excellent, especially when he saw Song Zheng take Yu Qian to open the shabu, they all burst into laughter.

These burdens are all compiled with the help of Guo Banzhu, even if Song Zheng is a little bit hot, and Yu Aunt holds it, the effect can also come out, Guo Banzhu is from the folk, and he has never had any scruples when it comes to cross talk, he only looks at the audience's reaction, and he will say what the audience likes to listen to.

Yu Qian's skills are very deep, he will hold whatever Song Zheng says, anyway, no matter what style Song Zheng comes, he can hold it.

The cross talk continued, and Yu Qian turned sideways and scolded: "There is no one like you who speaks." ”

Song Zheng is still explaining to others: "Misunderstandings, all misunderstandings, my relationship with my sister-in-law is too pure, I only have respect for my sister-in-law, and I have nothing else to think about." ”

"That's right. Yu Qian nodded and said.

Song Zheng said to Qian: "If you want to say this, I want to congratulate you." ”

Yu Qian was puzzled: "Congratulations to me what?"

Song Zheng said: "Congratulations on marrying such a good daughter-in-law." ”

Yu Qian said happily: "It's okay, it's okay." ”

Song Zheng accused: "What do you mean by okay, how excellent, my sister-in-law has almost no shortcomings." ”

Yu Qian also asked, "Why do you add an almost?"

Song Zheng said: "Because my sister-in-law has another shortcoming. ”

Yu Qian asked, "What?"

"She snores when she sleeps. ”

"Oh, that's right. Yu Qian nodded in understanding.

The audience burst out laughing.

Hearing the audience laughing, Yu Qian reacted and exclaimed: "Wait a minute, you, you tell me first, my daughter-in-law is snoring, how do you know?"

Song Zheng said without thinking: "I slept with my sister-in-law?"

"What?"

"No, no, no. Song Zheng hurriedly explained, "My sister-in-law and I are colleagues, what we heard when we took a nap in the office, in the office, there were many people sleeping on the table." ”

"Oh. Yu Qian breathed a sigh of relief, "Scared me." ”

Song Zheng wiped the sweat on his head and said, "It also scared me." ”

The audience at the scene especially ate this set, and they all leaned forward and backwards with laughter, similar jokes, Guo Banzhu has used them countless times, but now they are picked up by Song Zheng, an amateur player, and the effect is surprisingly good.

Today, there are many friends in the circle specially invited by Song Zheng in the audience, all of them are big names, hidden in the audience at the moment, listening to Song Zheng's meat jokes, and they all laughed crazy.

The cross talk performance continued, and Song Zheng was still blaming Yu Qian: "Look at your many rights and wrongs, you are cranky all day long, and your thoughts are too dirty." ”

Yu Qian pointed at himself: "Me?"

Song Zheng pointed at Yu Qian with his finger and said, "It's not you, you know that you doubt my relationship with my sister-in-law." ”

Yu Qian was almost speechless: "It's my fault." ”

Song Zheng hated iron and said: "Tell me what the relationship between the two of us is, ah, we grew up together and learned cross talk together, how many years of friendship have you had, how can you think like this." ”

Yu Qian was speechless by Song Zheng's grief and indignation.

Song Zheng continued: "I still remember when I was young, the two of us were bullied by a group of older children, oops, that beating, tsk, I still remember the pain." ”

Yu Qian nodded: "Yes." ”

Song Zheng said: "Later, that group of people also lacked morality, and they refused to let us go, so they pointed to a pile of dog shit on the ground, and said that if you eat this thing, you can leave, you don't say a word, just lie on the ground~~~~~"

Song Zheng raised his head, pointed his hand, and then gave a thumbs up to make a look of admiration.

Yu Qian exclaimed in surprise: "Eat?"

Song Zheng shook his head and said, "It's not all, you said a word after eating." ”

Yu Qian asked, "What did you say?"

Song Zheng shouted: "One more lump." ”

"Ahh

The audience was laughing and the response was enthusiastic.

Song Zheng gave him a thumbs up and said, "You are this." ”

Yu Qian slapped his hand away directly and said, "Don't come to this set, oh, I've eaten, why did you go?"

Song Zheng said confidently: "Didn't they say that they would let us go after eating the cake, which is my duty." ”

Yu Qian sneered a few times: "This dare is that I eat, you eat cake?"

Song Zheng smiled and said: "What I'm talking about is this friendship between the two of us, the friendship is good, the two of us are definitely iron buddies, according to the words of the ancients, this is called one expensive and one cheap, friendship is to see, and one life is to see friendship." Passing through the house, the wife does not avoid it, this is the friendship of entrusting the wife and the child. ”

Giving his wife and children.

This cross talk was learned by Song Zheng from Mr. Zhang these days, and of course, Guo Banzhu also ordered a lot.

It was all a cushion just now, but now this is considered to be a living, Yu Qian's heart is also a lot more steady, and he said: "What does this sentence mean, what is one expensive and one cheap, friendship is present? You explain it!"

Song Zheng asked rhetorically, "You don't know?"

Yu Qian shook his head: "I don't know." ”

Song Zheng said: "Then I'll explain to you, one is expensive and one is cheap, just make an analogy, for example, I am very poor, my family is very poor, and I can't help it, in that winter, it is more than 30 degrees below zero, and even the dogs dare not come out, and the cement on the ground is frozen and cracked." ”

"It's so cold. ”

"Yes, it's freezing, and I'm standing alone on the street, with no clothes to wear, a fertilizer bag on my upper body, and a shoelace on my lower body. ”

Yu Qian was puzzled: "Shoelaces, where are they tied?"

Song Zheng said vaguely: "This ~~~~~~~, let's continue to talk about my sister-in-law's snoring." ”

Yu Qian hurriedly stopped: "No one likes to listen to that, you better continue." ”

After a pause, Yu Qian continued: "So miserable, then what are you doing on the road this winter?"

Song Zheng said: "Looking for food, there is no food at home, and my wife and children are hungry at home." ”

Yu Qian said: "Oh, it's so miserable, then why don't they come out?"

Song Zheng said with a bitter face: "There is no way, there are no clothes at home, just this one on me, whoever goes out will wear it." ”

"Huh, you have a fertilizer bag and a shoelace?"

Song Zheng said: "Yes, isn't this a rut, come out and find something to eat." ”

Yu Qian asked again: "Then are you looking for it?"

Song Zheng shook his head and sighed: "No, it's cold, and the coffin shop won't even open, where is there anything to eat." ”

"So what to do?"

Song Zheng said: "There is no way, I can only go to the garbage room to rummage through the garbage." ”

Yu Qian's face wrinkled: "Hey, it's not dirty." ”

Song Zheng was about to cry: "There's no way, there's no edible garbage in the garbage room, just when I can't help it, a cold wind drifted by, and a luxury car stopped in front of me." ”

Yu Qian asked curiously, "What kind of luxury car?"

Song Zheng gestured a finger: "An extended version of the 28 bicycle, panoramic sunroof, manual gear shifting, free acceleration." ”

"Bicycles?"

Song Zheng explained: "The extended version. ”

Yu Qian said angrily: "That's called aggravation, now the post office doesn't need this broken car to send letters, and it's a luxury car, and it's not a shame." ”

Song Zheng smiled: "This is a symbol of your status, rich people drive this car, and on the leather seat made of crocodile leather in the back sits your Xiaomi, a particularly good-looking woman." ”

Yu Qian shouted: "What, what kind of bullshit leather seats, then break the back seat of the bicycle, iron, at most two pieces of cloth on it." ”

Song Zheng said: "You have money. ”

Yu Qian waved his hand and said, "What's the matter, the poor are all riding bicycles." ”

Song Zheng said: "You are dressed well, this famous brand, a famous brand." ”

Yu Qian asked, "What are you wearing here?"

Song Zheng gestured on his body: "You are wearing a Zhongshan suit that has not been washed for 20 years, and you are wearing a pair of jeans that your grandfather handed you down." ”

Yu Qian shouted to Song Zheng: "You wait a minute, the jeans that my grandfather passed on to me, were there jeans at that time?"

Song Zheng explained: "This grandfather is not a relative, you recognize it." ”

Yu Qian was surprised: "Oh, what did you do?"

Song Zheng nodded and said, "Yes, when you were a child, you called me grandpa in order to bury me." ”

"Ah, you, I'm calling you a dead man?"

Song Zheng said of course: "That's not it, you said that we are both about the same age, you still have to bury me, and you have to call me grandpa, this is not what I am." ”

Yu Qian frowned and said, "Ho, am I so cheap?"

Song Zheng nodded, and said in a sincere tone: "Your cheapness is beyond your imagination." ”

Yu Qian shouted: "Go." ”

Song Zheng continued to say with a bitter face: "This situation makes me ashamed, I am so poor that I don't even have pants to wear, I can only tie a broken shoelace, but my hair is now developed, I have become a big boss, my family assets are tens of billions, and I drive a luxury car." ”

Yu Qian waved his hand and said, "Don't mention that luxury car." ”

Song Zheng said: "I don't have the face to see my little friend back then, I'm ashamed, holding a fertilizer bag to block my shameful face, I don't dare to raise my head, at this time, you suddenly saw me, you screamed in surprise." ”

"What's it called. Yu Qian immediately responded.

Song Zheng made a surprised expression: "Grandpa, is it you, grandpa." ”

Before he finished speaking, he was pushed by Yu Qian and said, "Is that what you call it?"

Song Zheng hurriedly explained: "You are here to abuse me, to abuse me." ”

Yu Qian was also a little angry: "Am I abusing you?"

Song Zheng nodded hurriedly: "I'm old-fashioned, you've been so bad for me since I was a child." ”

"Ho. Yu Qian covered his face, and he was about to collapse.

The audience also watched it with relish, and ethics have their indecentness, but this kind of ridicule is the funniest, there is an old saying that is good, if you don't make a mistake, you can't laugh.

Song Zheng continued to make a surprised look: "Grandpa, I see you again, why are you here? I covered my face myself, I was embarrassed to say it, it's too embarrassing." The gap between us is too big, and after you asked again and again, I told you about the tragic situation in my family. ”

"You are very sympathetic to me after hearing this, you don't dislike me at all for being a poor friend, and now that you have money, you are willing to help me, so let your Xiaomi take out the checkbook from the leather seat of your luxury car. ”

Hearing this, Yu Qian silently complained: "What kind of leather seat, that is, there is a broken book on the clip of the back seat of the bicycle." ”

Song Zheng ignored him and continued: "You take the checkbook, take out a pen and write down a string of numbers on it, I took it over and looked at it, there were one in front and more than a dozen zeros in the back, I was stunned at the time." ”

Yu Qian said: "Don't be confused first, let's go to the bank first and see if you can cash it out." ”

Song Zheng continued: "I'm stupid, the words of thanks are blocked in my throat, I can't say it, tears will flow down at once, but you don't care at all, wave your hand, pedal your luxury car, and carry your beautiful Xiaomi behind." ”

Yu Qian said again: "Pedaling? That's still a bicycle." ”

Song Zheng said: "With your money, I will have food to eat and clothes to wear when I return home, and this family will also live a good life." This is called one expensive and one cheap, and friendship is present. ”

Yu Qian understood: "Oh, that's what it means, what does it mean to die and live, but to see friendship." ”

Song Zheng asked rhetorically, "You don't understand this, do you?"

Yu Qian shook his head: "I don't understand." ”

Song Zheng said: "That's okay, I'll explain it to you." Well, for example, if you go to a small coal kiln to dig coal, and then the coal mine collapses, you are crushed to death. ”

"Ahh Yu Qian was not happy.

Song Zheng also came up: "Nonsense, I explained it to you, if you don't die, will I die? If you want to listen, you have to die! Do you want to hear it, does Teacher Yu have to die!?"

"Dead ~~~~~"

Yu Qian was helpless, and said: "I'm so hated, okay, I'll die!"

Song Zheng smiled and said, "You died, you were crushed to death." ”

"Yes. Yu Qian said with the unhappiness in his heart.

Who knew that Song Zheng was even happier after hearing this, and continued: "You died, you were crushed to death." ”

"It's over. Yu Qian yelled and pushed Song Zheng to the side.

Song Zheng laughed a few times, and everyone in the audience laughed too.

Song Zheng walked back silently, stood upright, smiled, and said, "Don't make trouble, let's get down to business." ”

Yu Qian said: "You should have been down to business." ”

Song Zheng said: "You were crushed to death, and then there are orphans and widows left in your family, no one helps to compensate for the money, I am your good friend, I am still alive, I have to help you." ”

Yu Qian said: "This is as it should be. ”

Song Zheng continued: "I can designate your coal mine to go up, I will find your boss and reason with him, this person has died in your coal mine, you can't ignore this, you have to lose money." ”

Yu Qian responded: "Yes, this must be accompanied." ”

Song Zheng said: "After many rounds of negotiations, your boss promised to lose money, and finally gave eighty-five yuan two." ”

Yu Qian frowned and asked, "How can this be a whole thing?"

Song Zheng explained: "Hey, you're not 85.2 kilograms. ”

Yu Qian instantly understood, and exclaimed: "Oh, a dollar and a kilogram, dare to love me for the same price as celery?"

Song Zheng waved his hand, frowned, and blamed Yu Qian: "What do you call this, what do you mean to be at the same price as celery, people who buy more than 100 catties of celery will wipe off your pennies, you haven't wiped a penny, you are much more expensive than celery." ”

Hearing Song Zheng's theory, Yu Qian was dumbfounded, and he couldn't speak.

Song Zheng smiled and continued: "I'll take your eighty-five yuan and go to your house, the orphans and widows in your family still have to live on your money." ”

Yu Qian said speechlessly: "Just more than 100 catties of celery, what kind of life are you going to live?"

Song Zheng said emotionally: "I was cautious along the way, for fear that robbers and thieves on the road would steal my more than eighty yuan, which is only more than eighty yuan for them, but for me, this is your life." ”

Yu Qian didn't eat this set at all, waved his hand, and said, "If you don't come to this set, you will have more than eighty yuan to top something." ”

Song Zheng retorted: "This is your life's money, you exchanged your life for it, this is called sending goose feathers for thousands of miles, and the courtesy is light and affectionate." ”

Yu Qian yelled: "What a mess. ”

This little burden sounded again, and the response on the scene was good, originally everyone didn't expect much from Song Zheng to say cross talk, just to be lively, who knows, he is really good, this cross talk is really like that.