For a while, I fell into "dreaminess". As soon as I closed my eyes, I had a scene in my mind: I sat alone under a huge pomegranate tree, in an old circle chair, in a golden dusk. The afterglow of the setting sun shines through the dense foliage and scatters Venus all over the ground. The breeze is breezy and red, as if it is a world away...... Slender figures, familiar faces, they smiled, as if they were talking to me, but I couldn't speak......

I woke up in such dreams again and again, and it was difficult to calm my mind. Outside the window, the moon and stars are sparse, and the street lights are dim. My wife always complained that I didn't sleep well in the middle of the night, and was always busy putting on my coat and pulling me into the bed. She stroked my gray hair, muttered to herself, and coaxed me to sleep like a baby......

Once people have memories, there are vicissitudes.

Fifteen years ago, I graduated from a well-known university in China. Although I think I am talented and have the lofty ideal of saving the world and helping the people, the cold reality soon told me that my dream of staying in that first-tier city was shattered immediately, and I could only choose to be stationed at the border and fight alone.

Packing my bags for graduation, I came to this extremely inconspicuous city of H, which is hidden in the southwest of the map of China.

Fortunately, scarcity is expensive, and in H City, where the economy is depressed, there is a lack of talents, and there is a poor egg, a famous college student is a living baby. With the great attention and active arrangement of the personnel department of H City, I stepped into the compound of the city government in one step and became a secretary who was the envy of many people.

The secretary is specially written for the leader. Writing materials for leaders is a career full of temptations and dreams for many people. According to my friend Wang Xiaohuai's statistical analysis, more than 40 percent of the cadres at the department, department, and bureau levels in H City started by working as secretaries to write materials, step by step, and leapfrogging from hell to purgatory, from purgatory to heaven, from ugly daughters-in-law to old women, and small women to big corruption......

I have to admit that Wang Xiaohuai's statistics are true and accurate, but I don't agree with Wang Xiaohuai's evaluation of the secretary's work. Wang Xiaohuai is a teacher in a middle school in H City, a typical pure and high-minded intellectual, full of critical spirit, and a kind of fireworks that do not eat the world.

Wang Xiaohuai has great prejudices against officialdom, especially the leader's secretary, who is naturally hostile, and he even calls the leader's secretary a "son of a bitch." He also used to call me "Bian Mi". As soon as I heard that, I knew his sinister intentions.

Friend Forrest Gump is a little more mature than Wang Xiaohuai at this point. Forrest Gump's evaluation of the secretary's work is generally pertinent and insightful. Forrest Gump said: Secretaries are the "arsenal" of leaders! What a wonderful metaphor this is! Isn't it true that when we do secretarial work, we produce "swords, guns, and cannons" for the leaders to charge into battle and win a decisive victory in the officialdom?

Forrest Gump said that in fact, most of the leaders are simple-minded, and they only have money, wine, and luminous glasses in their eyes, and there is a white and hazy young lady's buttocks. As for the fundamental reason why the leaders are able to talk like a river and pour out the ocean on the stage, to discuss the past and the present, to quote scriptures, to be far-sighted, and to have profound thoughts, it is only the result of the secretaries' night battles. Forrest Gump also added that the secretary is the shadow of the leader, and the leader looks at his shadow every day......

How I eagerly await the shadow to become a leader!

But my leaders, my chief of staff, to be exact, seem to have completely ignored my presence. My director is as thin as a monkey, without the appearance and style of a leader at all, without a fat head, big ears, a big neck and a big ass, and no exaggerated big belly. I don't know if it's because the director is also skinny like a monkey, so he looks down on me the most, because I'm also skinny like a monkey. Once the director and I become the same kind, it is inevitable that the same kind will fight against each other, which is the law of nature. But the director is the director after all, and if you want to fight with the director, you are looking for death? As long as he moves a little finger, I will not be able to turn over for eight lifetimes.

But I'm so stubborn, I shouldn't be self-righteous, and I should take the famous writer Chi Zijian's diagnosis of secretarial work as the wind in my ears. The famous writer Chi Zijian once pointed out in a novel that the realm of a secretary is divided into three levels:

At the first level, boil oil and light the lamp to write a material and send the material to the leader. The leader only glanced at it, but he couldn't stand it anymore, and without changing a word, he called it back and rewrote it! Such a secretary is the lowest level of secretary, and he hasn't even entered the door yet. If the materials are returned and rewritten by the leader one after another, within four times, you can get out of the secretarial position!

The second level is also to boil oil and light the lamp to write a material and send the material to the leader. When the leaders look left and right, they can't see anything wrong; they can't change a single word from left to right. The leader said, "Okay, that's it!" The material that the leader can't change a word proves that you are indeed a secretary of high level. However, if you write too much of this kind of material, in fact, you are not far from death, why? You don't understand such a simple truth! Do you think, how will the leader feel when he sees such material like you? The leader will definitely think, what a dog day, what Lao Tzu has thought of, you have thought of it, and what Lao Tzu has not thought of, you have also thought of, who can still relax in such a person, and who will dare to use it in the future? Therefore, such a secretary is at most a second-rate player.

The real top secretary is the third level of secretary. It was also boiled oil and lit the lamp to write a material and send the material to the leader. When the leader saw it, his eyes were shining, his thoughts were springing, and with a stroke of his pen, he changed from east to west, and he was still unfinished. Seeing such materials, the leader was so happy in his heart! What Lao Tzu thought of, you can't write a little thing, after all, it is Lao Tzu's farsightedness and foresight! What Lao Tzu didn't expect, you kid left a mouth and gave a reminder, you kid is really long-sighted on weekdays, amazing!

Therefore, the secretary should always remember that writing materials for the leader is the leader's material, and the leader's satisfaction is the first thing, and if you are satisfied or dissatisfied, there is no use. But as for me, the materials I wrote to the leaders not only did not leave room for the leaders to arouse the leader's desire to create, but also changed back the things that the director had finally revised but did not modify correctly, and even once theorized and argued with the director, and the director was speechless, so angry that the director was red-faced, and only after a while did he shout out a sentence, you can do it, I, the director, you will do it!

Since then, I have been unlucky, forgotten by the leadership, and I don't want to bother with any materials. Once people are unlucky, maggots will also grow in salt shakers. Once I was forgotten by the leadership, my colleagues sharpened their knives and killed me, or fell into the well, hoping to get rid of them as soon as possible. I was promoted, smiled at me, and showed infinite pity for me on the surface, but in fact it stimulated me and provoked my scarred wounds. I haven't climbed up yet, on the surface, I fought side by side with you, swearing to live and die together, but just when I had just received a little praise and a little bit of resurrection, they shot me in the back, and counted a lot of this and that for you at the leader's place. So, whoever it is, no matter what, they have a very clear purpose, which is to find a way to do everything possible to knock me to the ground and step on 10,000 feet.

I resisted stubbornly for more than three years, and finally I was exhausted and thirsty, and I ran out of ammunition and food, and was completely knocked to the ground. My love for secretarial work diminished day by day, and I gradually became disgusted, and finally I completely despaired because of a small thing.