Human beings are really self-righteous, thinking that they are the essence of the universe and the primate of all things, so they say that love is also mysterious, and it is said that life and death are entangled.

In fact, love is quite simple, and falling in love with someone is also quite simple. In all the "theories of the origin of love", I don't believe much in the "long-term love theory" or "friction electricity theory", and I am more disgusted with the "love at first sight theory". In fact, love is not so complicated, to put it bluntly, it is just the sublimation of animal instinct, and the essence is still an instinct. I don't see the most people who are pretentious, and write at every turn, I love your pure soul. When I look at such sentences, I feel dizzy, nauseous, and want to vomit. I thought these people were really worried about the hypocrisy. I'm more fond of people Li boiling and asking Zhi. Comrade Li Xi said, why I like my wife, is because my wife's thighs are so sexy and charming! In the same way, why I like Li Xiaomei is because Li Xiaomei's buttocks, which are like the tires of a tractor, are so sexy and charming......

Once, I told Li Xiaomei about the truth I had discovered. Li Xiaomei almost choked to death on the beer in her cup. Before Li Xiaomei could swallow the beer, she squirted out, half of the table, and flew onto my clothes. Li Xiaomei's burst laugh obviously shook the entire small wine bar.

But I couldn't laugh. The more Li Xiaomei laughed presumptuously, the more I couldn't laugh. My face must have been as red as a monkey's ass.

Li Xiaomei stopped laughing, stopped laughing again, laughed and stopped, one holding her stomach, her face was full of red light. Li Xiaomei's terrifying laughter finally stopped, so she tilted her neck and asked me, really?

I finally calmed down and said, what's so funny about this?

Li Xiaomei laughed twice more, and said, according to you, my ass is still a baby, you say, what is so good about it? Why did it fascinate you?

I said, not big or small, not fat or thin, not square or round......

Before I finished speaking, Li Xiaomei laughed again and said, really!?

Don't believe it yourself...... I'm getting a little impatient.

Li Xiaomei turned her head, tried to look behind her buttocks, and slapped twice with both hands. Say, why are there so many advantages, why don't I see it?

Li Xiaomei suddenly suppressed her throat, glared at me directly, and said, if you really like it, just give it to you!

I was finally amused by Li Xiaomei and said, how to send it?

Li Xiaomei found that her gaffe fell into my way, and she couldn't answer for a long time, how to send, how to send, chattering endlessly. Suddenly, gritting my teeth, could it be that I cut it off and give it to you?

I hurriedly said, don't, don't, don't, if you cut it off, it will be worse than rotten eggs in three days.

Li Xiaomei burst out laughing again, and this time I laughed too.

In the end, Li Xiaomei praised me a lot, saying, you are a person, you are really invisible, you are stuffy on weekdays, and when you speak, you are quite level......

In the city of H in May, the air was humid, and the weather was changing, just now the sun was scorching, and in a blink of an eye it was a heavy rain, followed by the sun.

It's easy to get wet in such weather. I also ran into a ghost that day, and when I left the office, the sky was still fine. But less than 200 meters away from the bus stop, a rainstorm suddenly came without warning, and in an instant, I became a chicken in the soup.

"Soup Chicken" was stupid by the platform for more than half an hour, there was no hair on a bus, and the buddies who were always entangled on weekdays didn't know what was going on, they were all roaring and whistling, and they didn't bother to pay attention to my hand that was about to dislocate.

Just when I was about to despair, a red taxi rushed straight at me, and with a "squeak" of the brake, splashed me all over my body.

——...... , I was about to scold, half of my brother's head stuck out of the car window, shouting, get in the car!

As soon as I got in the car, I understood, it turned out that Li Xiaomei was also in the car. Li Xiaomei was full of alcohol and said, how can you ——, ...... , No, I didn't go home——, before I finished speaking, Li Xiaomei fell on the chair and stopped making a sound.

's brother parked the car at the gate of Li Xiaomei's community, said that he wouldn't go in at all, and said, get out of the car.

But the rain outside showed no sign of abating at all, how could I get off the bus? Moreover, Li Xiaomei was like a dead pig, and she had long been unconscious. I shook Li Xiaomei for a long time, and only shook out a few "hmm-" words.

When my brother opened the car door, I finally couldn't get angry, and I rushed into the rain with Li Xiaomei on my shoulder......

When I threw the wet Li Xiaomei into the sofa, it was almost 8 o'clock in the evening. Li Xiaomei grabbed a few handfuls on the sofa with both hands, wanting to turn over. As soon as I squatted on the edge of the sofa, Li Xiaomei's head was stuffed into my arms, and before I could react, Li Xiaomei screamed and vomited all over me......

Li Xiaomei vomited three or four times in a row before she turned her head away, put it on the sofa indiscriminately, and didn't move again.

I cleaned Li Xiaomei's bathroom for more than 1 hour, and only returned to the living room after drying my shirt with a blow dryer.

…… , Li Xiaomei's dead dog-like appearance finally made my conscience find, of course, I can't take care of it so much, as soon as I am ruthless, I will peel Li Xiaomei clean...... Later, I casually found a quilt to cover Li Xiaomei.

But I still didn't feel at ease, after more than ten minutes of fierce ideological struggle at the door of Li Xiaomei's house, I still decided to stay, put on a sofa quilt, looked at Li Xiaomei, and fell asleep after watching it.

I was about five o'clock in the morning and woke up with a hungry stomach.

It seems that Li Xiaomei woke up earlier than me, wearing a quilt and a monkey, watching TV, while stuffing cookies into her mouth.

Li Xiaomei, what happened to you yesterday? Why did you drink so much wine? I was about to ask, Li Xiaomei turned her head and looked at me, as if she wanted to speak, but in the end she still didn't say it, and continued to eat her biscuits.

Li Xiaomei and I were embarrassed for a few minutes, but decided to leave.

When I closed the door, I glanced back at Li Xiaomei again. She still kept the same way, and she didn't have the slightest intention of giving it to me.

That morning, I was just in time for the director to "go crazy" and frantically arranged for me to do endless things, not even to catch my breath.

When I was eating lunch, I suddenly remembered Li Xiaomei, so I deliberately stayed in the cafeteria for more than ten minutes, but in the end, I didn't see Li Xiaomei's shadow.

I turned on my mobile phone and was about to dial Li Xiaomei, when I saw a text message from Li Xiaomei in the morning - thank you.

I saw Li Xiaomei again three days later. When I walked out of the office building after work that day, I saw Li Xiaomei standing under a pomegranate tree opposite the office building. Li Xiaomei has already recovered her spirits, and she is also very particular about dressing, and her red dress looks particularly bright and dazzling against the thick dark green pomegranate leaves.

Li Xiaomei handed me a small box and said, "I gave you it, thank you by the way."

Guess what Li Xiaomei gave me, it was a pair of sunglasses! I immediately understood Li Xiaomei's little girl's thoughts, and I laughed hesitantly.

Li Xiaomei also felt that something was wrong, and her face turned red in an instant, and said, next time you dare to look at it, you will gouge out your eyeballs.

I said, don't worry, don't worry, next time, I'll definitely wear sunglasses to see.

Li Xiaomei turned her head and ran away......