I used to know too much, about this era, about their endings, and even about myself.

Now it is like wandering on an unknown journey, and there is no way forward. All the trust is still there, and the love is still there, but it always hurts between the trade-offs.

The hand is loosened, and the heart can't be let go.

Mo Han is about to give birth. The messengers from the house waited in the carriage outside in the snowstorm.

Xiaoyan, who pushed the one she wanted to send, stayed in the room and hurried out of the door of her house, and saw Su Peisheng bowing and waiting there, as if he had frozen into a snowman.

The carriage hurried all the way, and the wind and snow outside the curtain continued to pour in, and the warm hand stove and the thick and soft cloak still couldn't withstand the cold that drilled into the heart.

It's almost the New Year, and this year has passed so fast.

I don't know if such a wind and snow will accompany Yinxiang and Yinzhen all the way to the west, I don't know where their army is going, but it is still full of enthusiasm and passion when they set off. Will the two of them be homesick at the time of the Chinese New Year, or the farther away from home, the more they yearn for the unknown battlefield.

As Su Peisheng walked in the mansion, there was some unspeakable strangeness and alienation in just over ten days. The white-stained trees, the icy water, and the faint scent of plum blossoms were different from when I left.

Turning into the familiar arch and stepping down the steps of the corridor, I heard a sudden cry in front of me, and at the same time, a pink and slender figure in front of the door of Hongwan Courtyard was transmitted to my mind.

After a pause, he heard Su Peisheng beside him carefully call Fu Jin, his head lowered and his waist half-bent. This sound also called back the people in front of the courtyard gate, turned around and looked at me nodding and smiling, like snowflakes fluttering on the ground lotus steps moved lightly, greeted me and half-squatted on the ground and gave a salute, "Embroider to Fujin to say goodbye." The snow this morning is a good sign, and there will be joy after half a day. Fu Jin rest assured, the imperial doctor said that there was no big problem, just wait a little. ”

She is very different from before I left, but in this short period of time, it seems to be a different person. Inside and out.

Su Peisheng gently pushed the courtyard door, and a small hand was already on my arm, helping towards the threshold.

I didn't have time to react to the awkwardness of my arm, and I saw Hongwan guarding the door of the room, and the familiar back standing in the snow.

The length is still long, and I can't tell if I am thin or ...... with a silver-white cloak Eat well and sleep a little richer? The blue-gray fur collar is covered with a layer of white, and there is still snow falling on it. The snowflakes on my braids made me feel like I was in a trance for a moment.

Suddenly I turned around and looked at him, my eyes narrowed, and the hand holding me had left on its own and walked towards him.

"Master, Fu Jin is back. ”

His gaze just like that, fell on me. I watched as she approached him, standing in that position, like me.

Hongwan strode over and stood in front of her, the wide cloak that was still swaying could block her petiteness, but it also covered most of her grandfather's figure. I smiled and swept the snow off his shoulders, looked at the man who was silent a few steps away, and then looked back at my son in front of me, "It's too late." ”

"Where is Eniang, the snow is cold, and she shouldn't have worked hard. Hongwan said and walked me to the front hall door, stopped when he passed by Yinzhen, and helped me to stand firmly in front of him, "Ama also come into the hall and sit, the courtyard is cold, I'm afraid I have to wait." Or go back to Eniang, and wait for the news to go back to the son. ”

Only one step, the snow is like sand, and the strings dance between us, like a layer of white gauze. He seems to be real and illusory.

The elbow is gently held through the cloak and held in the palm of the circle. None of us moved, but the knuckles seemed to be pinched directly to the bones, and they were so stiff that they seemed to have fallen off the back of a horse, and they couldn't move or feel any pain, just a little itchy numbness.

I haven't heard him speak since I entered the hospital, and it's the same at this time. Those familiar eyes are as deep and dark as ever, and when they stare at you, they can make people forget to breathe, as if they will absorb all the qiē into it.

Patting the back of Hongwan's hand with some ice rubbed gently, I couldn't avoid the clamp between my elbows, and the silver flowers were always dangling under my eyes, and the wind blew over and brought up the fine snow to stain me, and fell on the upper of my shoes. "I'm here with you, you go get busy. ”

The black soap boots were fixed in the snow, and I grabbed Hongwan's warming hand when I heard a scream coming from the wing, and grabbed his fingers to look over. There was no sound in the cold air, time froze instantly as if it was blocked by wind and snow, and only the power of holding my hand transmitted a trace of warmth.

After a while, I heard a loud cry, as if it was about to shake off the snow on the dead branches, and resounded through the originally quiet courtyard.

A little girl flashed out of the crack in the door, and with a ball of white gas on her lips, she trotted down the steps, staggered a few steps, fluttered and fell into the snow, and buried her little face in the back of her hand.

"Congratulations to the prince, congratulations to Fujin, congratulations to the second master, the lady has just given birth to a little Gege. Mama said that the mother and daughter were safe. ”

Exhaled a long breath and waited, but no master spoke, seeing that the girl who was still smiling just now was kneeling in front of her and trembling and couldn't help but speak, she just said the word "up" and hurriedly closed her voice, turned her face to Hongwan's shoulder and coughed lightly.

Hongwan looked down at me carefully, and before she finished screaming, her elbows were a little more forceful, and her familiar deep voice was a little hoarse and lost the joy of sitting here last summer, "Reward, go back and serve." ”

It was hard to see a smile on his face, Hongwan was less cold and indifferent, and there was always tenderness between his eyebrows, and he let go of the hand holding me and walked to the door with the girl.

I wanted to stay here, to see what my granddaughter looked like when she first came into the world, but I was half-dragged and half-carried out of the courtyard.

Su Peisheng, who was waiting outside the door, walked briskly in front, looking at me in a daze. I counted the staggered sounds of stepping on the snow, and there should be someone coming out, walking very lightly.

The arms that wore through the cloak were tightly wrapped around my waist, and the tightness of my steps forward allowed me to grab his sleeves and stabilize my body.

"Go get your shoes. Yinzhen kept walking in a hurry, and Meiyu had already responded to a quick turn in another direction, running with a creak.

When I was carried into the carriage, I saw Nian Shi in front of the mansion, standing there with his head half-bowed, his pink skirt fluttering with the cloak of the same color blowing in the wind, and he stood straight with a light pink handkerchief twisted in his hand.

Sitting next to him and not knowing where to go, he closed his eyes close to his chest and didn't want to ask, there was a familiar smell in the cold breath, and it was actually reassuring.

The cold wind poured in, waking me up when I was about to fall asleep, and the bottom of the flower pot I wore when I went out was replaced by ordinary embroidered shoes, which were soft and comfortable, but a little cold.

Peeking through the gap in the corner of the curtain, the white streets and alleys are somewhat similar to the way they came, really send me back? I should be glad that I will not be reluctant to delay for too long, but when he is so understanding, he has a different taste in his heart.

The arms around his waist tightened and tightened me in front of him, the rhythm of my heartbeat and the short snort on my forehead that could still be heard through the thick clothing.

Without speaking or moving, he held the carriage and swayed gently, until I raised my hand to my waist, and then he took my hand and reached into the cloak and fastened it firmly at the side of my waist.

The cloud embroidery silk on the belt is printed on the palm of his hand, and it is even clearer that he is emaciated. The touch under my thumb scared me, and I could almost feel the marks on my ribs.

Sitting on his lap, the two cloaks seemed to be wrapped in one, tightly shielding from the occasional cold wind. The heat emanating from his body gradually spread to me, soaking layer by layer, a long-lost warmth.

"Didn't sleep well?" his voice was as soft as a whisper, melting the tiny snowflakes on his neckline and turning into droplets of water on his face.

"If you're sleepy, talk for a while, don't fall asleep. Go home and sleep again. ”

Didn't you just come out of there?

Raising his eyes, he caught the slight curl of his lips similar to a smile, and his fingertips touched his cheeks to wipe away a damp coolness, and the faint smile had been covered and imprinted on his fingers.

"Is it still cold?" every word is soft, as if it has suddenly passed a long winter and ushered in the warmth of spring, and the flowers are quietly blooming.

His lips were pressed against my face, and he slowly pressed to his lips as his breath softened, his hands behind his back tightened, and the tip of his tongue reached over to hook mine, sucking hard.

The lips that were barely parted were still pressed against each other, looking at the dark eyes that were so deep that I couldn't see them that I gasped and sighed, and a sigh of yin zhen was taken into his mouth again, and he actually bit it hard in my lips.

The faint smell of blood dissipated between the lips, leaving only sandalwood in the palms. Two bodies that can also feel the joints hug each other tightly, who will hurt whom. I'm afraid that if I hurt him, he hurts, and so does he hurt me, and no one will have more than half a point, or less.

was carried in his arms and got out of the carriage, which turned out to be Honghui's home. This reconstructed yard is very lively, because of the return of the red wing, because of the upcoming new life, the winter cold has faded, and the warmth of home is more.

Xiao He still looks so cool, every time he helps her get up and sit down in the face of Hong, the care and caution in his eyes are self-evident. It is also a man who has changed, like Hongwan, who changes himself or each other because of a family.

Hongwan still loves to laugh and say that she loves to stick to me and play tricks, but she also has a little more love for motherhood, and occasionally flashes in her eyes to let me see her efforts and gains.

We sat in the room and chatted for a long time, looking at her face full of happiness and listening to her talk about the joy of the journey. I don't know where I once longed to go, I just want her to live in peace and have a healthy child, and nothing else.

She took my hand and gently pressed it against my bulging belly, the movement inside was so familiar, but my eyes were wet.

"E-niang, why are you like him, you can cry just by touching it. ”

I didn't know how to tell her, wiped my tears and laughed back.

My daughter has experienced love, and the men who love her love their children, but they don't understand the meaning of life yet. For people with different experiences, every new life is different, for me, for Xiaohe, and even for Yinzhen.

People who understand have been hurt and touched by the scene.

For such a Xiaohe, I don't have anything to worry about, Hongwan will not be wronged if he follows him. I just hope that she will never understand, just such simple happiness, simple happiness for a lifetime.

After dinner, the sky was completely dark, and the snow was still reflecting the white light of the city.

I sat in the carriage with Yinzhen in my arms, buried my face in the fluffy neckline, and gently stroked his palm behind my back.

Our children have their own lives, better and better lives, and the two of us can still hug each other like this and feel that each other is unwilling to let go, who says it's not happiness.

The familiar streets are so quiet that only the sound of wheels can be heard, and the familiar palace looms. I leaned on his shoulder and looked out from the corner of the curtain, and passed the big red lantern in front of the house without stopping, and turned directly into the side alley.

My heart kept beating, and I felt like I was going to jump out of my throat and couldn't get it back. The hand around his neck tightened, and the warm cheek lowered to my forehead, lips, and kissed my closed eyelid.

"Are you still sleepy? ”