One day I met her in the elevator. When I opened the elevator door, she was standing in with my roommate, I nodded and smiled at her, she smiled in return, and we didn't say anything. More than a year ago, we were reunited in this elevator. Only then, I still don't know if she recognized me from the shadow reflected in the elevator door that day.

Actually, since we met again, I have been hesitant about one thing, that is, whether I should greet her every time I see her. This kind of uneasiness often disturbs my heart, as if I am taking a bitter taste of Chinese medicine, and I resist it in my heart, but I have to eat it. I feared that this uneasiness and hesitation of mine would manifest itself on my face, and that she or by those close to her would notice that I was still immature in a manner that was very inappropriate for my age, and that she would find out that my hesitation was due to lingering attachment to her. I often watched her react in such situations, but she was always at ease, like the events at graduation that made her immune to me. Especially in an enclosed space, this feeling is even more obvious, and every time I see the elevator door slowly open, I always feel that I am about to face a life and death test. Strangely, I only met her once in the elevator, and thankfully, there was someone else in the elevator at the time, which made me feel much less hesitant to worry about exposing me. I couldn't bear the torture, and after many days, I had to give up the elevator and climb the stairs every day, even with my colleagues, I would climb seven floors to the office on my own. They were inexplicable and asked me why I left the elevator and climbed the stairs instead of walking. I replied to them in the same tone as the last time I replied to my imposter who posted on Blue Star: Because that elevator was cursed, I also have a phobia of confined spaces. Coincidentally, a week after I said this, the elevator broke down twice in a row. Once, he stopped halfway up and down, trapping six people, and once fell straight from the ninth floor, but fortunately stopped on the fifth floor, frightening the staff of three office buildings. In view of these two accidents, the elevator responsible unit has carried out a major overhaul of the elevator, and the frequency of maintenance has become higher. The elevator unit in charge heard me say that the elevator was cursed, and the person in charge came to me and asked me how much I knew about the elevator accident.

"It's not that much of a coincidence. He said, "You must know something, perhaps, you are behind it." ”

"Say whatever you want. I said, "I don't have the leisure to do that kind of thing, if you really suspect it, go to the police." ”

He really called the police and hoped that the police would investigate thoroughly. The police approached me and questioned several of my colleagues who had heard me say that. There was no reason, there was not enough evidence, and in the end nothing happened. This incident caused a sensation in the company. No one believed that I would do such a hurtful thing, they believed more that I had the power of an unpredictable prophet.

My new roommate is particularly attentive to the delicate relationship between me and Hai Linlin, and every time I go to their department, he always pays special attention. He told me his doubts several times in the dormitory, and he said that Hai Linlin and I were always at a distance, trying to distance ourselves from each other, for fear of getting too close to touching the wall made of water. The first time I heard him say that, I was a little worried that he would guess the story behind it and what was on my mind, but in the end I realized that he was just a concern for his roommates and colleagues, not a nosy mouthpiece. And one time when I was back to my dorm room after a night run, he was watching a movie on his phone in bed.

"Hai Linlin is sick today. He said, "It looks like he's very sick." ”

"Yes. I said, "The weather has been changeable lately, so you should pay more attention." ”

He told me that I, as an alumnus, should always show the care I deserve, which would help her recover. I retorted to him that if what I said to myself could have such a miraculous effect, then I would make a lot of money for the world.

In fact, when he talked about Hai Linlin's illness, I was very concerned and worried, I have seen her work with illness, her nose is stuffy, she has difficulty breathing, she has to wipe her nose every few minutes, her face is red, her voice is hoarse, and she seems to be unable to last the next moment at every moment. I was sitting next to her at the time, and I felt the need to show concern for her and tell her that she was so sick that she should take a break. She replied to me that she was fine, and that there were several major tasks that needed to be taken out. I was so impressed by seeing her work while she was sick, so when my roommate told me that she couldn't work because she was sick, I knew she must be very sick and prayed for her to recover quickly. I cared about her from the bottom of my heart – but I never thought about visiting her, not because I was unreasonable, but because I thought I would make her more uncomfortable and aggravated. I know that I can't say anything meaningful and helpful to her recovery other than the kind words I have seen her to recuperate. What's more, I've always felt that she never had the idea of having much to do with me, and the way she looked at me when she saw me, the polite tone she spoke to me, and the graceful steps she took when she turned around all showed a light play on what happened between us seven years ago, as if she had been reborn after the night I almost froze to death, and was reborn as the person she wanted to be—someone who doesn't remember anything.

She had been on a week's break from that illness, and the next time I saw her was at a plenary meeting, and she was haggard from a serious illness, and she looked thinner than the last time I saw her—and she was seven years ago. I sat behind her, looking at her emaciated back, feeling with pity, and deeply felt that such a weak woman did not deserve to suffer so much. It gave me the urge to comfort her, to encourage her, to make her feel the warmth she had experienced seven years ago. She walked down the aisle twice during the break, and every time I saw her get up, I lowered my head and pretended to take notes to avoid any possible eye contact with her. It always made me feel guilty that she must have needed comfort to ease her mood after recovering from a serious illness, and I kept running away. This thought seemed to be caused by her attitude towards me, but the more time I went on, the more I felt that it was out of a kind of selfish self-preservation.

That meeting gave me a job to go on a business trip to the seaside city where I had stayed. Before leaving, I specifically sought out Yingxiu, who had become an important high-level figure in the traditional pastry shop, and the number of stores in the city had increased to 17, and there were more than 20 in several nearby cities, and the development momentum was booming. He was so busy that he didn't even have Saturdays and Sundays, and he only slept five hours a day. When I met him, he was as thin as a skeleton, and everyone who saw him had to sweat for his life, as if he would be lifted up by the air and float in the air at any moment.

"How did you become like this?" I said, "Don't stay up all night." ”

"That's how life should be. He said, "You are going in this direction too." ”

I told him I was going on a business trip to the city by the sea where we had stayed, and asked him if there was anything I needed me to bring to that city, and that we had never been back since we left, and that he had been there longer than I did, and that he should have more things to bring back to that city than I did. He said he had little affection for the city, and that the only thing he missed was the room he lived in, which he had spent too long caring for and making it his home. He thinks that I am too sentimental to walk around, or I will be crushed by the past when I am old, and that the cause of my old age and decay or death is not age or physical decline, but the burden of memories and the past. I said I was only on a business trip, not deliberately with any purpose, and that everything was under my control.

"In the first two years you were in that city, there was the Typhoon of the Century and the Blizzard of the Century. He said: "Don't go back this time and don't have another tsunami of the century." ”

When I left the city, he said this to me when he took me to the station, and I was very impressed. Now that he's bringing it up again, I think he, like me, has a sense of heaviness that I have to admit about that city. And he called me in the early hours of the morning to tell me that he was leaving the city, and I always remember it, but I never knew what made him suddenly decide to leave. I think the reason why he suddenly decided to leave that city was also what made him reluctant to face that city again.