And this girl in the dance hall, from this distance and this angle, really looks like Hai Linlin, I can't find anything on her body that doesn't look like Hai Linlin. I think that if she wore a black sweater and black pants and made a straight-up gesture with her hands supporting her waist, it would definitely make her breasts look unusually straight. As the next black light dance was about to begin, the lights in the ballroom dimmed and I saw a man step out of the crowd and take her hand. She glanced at him, then walked towards the dance floor together. Until the lights are completely dimmed and the music changes to the soft style of the black light dance.

I remembered the scene that was happening on the dance floor, the pain that Shanghai Linlin brought to me a long time ago in the graduation exhibition, and the film of memories in my mind reflected one picture after another, Hai Linlin's slender figure, slender arms and legs, the silhouette of the light when she left the exhibition venue, the silhouette of her walking alternately when she left the exhibition venue, the figure of her coming when I was waiting for her by the garden of the campus, and the blurred shadow of the dormitory window when I saw her for the last time. At that moment, I not only remembered Hai Linlin, but also those distant past events that happened on the university campus away from me. I think of them often, but not so clearly and thoroughly, and those memories are usually too fragmented, like they are in different boxes in my brain, and I can't always find the key to open them. This dancing girl who looks like Hai Linlin is the key, and when all the boxes are opened, all the memories are spliced together.

When the lights came on slowly, I tried my best to find the dancer who looked like Helenlin, a group of men and women coming out of the dance floor, too cluttered for me to find. It was a long time before I saw her in the back row of the dancers, standing there, waiting for the next man to go on the dance floor with her. I wanted to go up and talk to her, but I didn't have the desire to dance with her, and it was like I had copied the feeling I had for Helen. I've never had any sexual fantasies about her, I've always thought she's so wonderful — and she's so wonderful to me.

At this time, Yingxiu turned his head and said to me that he would go again, he threw a cigarette on the ground, stepped on it a few times, and then got up and walked to the dancer, I saw him pull up the dancer with heavy makeup and walked into the dance floor, and at the same time, the dancer who looked like Hai Linlin was also taken in by a middle-aged man.

We stayed inside for more than two hours, and I never left my seat since I found the girl who looked like Helenlin, and whenever the lights came on, I tried to find her. There were a few times when I didn't find her, but most of the time I saw it, and not every time the light was dark, a man went to ask her to dance, and every time I found out that no one took her to the dance floor to dance, I would feel sad for her, and I would feel lucky. Twice, I saw him walking towards the dancer who looked like Hai Linlin, and the dancer went to see him, and my heart hung in the air, for fear that he would take the dancer's hand and enter the dance floor, put his hand into her secret parts, and then come back to sit next to me after the light was on, and stretched out his middle and ring fingers for me to smell. But fortunately, he took the dancers to her left and right both times.

Seeing a strange man take her hand and go on the dance floor, I can bear it somewhat, but not for Yingxiu, who has a very good relationship with me, people are so strange. For a moment, I even felt that Yingxiu had discovered the secret of my heart, and when the lights came on, I would try my best to scan the men and women coming out of the dance floor, and then lock my eyes on one person. Such an obvious move can be detected with a little observation. I think Yingxiu must have noticed that I was watching a certain dancer, and then deliberately walked towards her and took the one next to her. I feel that my secret has been discovered by the people I know best, and Yeong-su has discovered not only that I am looking at a certain dancer, but also that she must have discovered the deepest secret about me hidden behind this dancer. I haven't told anyone about my Hai Linlin's story, and I'm on good terms with Yingxiu, but he doesn't know anything about Hai Linlin—I'm sure so. When I saw the casual look on his face when he came out of the ballroom, and the lazy body half lying in his seat, I was sure he didn't know.

Some secrets are always secrets, and these secrets can never be forgotten, but they can't be spoken, they can only rot in the stomach.

After the last black dance, the patrons almost dispersed, the men disappeared incredibly, the dancers went to the dressing room to change their usual clothes, and the ballroom cleaners and security guards began to clean up. The girl, who resembled Helenlin, did not change her clothes, but walked straight away after most of the men had left.

Yingxiu has also been urging me to go, I really want to follow the girl who looks like Hai Linlin and see where she lives, I believe that her home is definitely not in this city. She must rent a house in this city to see where she lives, whether it is a private house in an urban village or a high-end community, knowing where she lives, you can also have a certain understanding of her living grade or social status. I'm not a gossip person, and I don't like to inquire and intervene about other people's privacy, and I've never thought about stalking someone. But for this girl, I was eager to know everything about her.

It's just that I never thought of this girl as Helenlin, and I'm convinced that they just resemble each other too much.

But Yingxiu was with me, and I had to give up the idea in order to prevent him from discovering the secret.