"Everyone feels different, especially the first impression, there are benefits to speaking straight, but in this environment, if you meet someone you don't know, it's best to talk about it when you understand what kind of personality the other person is.dt.com ◎," Huo Guangming said.

"The wise man is good at condescending, the reckless man is strong, find his own position, don't act offside, the person who tortures you is the person who promotes your growth, the qualification is not enough, don't rush to come out, control the anger, swallow a breath, keep a low profile, is a smart way of life. Zhou Jun said.

"It's also said that you can't block the road, you have to be more tactful in dealing with people, and you know how to be sophisticated, which does not mean that you wear a mask to treat life, and be properly mellow, not only can make the other party very happy, but also meet your communication needs in interpersonal communication. Huo Guangming said.

Dealing with people and things is smooth, this is a process of accumulation, and it is also related to people's character. The tactfulness in the work should be measured, the principle of the issue should be cautious, should not be responsible, really responsible, to do a good record, detailed and good, standby, on the surface for the superior to be responsible, private to keep a hand. Try to carry the flag of the wind as much as possible for small things, say more words of praise, don't really hit the hard, things that have little to do with you, try not to express your position, don't speak.

"If you are not tactful, it means that you don't know much about society, and when you experience more things, you will naturally integrate into society. There is no need to learn from others, because you can't learn, social experience depends on yourself to slowly experience, talk to people, leave a little leeway in the words, don't say it to death, give both sides room to maneuver, and seek common ground while reserving differences. This kind of communication is flexible, and it is also in line with human rationality, and it is easier to achieve good results. Zhou Jun said.

Speaking up is not only a virtue, but also a good interpersonal communication. When: Speak out to persuade each other, when you are worried about joy and anger, when you speak out, when you look at the situation. Good words are warm in three winters, and bad words are hurtful and cold in June. The wine is known to be a thousand glasses less, and the words are not speculative for more than half a sentence. Grasp the proportion, blunt words are good words, without scruples, blunt words become nonsense. Not only is there no communication between people, but I am afraid that there are just more obstacles.

If the words are forced to force each other and leave no space to say the words absolutely, it is equivalent to blocking your own back road, and the relationship between the two parties is also stiffened, even if you are the best friends, you are intimate, and you don't distinguish between each other. It is easy to blur people's personalities, lose their self-interaction, and lose their original meaning. Scheming people understand. If you want to gain a foothold in society, you must make friends with masters, but if you only care about one place and the rest, one day you will fall down the mountain and the wall will fall down and everyone will push you, and you will put yourself in danger. People who have no long-term plans must have near-term worries, and there must be room at all times. The so-called thirty years of Hedong. In the past 40 years in Hexi, in this era of rapid development, everything is changing, the change of human feelings and sophistication is undoubtedly faster, and the space for social survival will become smaller and smaller.

There is an ancient saying. When looking for money when traveling, it also interprets that there is room to gain momentum and not forget to lose power, leave room for retreat, human feelings are sophisticated, grievances and grievances must leave room for right and wrong, leave a line of human affection, and see each other in the future, raise children to prevent old age, hoard grain to prevent hunger, bring umbrellas in the sun, and leave room for hunger and so on. In fact, leaving room for people is not only a virtue, but also a kind of wisdom, and people who know how to leave room will have a far-sighted vision, think deeply, and think long-term about everything. If you say things decently and do things decently, the world is open, and your heart is high and you have a long way to go. In short, a person's life is more than 100 years, less than a few decades, not long, not short, things in the world are like Du Fu's poems, the clouds in the sky are like white clothes, and the changes are like dogs. There are too many changes, so there is room to do anything, don't do things all at once, it is equivalent to blocking your own road, the blocked road is not good for anyone, only leave room to save the embarrassing situation, only to have room for maneuver, to achieve balance, symmetry and harmony, to achieve calmness, and to stretch arbitrarily.

"As the saying goes, close to the gentleman, don't get close to the villain, rather offend the gentleman than offend the villain, the gentleman has a belly, even if he is offended, he can treat you objectively and fairly. Ke Liang said.

Villains have small bellies and chicken intestines, and sometimes they offend them inadvertently, and once they offend them, they fall into the whirlpool of right and wrong, and it is difficult to get out. This kind of villain has little contact, can only laugh and laugh, can't have deep friendships, and don't have conflicts with him head-on, it's best to avoid it from afar. Try not to provoke this kind of person, when you encounter this kind of person, just hiding is not a way, because this kind of person will frame people, so you must be vigilant everywhere, don't believe any words said by this kind of person, because this kind of person speaks and does things for a purpose, be careful of being deceived. The ancients said well, it is difficult to draw the skin of the tiger, it is difficult to draw the bones, to know the face but not the heart, to meet people and to say three points, not to throw away a piece of heart, to harm people, to prevent people, not to look good, the sea can not fight, the open gun is easy to dodge, and the hidden arrow is difficult to prevent, all of which teach people to protect themselves.

"If you want to survive in this society, you must protect yourself well, and the best way to protect yourself is not to face your heart, smile every day to face the familiar people, smile is not from the heart of pleasure, but to hide yourself, in order to protect yourself, do not trust others casually, do not treat the first person you meet as a confidant

Life tells me, facts tell me that I can't do this, because you have to think about others, so now you can only do this, every day only to tell the truth to your parents, to the friends you identify, and other people can only say polite words. Huo Guangming said.

"People who are not deeply involved in the world usually feel that they don't know how to deal with all kinds of people in society, and they feel that they talk a lot to their peers. Zhou Jun said.

But there is no topic to talk about with other characters, such as bosses, elders, taxi drivers, etc., and often in some scenes, some people, even first-time acquaintances, seem to talk very speculatively, and you don't seem to have anything to talk about at all. It's normal for this to happen, and everyone starts with this step, and one of the easiest ways is how to talk to friends who are particularly socially savvy, and how to lead to one topic after another. At the beginning, it is to learn to imitate, and at the end, even if something goes wrong, it's okay, stick to it, and in the long run, your communication skills will unconsciously improve by leaps and bounds.

When you reach the state of maturity, you will be more rational about yourself, not despise yourself, but never yourself, you can know the truth and falsehood of the high hat that others wear on you, and you can be confident in what others slander and despise you. On this basis, what to do is basically very measured and learn to plan, and move forward steadily and forcefully. One step higher than maturity is sophistication, a little more advanced than sophistication is treacherous, and a layer stronger than treacherous is that you don't know who he is, this kind of person is called human spirit. Of course, there is nothing wrong with being a human spirit, in a relationship society, it is easier to walk freely in the crowd, to be able to do things more easily, to get more recognition, to receive more attention and attention, naturally it is better. Those who can talk freely at meetings and before dinners, there will always be a few people, as soon as they appear, open their mouths, and make the atmosphere of this small environment high, and once there is an atmosphere, it is easy to say anything.

"Renjing is seven points of righteousness, three points of partial talent, and Renjing is those who have insight into human nature, are sensitive, communicate accurately, and do things particularly productively. Huo Guangming said.

"That's right, but there are also human spirits that make you bother, and we have a human spirit. Ke Liang said.

It turned out that everyone was afraid of him, he was really powerful, he could say that the square was round, the round was flat, and the good was bad, he could graft his own meaning into someone else's, he could flip and modify what others said multiplied, and turn the facts upside down. There was something in the unit, everyone was in person, and someone called to inform him, but he said that he was too busy to come. The next day, when he came to the unit, someone mentioned the incident of yesterday's unit, and his eyes widened and he claimed that no one had sued him, why didn't he know. Someone said, obviously someone called you, we are all here, how can you say that no one sued you, he hurriedly said, oh, yes, but forgot about it. I really don't know if he has a good brain or a bad one.

Either go to this office, close the door and say that the other person is not good, praise this person for being good, or go to another office and say that the person just now is not, and will say that so-and-so said something about so-and-so. In this way, he was busy and excited all day long shuttling between the employees of the unit, and the employees of the unit would feel embarrassed and angry when they met, but he was happy as if he was fine, and the people who were embarrassed and angry were people who were more knowledgeable than him. A human spirit is a human spirit, and the skin on his face is his best disguise, laughing when he should laugh, crying when he should cry, and angry when he should be angry, just like a face that can be expanded and changed at will. Just now in front of you was smiling and praising how good a certain person is, but when he turned around, he was already scolding or sarcastically scolding or sarcastic, there is no better person than him in his heart.

I don't dare to say much when I talk to him, maybe a few words I didn't want to say to him will become a good article. You may speak unintentionally, but he speaks through the brain, everything he says to you has his purpose, it is all thought out in advance, it is what he wants to learn from you, and after getting words from you, he can make a fuss as he wants. He likes to know everyone's history, know everyone's secrets, figure out everyone's family history, even include the friends around you, as if he knows your family background, he can hold you in the palm of his hand. (To be continued......)