Where is my heart

When I heard this, almost subconsciously, the man's firm and angry voice echoed in my mind

Do you control my heart, which governs the heavens and the earth?

It's almost subconscious, this sentence is about to be exported, but my reason still pulls me Liu San'er said it to the villagers in Jixiang Village who opposed our marriage, but now I am facing Pei Yuanhao, who has the power of life and death over the world, even if he can't kill me now because of the overall situation, who knows what will happen in the future

In the past two days, he and I have been so focused on Miaoyan that I have almost forgotten what the purpose of the time I promised to see him.

I can't offend the emperor too much.

Thinking of this, I pinched the corner of my clothes hard under the table, and was silent for a long time before I slowly said: "My heart is on my body." ”

“”

He was just about to speak, but I raised my head and looked at him with red eyes: "Do you want me to cut it out and show you?"

As soon as he heard this, his originally tight breathing immediately suffocated, and the faint anger on his body suddenly calmed down, he looked at me with complicated eyes, and his voice was a little hoarse: "You know, I don't mean to hurt you. ”

I was secretly relieved.

Pei Yuanhao is shrewd and ruthless, and he is one of the most difficult people I have ever met, but if these people are classified as "men", it is another way to put it.

This level has finally passed.

He continued, "There are just some things that I must sue you."

“”

I bit my lower lip and was silent.

He breathed a sigh of relief, was silent for a moment, and then said slowly: "You don't want to hear it, is it because it's my business with her?"

“”

"But I just want to make it clear to you. ”

Speaking of this, his voice became more and more hoarse, and he was silent for a while before he spoke, and his voice finally returned to a little normal: "I have known her since childhood. ”

“”

"After their family and the former queen Lianzong of Yin He, Mrs. Nangong walked very diligently in the palace, and would take her into the palace every time. ”

“”

"Her temperament is not the same as it is now, she is very noisy, and she likes to climb up and down. Moreover, her laughing voice was very good, light and crisp, every time she came, far away, I could hear her laughter, and every time I heard it, I felt that the weather was good. ”

“”

"At that time, we didn't talk about male and female love, but our brothers really liked her very much, and they also circled around her every day. ”

I slowly raised my head to look at him, the original full of calculations and scheming were all in vain at this moment, looking at the soft light brought by the memories on his face, as well as the soft eyes, I couldn't harden my heart for a while, I was silent for a long time, and said softly: "I don't know, it turns out that the concubine was like that when she was a child." ”

He glanced at me, his eyes slightly darkened: "Sometimes, even I am almost forgotten." ”

My heart moved slightly, and I looked at him silently.

Then, he continued: "Later, as I grew older, I began to know people. ”

“”

"Although the brothers like her very much, and the former queen and Mrs. Nangong seem to have the intention of letting her get closer to Yuan Xiu, it backfired, and she and I are the closest. Do you know why?"

I thought for a moment and said, "If there is no her by other people's side, there is still a mother, but by the side of His Majesty, there is only her." ”

His eyes flickered, and he looked at me for a long time before he smiled softly.

He said to me, "Isn't it at that time, if it wasn't for her, but for you, you would be like this, by my side"

I was slightly stunned, thought for a while, and said, "Don't say that. ”

“”

"What happens is irreplaceable. ”

“”

"What Majesty thinks is false, but once that person was by His Majesty's side, she was real. ”

Hearing me say this, his face was also slightly shocked, but he was not angry or angry, just a little gloomy, silent for a while, and nodded lightly: "You are right, the person who accompanied me at that time was her, no matter what, it was her." ”

I nodded my head too.

Then, I asked, "What about later?"

"Later," he looked at me, as if awakened from a heavy dream, and said, "Later, in the year of her life, I also did the gift of tying my hair." ”

My heart moved.

Isn't that what Mama Qian told me before, and what the two of them once talked about by themselves, when there was an accident on the grassland

I subconsciously held my breath and looked at him, Pei Yuanhao seemed to have fallen into the original memories, his face became more and more solemn, and said: "That year, I was also hunting in the Juma River Valley. On the first day, the prince shot twelve rabbits, two roe deer, and a deer, but I found nothing. ”

I was a little surprised, after so many years, he even remembered the number clearly, but when I thought about it, I understood that he had been sensitive and suspicious since he was a child, Pei Yuanxiu's scenery as a prince and his gloom that he was not crowned king until he was in his twenties, I was afraid that the contrast was as sharp as mud, how could he not remember

He sighed lightly: "I don't know what to think, I don't know how thick the sky is, so I want to take her to see the world." ”

“”

I probably understand why.

Because he lost too completely, the prince returned with a full load, but he got nothing, if this qiē just fell in the eyes of the emperor, it just fell in the eyes of Nangong Lizhu, but Nangong Lizhu was the candidate for the crown princess that Empress Yin wanted to point out to the crown prince.

I smiled softly: "Young spirit, as it should be." ”

"Then, we met the wolves. ”

“”

Speaking of this, he glanced at me, and I was still immersed in his words just now, and I really knew about the encounter with the wolves, and I was not surprised, he was silent for a moment, and then said: "You already knew"

I raised my head to look at him, thought for a moment, and then said, "Back then, in the Juma River Valley, the folk girl was nearby when His Majesty and the noble concubine Niangniang were chatting by the river. ”

His eyes looked at me without blinking.

After a moment of silence, he said, "I remembered, and later, you met the tiger. ”

I nodded.

He sighed lightly, and then said, "Then you can also guess what happened later." ”

I said, "The old trouble of the concubine"

He nodded again: "It's not good for me, I don't know how thick the sky is, I took her out, I met the wolves, but I didn't know what to do, the horse was eaten by the wolves, and the two of us rolled down the river to escape with our lives." I was covered in wounds, and so was she. ”

“”

"But, that's not the most troublesome, the most troublesome, is that no one finds us. ”

“”

"I've been bleeding, and so has she. ”

I looked at him with a hint of gloom in my eyes.

"We don't stop the bleeding, we don't heal, we just watch our blood flow out little by little, and I feel my body getting cold little by little, no matter how ignorant we are, we know what's going on. ”

“”

"If there was ever a time in this life when I really gave up, it was that day. ”

I said softly: "Your Majesty"

I don't know what kind of desperate situation it would be to be able to give up someone like him, but when I think back to the time I gave up, I seem to be able to understand it.

With no tomorrow in sight, no light around me, the desperate situation he gave me turned out to be something he had experienced.

"But she, she has always refused to give up, she thought she was going to die, but she refused to let me die, every time I wanted to close my eyes, she would wake me up, every time I couldn't support it, she would hold my hand hard, sing to me, and even use her life to continue my life. ”

Use her life to continue his life

I shuddered slightly, looked at Pei Yuanhao, and didn't know what else to say for a while.

Although I have heard the two of them and Mama Qian say about this matter for a long time, I can really understand the predicament that the two of them faced at the beginning, and why Nangong Lizhu is so important in his life

If I were him, in the face of such a woman, I would have nothing else to ask for in this life.

But

I didn't forget what happened later.

In the first year of Zhaosheng, Nangong Lizhu married Pei Yuanxiu, the little lovers who had shared hardships and lived and died together failed to become married, not without a chance, but Pei Yuanhao chose not her, but to take the heir with the prince, and at that time, the future of the two of them was ruined.

I can't help but think about what that woman experienced on the night that changed my life, when I was pressed under the drunk Pei Yuanhao and shouted her name over and over again

She said that that night, she fell in love with the dedicated prince Yuan Xiu.

But in the end, she is in love with her husband or a dedicated man

At this moment, I knew that I shouldn't, but I still couldn't suppress the sourness in my heart, and a mist surged in my eyes, and at this moment, the hand that was clenched into a fist slowly moved over and covered the back of my hand.

I felt a palpitation in my heart, and I hurriedly withdrew my hand, but he took the first step and clenched it.

"Light," he said. ”

“”

I looked up at him, my vision was a little blurry, I couldn't see his expression clearly, but I could also feel his heartache and death at this moment.

No one knows why he and she have come to this point.

He said dumbly: "I am telling you this today, not to explain why I want to send her back, nor to explain why I want to return to you. ”

I looked at him and was silent.

"I owe her a life, I can't bear her in this life"

“”

"But in my heart"