Weibo has exploded!

"Look at the Beijing Spring Festival Gala!"

"What a slap in the face! It's a slap in the face! ”

"I dare to say anything, damn it!"

"I'm convinced too!"

"Teacher Shanshan, you are my goddess! It's the girl of my dreams! How did you get led to another path by a slap in the face? Don't you become a 'slap in the face' in the future, right? ”

"A slap in the face? Burst! ”

"Hahaha!"

"Teacher Shanshan has also been damaged!"

"Dog, it's all a book written by Zhang Ye!"

"If Zhang Ye hadn't made this line, I would have eaten Xiang live!"

"Standing on the stage of the Spring Festival Gala and scolding people openly with sketches, the highest level of scolding is nothing more than that, right? The name of slapping Zhang in the face is really not blown out! ”

"Yes, standing on the stage of the Spring Festival Gala and scolding the street, I can't look at it directly!"

"I used to think that Mr. Zhang's scolding level had broken through the sky, but I didn't expect it to have a new height!"

"Han Li is stupid -!"

"This stupid-, why are you messing with him!"

……

Home. Pen "Fun" Pavilion www.biquge.info

The third sister burst into tears, and while laughing, she patted the armrest of the sofa heavily, clapped it and shouted, "It's amazing!" It's so cool! Scold them! Then scold them! ”

The third aunt couldn't cry or laugh, "This Xiao Ye! ”

The second aunt wiped her sweat and said: "This is a national live broadcast, Xiao Ye, they said so, is it really okay?" ”

Mom spoke, "Don't say it's a national live broadcast." is a global live broadcast, as long as someone provokes him, that kid dares to scold people on stage. You don't know what kind of temper he has? ”

The second sister shouted: "My brother is mighty! ”

……

on stage.

The sketch has already been getting better.

Zhang Ye hurriedly walked over and explained: "Oh, Chief Ma, I didn't mean that, I thought, that one who played ball with the leader became a celebrity next to the leader?" Isn't that enough? ”

Dong Shanshan raised his eyebrows and glanced at him: "Not really?" Hehe, Hao Jian, I'm treating you as my own now! I'll let you see how I, Ma Jingjing, got to where I am today, step by step! "Between words. With a flick of her hand, she flipped through the laptop on the table.

Zhang Ye glanced at it and said in surprise: "Leader's preference map!" ”

Dong Shanshan smiled slightly. His fingers shook in the air, "Let me tell you, I can clearly say each leader's preferences, constellations, blood type, and birth date!" She pointed to the screen, "This." Loves fishing. So I dived into the water and hooked him one by one! ”

Spectator:

"Hanging fish?"

"Poof!"

"Hahahaha!"

Dong Shanshan pointed again, "This, I like to play mahjong, I'll give him a cannon to dismantle!" This, I like to play, I will take my grandfather's relics to him to wear strings, this, like me......" stunned. Dong Shanshan immediately closed the laptop, "So." Hao Jianna......"

"Hahahaha!"

"Like you?"

"Oops, hahahaha!"

The audience burst into laughter!

Zhang Ye was also happy, "Eh, you will wait and wait, how can this be covered in the key place, this is what I want to hear the most!" ”

"Hahahaha!"

"Good!"

"Good!"

The audience applauded!

Dong Shanshan's eyebrows danced: "So, you know how I got into this position now, right?" ”

Zhang Ye nodded vigorously and said, "I know, otherwise you are amazing, section chief, your sycophant kung fu is all flowing in your blood!" ”

Audience: "Hahaha! ”

"Who do you say? Who do you say? Dong Shanshan, who had just sat down, was not happy, and pointed at him complainingly: "I said you have this mouth!" ”

Zhang Ye hurriedly said: "Hey, bah, why do you think I can't chat like this?" As soon as I spoke, I made people angry, and I wondered, I found that every time I had a meeting, this leader just nodded and smiled at you, is it because you are more beautiful? ”

Dong Shanshan sat as steady as Mount Tai and smiled proudly, "It's not just that! "Look at him," I tell you, meetings are skillful, as soon as the leader speaks, as soon as he speaks, he throws out his views, I immediately give one, huh? She exaggerated a skeptical expression, "The leader just thought, what's wrong?" Are you questioning me? When he finished, I didn't even know what he was talking about, so I would talk to one ...... Oh!! She showed a look of sudden realization, and her mouth grew!

Audience: "Hahahahaha! ”

Dong Shanshan said with a smile: "I want the leader to feel that I was baptized by his words, and I am fully enlightened!" ”

After listening, Zhang Ye also learned Dong Shanshan's expression and made one, and he suddenly realized something extremely ugly, "Oh! ”

"Poof!"

"It's ugly, hey!"

"Poof!"

The audience laughed!

Many Beijing TV station staff in the audience were also happy, Zhang Ye's sketch, in fact, like the audience, was also heard for the first time, because there was no time to rehearse this sketch!

Zhang Ye admired: "Listen to your words and subvert your outlook on life!" ”

Dong Shanshan said: "So Hao Jian, you not only have to accompany the leader to play a good game, but you also have to make the leader only willing to play with you, so that he thinks of you when he thinks of the ball, and his hands itch when he thinks of you!" ”

Zhang Ye immediately said: "I understand, just let me establish an image of being beaten up, so can I turn positive if I am beaten up?" ”

Dong Shanshan said with a smile: "It's not just a positive change. "Desk," I see, my office will be yours from now on, Section Chief Hao? ”

Zhang Ye hurriedly shook his hand: "Oh, don't, don't, don't, don't!" ”

Dong Shanshan smiled again and said, "Section Chief Hao! ”

Zhang Ye trembled, "Oh, don't don't, don't don't!" ”

Dong Shanshan pulled him to the leather chair, "Section Chief Hao, Section Chief Hao is here, come and sit down, sit down, sit here!" ”

Zhang Ye hurriedly said: "No, no, no! ”

"Feel it!" Dong Shanshan pressed him down.

"No, no, no!"

"Sit down."

"Oh!!"

"Sit down a little longer."

"Oooooooo

Zhang Ye looked enjoyable.

The audience was overjoyed. "Poof!"

Zhang Ye leaned on the chair and didn't know how to get better, "Hey, let's also taste what it's like to be a leader." Eh, this chair is comfortable, no wonder you always sleep when you go to work, if I do this in the future, then I will not sleep with the world? ”

Dong Shanshan smiled and said, "You can sleep as much as you want, Section Chief Hao?" ”

Ringing ringing, the call came.

Dong Shanshan picked it up, "Hey." Ah, Director Yao? Oh, you're coming over now? Okay, okay, oh, that's great. I have good news waiting for you! Hanging up the phone, she laughed, "The bureau-chief will be here soon!" ”

Zhang Ye got up. "Great. Eh, he's here, where are we going to play? ”

Dong Shanshan snapped his fingers, "I've already prepared it for you!" "Take him to the side, where there is a simple table tennis table, "This old bureau-captain has entered, and I have also dealt with his mahjong table, ha, what about the future." You play with me, and I'll be the referee for you. She set up a table tennis net. These props are all specially made, "Haha, Hao Jianna, this is not an ordinary table tennis table for you, this is the ladder of your life!" She used a funny tone of Northeast dialect.

Audience: "Hahahahaha! ”

Zhang Ye shook the other party's hand, "Your nobleman, Section Chief Ma, no, Director Ma!" ”

Dong Shanshan hurriedly smiled and said, "Oh, don't dare to be, don't dare to be!" Section Chief Hao? ”

Zhang Ye smiled cheaply: "Sooner or later, Director Ma!" ”

Dong Shanshan was even cheaper than her, "Oh, I can't help it, Section Chief Hao?" ”

The visitor laughed a few times, then shook hands and said, "Win-win!" Win-win! ”

The audience enjoyed watching it!

"Well acted!"

"These two are so capable! Hahahaha! ”

At this time, the music started.

Dong Shanshan hurriedly lowered his head and put on makeup.

Zhang Ye picked up a table tennis racket and practiced it there!

A ball.

Two balls.

Three balls.

Suddenly, a voice came from outside, shouting: "Who will play table tennis again in the future!" I'll punish whomever I want!! ”

Dong Shanshan froze.

Zhang Ye was also stunned.

The atmosphere of the stage changed all at once!

The audience was delighted.

"Hahahaha!"

"Now it's something to see!"

"Let you two make trouble!"

"The Bureau-Chief is here!"

At this time, Yao Jiancai, who was dressed in a suit and leather shoes, came out, and his hair was mousse, and he looked like a leader.

The audience immediately gave a warm applause!

"Oh, Director Yao, what's wrong?" Dong Shanshan hurriedly went up to greet him, and avoided the director's sight, desperately gesturing over there!

Zhang Ye held the racket, didn't dare to make much movement, and carefully went to hide the racket.

Yao Jiancai also looked different from him when he said cross talk at this moment, speaking very steadily and thickly, "You don't know who it is, I heard that I love to play table tennis, and now some comrades in the bureau have practiced it when they are at work!" What kind of behavior is this? ”

Zhang Ye moved step by step, hurriedly and nervously packed up the table tennis table, and reached out to pick up the net on the table.

The audience was amused!

Dong Shanshan was still covering Zhang Ye, "Eh, Director Yao, it's not a big deal to play table tennis." ”

Yao Jiancai said with a straight face: "Playing table tennis itself is nothing, but if you use it to your liking, this is a crooked trend!" As soon as he turned around, he happened to see Zhang Ye holding a table tennis net.

The audience burst out laughing, "Hahahaha!" ”

As a result, Zhang Ye's next action made the audience laugh!

Zhang Ye was stunned, stretched out his hand, hung the table tennis net around his neck, pinched it, and threw it back like a scarf!

"Hahahaha!"

"Oops, hey!"

"Good!"

"Good!"

The audience applauded!

Yao Jiancai walked over with his hands behind his back and squinted at him, "Scarf? He tugged at something around his neck, "And the weights?" ”

Zhang Ye quibbled: "The wind is strong, my mother is afraid of losing it." ”

Audience: "Ahahahaha! ”

Dong Shanshan hurriedly came over to relieve the siege, "Hey, this is a new little comrade from our unit, come, bureau chief, sit down and say, sit down and say." She flatteringly helped him over.

Yao Jiancai sat on the sofa, looked at Dong Shanshan, and said, "Section Chief Ma, you are an old comrade, there is a problem with this work style in our unit, should you take the lead?" ”

Dong Shanshan immediately sat up straight, and said righteously: "I said them!" I said that even if you practice again, you can't hit the level of Director Yao, Director Yao is in the original unit, and he is a champion every year! ”

"Eh, don't compliment me!" Yao Jiancai's tone paused and said, "...... One year it was the runner-up. ”

This made a group of people laugh again!

"Poof!"

"Hahahaha!"

"Lao Yao is really enough!"

After that, Yao Jiancai sighed: "Actually, this table tennis, I don't play very well!" Tell me, how did I get the championship every year? With a wave of his hand, "It's all water!" ”

Dong Shanshan patted his ass and said: "It can't be all water, didn't you just say that you have to be the runner-up for a year." ”

Yao Jiancai looked at her and nodded, "Yes." Then he paused, "I was the deputy director that year!" ”

The audience laughed so hard that their stomachs hurt!

"Hahahaha!"

"Oh, I can't do it!"

"Your mom, that's so funny!"

"Coldness is a burden! Hahaha! ”

"It's so enjoyable!"

……

Offstage.

A work area not far from the stage.

Chang Xiaoliang didn't laugh from beginning to end, and many other people in the director team were similar, not that this sketch was not funny, but that they had forgotten to laugh at all, but they were all looking at Zhang Ye, Dong Shanshan and Yao Jiancai who were performing on the stage with a stunned gaze!

They were really shocked!

Chang Xiaoliang was silent for a long time and looked at the side, "Are you sure they have never acted in a sketch?" ”

The deputy chief director smiled wryly, "I really haven't acted!" ”

Chang Xiaoliang asked again, "Are you sure this is a sketch that Teacher Xiao Zhang just made on the spot an hour ago?" ”

Another female assistant director said: "Yes, it was made within this hour, I asked them, Mr. Zhang actually didn't have a sketchbook at all before, it was all made up by him just now!" ”

"Then there's one thing I want to know right now!" The more Chang Xiaoliang spoke, the more excited he became, the more excited he became, "For an hour, I am writing a notebook and memorizing lines, three bloody laymen who have never acted in a sketch, and they don't even have time for a formal rehearsal, why...... Will you make such a wonderful sketch!? ”

Director: "......"

No one can answer him!

Because they don't know it either!

This is simply incomprehensible to them!

Let Zhang Ye save the scene, there is purely no way out, it is purely a dead horse as a live horse doctor, to be honest, Chang Xiaoliang They only hope that Zhang Ye can finish the show, but they never thought that Zhang Ye could make a classic, because everyone knows that it is impossible! But as soon as this "Do What You Like" came out, they were all a little confused! This works...... It's so mature! Where does this look like it was created on an improvised basis? Where can these be three laymen who have never acted in a sketch at all? Characters, performances, books, funny points, rhythm, ideas, depth, all there!

This is clearly a CCTV Spring Festival Gala-level sketch!!

Is this Zhang Ye?

Is this Zhang Ye after getting serious?

Looking at the entire music industry, looking at the entire entertainment industry, who else!? (To be continued.) )