A month after the breakup, I still didn't dare to accept this fact.

Just like in the first few days, I refused to believe it, and even comforted myself that she should be joking with me. But I didn't even dare to make a phone call, I was afraid that she would admit it, and even refusing to answer would make me uneasy.

For the first time in my life, I was afraid of something, I told myself that it wasn't true, and I thought that when I went back at the end of the next few days, she would wait for me at the airport as usual, with a bunch of snacks, and said, Roy Roy, you're back, I'll tell you......

But after all, no one told me that when I went back, the airport was full of people, but there was no her.

I had insomnia almost every night for those nights, and I always dreamed of her when I was asleep, and she smiled and called my name, and said this and that beside me. But waking up from a dream is classified as silence.

I've never been afraid of loneliness, I'm afraid that this loneliness can't be calculated, it's impossible to measure.

Who would have thought that someone who would hold you tightly with his legs and hands before you went on a business trip and wouldn't let you leave, someone who said that he would miss you very much after being separated for so long, would say to you so lightly to break up.

Who would have thought that a person who cried tears when he broke up and disregarded his image would be so resolute, changed his mobile phone, took a break from school, and didn't give you any chance to contact.

So it's so hard for you to get an explanation, it's so hard for you to want an explanation.

How did the next four years go.

I don't have the pain of every day, I don't get drunk, but I always feel that life is a little boring, and something is missing.

I started to get busy, I began to accept the company's arrangement, and sometimes I wondered if it was because I lost, so God had mercy on me and treated me well.

Occasionally, I couldn't eat on time because of work, and even had a minor illness, at that time, I thought, will there be a Xue Lingyi just out of thin air, she crossed her waist and said, You don't take good care of yourself. And then she'd grin at me and say it's not going to work without me, right, right.

Right.

I miss her the most, I think I can't bear it, I want her to come back, no matter what the reason, as long as she sues me, I will forgive her.

Later, life ran according to the normal trajectory, and I began to get used to it, to the qiē around me, to the fact that no one was talking in my ear.

There is a "010101" among the fans, I have been quietly following her since she followed me, I don't know if this person has a connection with Xue Lingyi, maybe she is a zombie fan, after all, she only has a few words in Weibo, not even an avatar.

Later, I found out that it really was.

Like she said, in the dark, we will meet, and I have seen her among thousands of people.

So is it so that she sees me? As my fame began to surface, she could see it.

Even sometimes, when I am fragile and sensitive in the middle of the night, I think, Xue Lingyi, do you regret that I am so good now, you see what kind of excellent person you gave up, how many people want to get close to me but have no chance.

So did you see that.

I worked hard, I got a lot of awards, a lot of people congratulated me happily or hypocritically in the audience, and the smiles on their faces always had a deep meaning.

I always like to think too much, and the emptiness after joy is even more lonely, looking down through the window, I want to find someone to share with me.

That's right, I miss her, I miss her.

Time didn't dilute anything, but it made me feel guilty when I thought back, if I had to do it all over again, I should have been kind to her and be patient, but in the end, it was me who regretted it.

I think she would be very happy when I won the award, she would be happier than me, she would cheer more than me, as if she had gotten a qiē, and she would jump around me and say that she wanted to eat something delicious.

But what's the use of these, you're alone, where is she?

Yes, what's the use, in the end, this qiē is not as good as a Xue zero one.