A year ago, I was still wondering if I should give up my job and go back to China as soon as possible.

A year later, I no longer had the courage to guess whether Yu Tianai loved me or not.

During the whole call, I let myself be very calm, from beginning to end, there was no trembling tone, and when Yu Tian said that he still had something to do, he hung up the phone. The hand I was holding the phone began to tremble, and my breathing felt like it was stuck somewhere in my chest.

I called 119 myself that day and rushed myself to the hospital, and when I woke up, the doctor told me that I would suddenly feel difficult to breathe and even coma because of the excessive formaldehyde in my newly moved apartment. I smiled helplessly, it turned out that I was still so useless.

Song Qing brought his little girlfriend to see me, and the two of them looked at me sympathetically, and their every move was very tacit.

I was lying in a hospital bed with a sling needle hanging and was told it was best to stay in the hospital for a few days. Look, I can't go back even if the flight resumes. Will the heavens take me, or will the rest of the heavens be collected?

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, wishing someone could tell me what to do now. Whether to give up silently, or to leave your pride behind and ask him what really happened.

What if, again, this is another misunderstanding? < Le couldn't reach him. He even quit his job, and before leaving, he only said that he wanted to relax.

I never imagined that one day he would literally disappear from my life without a sound.

After I was discharged from the hospital, I went back to China once, but there was only one week left on the vacation, I didn't find the remaining days, and the password of the apartment was changed. I tried to go to the places we frequented, and once sat in front of his door and waited for a day and a night. In addition to inquiring about Cheng Jiajia's address and phone number, I did everything else I could. On the day of my return trip, I wrote down what I wanted to say on a card and stuffed it through the crack in the door.

"Yu Tian, I wonder why you suddenly decided to get married. If this is what you really think, then I will bless you. If there are other reasons, can you tell me, I will wait for your reply, and in three months, I will resign and return to China when the work is over. I'm sorry I failed your love and your goodness. ”

I don't know why, I always believe that Yu Tian won't bring Cheng Jiajia here, so the card won't be seen by her.

But even so, I still felt a little guilty in my heart. So there's one thing I wanted to say that I didn't end up writing about, and that is that I love you.

I love Yu Tian and get it confirmed again. It took me two years to confirm that I still love Yu Tian, and his place in my heart has long been irreplaceable, but I still don't know how I should love him.

If there is one person in this world who I can trust completely and teach me how to love, I think he is probably the only one.

For the next three months, I continued to pay attention to any information about Yu Tian, but such information was practically non-existent, and I sent him several emails and finally received no response. At the end of the first phase of the international student program, I handed in my resignation letter like Professor Oshima. He frowned in regret and asked me why I didn't want to stay? Although in Japan, it is actually the Chinese who help.

I said, there are many more people who can help.

The second trip to Japan has finally come to an end, and it has been two and a half years since Yu Tian and I agreed to separate. Lin actually asked me if I regretted not staying in the first place.

I kept my head down and didn't say anything, in fact, I still regretted it. It's just that I understand that if I had stayed, Yu Tian would have tolerated everything about me, and I might not be able to bring him happiness, maybe I would be a burden to him, even if he didn't mind, but I would still stab him. Maybe one day, he can teach me how to love and resolve the pain between us, but I have always missed a chance to grow independently.

Maybe that's why he didn't keep me in the first place.

Maybe we'll all regret it, and if we go back in time, we'll make the same choice.

After returning to China, I joined a non-profit organization in China under the recommendation of Professor Oshima, and my work was not too busy, and every weekend I would take Lin Jing back to the small village where Yu Tian grew up. Lin actually complained about this, and I still have some lingering feelings about what happened by the river before, but I remember that Yu Tian likes the children here very much, so every time I come, I will bring a lot of gifts. I didn't like children before, but after Junko's daughter was born, I gradually discovered that these little things also have a cute side. I will also think of the little boy next to Yu Tian, if it is really Yu Tian's child, then I will definitely not disturb them again.

People in the village said that Yu Tian had never come back, and I went to Yu Tian's grandmother's house, and it was indeed a long time since it had been cleaned. Every time I come, I will also tidy up the house by the way, and leave a note for Yu Tian by the way, but the next time I come, the note is still left there as it is, and then the paper is thicker and thicker, but there is no trace of turning.

< le is there, the bride is naturally the little Japanese girl, the wedding is going to be held in China, I became a bridesmaid without knowing it, Song Qing said that it is more convenient for me to communicate with his girlfriend, please I must help with this. I agreed to be a bridesmaid for the second time, and it is said that if I do it more than three times, I will not be able to get married.

I was alone in a daze at the moon at night, in this life, can I really marry Yu Tian? Looking at the invitation card in my hand, I also remember that I once said to Yu Tian that you must not marry someone else.

The wedding is scheduled for a month later, but Song Qing's girlfriend still has an exam, so she can't come over a week before the wedding, she asked me on the phone to find a few more makeup artists to try on for her first, so in those days Chunzi and I often run around in the wedding dress shop, the two of them take turns sitting there and be fiddling with the makeup artist, women love beauty by nature, although this task is tiring, but Junzi and I are also happy, when the makeup is to wear a wedding dress, so Junzi and I have to try on it in the past few days, of course, These makeup artists also have to charge when trying on clothes, so Song Qing always follows us as a mobile bank.

In fact, it's only when I'm busy these days that I don't miss the rest of the day so much.

That day, Song Qing's groom gift arrived, and I happened to stand with him after I came out of the wedding dress, and the photographer in the wedding dress shop immediately ran over to take pictures, and pointed to the floor-to-ceiling window next to it and asked if I could put two of them there.

Song Qing and I shook our heads at the same time and told the photographer that he was mistaken, and that we were not a couple.

It's just that I'm always a little absent-minded, and when they were chatting, I looked at the floor-to-ceiling window that the photographer had just pointed to.

Just now, I seem to have seen Yu Tian.

But could it be a delusion?

When I changed out of my wedding dress and chased out, I didn't find Yu Tian at all.

At this time, Junko also changed into a wedding dress and came out, and the photographer looked at the three of us, a groom and two brides, it was indeed not an ordinary combination, and finally believed that Junko and I were just trying on makeup for the real bride. The makeup and hairstyle that day were really suitable, and after sending the photos over, Song Qing's girlfriend was sure that she wanted this makeup artist, and she could try it again after she came. < there was no news from Yu Tian, they still shook their heads silently as before.

The longer Yu Tian disappeared, the more uneasy we became, as if he had disappeared instead of going to relax. < Le's phone.

He said, "Yu Tian is back." ”

I squeezed my phone hard, and the feeling of suffocation gradually returned, and it took a long time for me to calm my breathing, "Did he say anything?" ”

"No, he only stayed for a few minutes before leaving, and I wanted to tell him that you've been looking for him, but ......" < Le seemed to want to say something, and he stopped talking.

I asked, "What's wrong?" ”

What < le wanted to say just now must be related to Yu Tian, so could it also be related to Cheng Jiajia? They have been engaged for more than half a year, and maybe, they are about to get married.

I didn't think about it anymore, otherwise I would cry and have swollen eyes to be a bridesmaid.

The wedding went smoothly the next day, although it was raining rain in the evening, but we had already brought the ceremony forward two days ago, and the wedding was completely over at 3pm. And although I was in a low mood, I was thankful that I didn't show it at all. After the wedding, some of the guests went home, some played in the resort, and in the end I was the only one standing in the venue, just when the bouquet was tossed, they intended to give me the flowers, but in the end it was me who held the flowers alone, looking at the empty lawn after the wedding, there were only some scattered petals and colored stripes on the ground, and someone would come to clean them up later.

Before the rainstorm came, I was dragged out of the venue by Lin Jing.

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