The sky was getting dark, and I was still trying to describe Xiao Ai's appearance to the staff guarding the cemetery, but he told me with certainty that he had never seen this girl at all, and he also criticized me for being too subjective and deliberately exaggerating Xiao Ai's beauty. I insisted that I wasn't exaggerating, so he told me with more certainty that he hadn't seen it.

I finally gave up the insistence I had just made, and then I felt that I was making a bit of a fuss, just a bouquet of flowers, anyone could give it, why did I have to lock it on Xiao Ai's body. I went to see Mr. Xiao a few days ago, and what he meant was that he let her leave the city of Nanjing out of protection for Xiao Ai, so how could the person who came here be her?

I should downplay what happened, and get out of here peacefully, I don't really like my reaction to be so aggressive, in my subconscious, the more time passes, the less painful Xiao Ai's departure should be, not like now, the grass and trees are all soldiers.

I went back to my grandmother's tombstone, straightened the wind-blown lilies again, and set them up on the altar. After a moment of silence, he whispered, "Grandma, I'm coming to see you again, but this time it's good news...... I deliberately rushed back from Shanghai because Zhao Mu came back from abroad, and he stayed in Nanjing to work in the future...... It's a pity that I may stay in Shanghai for a long time this time, but I will always go back to live in Nanjing...... Grandma, you know what? This time I went to Shanghai, I was not blind, I actually have a lot of plans in mind, I want to do a good job first...... I don't want to live in the shadow of failure all the time. When everything returns to a normal state, I will go back to Nanjing, and then marry and have children here, this idea should not be negative, right? ”

Speaking of this, I smiled, but when I thought about going back to Nanjing, I felt that my energy would be drained, because everything had to start from scratch, but many people and buildings were no longer there.

I also wanted to talk to my grandmother about Yang Qu or Jin Qiu, or even Xiao Ai, but I didn't choose to speak for a long time. In the end, he just looked at the bouquet of lilies that I don't know who sent them, and then left the cemetery.

I did subjectively want to forget Xiao Ai, so I chose to avoid talking about it in front of my grandmother's tombstone, and everything about us is like a reincarnated autumn, everything starts in autumn, everything ends in autumn, because time has been dragging our footsteps forward, but we have chosen two completely different paths. I was overwhelmed, she was nowhere to be found......

Standing at the gate of the cemetery, I waited for a long time and did not wait for the car to come and go. At this time, I began to miss Yang Qu, and I envied her for keeping pace with the times and using taxi software. I'm a stubborn antique, and in my mind, a taxi comes or doesn't come by chance, rather than grabbing or tipping to attract me, and I don't like to expose my position on a public platform, which can easily make me feel like I've lost my fixed direction.

The sky was getting darker and darker, and he felt that there was no hope for him waiting for the car, so he finally took out his mobile phone from his pocket, and then found Chen Yi's number. I remember that I haven't called her for a long, long time because of such trivial matters.

After a while, Chen Yi answered my phone, her voice was still as kind as before, and she asked, "Is there something wrong, Jiang Qiao." ”

"Do you have time now?"

"I'm going to visit Wang Ze's parents tonight, I'm already on my way, do you have anything to do?"

I was stunned for a moment, because I didn't expect the progress between her and Wang Ze to be so fast, I whispered back in the sound of the rain that I couldn't stop: "No, nothing...... Go about your business. ”

"Are you sure you can handle it?"

"It can be done."

Chen Yi didn't ask much, she hung up the phone the next moment, but I held the phone, and it took a long time to remember that the call was over......

I let myself put my hand down in a calm mood, and then looked at the rain-soaked roads in the distance, as if they had lost their end in the dark night. And that's where my loneliness comes from......

After standing for a while, I finally remembered to make a phone call to others, but it seemed that everyone was very busy, Qiao Ye went abroad, Qin Miao was in Beijing, and Zhao Mu and Yu Xin were not convenient to disturb, because the protagonists of today's party were them, and the two of them had a lot of friends in their respective circles after a year of business after graduation, so they couldn't pull away, and if I insisted on letting any of them come, it would make me feel a little unfamiliar.

I exhaled, and then I chose a path I knew, and under the streaked light, I walked in the direction where there was no end in sight...... But my mood is like those leaves blown off by the wind, some are tired, some are eager to be dried by the sun after the sunny day, and then burn it clean.

……

After about forty minutes, maybe an hour, I finally came to a place where I could get a taxi.

After returning to the hotel, I hurriedly changed out of my rain-soaked pants and shoes, and took a taxi to the hotel that Zhao Mu and Yu Xin had booked.

The hotel is 5 star and there are a lot of people who come. Among them, there are elites that Zhao Mu met in the construction industry, and Yu Xin's friends in the entertainment industry. However, there is no familiar face with me. It wasn't until I found an inconspicuous corner to sit down that an acquaintance came. But he just nodded and gestured to me, and then walked straight to the table where many leaders of the performing arts group were seated......

That's right, the person who came was Xiao Ai and Yu Xin's common brother Ji Xiaowei.

I was a little bored and didn't want to communicate with the people around me, so I took out my phone and played the game. When I was about to serve the food, my mobile phone suddenly vibrated in my hand, it was a message from Yang Jin. She said: Qiao, I have to go to Shanghai tomorrow to do some business, and if I have time in the evening, I can have a meal with Yang Qu. ”

I replied without any emotion: "I am in Nanjing, I don't know if I can go back tomorrow." ”

"Then when you come back, just give me a call and send a message."

I threw my phone aside, didn't reply to the message, and didn't even have the mood to play the game, just stared out the window at the city that was still raining for a moment, then poured myself a glass of liquor, and then raised my head and drank half a glass.

I don't know why I'm depressed, maybe it has something to do with this rainy day, or maybe there's a more complicated reason, but I don't know very much about it.

When it was almost half past nine, the party was not over yet, and a girl from an performing arts group next to me couldn't stand the boredom, so she picked up her mobile phone and swiped Weibo. After looking at it for a while, she suddenly patted me and said, "I seem to have a bit of an image of you...... If I'm not mistaken, you should be Xiao Ai's ex-boyfriend, right? ”

I looked at her, not denying it, not affirming.

She put her phone in front of me and said, "Did you know? Xiao Ai has recently become popular on social networks, I don't know who posted the video of her performing with Yuan Zhen a few years ago on the Internet, and then it was forwarded by a star who is quite famous in the music industry, and it exploded in a few days......"

I just took a look, and there really is a Weibo that has been forwarded nearly 10,000 times, and the person in the video is undoubtedly Xiao Ai, who is standing behind Yuan Zhen, skillfully playing the bass. Her white shirt looks particularly clean in the crowd, and her unsmiling but beautiful appearance gives people a strong visual impact in an instant...... And this is the first time I've seen this video that wasn't shot professionally...... So much so that I lost my mind for a long time - it turned out that this was what she and Yuan Zhen looked like before I met her.

At this time, the girl from the performing arts group seemed to say to me again: "What's the use of being hot!" People don't know where they're going...... However, I really envy her, she is a woman who has never been in the rivers and lakes, but the rivers and lakes have her legends...... How can it be like us, even if we stay in a small place like the performing arts group, we have to worry that we will not pass the assessment at the end of the year, and we will have to roll up and leave! ”

I finally took her words and said, "Sometimes life is not like this, you may not get what you want, and you basically don't get what you want!" ”

The girl glanced at me, and suddenly replied negatively: "It's really boring to live!" ”

I was afraid that I would get into trouble, so I hurriedly persuaded: "Others can think so, but you really don't need it!" ”

"Why do you say that?"

"You don't look like a person who will remain mediocre for the rest of his life, maybe the opportunity hasn't come yet."

The girl was a very persuasive person, and as soon as I said this, she immediately became happy again, and she thought that I knew how to fool people, and asked me to show her palmistry, but I left on the pretext that I was going to the bathroom, and never went back.

……

Back at the hotel, I lit a cigarette and lay on the bed, and then watched Xiao Ai's video over and over again, which I don't know who exposed it, until I saw the illusion that she was right next to me and didn't go far, so I threw my phone aside, and there were several cigarette butts stuffed in the ashtray.

Just when I was about to pick up my phone and look at it again, a call came in, I pressed the cigarette in my hand to extinguish it, and then looked at the number, this time it was Chen Yi calling.

I exhaled and calmed down for a moment before I smiled and asked, "How is it, is it okay to go to meet my future parents-in-law?" ”

"It's good, they're all kind, and there's no arrogance, but I'm a little nervous."

"Being nervous means you care...... I want to ......"

I held back the words I was about to say, I wanted to say that she finally found the man she liked this time, but I don't know why she just couldn't say it.

Chen Yi chased and asked, "What do you want?" ”

"I forgot, I don't know how to get it lately, and I always forget what I want to say...... Maybe it's because I'm too tired. ”

Chen Yi smiled, and then said to me: "I will go to Shanghai tomorrow, do you want to follow my hitchhiker?" ”

"Didn't you say you would go the day after tomorrow?"

"There is something that needs to be done a day earlier...... By the way, how are you preparing for your music party? ”

"Don't worry, it's no problem, because it's been held for several years and it's very experienced...... In addition, there will be a lot of musicians who will come after tomorrow, and most of them have works, so you can take this opportunity to test the feasibility of cooperation. ”

"Well, I hope to come out with one or two works and musicians that can make people's eyes shine, so that it will be good for everyone."

"yes, good for everybody."

Chen Yi was silent for a while, I thought she had something to say, but she asked me to rest early, saying that I would get up early tomorrow and set off, and then ended the call. But I didn't get to bed early and wake up as I said on the phone.

I flipped out the video about Xiao Ai and watched it again, and then I lost sleep...... I'm not sure if it's an illusion, I always feel that she standing behind Yuan Zhen, looking at Yuan Zhen's eyes doesn't have that strong love, but she will have a ...... when she looks at me

So, I couldn't figure it out even more: what kind of big reason would it be for her to choose to marry Yuan Zhen, and I am the closest person to her in reality!

...