Leaving the seafood restaurant called "Little Orange", Jin Qiu and I walked along Huandao Road and chatted, and the topic always revolved around the sister and brother who worked in the seafood restaurant.

After walking for a while, we stopped at the nearest reef to the lighthouse, and I lit a cigarette and sat down cross-legged, while Jin Qiu stood beside me, and before we could speak, our trousers were already wet from the splashing water. And this night, in the endless sound of the waves, seems to be composed, one note, one note, is wet.

After a while, Jin Qiu said to me: "Jiang Qiao, I was very touched by what I heard today, I observed your expression at that time, I feel that you still haven't let go of the incident in your heart about the death of Zhao Chu's parents, do you think that it was your aunt who abandoned you, which led to such a bad result...... Your heartache, I saw it at that moment. ”

I didn't look at Jin Qiu, just took a puff of cigarette, then looked at the lighthouse in the distance, and whispered: "Maybe, until now I think about it, I feel very uncomfortable in my heart, although they may not really be because of the addition of me, they went to venture out to fish on a windy day, but I am indeed a burden to them...... I don't know whose fault it is. ”

"It's not your fault anyway, and you don't have to punish yourself for the mistakes made by others, it's not wise...... After leaving Shanghai, you will always post some jokes in your WeChat circle of friends to enjoy life. Yes, you do enjoy it, but I'm afraid it will be empty when you're alone, right? …… Because you are far away from your friends and your loved ones, all the beauty you have gained now is only temporary...... One day, you will also crave the warmth of your family. ”

I finally raised my head and looked at Jin Qiu, and said a little numbly: "Before I was 20 years old, I always longed for ...... But gradually I became numb and didn't want to look forward to it anymore, especially after my grandmother died, I kept forcing myself to adapt to life alone, and now I have done it...... I feel that no matter how many ways loneliness exists in this world, I am sure to adapt to it...... It's not self-confidence, it's habitual. ”

"If it's really like you say...... Why are you so good to Yang Qu? …… I really want to know, have you ever thought about what is the real reason that prompted you to be good for Yang Qu? ”

After I was silent for a long time, I finally shook my head at Jin Qiu, indicating that I hadn't thought about it.

At this time, Jin Qiu sat down beside me, and accompanied me to look at the lighthouse standing on the sea, but it seemed to be on the other side, but now she doesn't smoke anymore, otherwise this person, this smoke, this lighthouse, the artistic conception is not bad......

At this moment, I seemed to see a lot of unpredictable futures, quietly walking towards me.

……

It was late at night, the seaside became extremely cold, I rarely gentlemanly in front of Jin Qiu, I took off my jacket, and then draped it on her, she did not refuse, just like an ordinary woman, hoping to be considerate and cared for by a man. And her heart, like mine, doesn't want to leave the reef where we are sitting because of the cold.

"Jiang Qiao, I'll talk to you about something again, let's leave after talking...... It's cold, don't get cold here. ”

I nodded, subconsciously wanting to smoke another cigarette, but it was confiscated by Jin Qiu the moment I just took out the cigarette case. She said to me, "Aunt Yang will also come to Lianyungang tomorrow afternoon, you can have a good chat...... It's been more than a year since your mother and son were reunited, and it's time to untie some of your knots. ”

I was stunned for a moment before asking, "Why did you tell me when she came to Lianyungang, not herself?" ”

"Maybe I don't want to give you a feeling of being disturbed, or it would be more tactful to convey it indirectly, in fact, she really cares about your feelings, you should be able to feel it."

"Even if we feel it, what can we do, there really is no mother-son relationship between us."

"If you think of this as a problem for yourself, that's fine...... Prove that you also have the idea of improving the mother-son relationship with your aunt. ”

I don't have words because I've been conflicted about it. Many times, I can't figure out what I think, anyway, I always feel that Yang Jin didn't really open up to me, and I didn't want to take the initiative to ask, so our relationship was so close and not far away for more than a year.

After leaving the beach, I took Jin Qiu back to the Gold Coast resort where I was staying, and gave her the keys to one of the houses, and the night was over. However, when I lie in bed and think about this day, I still feel very comfortable, because there is no loneliness, just like a tired traveler who met a cozy little hotel on the road, only a warm room, no wind and rain.

……

A moment later, I received a WeChat message. The person who wrote to me has not been by my side for a long time, but I have never forgotten her, but in my impression, she has hardly taken the initiative to contact me since she got married.

Yes, the person who messaged me was Chen Yi. The content was just a simple greeting, presumably because the news of my withdrawal from the "Dream Tree" reached her through someone's mouth.

I replied, "It's good, just take the time to come out and relax...... What about you, how are you doing abroad? ”

"It's good, too...... It's just living an ordinary life, but there's always something you like to do. ”

I replied with emotion: "yes, isn't this the life you always wanted to live before?" ”

"What about you, are you living the life you want? …… I heard that Xiao Ai is back, I don't know what you think in your heart, and I am not qualified to say anything, just to give you some reminders...... Companionship is the most affectionate confession, so what you should cherish must be someone who will never leave you in your most difficult time. ”

I thought for a moment and replied, "I don't quite understand what you mean. ”

"You know, I just don't want to admit it...... However, Jiang Qiao ...... After all this, it is time for you to understand what the definition of happiness is. Just like me, I used to think that you had to be, but when I really got married, I had a husband who was good to me, I had a stable family, and there were a lot of little things in life, and I felt satisfied...... As for the past that you think you will remember, it won't really bring you anything for the rest of your life...... What do you think? ”

I didn't reply immediately, just looked through the glass at the lighthouse still standing on the sea in the distance, maybe Chen Yi played such a role at this moment, guiding me who didn't understand to accept a new life.

I finally replied, "Thank you for telling me this...... I'll choose carefully. ”

"Hmm...... Actually, I am very grateful to life, it is it that brought Aunt Yang back to you, otherwise I would have been relieved of you...... So when the time is right, you should also try to accept her in the bottom of your heart, some of the past that you can't forget, it's really not that important, what matters is what you're going through now, and those who are going to be with you in the future. ”

Chen Yi has always been a mature woman, but her married life seems to have made her more mature, so what she said is enlightening to me, she probably wants to tell me that compromise does not mean reluctance, and forgetting is not ruthless......

I am grateful that there has been such a woman in my life, we are childhood sweethearts, we have no guesses, we care for each other...... We're not in this together......

……

The next day, I slept in a relaxed state until I woke up naturally, and by the time I got up, it was already noon.

I called Shang Jinqiu to go to the seafood restaurant called "Little Orange", but we didn't eat any more seafood, just ordered two home-cooked dishes, and then made a pot of tea with the tea leaves I brought, and began to enjoy the afternoon when there was still nothing to do.

In the evening, a taxi that could not be more ordinary drove along the roundabout road in front of us, following the work vehicles that had come to the beach to take wedding photos.

Moments later, the convoy continued to drive ahead, and the taxi stopped downstairs at the seafood restaurant, and then Yang Jin walked out of the car with a simple briefcase.

Jin Qiu and I didn't treat her very well, we sat on the balcony on the second floor and waited for her, until she came up, Jin Qiu got up and pulled the seat open for her, and then called her "Aunt Yang", and I didn't say anything from beginning to end.

After they chatted briefly, Jin Qiu said to me: "Jiangqiao, you sit with Auntie for a while, I'll go to the seafood market to buy some seafood and seasonings, and you cook for us tonight." ”

"Go ahead, buy a few more king crabs, and I'll make you spicy crabs...... By the way, buy some more wine, the wine cabinet in my room is bigger than the wardrobe, but there is not a bottle of wine in it. ”

Jin Qiu smiled, and then left the small seafood restaurant that we used to drink tea and chat.

Yang Jin looked at her departing back and was silent for a long time, and then looked at the sea in front of her that could make people relax. After a while, he smiled and said to me: "Jiangqiao, do you remember when you were young, your father and I brought you to Lianyungang?" ”

I shook my head, indicating that there was no such image in my head.

Yang Jin first took out his wallet from his briefcase, then took out a yellowed photo from his wallet and handed it to me, saying, "It's normal that you can't remember, when I brought you here that year, you were only 4 years old...... Your father borrowed a Santana from the unit and took us all the way from Nanjing to Lianyungang, which was a great thing at the time......" She smiled when she said this, and then said: "In those days, there was not even a highway from Nanjing to Lianyungang, and we were even mentioned to the cross-sea bridge, we followed the ferry to this island, and the island was very deserted!" ”

I took the picture from her hand, and just by looking at it, I was deeply touched by the texture of that era. In the photo, Yang Jin and Jiang Jiyou hugged me together, and I really saw happiness in their smiling faces, and such happiness made me feel that their divorce after four years seemed even more unreal than a dream. So much so that I stared at this photo for a long time and refused to let go......

After a long time, Yang Jin whispered to me again: "I didn't let Yang Qu know about this time I came to Lianyungang, because there are some things I think it's time to talk to you honestly, and I hope to untie the knot between our mother and son." ”

...