In the face of my doubts, Yang Qu didn't say a reason for a while, and in her silence, I said again: "Whether my mother's restraint is due to confidence or her attitude of not being able to control me, but I have to tell you that I met Xiao Ai today, on the street next to the wishing fountain." ”

Although I couldn't see Yang Qu's expression, I could feel her surprise. It took her a moment before she said to me, "Really? I also said to Jia Luo on the plane today, you must have no fun looking for Xiao Ai, because you are no different from waiting for a rabbit, but you are really waiting for you, are you a fool and a fool? ”

"This has nothing to do with good fortune, she came to me after listening to the words I asked her agent to bring her, and we didn't meet by chance......" Speaking of this, my voice lowered a little, and then said to Yang Qu: "What's more, she didn't come to be with me, she was the same as before, and she still persuaded me not to change her current life for her." ”

"Then what do you think, you must be desperate, right?"

"It's not time to despair yet, her ID card and passport are all with me, and she can't go anywhere for the time being."

Yang Qu uncovered my sore spot and asked, "Then when will you feel hopeless?" ”

"When I give her back my identity and passport, she still doesn't want to be with me."

As soon as this sentence was spoken, my heart was tingling, and then there was a sense of urgency that could not breathe, I did so much, definitely not for such a result, I had already thought far about her future before I went abroad, so I couldn't bear this beautiful expectation to be broken by her own hands again and again, and I was still the same me, I didn't think I would fall in love with anyone else besides her.

After briefly cleaning up my mood, I said to Yang Qu again: "By the way, Xiao Ai found me, you must not tell your mother." If she asks, tell her that I'm still looking for it in Rome. ”

Yang Qu was puzzled and asked, "Anyway, you are determined to be with Xiao Ai, so why do you have to hide it from her, wouldn't it be better to let her know?" ”

"Don't ask why...... Also, you also take it to heart when She Shaobo finds someone to investigate me, and help me figure out who said those things to him as soon as possible. ”

"Don't worry, I'm not here to help you with this."

"Well, let's not talk about it yet, you hurry up and get jet lag, I'm ready to go to bed too, I'm too tired today."

This round-trip international call made Yang Qu tired enough, she yawned, said "good night", and hung up our voice call. At the same time, I was lying heavily on the bed, with no strength in my body, and then I felt a little strained to breathe.

After a few moments, I rolled over and took Xiao Ai's ID card and passport out of my pocket, and stared at them for a long time. Although these documents are not colorful, they make me feel that she is right next to me......

I lit a cigarette, and after smoking for so long, I didn't put down her ID, and gradually felt that her appearance on the ID photo was sometimes cordial, sometimes strange.

After extinguishing the cigarette in the ashtray, I put her two important documents under my pillow, and then stood by the window and looked out at the street where only the street lights were on, but there were no passers-by.

I'm a little lonely, and my loneliness stems from not knowing who to say goodnight to in the city where I met Xiao Ai.

I'm also tired because I don't know if my future will be more happy than painful. I longed to hear a death rock song at this moment that brought me closer to hell in order to endure more pain, and chicken soup for the soul was useless.

……

This long night, I didn't sleep well, I woke up several times in the middle, the first thing was to open the pillow to find Xiao Ai's documents, after making sure that it was by my side, I was dazed again, and then fell asleep again in a daze. And so the morning came in this cycle......

When I got up, I found the owner of the hotel, who claimed to be a China expert, and I borrowed the kitchen from him, and then asked him to go to a nearby supermarket and buy some ingredients for cooking.

It's been a long time since I've cooked a good breakfast, but after meeting her, I have such a mood, I not only cooked porridge, but also made a few side dishes that can be eaten, and then put them in a thermos box and went to the hotel where Xiao Ai lived opposite.

She also got up, and when I entered the room, I put the insulated box on the table and said to her, "I made you breakfast, I don't know if you still have the habit of eating breakfast." ”

Xiao Ai glanced at the thermos box and replied, "I was just going to eat at the hotel's restaurant." I think that eating breakfast is a very important thing, and whether people are in a good state this day depends on whether they have a good breakfast. ”

"Huh...... Your current state of mind is really healthy, I remember when I first met you, as long as you didn't have classes in the morning, but you went to bed until twelve o'clock, and you definitely didn't have the habit of eating breakfast at that time......" After a pause, I said with emotion: "In a blink of an eye, you have graduated for so many years, and I am also a middle-aged uncle who is almost 30 years old, but except for the habit of eating breakfast, we don't live like normal people." ”

Xiao Ai sat down in a chair and asked me, "How do you live like a normal person?" ”

I blurted out: "Live your life, you have your own things to do every day, monotony is not terrible at all, as long as you are fulfilling...... Look at how we've been here for the past two years? …… Yes, we can put the responsibility of living in the doldrums and pain to the chaotic youth, but there will always be an end to the day when youth ends, and what we have gained and lost behind the youth, have you thought about it? ”

"Why am I bothering this? I don't even have a childhood, so why should I care about youth! ”

Xiao Ai's words choked me back, I smiled helplessly, and after holding back for a long time, I said to her again: "There are some things you may not want to hear, but I still want to say: Do you know what it's like for that kind of person you love to come and go in your own life?" …… I'll tell you: every time it's heartbreaking, life and death. In the past two years, I have been really miserable, and I guess you are not much better, so we just fell and got up, and finally struggled to the end...... I especially don't want the day when we really say goodbye forever and never see each other again for the rest of our lives, but when everything calms down, we start to regret it again, and when we finally have the opportunity to meet, why did we leave in such a hurry and didn't look back at the rainbow after the storm......"

Xiao Ai looked at me, and I looked at her more and more sincerely, I hope she can understand how I feel now, I really don't want any regrets between us.

But this time, she still didn't treat what I just said with an understanding eye, she asked me to sit down to eat together, and then chose silence, and this silence lasted for an unprecedented meal, Xiao Ai really didn't want to speak, and I wanted to say, but I felt that what I should have said had been said, and the rest might really be a parting heart, cherish this last time together!

……

After breakfast, Xiao Ai and I wandered around the streets of Rome. After walking for a while, we stopped at a bridge with turquoise water and a boat that took tourists to enjoy the scenery. If you put aside the troubles of life and calm down and feel it, this place can really be regarded as a paradise on earth.

I didn't want to torture myself anymore, so I lit a cigarette and buried all my worries deeply, and then integrated myself into this laid-back environment.

Suddenly, Xiao Ai patted me on the shoulder and said, "Do you remember those days when we were in Lijiang?" ”

I turned to look at her and replied, "Of course I won't forget, why did you suddenly ask about this?" ”

"Go get your guitar out, we'll sing together like we used to, and make money for lunch and dinner at night."

My heart moved, and I asked her again, "Do you have no money to spend, or do you want to miss that time?" ”

Xiao Ai replied slightly perfunctorily: "Yes." ”

……

After reaching an agreement with Xiao Ai, I went back to the hotel and got the guitar that I regarded as a treasure, and Xiao Ai didn't move, she stood by the seventh pillar on the bridge and waited for me, the wind blew her body a little thin, which aroused my heart to protect her **, but I had to face the distance she gave me, so I stopped under the bridge and stared at her for a long time.

If only we could hug and kiss as unscrupulously as before!

Finally, I came to her side, handed her the guitar, and said, "Sing, you can sing anything, I'll be your listener again, I haven't heard you sing alone in a long time." ”

Xiao Ai didn't take it from me, she sat on the ground casually, and then said to me with a smile: "I listen to you sing this time, I know you have been waiting for this day for a long time, but I can help you harmonize and whistle." She said, looking at the guitar I was holding in my hand.

When she said whistling, I knew she was talking about the song "Mom", which we used to sing in Lijiang, and it was at that time that I realized that we are two people who can live together, because we have a lot of similarities.

It's just that, when we got to Rome, there was a role reversal between us, and the person who played the guitar and sang became me, and she did only the simplest harmony and whistle, I don't know what this switch would bring us, but when I plucked the first strings of the guitar, I was already looking forward to it.

It's still the same simple melody that used to be, but it's enough to show my achievements in learning guitar, I play and sing at the same time, and time seems to go back in time in my words, and we go back to those days in Lijiang. It made me forget the pain in my heart that I couldn't ask for, as if everything was new.

When the song was over, I put my guitar down against the guardrail and sat down with Xiao Ai. I lit a cigarette and tried to brew my emotions and say something to her.

She opened her mouth and asked me first: "Jiang Qiao, you and your mother have known each other for a long time, do you think her appearance has an impact on your current life?" ”

I looked at her, and then I recalled what happened after Yang Jin appeared in my life, and after a long time, I replied to her: "Yes, it must have an impact, and the most intuitive thing is: I find that I am much easier to do things now than before." In the past, I closed a coffee shop, and the piano shop was not going well, but in the past two years, whether it is in Shanghai or Nanjing, the business has been prosperous. ”

"What else?"

I added, "Nothing else has changed much...... In the past two years, I have met her many times, and she has not given me much of a motherhood...... However, I understand her, she has her current life and family to juggle, and I have long reached the age where I can stand on my own, so there is nothing wrong with living alone like this. After a pause, I smiled again: "It's nice to have one more sister...... I have a good relationship with Yang Qu, and this time I have the courage to choose life again, also because she created opportunities for me...... Otherwise, I would have gone to Shenzhen to meet my relatives over there, and I would never have had the opportunity to see the letter written by Yuan Zhen to Yao Yu...... I think there is still providence in the dark. ”

Xiao Ai didn't admit the providence in my mouth, she hugged her legs with her arms, and then looked up at the sky, obviously having a lot on her mind.

So, I found another topic that was also related to my mother and asked her, "What about you?" Do you still see Teacher Ruan Su often? …… Is she still living in Taipei? ”

This is a question that I seem to say lightly, but it is also a very critical issue, because I know Ruan Su's status in Xiao Ai's heart, so it is also possible that Ruan Su is extremely unwilling to accept me, which made her hesitate and persuade now, and in Ruan Su's opposition, she no longer has the courage to make compromises and sacrifices for me.