It's already nine o'clock in the evening, but the old town of Lijiang is not silent at night, all the bars are using lights and music to drive away the loneliness in the hearts of travelers. At this moment, there are no ignorant and intelligent people, no good people and no bad people, only people who will not enjoy it, I have seen countless people exchange money for all kinds of wine, and use wine to find something called drunken life and dream death.

This is Lijiang, singing and dancing, drunk and dreaming of death

Here, crazy people will be crazier, lonely people will be more lonely, and I am the latter, I can't throw myself in the torrent of crowds, through the night to peek at the lights here, I just want to meet more people like the shopkeeper, I like the crafts he makes, I like his attitude to life, and I like what he says to me.

I hate the women with makeup looking around, the flickering light that illuminates the countless men with evil intentions, they are all the way to those women, they don't want love, they just want a night of passion.

I don't know if Chen Yi and I are simple or complicated compared to these people. For more than 20 years, all we want with each other is a fantasy of love that can grow old, I have never coveted her body, even if we have been facing each other at night, even if I have countless opportunities to possess her, but I still give her the purest gaze, she is the sacred tulip in my heart, unless we have a marriage contract, her sacredness will not peel off in my spiritual world.

I lit the cigarette again that I can't remember how many cigarettes it was tonight, I can't imagine the picture of Chen Yi sharing the bed with others, my heart hurts, my lungs hurt, my liver hurts, it hurts everywhere because she used to be the holiest flower in my heart.

Back at the inn, I knocked on Chen Yi's door again, but there was no response, she may have gone to eat, and she had barely eaten all day today.

I made a good pot of tea with the tea she gave me, I sat down at the lounge table on the balcony, and I started the somewhat sleepy night, I went back to my room to find a ballpoint pen, and then took out the Dongba paper I had just bought from my pocket.

I began to recall what Chen Yi looked like when he was a child, so my pen immediately had a girl walking under the plane tree with a schoolbag and a ponytail; I remembered the first time she learned to ride a bicycle, and I tried to hold her steady, so we went back and forth on the tulip road; And for the first time she showed her hosting talent, I presented her with the most beautiful flowers on behalf of the teachers and students of the first and second classes of junior high school, and she smiled very shyly.

I started writing faster and faster, and a lot of my memories came out in this way, and when I stopped, I was a little out of breath. It turns out that I have never forgotten the things that are so far away, and those that have not been drawn by me, my memory is even more profound I will never forget the way she walked in the old alley after the show on a winter night, and I like to sit on the steps and smoke while waiting for her footsteps, especially when it snows, that mood is even more unforgettable, as if the meaning of my life is just to wait for her.

I picked up the pen again and drew the picture as well, I lit another cigarette, then closed my eyes and looked up and smoked, in the process, I painfully wrote the words "I love you" on the paper.

Yes, the only woman I have loved in this life is Chen Yi, I don't believe that Qiao Ye said that I had ghost thoughts about Xiao Ai, I only pity her so much because I have the same fate as her, this connection far exceeds the friendship of friends, but I can still be sure that it is not love. To this day, I only fantasize about Chen Yi standing next to me in a wedding dress, and I put on a wedding ring for her with my own hands, which is the happiest thing in the world.

As a result, this most beautiful imagination has become the last picture I drew on Dongba paper, and the three words "I love you" are on the top of this painting, which is very eye-catching.

My gaze never took off again, and I watched as the most secret thoughts and the most intimate thoughts of my heart became visible pictures, but the regret in my heart did not diminish because of this.

I tore off all these papers that recorded the past, and then folded them into paper airplanes, and threw them out in the direction of the wind, watching them drift farther and farther, and my heart gradually accepted my fate, because some people gave up with their own hands, not because they didn't love it, but they loved it too much

Downstairs, a figure in a white down jacket bent down, she picked up a paper airplane from the ground that did not drift away, and the moment she turned around, I confirmed that it was Chen Yi I was a little panicked, I didn't expect her to be interested in a paper airplane on the ground. In my imagination, the fate of these paper airplanes should be in the hands of the cleaners, maybe they will all be cleaned up tomorrow, but now it has attracted Chen Yi's attention.

I walked downstairs quickly, and then stood in front of Chen Yi, but it was a step too late, she had already disassembled the paper planes, and I stood in front of her at a loss

She finally spoke: "You folded"

"Yes, I folded it."

Chen Yi looked down at the Dongba paper she was holding in her hand, and she asked again: "The person on it was also drawn by you."

"Painted on a whim."

Chen Yi nodded, she stuffed the Dongba paper into the pocket of her down jacket, I thought this matter was over, but I didn't want Chen Yi to walk in the direction of the wind blowing again, and after a while she picked up several paper airplanes, I counted silently in my heart, except for one that fell on the tree and one that fell on the roof of another inn, she picked up all the others.

Chen Yi didn't rush to disassemble the paper airplanes, she stuffed them all into her pocket, and then handed me the fast food box in her hand, indicating that this was a supper bought for me.

I took it from her hand with some stiffness, and the next moment she went to the inn, and without even saying a word, she went into her room, and I was completely confused, I was absolutely convinced that she was the only person in the world who could read what I had drawn, and what would she feel when she saw it

The night was dark again, Qiao Ye finally returned to the inn, he was surprisingly not drinking today, he was very sober sitting on the balcony smoking, and when a cigarette was about to run out, he finally asked me in the air: "Jiangqiao, today is the first day"

"Day four."

"You say, will Su Han come back tomorrow?"

I thought for a moment and replied, "If she sees the email, I think she should come back, of course, it is not ruled out that she has not read the email recently, so I think you should be in a better state of mind, don't do something stupid to hurt others and yourself at every turn." ”

Qiao Ye didn't answer my words, he suddenly pulled out a baseball bat from under the chair, and then said to me again: "Tomorrow at eight o'clock in the evening, if I can't see her, I'll go and smash her bar, and do what I say." ”

"Crazy you, you are destroying personal property, you have to pay legal responsibility"

Qiao Ye replied unmoved: "Then you sue me, if she deliberately avoids me, what else can I do to let her see me As long as she can come back, I don't care if I go to the police station again, people are driven crazy"

At this moment, I don't know whether to call Qiao Ye naïve, or praise him for his determination to break the boat, I was so conflicted by him that I replied after a while: "Assuming that she is really deliberately avoiding you, why do you have to deliberately see this face, you do this, hurting not only Qin Miao but also Su Han." ”

"Jiang Qiao, I really admire you, and at this time, you still have a thief to persuade me. You stand in my position and tell me, what is the purpose of my coming to Lijiang, and how have I lived all these years?"

"Qiao Ye, it's not that I don't understand what you have to say, I really don't know how to say it to you, maybe the Su Han you think is not the same as the Su Han in reality, I think it's quite sad that a person just loves another person with his own fantasies."

"It's sad that none of us can be sad, it's you, Chen Yi or Qin Miao, and that girl from Nanyi."

I thought of the rights and wrongs entangled in us again, I was a little speechless, and then I also lit a cigarette I don't want to persuade Qiao Ye anymore, because I can't even settle my own affairs, and what qualifications do I have to act as his guide.

I have a hunch that Su Han will definitely come back, but I just hope that she can come back sooner, because Qiao Ye, a hard guy, will really do stupid things like smashing bars in impulse, and this is no better than Nanjing, and it will be very troublesome to deal with the aftermath of such a thing.

When I got back to my room, I washed up and lay down on the bed. I didn't have the mood to do anything, so habitually staring at the ceiling in a daze, coming back to my senses from time to time, all I thought about was Chen Yi, I don't know what her mood would be after reading the Dongba paper I painted on it, I was afraid that my heart would be troubled after it was revealed

I couldn't sleep, so I finally stood at the window with my phone in my hand, and then opened the curtains

I could see that the moonlight was so good tonight that I could even see the door sign hanging on the bar opposite. I thought that such a brightness would make the ignorant and confused people understand a lot of things, so I tried to find some revelations and answers.

My feet are numb, but I'm still confused in my own world, and I can't turn around.

The phone suddenly vibrated in my hand, and I received a message, either using software like WeChat or from my phone. As far back as I can remember, it's been a long time since anyone has sent me such messages except for ads.

I subconsciously thought of Xiao Ai, because the mobile phone I bought for her was not smart at all, so I couldn't install chat software, so this mobile phone message was 100% sent by her

I picked it up and looked at it, and fell into a sluggish state in an instant, it turned out that this message was sent by Chen Yi, she said: "Jiangqiao, I have refunded tomorrow's plane ticket, I don't want to leave Lijiang for the time being"

In an instant, I woke up from my sluggish state again, a 100% sure thing, there will be deviations, and this is not what surprised me the most, Chen Yi's sudden decision not to leave really stimulated my sensitive nerves

In the midst of this shock, I couldn't help but ask myself: what else in this world is absolute, except for the gender of men and women, and life and death