Uncle Taurus said all this in one breath, looked at Niu Tiangou, and then seemed to be summing up, saying: "In the final analysis, the change of marriage in the world comes from the change of conditions. The smaller the change in the conditions of the husband and wife, the smaller the gap between the two parties, and the stronger the stability of the marriage. An ordinary man whose appearance, material, and spiritual conditions have not changed or have not changed much will mostly stay with an equally ordinary woman until old age, on the contrary, the greater the change in the conditions of a couple, the greater the gap, or the greater the contrast, it will inevitably lead to divorce in the end.

"The law of condition change is the worst marriage combination of the 'dislocation and equivalence' type, followed by the 'gradient equivalence' type and the 'reciprocal equivalence' type of marriage combination."

Uncle Taurus Xing said this, stopped, with a smile on the corner of his mouth, looked at Niu Tiangou again meaningfully, and said slowly: "You don't have to be too uncomfortable when you divorce your wife Teresa Teng, it is also the law of condition change at work." ”

Hearing this, Niu Tiangou was stunned, and then plucked up his courage and said, "Then can you tell me specifically?" ”

"Okay." Uncle Taurus retracted his gaze, seemed to think deeply for a while, and then said slowly, "In the past few years, although your appearance, material conditions and spiritual conditions have not changed much, Teresa Teng's material conditions have changed greatly, and with it, ** has also undergone great changes.

"Let's start with the changes in material conditions. The changes in Teresa Teng's material conditions are mainly manifested in two aspects: living (living) environment and wage income.

Teresa Teng originally lived in the countryside, and her profession was only a substitute teacher, with a small and unstable income. In the eyes of a rural substitute teacher, finding a national teacher with a fixed occupation and a fixed income is undoubtedly a better choice for her. After marrying you, she is just a rural young woman, living in a rural bungalow and farming and raising chickens and pigs, so her young beauty and your 'iron rice bowl' public position are 'on equal terms', so your marriage was temporarily stable.

"But now it's different. She lives in the big city of Xianhai, lives in a small western-style building, and rides in a car - although these belong to her sister and brother-in-law, she can also get them after remarriage; What you see and feel is the bustle of a modern city. Is she willing to give up her small western-style house and car and go back to the countryside with you to live in a bungalow and ride a bicycle? Is she willing to abandon the wide, bright road and go back to the countryside with you to walk on the narrow, muddy paths? Is she willing to give up the brilliant street lamps and colorful neon lights and go back to the countryside with you to see the fireflies in the deserted fields and the lonely stars in the sky? Is she willing to give up her current comfortable life and go back to the countryside with you, in the wind, rain, mud, cows, horses, pigs, arches, and chickens?

"Besides, her current salary is several times that of yours, and her income in one year is equivalent to the income of returning to the countryside to farm, raise chickens and pigs for ten years, is she willing to give it up?

"Let's talk about her ** changes. Human ** is a magic circle that expands with the change of time and environment. It turned out that she was in the countryside, and she just wanted to get rich through hard work and thrift to live a 'well-off life', and now she has seen the world and broadened her horizons after a few years of living in a big city...... This is also the case with the marriage of the white, tender and handsome daughter-in-law of the cattle barbarian in your village.

"The premise of marriage stability is the reciprocity of conditions, once the conditions change, it is no longer reciprocal, people's ** will change, people's ** will change, it will affect people's preferences, stimulate people to re-equalize choices, marriage will naturally be re-'shuffled'. Her conditions have changed so much that they are grossly out of step with your current conditions - you can't satisfy her desires. So, your divorce is inevitable.

"Remember, in a human marriage, the conditions remain the same, the marriage is stable, the conditions change, the marriage goes apart, and the most likely to change are the material conditions (wealth) and the spiritual conditions (**). If you resolutely did not let Teresa Teng go out to work and maintain the original conditions, her material conditions would not change, ** would not change, and there would be no chance to re-'shuffle', maybe then, your marriage will last forever and you will always be 'growing old together'......"

After listening to Uncle Taurus's words, Niu Tiangou suddenly remembered his cousin Narcissus.

The tax commissioner of that dog day had "foresight" and instructed his uncle to only let his cousin go to elementary school for a few years, and not let her go to junior high school or high school. If my cousin really went to junior high school, high school or even college, her mental conditions (culture and education) changed, her vision was higher, and she would definitely not look down on the black and ugly son of the tax commissioner who had not even graduated from junior high school, and she would definitely not recognize that marriage.

Take 10,000 steps back, even if you are tied up by your uncle to get married, your cousin will eventually choose to divorce.

Ginger, it's still old and spicy.

However, is a stable marriage a change that restricts and stifles each other's conditions for the better? That's mean and incompetent, isn't it?

……

After waking up, although Niu Tiangou's brain was still a little groggy, Uncle Taurus's words seemed to still echo in his ears.

Thinking back to Uncle Taurus's words, Niu Tiangou seemed to understand many truths.

Alas, if you want a stable marriage, the conditions must be equal, and if the conditions change greatly, the marriage will inevitably go wrong.

There is only one fundamental cause of marital fission, and that is the unequal conditions -- the unequal conditions at the time of marriage and the new asymmetry caused by too much change in the conditions of one party after the marriage, and the other so-called "reasons" are all nonsense.

What values are different, personality differences, cultural level differences, it is because your spiritual conditions are not equal.

What aesthetic fatigue, domestic violence, xing life disorders, loneliness and emptiness, third-party involvement, and failure to take family responsibilities, that is, your physical or mental conditions cannot correspond to his conditions with the changes of time and environment, or are misplaced and equal, and he is bored with you. If you look like a fairy, charming, gentle and virtuous, considerate and generous, and constantly improve your conditions to match them, will he still be aesthetically fatigued? Can he still do it? Is there any other dissonance between him and you? Will you still be lonely and empty? He can't love you, can the "third party" still "plug in"? Will he be able to live up to his family's responsibilities?

What two places are separated, less together and more separated, difficult emotional communication, lack of communication, that is, your material conditions cannot be equal to his (or her) **, and your spiritual conditions are not equal. If your material conditions are equal to his (or her)'s, and the two parties move back and forth, how can they separate? How can we gather less and leave more? If your mental conditions are equal, and you communicate all day and night, why is it difficult to communicate? Where is the lack of communication?

For those who are married, the conditions are equal, and for those who change their marriage, the conditions are unequal or the conditions change, and there is no other.