Standing on top of this tall building, I found myself so close to the hanging moon in the sky, but I didn't get a trace of temperature because of this, and then I realized that the moon only uses the light of the sun, and it has no temperature itself, even if you get closer, don't expect it to drive away the cold for yourself, think about the stupidest thing in the world, I'm afraid it is to use the moonlight to keep warm.

So, in a trance, I seemed to have become the moon that radiated light but did not have warmth, and under the moon stood a vague human-like image, but it had been lonely for a hundred years

I turned around, stroked the red and swollen fingerprints on Le Yao's cheek with my hand, smiled and said to her: "Although people are real, I am afraid that those loneliness and pain are fake, because there will be no you and me in a hundred years, and the loneliness and pain experienced cannot prove that we have ever come to this world."

Le Yao didn't have any affection, she didn't even look at me, she just looked at the city below her that was not warm because of the neon light, and said, "Are you talking to me these words to help me brainwash?" Hehe, in fact, it's not necessary, because I didn't plan to call you to the restaurant in the empty city today, but the result was that you arrived uninvited, so the pain you just experienced was originally not there, I just thought that you just passed through, the ebb and flow brought by it, who cares about those bullshit pains, and getting married well is the most important thing I should do in the future, and you had better live happier than me! ”

I nodded, and let go of the hand that was caressing her face, but she suddenly pressed my hand down on the hand that was about to be lowered, and the temperature of her cheeks came from my palm again, confirming that we were here for real

As expected, after leaving the building, I went to the left, she to the right, and after a few moments, we were getting farther and farther away, and the only thing that remained constant was the still flickering neon, rendering the city so enchanting, so enchanting that I wanted to flee from it.

I literally fled, to an old neighborhood with only dim street lights and no neon lights, the westernmost part of the city, the one we call "West of the Old Town," to be exact.

I lay on a telephone pole, looking at the dilapidated piece in front of me, and there was a sour feeling in my nose that could not be controlled, at this time I already fully believed that Le Yao was pregnant with my child, but when I was suffering from the pain of abortion, I gave her doubts, and even less than a month after the miscarriage, I jumped into the icy pool water for filming, and I couldn't accompany her to give her some care, thinking about it, I am sorry for her, and I am sorry for the love in the absurd years we spent together.

If my life at this time can be divided into three stages, then the years spent with Jian Wei represent youth and frivolity, and this period with Mi Cai is reborn from the fire, but what I spent with Le Yao is absurd and bizarre Maybe, what I don't love is not Le Yao, but that time, we don't seem to meet each other at the right time!

A handful of tears rolled from my eyes, I raised my head and swallowed the tears back into my stomach, then lowered my head and blew off a handful of snot, and walked towards the old neighborhood to find a shop where I could buy cigarettes

The old town is never as prosperous and convenient as the new town, and I walked a few streets without finding a newsstand or convenience store that was still open, and I had the idea of giving up for the time being, I wanted to go back to the new town where I should have stayed, or to the old house that Mi Cai and I had been remembering, there would definitely be cigarettes for sale.

I walked from the street to the end of the street, looking for taxis to pass by, but I was surprised to find a flower shop that was still open, and the blackboard in front of the flower shop prominently said that there were cigarettes for sale.

I walked into the flower shop, and then I saw a busy figure, and I said, "Boss, do you have any Marlboro cigarettes, bring me a pack." ”

She turned around, a girl in her early twenties with a ponytail, very delicate and quiet, and she shook her head at me, indicating that there were no Marlboro cigarettes.

I asked again, "Is there a red plum or Zhongnanhai?" ”

She still shook her head apologetically, I kind of wanted to leave, because I didn't like to smoke other brands of cigarettes, but I was tormented by the addiction to smoke, so I asked for the third time, "Then what cigarettes do you sell here?" ”

She took out a few boxes of commercially available cigarettes from her waist bag and handed them to me, but she never said a word.

I chose a bag of Hongtashan, took out a piece of money from my wallet in a trance, handed it to her, took the cigarette from her hand, turned around and left.

At the corner of the street, I was smoking a cigarette while waiting for a passing taxi, when suddenly my clothes were gently pulled behind me, and I turned around in surprise, only to find that it was the girl who had just sold me cigarettes, holding a stack of change in her hand, and making sign language to me.

Only then did I know that she couldn't speak, and I couldn't quite understand the sign language she did, but I probably knew that I was in a trance just now, and I forgot about the change she was asking for

I knew that it was not easy for the disabled to do some small business, so I shook my hand and signaled that she didn't need to look for me, but she insisted on giving it back to me, but my pockets were very tight, and she tried to stuff it in several times, but it ended in failure.

She finally took her phone out of her pocket and typed a line on it to show me: "Thank you for your kindness, but I don't need sympathy, just earn the money you deserve!" There was also a smiling emoji behind the text.

This is a very independent girl, I thought that the act of kindness may have pierced her self-esteem, so I said with apologies: "I'm sorry, I was too self-righteous, I will take back the money." I said as I took the stack of change from her hand.

She made a smiling expression on her phone, and I, who was hopeless in waiting for the car, felt a burst of hunger, so I asked her as she was about to leave: "Girl, is there a place to eat nearby, do you want to go and have some supper?" ”

She made a few gestures to me, but I couldn't understand what she was referring to, she quickly pressed it on her phone, and then handed it to me: "If you're not in a hurry, I'll take you back after closing the store." ”

"What's in the store?"

"Xiaolong buns and rice porridge, do you like them?"

I nodded, she put her phone in her pocket, motioned for me to wait, and then turned and walked towards the alley behind me, and with a cigarette, I also took a cigarette from the cigarette case again, smoking and waiting

Waiting, my mobile phone rang again, it was a boy calling, since he went abroad, he always likes to call me when he gets up, showing off some of what he has seen and heard abroad, sometimes he really hasn't seen or heard, he will talk to me about the dream he had last night, in short, although he is gone, but he has been using this daily telephone communication in my life, which makes me feel that in fact, he is quite lonely abroad!

My mood was a little low, and it took a while before I got on the phone, and he asked me, "Brother Yang, guess what dream I had last night?" ”

"I'm more concerned about what you learned in school during the day yesterday."

"Hehe, I've learned something about game programming to tell you, you don't understand it!"

"Then don't talk to me about that unreliable dream!"

"Okay, let's talk about you, have you been with Sister Le Yao recently?"

My heart suddenly tightened, remembering the scene that had just happened with Le Yao on the top of the tall building, and I was speechless for a long time, at this time, for me, any topic about Le Yao was a kind of destruction.

The boy didn't notice my abnormality, and asked, "Brother Yang, can't you reveal a little bit of news about Sister Le Yao to me, our fan support group has been waiting for the news of her comeback!" ”

I took a heavy puff on my cigarette and finally said to him, "She's not going to come back because she's getting married!" ”

"Ahh Who is she going to marry, with you? ”

"And me? Do you think it's possible? ”

"Why can't it be, she has always loved you so much I remember a chat she told me that you don't want to marry! But aren't you already back together with Sister Mi Cai? Could it be that during my absence, something earth-shattering happened, Sister Le Yao, she successfully counterattacked you! Haha, it must be like this, life is like a play, and drama is like life! ”

I was silent for a long time before replying: "Study over there, don't fantasize that the person she wants to marry is not me, and it is not her who I want to marry." ”

The boy exclaimed, "Oh, mygod, what a cruel joke! ”

I just took a puff of my cigarette and was about to end this meaningless conversation, when the boy asked me, full of pain and regret, "Then who is she going to marry?" Isn't it the second generation of coal? ”

"No, I don't know who it is, I'll go to dinner right away, let's not talk about it yet, and I'll call you when I have time."

"Wait, wait, how can it be like this, the last person Sister Le Yao married is not you, how painful and desperate she is, I still remember she told me that her biggest hope in this life is to be able to smile from the bottom of her heart on the day of marriage, how can she laugh!!"

I hung up the phone in a very depressed feeling, and looked back at the somewhat dilapidated old city behind me in the sound of weak and heavy gasps, but the night made this ruin turn into a kind of joy, sorrow and nostalgia flowing from the past.

In a distraction, the girl from the flower shop had already pushed her pink electric car to my side, and I walked side by side with her to the snack bar in an unknown corner, and the night finally became euphemistic in a silent silence! ――

Yesterday I updated a chapter with a cold.,Today I'll update two big chapters of 3,000 words to make up for it.