The street lamps came on again, the light swayed through the windows on our table, I drank another bottle of beer, and then I felt a little dizzy, and in my dizziness I seemed to look back at the past, in those past fragments, what did I do for love?

After breaking up with Janeway, I began to live a decadent and indulgent life, so I let others take advantage of it and took so many photos that Janeway, who originally planned to rush back from the United States, tore up the ticket in despair.

After breaking up with Mi Cai, I always had an offensive posture and never thought about saving anything, but perhaps, in the dead of night, they all thought of me, but I responded with hurt.

How did this cold violence of mine come about, and what lurked in my heart, constantly making me so incomprehensible about women!

Maybe it was the word "breakup" that broke me down, or maybe it was me who looked at the breakup with too much despair, and then rejected the possibility of a qiē, and then killed all the leeway

Fang Yuan continued to teach by example: "Zhaoyang, when men and women are together, it is inevitable that there will be bumps and bumps, Yan Yan and I have also broken up, but we still came down, because we are willing to calm ourselves down, give each other a chance, and give love a chance, you have also seen that in today's society, there are many people who remarry after divorce, why should you close yourself off, and treat breaking up as a very desperate thing as if you are facing a great enemy? Make her feel like you can't live without her at all! ”

My stubborn heart was faintly showing signs of loosening, and I lit a cigarette for myself again, and I felt in my breath that those painful nights were probably just fantasies of my strong subjective consciousness, and I was even more painful at this time!

Leaving the tavern, I carried half a bottle of unfinished beer, came to a flyover embedded in the city, and looked at the cars under me in a blur, so the soul in my body was pierced by these flickering lights, the lively wind, but also with the coolness of autumn, whistling through those piercing, I gradually became a little empty, so empty that I could not remember what I had done and what I was expecting.

I was drunk, drunk on this soon-to-be abandoned flyover, so I took advantage of this drunkenness, took out my mobile phone from my pocket, found Mi Cai's number, hid in the softness of the city, and sent her a message with only a comma, I wanted to tell her that I didn't want to put an end between us.

I waited, but maybe she wouldn't understand, maybe she had already put an end between us, maybe I should have been more proactive, but there was nothing I could do about it this night, I was drunk!

Finally, a kind passer-by walked up to the abandoned flyover, he woke me up and asked me where I lived, I told him the address of the old house, and he helped me off the bridge and put me in a taxi.

After arriving at the destination, the driver helped me to the entrance of the building, I gave him a hundred yuan, pressed his head with some pain, and told him that he didn't have to look for it, the driver said "thank you" to me and left, my world was quiet again, or what was quiet was this community, it seems that many residents have moved out of here during this time, because this place is too old, and there is almost no urban atmosphere.

I climbed up the stairs with my hands and feet, and when I reached the top floor, I gasped and leaned against the door, felt a cigarette and lit it, I knew that this night, Mi Cai would not come at all, but I still wanted to come and see, and then think about the picture of our first acquaintance here, maybe I will figure out why we are the way we are, and what destroyed the one we have run.

My head is getting heavier and heavier, but my consciousness is getting clearer and clearer, I think of the life I have longed for in my whistling youth, including love, and I think of the river of happiness that I imagined in the melody played on the guitar

But this qiē has gradually drifted away from me, so I shed tears of repentance in the remnants of my youth, but I can't keep the psychedelic stimulated by the alcohol of the years that run forward as always, I hold my head and whimper in pain!

The door of the house was opened from the inside, and I fell to the ground without relying on me, and then I saw Mi Cai, who had been verbally attacked by me during the day, and I panicked for some reason, but I didn't even have the strength to sit up

"You've been drinking?"

I answered with a whimpering cry of pain.

"How much did you drink?"

I finally sat up from the ground, wiped away the sticky tears from my face, and said to her with the greatest courage in my life, "Don't marry him, okay?" ”

She didn't have much affection and looked at me and asked, "Why, can you give me a reason?" ”

"Because I don't think you have forgotten me"

"That was before today."

"The reason why I say this to you today is because I don't want you to walk on a wrong road, and the more wrong it is, the more outrageous it becomes!"

After a long period of silence, Mi Cai spoke: "But what I want to hear is not that you tell me this, you go, I have to leave too, all the things in this house will be moved by a housekeeping company tomorrow." ”

"Where are you going?"

Mi Cai didn't give an answer, but said, "Don't ask, you can go." ”

"You tell sù, where can I go, I'm so drunk!"

"Whatever you want, you're used to wandering around the city anyway."

Her words reminded me again of those days when I had nowhere to go, I was alone in the city in the middle of the night, so lonely and helpless, and the loneliness in these memories made me helpless again, and I looked at her a little dumbfounded.

She reached out and motioned to pull me up from the ground, I took her hand, and I felt the softness again, and my heart seemed to melt, and an idea came out of my head and asked her, "Is that guitar still there?" ”

My question surprised her a little and took a long time to answer, "In my car." ”

"Is it okay to lend me something, and when I run out, I'll give you something in return!"

She smiled and asked, "Does this count as a transaction?" ”

"No, I've always owed you, give me a chance, okay?"

"Zhaoyang, I really don't need anything from you to give me anymore"

Before she finished speaking, I took her hand that had not yet let go, turned on the sensor light in the corridor, and walked downstairs in a trance