For the first time, Xuanyuan Mingyue slept without being tied up and without consuming light mana.

She didn't react to that yet.

Although I couldn't sleep at first, I soon fell asleep.

As a delicate eldest lady, where has she done any work.

Therefore, she was also tired after a day, and at this time she could finally have a good rest, and she really slept a very comfortable night.

Until dawn.

There was a sound at the door.

Xuanyuan Mingyue woke up suddenly.

Being in a foreign land, and it was almost a desperate situation, Xuanyuan Mingyue couldn't say that she could hold it.

Moreover, Wang Jian, this guy looks ill-intentioned when he says it.

"Knock knock. ”

Xuanyuan Mingyue was frightened, and after getting dressed, it took a while before slowly opening the door.

"How did you sleep last night, why so late. ”

"What's the matter with you. ”

"Eat. ”

Wang Jian held a plate in his hand and smiled.

There was actually a breakfast that wasn't fried chicken.

"There is still storage here, you can find some food that is not fried chicken, I don't know what you like, I will prepare some stomach-nourishing soy milk for you, well, in other words, everyone is Chinese, you know soy milk." ”

"Of course I do. ”

Xuanyuan Mingyue vaguely felt that Wang Jian's practice of treating people as dirt buns who had never seen the world made her very dissatisfied.

"Eat. ”

Wang Jian walked in like this, as if he had entered his girlfriend's room, of course, Xuanyuan Mingyue ignored this.

Of course, Xuanyuan Mingyue knows soy milk.

Even if she didn't live on Earth, she must have similar training in order to be a good spy.

After all, soy protein is an excellent protein. Beauty Nest

I took a tentative sip, at least a hot soup.

Chinese are passionate about drinking hot water.

Chinese have been drinking hot water for thousands of years, a tradition handed down from their ancestors.

In order to purify the water quality, the ancients invented a purification method called the "stone heating method". It is recorded in the "Zhou Li" that throwing hot stones into the water can kill insects and prevent epidemics. So the ancients obtained hot water by boiling pebbles into the water. There is also a cloud in "Health Essentials": "Whoever boils water and drinks it, there is no chance of being seriously ill." ”

However, due to the level of science and technology in ancient times, the economic level was limited, and the people who could drink hot tea were only a small part of the upper-class people.

Because not every family can afford to buy a kettle for boiling hot water, not every family is willing to use firewood to boil hot water, and only guests, the elderly, and pregnant women can enjoy the treatment of drinking hot water.

In fact, drinking hot water has a history of more than 4,000 years in China, and it is recorded in Mencius: "In winter, you drink soup". "Soup" is hot water or boiling water. In the eyes of the ancients, drinking cold water was harmful to health, but drinking hot water had a good function of health care and alleviating disease.

When animals are eating, their vigilance will be reduced.

Wang Jian suddenly sat opposite and said: "My name is Wang Jian, I am 19 years old this year, I have a girlfriend, I am very loyal, I have no bad habits, I am the best at fire spells, I have no special preferences and taboos in my diet, my birthday is still early in winter, I don't sleepwalk or snore when I sleep at night, and the type of preference is tall and smooth, eh, so you are very safe and ......."

took a sip of soy milk and wiped the corners of her mouth, but Xuanyuan Mingyue drank: "What do you mean by talking for a long time, you are trembling and annoying." ”

"In the future, you and I really want to stay here for a long time, forever, considering our previous confrontation state, I must first reveal some of my secrets in exchange for your trust, after all, Mingyue, in the future, I want to give my life and back to you." ”

The basis of trust between people is that betrayal comes at a high cost.

In game theory, the prisoner's dilemma is unsolvable, because two prisoners (or businessmen and customers) cannot trust each other, and they will eventually betray each other. Larger social dilemmas, such as the arms race, the tragedy of the commons, and the problem of free-riding, are equally difficult to solve. On a logical level, betrayal is the only viable option, and that choice will ultimately have disastrous consequences for the interests of the entire group.

The question is not about people, it's about predicament. 2. The social dilemma is to choose between the interests of the group and some conflicting individual interests. Suppose that individuals always try to minimize their time in captivity, or maximize their catch, short-term profits. But in the real world, people are much more complex than that. Our conflicting interests are more trivial and diverse, subjective and contextual. We also try to maximize other interests beyond our own interests. As a result, our social dilemmas are part of our evolving relationships with others.

Society solves social dilemmas by turning subordination to the interests of the group into the best interests of the individual. We do these things so naturally that we are not aware of the existence of the dilemma. Because of the law and the police, stealing a widescreen TV is no better than not stealing. Because everyone will react, betraying a friend is not a wise choice. Of course, not being imprisoned is more risky than spending six years in prison, and it is better to fish as much as possible than to catch less, but even these assessments do not necessarily stand up to the scrutiny of people's emotions. Is it really better to be a traitor without being imprisoned than to spend six years in prison? Is it really better to catch more fish and destroy the ocean's feeding capacity than to catch less (and even more others than you)? The answers to these questions depend on who you are, what you do, and where you are.

Trust is to believe that the other person will not betray you when the other person is likely to betray you. And the solution of the prisoner's dilemma is precisely an example of mutual trust between human beings. This trust does not come from an ethereal sense of trust, but from the rational thinking that has evolved into human design.

Trust is born gradually in the process of human cooperation. Humans have reached an unprecedented level of trust and cooperation compared to other animals. Animals are short-sighted, and when they discover that there is great benefit to be gained by betraying each other, there is nothing to stop them from betraying each other. Human rationality helps humans to exercise self-control, to focus on the long-term interests of the future, and even to devise systems to prevent betrayers from profiting and encouraging cooperation among collaborators. The specialized division of labor in human beings greatly increases the efficiency of the production of goods and knowledge, which also requires trust as a foundation. Without trust, how can you trust that the bread that someone has sold you can eat, whether someone else has made you clothes to wear, whether someone else has built a house for you to live in?

And trust is not only a weapon for human beings to outperform other species in natural selection, but also a magic weapon for one group to be stronger than another in the internal competition of human beings. In a social community of mutual trust, the cost of mutual suspicion is minimized. The economic community can focus on making the pie bigger, rather than bothering to prevent others from taking more of the pie.

As long as another person is involved, nothing is 100% trustworthy. Therefore, trust is essentially equivalent to "risk-taking". Because objectively speaking, trust is likely to make mistakes. Therefore, trust is not how I can not make mistakes, but it is up to me to judge under what conditions I dare to let it go, that is, "as long as I am ready, I can trust him". It's a completely subjective decision, and one with a perfect possibility of making mistakes. The essence of trust is to take a risk with incomplete information when objective information is insufficient. If the information is complete and spread out on the table, there is no such thing as "trust" or "distrust". There is no such thing as foolproof trust. We never know what the future holds, whether it will be good or bad, but in the face of such uncertainty, we can only make a determination regardless of everything. Otherwise, a relationship can't move forward. Trust is this desperate impulse. The moment two people start a relationship, it's like saying, "I don't know what the future holds for you, but I'm still desperate to give myself to you. That's why the wedding vows say, "Whether she's rich or poor, healthy or sick, are you willing to be with her forever?" These three words are very sacred, and she is saying: I am willing to take risks for your sake, and I grant you the right to harm me.

We're not like baboons. Not only do we work collaboratively with people we know, but we also get along peacefully with strangers we never meet. We treat strangers fairly, sometimes altruistically. We put the interests of the collective above the selfishness of the individual. What's more, we also limit the selfish behavior of others.

We prevent deviant behaviour through a combination of our own prosocial impulses and social pressures, a common approach that applies to primitive group hunting societies, civilized societies, and today's globalized societies.

Trust is the ability to build cooperation. People who are good at working together must have the same expertise in choosing people to be trusted, or in being trusted, or both. We can see that once the show begins to doubt everyone around him, this boss should not last more than two episodes. One of the important differences between humans and animals is that the organization is larger, more complex, and more elaborate. Success can even be quantified by how many people are trusted, and how many people are trusted.

Because of the difference in nature, we come into this world, everyone has their own likes and dislikes, which is understandable, but have you noticed that it seems that as we grow older, we seem to find that our lives are full of disgusting things more and more easily, and it is more and more difficult to find things that we like, we gradually feel that life is too boring, too bitter, not free like a besieged city, it seems that just to make yourself happy, you have to work hard with your old nose, and it is thankless, as if to make you happy, relax, but everything is so difficult, so difficult。 We are becoming more aware of what we don't want, but it's also becoming harder and harder to get what we want. When I found out, it was really frustrating. When I think of my childhood, when I was free, unrestrained, and heartless, I simply feel how a person can live like this. Does the world of adults, the world of adults, really mean such constraints, boring, helplessness and cold rules? The world of adults is indeed different from the world of children, because the characteristic of adults is to learn to be self-responsible, and recognizing this is a sign of a person's maturity, but what I want to say is that it is not enough to be aware of this, and realizing this may just allow you to adapt to social life, so as not to have problems in social life, and even make some small achievements and small achievements, but sticking to this point can not break through this, but it is easy to make you unhappy. After meeting so many people, I have come to realize more and more that after all these phenomena, it is the result of us internalizing too many standards from the outside world, and gradually sacrificing our own nature in order to obtain these seemingly superior standards from the outside world. In a word, we use the principle of exclusion too much in our lives rather than the principle of inclusion. The consequence is that each of us is trapped in a cage of exclusion, loneliness, suspicion and apathy. We blame each other, distrust each other, compare each other, and look down on each other. Each of us strives for excellence and excellence, but the whole life is plunged into competition and conquest, so we are nervous, we do not relax.

It is difficult for this kind of person to conclude an affinity and intimate relationship with others, because perhaps his entire self-confidence is based on his own superiority, or maybe he can only be more amiable with those who are inferior to him, because such people have few threats to him and will not affect his sense of security, so his defensive nerves do not need to be so tight. But this affinity is basically a limited affinity, it is more like a handout. Subconsciously people who feel that they are not good enough will overuse this rule, that is, they feel that they are inferior to others, and then they will overcompensate on the conscious level: I want to be better than all of you. If a person learns in his early years that people are divided into high and low and that people are not equal, then he will definitely pursue the high and noble excessively, and avoid letting himself fall into the low and low. If a person has been in a very weak position in his early years, and he has tasted too much of the humiliation and helplessness that comes from being weak, he will certainly avoid putting himself in that position when he grows up. He needs to be on top. People who always think that they are superior to others cannot have a real affinity with others, because affinity means that everyone is equal, which means that you need to release yourself from your superiority and dare to admit that you are ordinary and ordinary. Treating oneself as a "god" is essentially a rejection of the world, and the root of this rejection is that he may have experienced rejection or trauma in his early years. So, I loved the world even later, but after all, I didn't trust it so much, because it hurt me and didn't even accept me. In fact, there are many people who base their relationship with the world on fear. Perhaps, we are all people who have been hurt by the world in the past, and finally one day, we have the power, the ability to protect ourselves, and at the same time the power to hurt others. Perhaps, we don't hurt anyone, but we don't trust each other, and we are separated from the world, that is, from people. When we come into contact with people, we will habitually see the annoying things about others, and we will often express our dislike for these qualities, and we will be very stingy in expressing what we like. Just like our hearts, when they are full of criticism, they are less and less receptive. Therefore, when we think we are very kind to point out the "shortcomings" of others, we often arouse the disgust of others and do not achieve the results we want. This is also a problem that many people have in management or interpersonal relationships, always paying attention to the shortcomings of others, liking to point out the shortcomings of others, and hoping that others will change. In fact, the secret of the relationship is that you need someone to show this quality, you need to first trust him to show this quality, and then encourage him to show this quality, and when he shows this quality, praise him in time and strengthen him. It seems to be a simple thing, but it is the difference between two values: the former is to choose fear, and the latter is to choose trust.

Each of us is also equal, because everyone has their own unique value, and it is only at this point that I see true equality in the world. And any other superiority is nothing but illusory. Because the greatest equality in life lies in the fact that everyone has the same joys, sorrows, and feelings. This does not change because you are poor or rich, whether you are a man or a woman, whether you are a beggar or an emperor. When you can't admit the value of others, you can't accept yourself, and you will stick to the rules of exclusion, but although you succeed in rejecting the outside world, you also succeed in rejecting yourself, and you are one step further on the road of not accepting yourself. So choose to trust others, that is, choose to trust yourself, believe that my true self is good enough, I don't need to desperately hold a lot of illusory things to decorate myself, I stand on the earth steadily. I'm not afraid of being defeated, I'm not afraid of being foreign, I'm not afraid of others looking down on me, and when I feel that I'm not doing well, I can improve myself, instead of trying to defend myself. When we see the self as an immutable, rigid thing, and not as a life, a life that can grow, our development is limited.

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