Miao Wu then carefully told the Queen Mother what had happened before and after, and the Queen Mother just frowned lightly and listened, and finally looked at me and asked softly: "Yun'er, the waist card that time was left behind by accident, right?" ”

I nodded lightly and told the Queen Mother the story of the loss of the waist card. After hearing this, the Queen Mother said quietly for a long time: "Do evil." As she spoke, a big tear fell, and the Queen Mother looked at me with tears on her face, and cried quietly: "How many lifetimes do I have to atone for my sins before I can redeem these sins." ”

I shook my head, although I still couldn't stop the tears, but I said firmly: "Mother...... Don't blame you......"

The Queen Mother couldn't help crying and said, "What kind of sin did you do in your life, such a disloyal, unfilial, unkind and unrighteous person?" Slowly, the old man cried hoarsely, "In which world did I create the sin!" My son! ”

I know that the Queen Mother remembered Ah Qing again, the ambition of the Liang family buried her and killed Ah Qing, and in the end the Liang family chose to abandon her. The family affection is weak, the flesh and blood are fratricidal, the queen mother has been bumpy for half her life, and she is heartbroken after losing her son. And Liang Xiang, why did he get worse after losing his son? The human heart is indeed the most unpredictable.

The night is like splashing ink, and the thick can't be dispersed. Last time, Liang Yuer broke into the door, but I lost my beloved son. This time, the Queen Mother climbed over the wall, but I was very moved. If people judge whether a person is good or bad just by entering through the door or through the wall, then the person who enters through the door may not be a good person, but may also be a powerful person; Those who come in over the wall may not all be ghosts, and they may also be weak old people.

The Queen Mother insisted on leaving, and since she already knew that I was so wronged, she really didn't want to cause me any more trouble. It's just that this time I asked Miao Wu to open the door and send the Queen Mother out in a dignified manner. Good people want to leave with dignity, and although they go through the door, they still leave at night.

The door of the cold palace has been locked from the outside since Ah Han came. It's just that Miao Wu is right, it's not that it's not locked, but it's not worth locking.

After the Queen Mother left, I couldn't sleep for a long time. I sat in bed and laughed at myself, thinking that I used to make Liang Yuer deeply jealous, but there was nothing to make her afraid at this time. I lost Ah Han's upright protection at the moment, lost my child, and lost the title of imperial concubine.

Beichen in the night sky is really not suitable for me. I am destined not to become Concubine Chenniang in Ah Han's mind, but I don't know if I will become an irreplaceable existence in his heart in the future.

The days of the cold palace are really cold palaces now, quiet as stagnant water, and even Liang Yuer refuses to provoke anymore.

Li Rongrong also secretly came to see me every now and then, sometimes staying with me for a long time, and with her, I and my mind were much calmer.

Summer is coming, and the weather is getting hotter. Li Rongrong took a needle and thread and embroidered a purse with me.

Sitting under the porch, the cold palace is also shady, and it is cool in the hot summer without ice. Li Rongrong embroidered carefully with stitches and threads, and I smiled lightly: "You don't need it now, who is this embroidered for?" ”

Li Rongrong still looked at the satin intently, and said with a faint smile: "Embroidered to see, the people I really want to give are gone, where do I want to give it to others?" ”

I put down the needle and said softly, "So, I don't know what I'm going to embroider this purse for." ”

Li Rongrong smiled and said, "It's okay, even if you embroider it, if it's done, I'll give it to the emperor on your behalf, and keep it so that others don't know." ”

I sighed, shook my head, and said, "It's still not necessary, this thing, if it wasn't embroidered with such a pure heart, it wouldn't be beautiful." ”

Li Rongrong was just stunned, and she embroidered her purse quietly when she was young. After staying quietly for an afternoon, Li Rongrong left after sunset. In the hot summer, even if the sun sets, the residual heat will not dissipate, only the hot people sweat.

Miao Wu and I were in the courtyard to enjoy the coolness, under the porch by the light in the house, I sat there to practice calligraphy, Miao Wu held a fly broom to help me catch mosquitoes and small flying insects. Miao Wu looked at the dark clouds in the sky and said, "Girl, it's hot and tight at this time, I'm afraid it's going to rain heavily." ”

I smiled faintly and said, "That's the best." ”

When he didn't say much, the thunder roared, and between the lightning and thunder, the raindrops the size of beans fell one after another. The downpour began in an instant, dissipating all the residual heat that could not be dispersed just now.

The porch is a good place to watch the rain, but the close-up view is not easy to get wet. With the help of the lamp, my state of mind in writing became more and more calm.

I wrote for a long time, put down my pen, and asked Miao Wu to take the zither. I adjusted the zither and played the song to the sound of the rain.

Everywhere the rain passed, the sky and the earth were confused. The cold palace became more and more miserable, and the sound of Zheng Zheng echoed in the rain, and I was in a trance and recited along with the zither song:

"The jackdaws are sad in the evening, but the willow pond is green but gentle.

If there is no hatred in the eyes of the church, you don't believe that there is a white head in the world.

The intestines have been broken, the tears are hard to collect, and the lovesickness is back in the Little Red Mansion.

Affection has been cut off by the mountain, and it is not free to rely on the trunk. ”

I don't know how much time passed, in the heavy rain, Ah Han stood at the door, and the little eunuch held an umbrella behind him. We were just like each other, one standing in the doorway, the other lightly stroking the kite, with this heavy rain in between.

The Queen Mother is right, it's all sin. You can't redeem it by any amount of money.

It's just that in such a heavy rain, my heart is also much clearer. In this life, I don't want to live like this anymore, I have nothing to lose. Ahan, I can't afford to lose.

He was still standing there quietly in the heavy rain, and I stopped and called faintly, "Ah Han." ”

He was stunned, but then smiled reassuringly and strode under the porch.

I watched him approach and asked, "How's the matter at court?" ”

Ah Han smiled slightly and comforted: "You can still control it." I nodded, looking at the heavy rain in the dark night, can I still control it? I alone can't control all of this.

Miao Wu saw that I had nothing to say again, so she smiled and said, "Your Majesty, our girl also embroidered a purse for you." ”

I just looked at the heavy rain outside, and I knew that Miao Wu was kind, she didn't want me to look like I had nothing to love after losing my child, and she wanted me to get out of this cage sooner. I didn't say anything more, Miao Wu took out the embroidered purse in the house and handed it to Ah Han.

Ah Han looked at it for a long time, and asked with a smile, "Why is it Hongyan this time?" He smiled lightly, "I thought Xi'er would embroider mandarin ducks." ”

I can't tell Ah Han that the mandarin duck is not a loyal bird, and I have now learned what to say and what not to say to Ah Han. What I said before should be honest with each other, and I would never dare to try my current situation.

Why embroidered Hongyan, if it was me before, I would probably give Ah Han the sentence "Thousands of miles of stratus clouds, thousands of mountains and twilight snow, who does the shadow go to?" "Come and tell Ah Han that the wild goose is a loyal bird, and will tell him the story of the wild goose hill. However, at this moment, I just smiled lightly and said: "Legend has it that there is a return to the wild goose peak in Hengshan, and the wild goose flies here and stops, no longer flying south, and returns in spring." I can be regarded as a person away from home, and I guess it's a feeling of longing. ”

Ah Han smiled and said, "So this purse has nothing to do with me," said and pretended to reprimand Miao Wudao, "It's a shame that you dare to come and deceive me!" ”

Miao Wu saw that Ah Han was still happy, and she was also a lot more relieved, so she confessed to Ah Han, and Ah Han waved his hand and didn't care. I asked softly, "Didn't you say that, can I say anything to you?" ”

Ah Han was stunned for a moment, then a little surprised, and said, "Yes, anything is fine," he said, holding the purse, "So, I like this purse very much." ”

I was a little puzzled: "What is this?" Prefer this purse? ”

Ah Han smiled slightly and said, "This purse allows you to finally talk to me." ”

I just looked at Ah Han quietly, and I didn't know why I felt guilty and sad. Always missing, when I choose to believe, he chills me again and again, when I choose to be false and wronged, he is really believing. I sighed softly, should I also believe in Ah Han again.

It was late at night, and when Ah Han left, he rarely felt the joy of being like a child. Closing the door, Miaowu and I went to rest.

Miao Wu watched me lean back on the bed and take a nap, and asked me, "Girl, what do you mean by that purse?" ”

I opened my eyes and was surprised, "You can see that?" ”

Miao Wu nodded and said, "Well, when the girl said it, there was no fluctuation in her emotions, and it was definitely not for the wild goose embroidered." ”

I was a little surprised, Miao Wu had already seen it, and Ah Han must have seen it too, so why was he so happy? Is it because of what I asked? I can say anything to him. I sighed, looked at Miao Wu and looked at Miao Wu waiting for me to tell her the reason, and smiled, "You really want to know?" ”

Miao Wu nodded, and I smiled: "There was a poet who went to Bingzhou to take the exam, and met a goose shooter, and I heard this goose shooter say that there were geese flying with wings in the sky, and after one of them was shot, the other goose fell down and died of martyrdom. The poet was moved and shocked by this feeling of being more loyal than people, so he bought this pair of geese, buried them together next to Fenshui, and built a small tomb called "Yanqiu", and the poet also wrote poems to commemorate this event and was praised by people. ”

Miao Wu just listened and said movingly: "Very moved." ”

I looked at Miao Wu a little sad, so I pushed her and said, "Go and get the pen and ink, I want to write a poem." ”

Miao Wu came back to his senses, took the pen and ink, and I picked up the pen to silently express the words of Yanqiu. I looked at it, Miao Wu also stretched out her head to look, and said for a while: "Good sentence, ask the world, what is love, and teach life and death to promise." ”

I turned around and smiled, "I can't see it, you girl still has two more strokes!" ”

Miao Wu pouted and said, "That's right, the slave girls in the former prince's mansion all know a few words, and I am the best." ”

I laughed and said, "How did I not know before?" ”

Miao Wu sighed and said, "Didn't I follow the girl and gain a lot?" ”

I ignored her and said, "Okay, go to sleep." Miao Wu agreed, packed up her things, and rested.