Cheng Lin can't understand my feelings, she still encourages me, her every word is full of irrefutable positive energy, I can see from her eyes that she is sincere, but in her eyes, there is no such thing as the two of us once had together, the only affection she has for me now may just be deep guilt.

I didn't feel a little dazed in my heart, and I suddenly understood that maybe in the past two years, I haven't forgotten Cheng Lin at all, indeed, I have been hating her in my heart, and I have told myself over and over again that I have no feelings for her for a long time, but to some extent, isn't this also a manifestation of obsession?

Realizing this, especially at this time, Cheng Lin's eyes no longer have the affection of the past, I suddenly had an extremely lost sense of fear, I don't know what I am afraid of, but I absolutely do not allow this feeling.

So I faced Cheng Lin's sincere and encouraging gaze, pretending to smile and listen, but I was endlessly slandering her in my heart, only in this way can I regain my self-confidence.

I think you can really pretend to be a prodigal thing, what are you pretending to be tall in front of me now, are you really reserved? Are you really dignified? Have you forgotten when you were yelled at by my X? Can you really be so calm in front of me now?

Under the slander, my weak self-esteem regained the upper hand, I no longer have the previous inferiority complex, I looked at Cheng Lin and smiled, nodded in recognition of everything she said, and said to her at the end, don't worry, I will face my future life well.

Cheng Lin smiled very gratifying when she heard this, maybe she felt that she was saving a long-fallen loser, she seemed to have a sense of accomplishment.

Then Cheng Lin got up to say goodbye to me, she never said a word related to feelings, so I also deeply understood that the feelings that used to exist do not exist anymore, looking at her stepping on high heels 'clicking' away, my mood was extremely lost.

That night, I dreamed of Cheng Lin, dreamed of her voice and smile, dreamed of every detail of her body, I could even really feel her body temperature, smooth texture, as well as her slight foot smell and disordered breathing, I tried my best to enjoy everything she had as a woman, and then I woke up after a violent eruption.

When I woke up, I couldn't sleep anymore, and I stayed open in the endless darkness until dawn.

A few days later, a woman I didn't expect came to see me, Zhang Yan.

Zhang Yan is a petite and dependent woman, a little weak in character, but very beautiful, she is Cheng Lin's best friend, when I was good with Cheng Lin, the three of us were often together.

Zhang Yan's temperament has also changed, she is no longer as pure and weak as before, at least she can look at me with her eyes now, Zhang Yan didn't dare to face my gaze before, sometimes when I look at her, she will hurriedly run away, her eyes keep flashing, and her cheeks seem to be red.

At that time, I had thought more than once about whether Zhang Yan liked me, after all, her performance in front of my eyes was sometimes too much, like a girl who was in love for the first time.

But at that time, I didn't have any distracting thoughts about Zhang Yan, all my thoughts were on Cheng Lin, but one night I dreamed of Zhang Yan inexplicably, in the dream I was obviously Cheng Lin, but for some reason suddenly became Zhang Yan, she catered to me shyly and timidly, without a little wave, but that expression was very charming, which made me unforgettable for a long time.

Of course, because of that dream, I feel very shameless, how can I dream of other women behind Cheng Lin's back? Especially Zhang Yan is still Cheng Lin's best friend and her best friend, so I have been deeply blaming myself in my heart for a while.

Now facing Zhang Yan, my thoughts have changed a lot, I think that a woman with a weak temperament like Zhang Yan also has a wave, that's for sure, but I can't imagine what kind of performance she will have when she waves.

Any woman is a waste, that's the only conclusion I came to about all women after what I went through, maybe a little extreme, but I can't change that noomind.

Zhang Yan asked me, how have you been doing in the past two years? I said fine.

I asked her how she was doing? She said she was married.

I almost casually asked if you got married on the night, but fortunately I didn't go crazy yet, I just looked at her obviously much bigger breasts than the original and sighed sincerely, you have grown up, it's good.

Zhang Yan thought that I was praising her for becoming mature, so she happily joked, did I always be a soft and weak little girl who didn't understand anything in your eyes before?

I smiled and shook my head and said no, but I was thinking, did you really not understand anything before? At least you're a wave in my dreams.

Then Zhang Yan said another sentence, this sentence made my heart ache, she said, Cheng Lin is also about to get married, she may ...... in the future Won't be coming to see you again.

I was silent for a long time before I calmed down, I nodded calmly and said, it should be like this, what if she is married and still comes to see me.

Zhang Yan looked at me without blinking, and asked faintly, are you very sad to hear this news?

I smiled indifferently, and I said that the sad time had long passed, and that there had been nothing between me and her two years ago.

Zhang Yan sighed, she said, I really can't figure out why the two of you were at that time, Cheng Lin She is not that kind of woman at all......

I waved my hand and didn't let Zhang Yan continue, there are so many things that I can't figure out, no reason or excuse can replace the facts, not to mention that Cheng Lin has no reason at all, since everyone can't figure it out, why do you always mention that matter? We're not Detective Conan.

Zhang Yan said again, in the past, everything I was outside was kept by Cheng Lin, but now that she is about to get married, it is not very convenient......

I don't think I have anything outside, the house is rented, and the home furnishings are not worth much, the only thing is that Cheng Lin and I have the same savings, I don't know how much, but I never thought that there were things that belonged to me there, when I used to hand over my salary to Cheng Lin every month, those already belonged to her, and I never thought that those had anything to do with me.

Zhang Yan still continued, so I will keep the belongings outside for you for the time being......

I shook my head and said, "No need, I don't have anything outside, even if there is, it's not mine, since Cheng Lin is getting married, those will be taken as gifts." ”

Maybe Zhang Yan was moved, there was something rare in her eyes, she said, don't be like this, after you go out, life still has to live, and Cheng Lin will definitely not want it, she will no longer keep it for you, because she is getting married, so I took it over for her, in fact, we don't want you to ......

I waved my hand, I didn't want to continue, I said I'm a little tired, if it's okay, you can go back early, don't come to see me again, I'm doing well in it, and you're a married woman...... Well, so be it.

I was in a very messy mood, so I didn't know what I wanted to express after saying it, Zhang Yan was also a little dazed, and when she saw me standing up and wanting to leave, she had to stand up and prepare to leave.

I suddenly remembered something, and I couldn't help but turn around again and ask Zhang Yan the last sentence, I said, what has the outside world become now?

Zhang Yan was stunned for a moment, and thought for a long time before saying that it has changed a lot, and many things in her previous memories may no longer exist.

I nodded, said no more, and turned to leave.

It's just that at the moment I turned around, I vaguely heard Zhang Yan's sobbing......