Lao Wu said angrily: "Am I the kind of person who dares to do it? ”

Su Dong spread his hands: "Look! Still did it! ”

Lao Wu pretended to be angry and wanted to leave. Pen Fun Pavilion www.biquge.info Su Dong hurriedly pulled: "I'm just kidding, look at how small your popularity is!" ”

After Lao Wu was pulled back, he calmed down his agitated heart: "There is this kind of uncivilized phenomenon!" ”

Su Dong: "How strong my sense of justice is, I get angry when I see this, I'm so angry that I can't do it, I have to talk about them!" It's so unbelievable! ”

Lao Wu said affirmatively: "Yes, I have to talk about them!" ”

Su Dong made a deep groan, and after a while, he picked up the fan on the table as a pen, and wrote in the void, "This comrade, I want to criticize you!" How can you scribble here? Do you still have any qualities? Do you still have a sense of public morality? How did your dad teach you? How did your mom teach you? How did your grandfather teach you? How did your grandma teach you? How did your aunt teach you? How did your eighth aunt and grandmother teach you? ”

Lao Wu looked at Su Dong dumbfounded!

The audience below was laughing and trembling!

"I can't do it! Su Dong is so funny! ”

"I think I'm going to have to laugh anymore!"

"Oh my God, that's funny!"

"Oops, tears are coming out!"

Su Dong relieved himself and said: "Anyway, I scolded him on the wall with more than a thousand words!" It's infuriating! ”

Lao Wu glared again and said, "More than a thousand words? ”

Su Dong: "That's right, they're too uncivilized!" ”

Lao Wu pointed at Su Dong and said: "People write a 'visit here' at most four words, and you write more than a thousand words?" You're more uncivilized than him, you! ”

Su Dong rolled his eyes: "Why am I uncivilized?" Our section chief praised me after seeing it, he said Xiao Su, you have done a good job, and when you see this kind of uncivilized behavior, you must resolutely criticize and correct it! ”

Lao Wu said angrily: "What kind of section chief are you, something will happen sooner or later!" ”

"It's still very good for you to say, isn't it a few days before something happens."

Lao Wu asked, "What's wrong?" ”

Su Dong: "Travel abroad that day...... No, we called a trip abroad and met pirates in the Caribbean. ”

Lao Wu was startled, "Huh! Really? ”

Su Dong: "The pirate took out his gun when he got on the ship, and it cost five million!" ”

Lao Wu asked, "What should I do then?" ”

Su Dong waved his hand calmly: "It's still our section chief who has experienced a hundred battles, and he directly found the pirate's leader and said, 'It's okay to ask for five million, but you have to open me a ticket for one hundred million'!" ”

Lao Wu asked in surprise: "This?" ”

Su Dong said: "Don't you know, those pirates are crying, they say that you still make money!" ”

The audience saw it, and the audience laughed again.

Giving gifts to the relationship, satirizing eating and drinking with public funds, ironizing the uncivilized phenomenon of tourism, and bluntly saying that public funds are reimbursed.

This is the most basic means of cross talk! This is a very advanced artistic expression!

"Hey, why are you still watching CCTV's Lantern Festival party! Go online to check the Lantern Festival party of Allure video, Su Dong has a new cross talk! ”

"Really? Didn't experts say that Su Dong, a person outside the cross talk circle, couldn't say anything good about cross talk? ”

"Do you believe the words of the experts? Silly, right? ”

"Can't you see that it's a professional trust? Experts also say that smog is not harmful to the human body, do you believe it?"

"But Su Dong isn't a professional crosstalker?"

"Oh...... Then you stay here, brother, I won't accompany you. ”

"Alright then, I'll check it out too!"

Lao Wu then asked, "Then how did things go?" ”

Su Dong sighed and said, "What else can I do." ”

Old Wu: "Huh? ”

Su Dong said helplessly: "After I go back, my section chief will be double. It's regulated! ”

Lao Wu Le said: "Hey, this kind of person should have been shuanggui a long time ago!" ”

Su Dong sighed with emotion: "Later, the people from our department still took things to see him. ”

Lao Wu was puzzled: "Why do you still see him?" ”

Su Dong said: "Condolences to Shuang. Regulate the old cadres. ”

Lao Wu also cried and laughed: "Dushuang. Where are you going to go to condole! ”

Su Dong said bitterly: "As a result, I was also unlucky, the organization found out about my gift-giving, and I was also expelled." ”

Lao Wu clapped his hands and said, "You did it yourself." ”

Su Dong: "I am very disappointed after losing my job, Yanjing is so big, where is my home?" I suddenly want to buy a suite. ”

Lao Wu: "Huh! Yanjing's house prices are precious! Are you sure to buy a house here? ”

Su Dong: "Yes, then I heard that a real estate expert held a large lecture, telling when to buy a house is the most appropriate, I said I have to go, paid the registration fee, a group of us listened at the bottom, the expert on the stage chirped from 6 o'clock in the morning to 8 o'clock in the evening, analyzing the trend of housing prices. ”

Lao Wu nodded: "People are professional." ”

Su Dong said: "In the end, I came to a conclusion, when is the best time to buy a house? ”

Lao Wu asked expectantly, "When?" I also specifically want to know. ”

Su Dong pondered for a moment: "...... Year! ”

"How much? Year! I still used you to say it the year before last!? That's all there is to talk about for more than ten hours? ”

Su Dong said angrily: "That's right! ”

Lao Wu said angrily: "What kind of experts are these!" ”

The audience and friends can hear it, Su Dong is taking the opportunity to mock those experts who say that he Su Dong doesn't understand cross talk.

Many friends on the Internet chatted again, and this time there were many topics.

"Condolences to the double. Regulate the old cadres, this method is good, or I will go to the Commission for Discipline Inspection one day to wander around. ”

"Yes, go ahead, young man!"

"Hehe, this time the people of the whole country have begun to discuss the housing prices in Yanjing again. Why are housing prices so high in Yanjing is a question. ”

"I don't plan to have a house in Yanjing, and I can't afford it, I just want to see Su Dong and see how he fights with experts and professors, didn't those experts say that Su Dong can't speak cross talk, but why do I hear cross talk so good, could it be that I heard it wrong?"

"Those expert lectures are all fools, and after paying the money, they will tell you some nonsense, some useless scum."

"Don't say that, people are experts after all."

"Bullshit experts, go see for yourselves how many viewers the video is looking at right now."

"Last time it was 450 million, this time it's ...... Oh my God, 530 million! This is going to blow up the sky! That means one-third of the country's population is tuning in to watch the show! ”

"Upstairs is calm, this show is global-oriented, in foreign countries, as long as you have a Allure mobile phone, you can watch any work under Allure Entertainment."

Lao Wu continued: "So you chose to sing and make movies later? ”

When the audience saw this, they thought to themselves, is Su Dong going to sing for a while? I'm looking forward to it!

"There's no way, who made me handsome. In fact, whether the above is good or not, the audience praised me, and what everyone said was not wrong at all, I just ate soft rice. ”

Lao Wu covered his mouth: "You said it yourself!" When I got off the stage, my leader wanted to find me, but I told you the truth, I didn't lead it. ”

"It's okay, what are you afraid of, I'm proud of eating soft rice!"

"Look, this is still proud, what can you be proud of when you eat soft rice?"

Su Dong waved his hand: "You don't understand this!" Eat hard rice with teeth, eat soft rice well, eat fast! ”

Lao Wu wiped the sweat on his forehead, "That's what you mean by eating soft rice." ”

"So what do you think?"

"Huh~~~" The audience below booed loudly.

Lao Wu said: "Listen, not only I mean this, but the audience is the same as I think." ”

Su Dong didn't know where to take out a mirror: "It's so handsome!" I've been getting more and more handsome since I ate soft rice. ”

"Ahem!" Lao Wu took Su Dong's hand holding the mirror: "The people of the whole country are looking at it, you look like this, you want to go home with a stinky beauty!" ”

Su Dong was unhappy: "What's wrong with me?" Isn't it just looking for a mirror? ”

Lao Wu educated Su Dong and said: "You said that everything is bad for you, how can you get good when you look at everything you do?" You don't want to order a good one yourself, and you don't want to go to a good one, so how can you get better? ”

"So what should I do?" Su Dong asked Lao Wu.

"What should I do?" Lao Wu said: "You should do more sunny and positive things, find a down-to-earth and stable job, don't always think about taking shortcuts, don't slip around at work, work steadfastly, and be a man of your duty, so that everything will be fine!" ”

Su Dong was taught: "Listening to your words is better than ten years of books!" Mr. Wu, don't worry, I will definitely sing more beautiful songs and make more good-looking movies to give back to everyone, so that "Everything is fine"! ”

The cross talk ended, and the two bowed to the audience. Lao Wu left, and Su Dong remained on the stage.

"Everyone, everyone, Lao Wu has left, and now the whole stage is mine, I feel that the whole person is not too good! I'm inflated! ”

"Haha! Su Dong, I really didn't know that the idol I liked was actually such a person! ”

"Drunk, drunk! Su Dong, you can! Lao Wu hurriedly returned to the scene to collect this demon! ”

"What about Su Chengcheng, if you don't come out to take care of your family Su Dong, he will be inflated!"

"Isn't there anyone in charge? Pull him down! ”

Su Dong was just joking, "It's just a joke just now, let's invite Su Dong, a famous host, a famous actor, a famous director, a famous advertising planner, and other famous talents to sing a song for everyone!" ”

"Huh~~" The disgusted voice below sounded.

"It's over, this kid has completely given up on treatment!"

"Oh mom, I was just immersed in the gray and beautiful cross talk between Su Dong and Lao Wu, but Su Dong, why did you give me this whole thing! Still shameless? ”

"My God, since the start of the show, how did he become unknown to us. Where was the previous cold man? Where is the big brother next door? Where is the warm male god? Please pack the table and mail it to my home! Thank you! (To be continued.) )