"Won't I be able to get out?" I asked the 'me' in this dream, which was the exact opposite of my personality. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

'I' nodded: "That's right, our personalities are too different, we can't awaken at the same time." If you think about a person talking to himself, how scary it is to change two expressions. So, if I go out, you have to stay, if I stay, you have to get out, or you'll never wake up, it's narcolepsy. But don't worry, I'll be back soon, and it's no fun to stay outside. ”

I was a little scared; "Am I going to stay here for a long time? Can you talk to me about what I forgot before you go out. "I've acquiesced to another one to face the wind and rain outside, but there is always an inexplicable worry.

'I' stroked my hair and reassured me not to worry with a bright smile.

"Don't worry." This sentence often appeared in my mind, I always thought it was the version but said it to me, but this time I heard it, and this voice sounded in my ears again, not Ban Que's voice, it was my own voice: "Don't worry, it'll be fine." ”

I grabbed 'my' hand that reached out to me to stroke my hair, and eagerly confirmed to her, "You said it, and I always hear this sentence from you?" ”

'I' nodded, and waved at me impatiently: "Every time I feel that you are in trouble and subconsciously look for me, I will say this to you, so that you don't bother me." I'm afraid of trouble. ”

"Then why do you want to help me this time, if you're afraid of trouble, you can encourage me as usual." I looked at 'me' unhappy and asked, "You just cried because of me?" ”

"No, it's because of other things, things you don't need to know. Okay, I'll go out, you can take advantage of this time to have a good rest, and when I come back, everything will be calm. "'I' kicked away the bottle of wine that was blocking her way, waved her hand, and the dream line was transformed into a clean bedroom, which was different from the smell of alcohol just now, this time there was a good smell of trees in the dream, and 'I' pointed to the bed: "You can sleep well, wake up, and everything will be fine." ”

"Will I forget what happened to me, then?" Will I forget Li Jing, will I forget the memories of him?

'I' walked over and touched my head, "It's really different." ”

"What do you mean?" I looked at me in confusion, "What's the difference?" ”

'I' didn't speak, waved at me and left the room.

"Wait a minute." I stopped 'me'.

"What's wrong?" 'I' asked looking back at the door.

I pointed to my head and asked, "Do you know Su Baijia?" is Su Baijia in the previous case. I promised him that if the matter was done and the truth was known, I would definitely tell him the truth about his father's death. If you could help? I looked at her expectantly.

"Got it, I'll tell him that his father, Su Jin, didn't die of a drug overdose."

Hearing 'me' answer, I nodded and said thank you, and then completely lay down on the big bed in my dream, and fell into endless darkness.

When I woke up again, no, couldn't use me anymore. Because it is not Zhu Xiaozhi who occupies this body now. I forgot to introduce myself, my name is Zhu Zizhi, I am another personality of this body, and Shuangshang can completely crush the personality that appeared in front of you before, that is, the master personality. Actually, I alternated with her early on. I think she must have seen in her dreams the first time she saw me, and the next few times she saw me. Whenever she wanted to forget something, she would habitually go to me in her dreams, which was usually a tricky thing, and many times it was something he didn't want to face at all. It is not so much that I co-exist with him, but that I am a second personality that she has internally differentiated to escape. In more understandable but ugly terms, his main personality is a selfish and cowardly coward, and his second personality, which is me, is a strong and intelligent genius, and I can solve all the problems and then go back to my memory and sleep peacefully.

That's right, the three scenes Zhu Xiaozhi saw in the dream were the three transactions in which she and I exchanged control of the body. Now that I think about the fact that he agreed to trade with me, or that I had the first chance to see the world for myself, instead of reading the data he stole from me, it was cruel to me.

Zhu Xiaozhi's childhood was still very happy before the age of three, and like all ordinary children, she enjoyed the love of both parents, and I was not awakened from her mind at that time, or I did not exist at that time. In the years since I woke up, I would read from her brain the memories she had of when she was in trouble while I was resting, so I felt all the joy she had before she was three years old, the fond memories of being surrounded by all kinds of delicate dolls, stuffed dolls, and treats. But when she was three years old, her family suffered a change. said that it was a change, but in fact, it was already arranged in the dark. Her parents, how to say, should also be my parents? In short, the city and the gang were not members of the gang, but they were also involved in a big fight, the garment factory doomed them to lose, and in order to keep their children alive, they transferred the children to a friend they had always trusted. But for a child who is not yet sensible, the most painful thing is not to make him face death, it is only a moment of fear, and even he does not know the meaning of death, but it is far less frightening than telling her that her parents will leave her world forever. It happened in the summer when she was three years old, when she woke up in the morning and saw only his mother, who helped her get dressed and then asked an uncle to take her away. This uncle is the man she has been calling the boss since then, and the one who has been taking care of her life since she was three years old. It's just that since the boss took her out of the house that day, in the long life that followed, she never played with his closest parents, and she never saw them again. It was at that time that I was born, and they kept looking for him after the gang learned that their family had transferred her to their friends in order to keep her from being harmed. In order to ensure her safety, the Boss took her out of the city and went to a small village in the south, where she hid for a few years, and only when things were calm did the Boss take her back here. Later, in the small village where Zheng Min temporarily placed Ban Que's ashes, he found an old aunt who was not so old at the time to take care of her. But at that time, the old grandmother was already taking care of me.

At that time, she was not very adaptable, and suddenly came to a strange gold, and she was naturally afraid to cry and go home every day. The boss also seemed to have something to do with the incident at that time, until Xiaozhi's parents handed over the child to him to take care of it and wanted to save his life, so at that time, he was also worried about his life every day, so every time Xiaozhi cried, he felt more worried. He was young at the time and had no experience with children, and caring for a child who had just left his parents and only knew how to cry was more like torture for him. So in the end, when he couldn't bear it anymore, he told Xiaozhi the truth: "Your parents will never come to pick you up, your parents are dead, and you have no parents anymore." ”

Maybe Xiao Zhi didn't understand what death was at the time, but Xiao Zhi understood what it meant to never come to pick her up. In fact, when people are the saddest, there is really no way to stop tears, even if it is like a child who does not understand the world, so after Xiaozhi cried silently for a day and a night, after crying until she fell asleep, she saw me in a dream, and I had just woken up. Maybe it was because I looked exactly like her, which made her curious about me, and she asked me who I was, and I was relatively young at the time, and there was no way to lie to her, and I didn't know that I was a second personality at the time, I just woke up, so I told her that I was another her. Of course, Xiaozhi was full of curiosity about the world when she was very young, so she immediately came to me and asked me if there was another mother, and I didn't know how to answer her, because I didn't understand many things, so I fooled around in the dream, and then I took control of this body for the first time while she was immersed in the dream that her parents might still be alive.

Then I woke up and saw the world with real eyes, and to be honest, it felt really good. The boss may have felt a sense of conscience because he felt that he had bullied a child like me, so he was careful to talk to me in the morning. When the eldest was young, in addition to his temper being a little frizzy, he was generally a very reliable person and did a good job of housework. Seeing that I don't cry anymore can report that I take good care of me. Because I don't have any memories of my parents, I can't feel Xiaozhi's sadness, and of course I won't cry anymore. And this strange world is like a paradise for me, very interesting. The old grandmother who took care of me (who was not very old at the time) was a very gentle person, but I couldn't understand her dialect, but she cooked delicious food and beautiful clothes. During the day, she made clothes at home, and I played in the yard around her poultry and an old cat. Strangely enough, the old cat never seemed to have any interest in the fowl, but just lay on the roof or in the yard every day in the sun, and occasionally at noon when I didn't want to take a nap, he would come over and lie down next to me, rub my ankles, and then find a comfortable position to sleep next to me.

The boss should have gone to the town to find a job to do, he didn't learn before, he ate and waited for death every day, but once he found that he couldn't continue the previous chaotic life, and when he had a child, he had a rare sense of responsibility, and he was shocked to find a job to support two people. The boss himself is not stupid, and even very smart, and soon he started some small business in the town and made some money, but he didn't spread his voice, after all, he didn't know what it was like outside at that time, and he still needed to protect himself and Xiaozhi in a low-key manner. So he just did some small business and lived a small life of self-sufficiency. It wasn't until he heard that the wind had calmed down that he decided to leave the mountain village with Ash.

When Xiaozhi returned there, it should have been more than 2 years since his parents died, probably before he went to elementary school, the eldest brought back a boy from home, yes, Ban Que, the person who later made Xiaozhi crazy and infatuated. I've always been skeptical of Xiaozhi's vision. How to say it, the first time I saw Ban Que, he was still a hairy boy, he should have gone to elementary school, anyway, he was a very arrogant hairy boy, and I hated him very much when I saw him at first sight. Ban Que looked at me with a vicious look in his eyes, and it was rare for anyone to look at me so well. In order not to let others find out about my existence, I always look very well-behaved, the aunts in the kindergarten like me very much, and there are often very cute children around me to play with me, and I am rarely looked at with that kind of eyes. And he would rob my things, and many times he would tell me that those things belonged to him after he was done. But if you think about it, a child who falls in love with a kindergarten child, what good things can be, but it's just some plush dolls or something, and he doesn't play after signing it, but he doesn't let me play, so I hate him very much. But in terms of strength, I definitely couldn't beat him at that time. So after thinking about it, I chose to ignore him.

But I realized that the boss noticed that I was different. It was dinnertime, and Ban Que was doing my homework at that time, and he didn't let me watch cartoons, so the boss took me outside to play. I still remember that it was almost autumn at that time, and the night was already starting to get a little cooler, and there were always a lot of people queuing up to play on the swing, and at that time she just stood there empty waiting for someone to play with her. I wasn't even 6 years old at the time, and I was still a very fun-loving age, so when I saw no one, I ran over and played by myself. The eldest sat down on the bench provided for the adults and asked if I still wanted my mother.

Although I have no influence on them, I also know that if I say I don't want to now, it will definitely arouse the suspicion of outsiders, after all, I used to cry every day to find my parents, and I was the one who made me cry and faint. But you made me cry at the time, and I still couldn't do it, so I could only sit on the swing and nod cautiously. I said that the boss was very smart, but he had already seen what was happening to me, and he asked me some questions, and I just nodded or shook my head, and then patted me on the head and asked me if I had forgotten my parents. I was very scared at the time, thinking that if I confessed, I would be left behind by the boss, after all, I was not the real Xiaozhi.

The boss just squatted on the swing and watched me, and then he probably got up and shook his legs, probably because his legs were numb. I didn't have any interest in continuing to swing, so I took the boss by the hand and walked home with him.

"It's not the same when you wake up." After walking for a while, the boss said to me, "At first I was just sensible to you, and I didn't notice anything strange. But lately I've noticed that something is getting more and more wrong, and you can see a kind of hostility in Banque's eyes. This kind of look will not appear in Xiaozhi's eyes. ”

"Ban Que owes the trick first, I'm just fighting back at him, why don't you talk about him?" I used to hate complaining, but now that the boss has discovered something strange, it is very likely that he will find out my identity, so I still chose to sue Ban Que.

"I know. But Xiaozhi, whom I know, will never make that kind of expression, Ash is very timid and easily injured, if he is really bullied, he will keep crying and looking for me to help her, instead of fighting with Ban Que, and he will not be invited at all. Xiaozhi's mother once said that she would not be allowed to fight, and she has always been very obedient. ”

"So, what do you mean, do you think I'm disobedient?" I could hear something wrong with the boss's words, but I didn't know how to answer him at the time, I hadn't gone to school yet, I hadn't been exposed to the adult world.

The boss shook his head: "No, I don't think you're her at all." "It's over, the boss can see it all.

But he was helpless with me, he squatted down and looked at me at eye level, I didn't dare to look into his eyes, the most popular he gave up confronting me, just took my hand and asked me if I could return Xiaozhi to him, it was a debt he owed to his parents, no matter what, he had to protect her and watch her grow up.

"You didn't protect her." At that time, I had already learned to sneer, and this was thanks to Ban Que's cold words every day.

"I know." The boss nodded, "I'll find a way, but I can't let Ban Que leave, his existence is a kind of protection for Xiaozhi, maybe you can't understand, but believe me, if he's there, no one will trouble Xiaozhi." ”

"What if Xiaozhi comes back and faces his bullying? Xiaozhi can't handle it. "I looked into the eyes of the boss, it's not that I don't want to go back, it's just that this body has two souls at the same time, and if it is, I will disappear with her. I don't believe that Ban Que will be very good to Xiaozhi, and I even have a premonition that sooner or later, Ban Que will kill Xiaozhi. So I'm not trying to protect another soul, I'm going to protect this body from anything. I was young, but my will to survive was much stronger than Xiaozhi's. Xiaozhi and I are diametrically opposed personalities, it is blindly evasive, I am blindly attacking. But at least I can protect myself from harm, but what would it be like to hand it back to Xiaozhi? Is it possible for me to see the world again? I have had a great attachment to this world since I was a child.

The boss grabbed me by the shoulder and told me that he promised not to let Banque hurt Xiaozhi in the slightest, so he asked me to return Xiaozhi no matter what. But I was confused, and I suddenly remembered Amma, who was always smiling at me in that little mountain village, and I suddenly missed the old cat in the little yard, and the flock of fowl that were always throwing food. I changed all the things in the small mountain village, including the boss who I thought could solve all the problems at that time. But now everything has changed, no one will look at me gently and laugh all day, no one will make me beautiful clothes, no one will cook delicious home-cooked food, no one will sing me those beautiful songs that I don't understand to lull me to sleep. I suddenly experienced how Xiaozhi felt when he first went to that small mountain village. I suddenly threw myself into the arms of the boss and cried, "I miss Grandma." "At that time, I was still a little child, and I didn't know that this mood was actually an escape, so I could only let myself cry and express my inner dissatisfaction.

The boss just patted me on the back and told me that he would definitely protect Xiaozhi and ask me to change Xiaozhi back. I didn't know what to do, so I cried and fell asleep, in my dream I saw Xiaozhi, she was reading a storybook I had read before, it turned out that everything you did would really be remembered by your brain, and there was a couple I didn't know sitting next to her, Xiaozhi was very similar to them, it should be Xiaozhi's parents, right? They seemed to be telling her a story, I walked over and sat next to them, and Ash saw me, but they didn't look up at me as if they didn't see me, Ash was always alive in his memory. At that moment, I decided on the idea of staying and returning Ash to the boss. Is it possible that if I stay here, I can also see the memories of the past and live with my old grandmother?

Xiaozhi greeted me and said that I didn't lie to her, and that he really met his parents here. She seemed so happy, and when he saw me, I was completely like the one who came, and I suddenly became a little jealous of her.

"It's time for you to go back." I told her.

She looked at me suspiciously and asked why? I lied to her that she had been here too long and that it was time to change shifts with me. She looked at her mom and dad with nostalgia, and I knew he didn't want to go out, he had been trapped in his memory, and he was still as timid as he wanted to come.

But the scene that shocked me was before my eyes, and I saw her father holding her in his arms and asking her if she wanted to be a brave little doll. Although she began to cry again, she eventually bit her lip and nodded, tearfully promising them to be a brave child. After that her father put him on the ground and disappeared from behind him. She came running over to me and cried and said she wanted to change with me, she wiped her tears, pretending to be strong, and it was really funny to think about it now. But I was suddenly relieved, looking at him didn't seem to be as timid as I thought, she should be able to face those bad things, right? Anyway, the boss has already promised me that he will protect her, so just trust him once. If you are really in danger, Xiaozhi will come back to me again for help, right? Let's talk about it then, now I need to get a good night's sleep, so that I can go back to the small mountain village in my memory to meet the old grandma. (To be continued.) )