"Mom, I'm back!"

She's watching Animal World again.

"Mom, your son is back, is your reaction so cold?"

"You care about me, it's best if you don't come back!"

Roar ...... Mom is angry, hey, hey, she has such a cute time.

I deliberately got very close to her, and my mother was very arrogant to dodge, and I moved my ass a little over, and she moved a little away until the armrest of the couch cut her way. There's no escape! Watch my nirvana rub my cheeks!

"Really...... Isn't it okay to come back so late and come back early? ”

"Well, the school is still a little far from the subway station, and there are many people on the subway every time you get to a station, and you have to squeeze people for a while to get in."

"Yes, then I'll give you some extra money and call it when you get home?"

I heard you right! Give me money? Such a stingy mom......

"By the way, I still have Gong Na to call, anyway, she doesn't dare to say no!"

Hehe, it's really a mother, not an alien stand-in.

"Forget it, don't bother Sister Qi anymore, I'm good at doing the subway."

"Yes, then you have to come back early, and you are not allowed to stay when you go home after school."

"Yes, yes, yes! By the way, I'm going to cook. ”

As soon as I got up, I was entangled in something strange, a long strip of red and rough like my tongue that secreted mucus. What is that thing called? Because my mother is a ghost with a spinal mutation, which is a derivative of the spine, and it grows like a tail behind the buttocks, my mother and I are directly called "tails".

"What's the matter, Mom?"

"Don't go, I've eaten."

"You've eaten me, but I haven't eaten yet!"

Mom slowly took out a bag from her bag and said, "Let's eat jerky tonight, I'm too lazy to make dinner." ”

I took the jerky, took a few bites bitterly, sat back beside her and said, "It turns out that you have to teach me a lesson when I am lazy and don't want to make dinner, how can I do it now?" ”

I suddenly felt a little impatient and said, "Mom, I'm going to do my homework." ”

As a result, nature was immediately pulled back again.

"What's 'Mom, I'm going to do my homework.'" , will you go to do your homework well? Mom, how did I lie to your grandmother? ”

"But you just let me sit like this, I'm so bored!"

Mom threw the remote control to me without saying a word. I said that this is really rare, she has always dominated the remote control, so that I can only use the computer to watch anime, now I can take care of my family's most expensive home appliance - 56-inch HDTV!

My mother and I each bought a paid channel, I bought naturally the kind of channel that broadcasts Japanese and Chinese subtitles anime every day, and my mother bought a channel full of "Animal World" programs, I said that my mother shouldn't buy a TV drama channel? What a strange interest. Let's not talk about this, let's watch the anime!

Hi! Hello everyone, I'm Huo Xie who crossed over from the world line five seconds later, and I deliberately crossed it not for anything else, but to make a high-energy warning. Special note: The main character, Huo Xie, does not have the ability to travel through time, but the author threw me over for fun. It's far away, so let's get down to business......

Gentlemen (perverts), put on your headphones, put your hands on your keyboard, and double-check your room for a creature called "Mom". Okay, you're all set......

Five!

Four!

Three!

Two!

One!

"Ahh

I silently changed the table.

Hahaha,Although you're a pay radio station, how can you play it! No.,It's not that good.,It's just a general edge ball.,It's just an accident (the author deliberately) let the male owner rub the girl's breasts.,That's it! But ah, my mother is right next to me, how do you tell me to explain it to her!

"Son!"

"Yes!"

"Mom, as soon as I saw you enter the door, I was full of spring and high spirits. Do you want to go to school to do this kind of thing? ”

I want to deny it, but I have this expectation in my heart, it would be nice if the plot just happened to me, even if I was beaten, it would be cool! I didn't know how to answer, I just remained silent.

"You refuse to take a taxi or ask Gong Na to pick you up, is it possible that you have an affair on the subway?"

I was shocked.

"Guess right? Could it be that the girl she likes sits in the same subway with herself, like this every day, but she doesn't dare to confess when she meets every day, so she can only ...... silently and humbly Watching her. ”

"Mom! Don't forget your setting, how can you gossip like this, so ...... It's as disgusting as a girl's cancer! ”

"Setting? What is that? ”

"Uh...... Don't worry about what I'm talking about! ”

"Son, in fact, if you want the opposite sex, Mom, I fully support it. The lifespan of a ghost is only about thirty years, and you are sixteen years old this year, and you are all a 'middle-aged person', not only not early, but a little late. I said that Xiaoyu is good, the little girl is good-looking and likes you a lot. ”

"Did I say you're the mother of the second dimension? is in such a hurry to marry his son, isn't it generally against his son's early love? ”

"What a two-dimensional thing, look at how three-dimensional my mother is!" He snapped his fingers as he spoke.

Occasional sale - pumpkin cake! How can I have such a mother! This generation gap is not ordinarily big

Mom asked, "By the way, how is school life?" What else do you do besides looking for females? ”

"That's right, Mom showed you this!"

I took out the sketches I had taken home from my bag.

Mom looked at the uncolored line drawings and made a "uh-huh" sound in her throat.

"I'd like to say it's really good...... But you're not going to inherit my mother's business and become a cartoonist? Whatever you want! ”

"The table is so hypocritical!" I pointed to my mother's little nose and said, "You definitely want me to inherit your inheritance, if I really choose comics, you will not stand in the way!" ”

"You know me too well!" Mom reached out and messed up my hairstyle, my precious hairstyle!

"Go, go! My hairstyle! I spat on my hand and straightened my hair. (I won't tell you the truth about hairspray hands!) At least that's what I did as a hairspray hand. ）

"Comics are just a temporary hobby, and I will honestly inherit your career, which is good for everyone. But let me tell you, there are two cartoon ghosts in the furniture section of our school, so I'll bring some raw materials, so I don't have to eat the strange paste grains (rice) and rancid water (vegetable soup) at noon! ”

"Not bad! What a skill to meet new people so quickly! Mom rarely complimented me, "So do you have human friends?" ”

"Yes! Lin Danda, that is an absolute friend, the boy that Sister Min Min said! ”

Mom nodded and said, "How is he?" Min Min said that he was a very real child, and he was very tall and handsome! ”

"It's very real and tall, but he's so dark, I think he can play Master Bao without makeup and black!"

"Haha, is it that dark?"

"I just want to say that maybe the real Bao Zheng is not as dark as him!" I unconsciously spread my hands as I spoke, like this:

╮(￣▽￣)╭

"By the way, there is also a girl named Qin Xin, she is Sister Minmin's best friend, and she is so hostile to me."

Mom squinted at me and said, "She's hostile to you?" ”

"Yes."

"Qin Xin, she is very beautiful?"

"Yes."

Mom stroked herself with a "I know everything" expression. Hmph, I'm too lazy to pay attention to you!

"Mom, and the teachers at school are so funny, Aunt Ye Zi is still so funny. There is also Teacher Long, who teaches us Chinese, she turned out to be the up master of station b, and I suddenly wanted to see her video. I'm going to ask her ID tomorrow, and by the way, she said it seems like a secret! ”

"Uh, is it a female teacher or a male teacher?"

"Female teacher...... Belch...... Hahahaha...... "Mom's eyes are so scared," Mom don't play, so I won't dare to associate with women in the future. ”

Mom spits out the tip of her tongue and looks at the ceiling at an angle of 45 degrees.

"That's right, that's right! I said that Lin Danda seems to have a good impression of Teacher Long, I think it's just a teacher-student relationship, but Sister Min Min is sometimes jealous! Mom, you haven't seen it, Sister Minmin is super cute! ”

"Haha, it's good to be young!"

I said, "(*^__^*)"

"Son, what were you talking about?" Mom looked surprised.

"Ah, this is my special ability, say 'emoji', this has to be written to be interesting, I want to say this, I'll draw it." After I finished speaking, I took out a pen and paper from my school bag and drew the symbol "(*^__^*)". Mom laughed when she saw the "poof".

"It's very interesting to draw, and there are such interesting things, young people nowadays...... Maybe I'm going to have to learn a little bit too. ”

"No need Mom, you should be your calm middle-aged woman. Oh! That's right, that's right! Qin Xin, she adores you very much! Say you're the ideal woman in her heart. ”

Mom chuckled and said, "I'm just an ideal ghost, and this 'ideal' is not a human 'ideal'......"

Today, I didn't want to clean and cook three meals a day as usual, so I sat and chatted with my mother until ten o'clock.

"Mom is also going to 'work overtime', you can do what you want to do."

"Okay." I went to catch up on my homework and draw comics.

Mom said hello to me before leaving, look at her, she was originally an indifferent female elite in society, but now she has only put on a little makeup and changed her clothes, and now she is not a female employee who returns home from overtime, look at her posture with her head bowed and her chest, and her yellow face, she is not a person at all.

Such a mom goes out to work extra "night shifts" with her friends. I finished drawing the comic at twelve o'clock, and Jia Bird gave me one of his QQ trumpets, and I contacted him and said that I would bring it to him tomorrow. By the way, I want to bring "ingredients" to the birds, of course, for free, so that I can go to them for lunch at noon without eating those people's things.

"Really? I went, my family has always been short of 'food', we don't go 'overtime', all rely on the money to draw comics is not enough to get by! ”

"Night shift" is the code word for our team to prey on humans at night, and ghosts like the beetle who dare not or are unwilling to kill only rely on their legitimate profession to buy human flesh from the "butcher" to eat. My family's conditions are very good, but I can't eat if I don't go to the "night shift", but my mother likes to "work overtime". With her knowledge of dissection and the technical equipment for preserving internal organs, she was able to maximize the value of a corpse, cutting out useful internal organs and selling them in bulk on the black market at home and abroad, and using the remaining meat for ghosts to eat. At the beginning, my mother made her first pot of gold by selling her organs, but now she has made it, but she can't quit killing and dissecting, which is a great joy in her ghost life!

"Can you come now?"

"(⊙o⊙)?

"Please, I can only eat one meal of meat at home!"

I thought about it for a moment and said, "Okay, I'll go." ”

"Aliado (Japanese empty ear, meaning thanksgiving)!"

I texted my mom and said I was leaving to deliver meat to a friend, so that if she came back early and saw me wasn't there, she would know what I was doing and wouldn't have to worry about me.

It's so late, the bus and subway have passed the last train early, and I can only take a taxi, what a lot of money this must be, there are a few red tickets under my mother's pillow, I took a few, put the frozen human meat in the refrigerator into a bag, and went out with the bag.

I walked downstairs to the building where the bird lived, and it was already past one o'clock, and there was still a light in the window of the bird. I climbed to the sixth floor where I lived, and I knocked on the door with a "knock knock" sound.

"It's coming!" The bird opened the door, "You're here!" Come on in! ”

I entered the door, put a bag full of human flesh in the kitchen, and casually said, "Where's Cynthia?" ”

"She went to bed early, she's a good boy, go to bed at nine o'clock!" The bird shrugged, "What do you say you want to sleep in, but it's actually a child's paper!" By the way, be quiet, don't wake her up. ”

"Haha!" I laughed dryly, "It hurts Cynthia so much?" ”

"You don't know anything, I can't stand Miss Xin's anger when she gets up!" The dull hair is shaking

A bird, now joined the FFF group for a luxurious lunch! Speaking of which, the duck is a dish.

"Thank you Huo Xie, don't you stay for a supper?"

"Okay, if you don't mind, I'll make supper."

"Really? Actually, I'm not very good at cooking, it's just hard for you! ”

"It's okay, I've been going to school for the past two days, and I haven't had a good meal!" I thought about it again, and then said, "Actually, it's not that I didn't eat well, or I didn't let me make food, I really ......."

Sao New Year's Accumulation......

"I'm sick (〃> dish <=!"

Huo Xie used "uncomfortable"!

The results are outstanding......

Chai Zi Yu can't move!

"Haha, I'm not kidding you. By the way, this is the draft, although it can be given to you tomorrow, but anyway, I want to come, so I brought it by the way. ”

"Good! , I took it to see! ”

"Well, I'm going to make a supper."

"By the way, where's the apron?"

"Behind the bathroom door."

I fastened my apron and walked to the stove, grasping the knob with my left hand and waving it with my right hand!

"Fire Cloud Palm!"

With a "whew", the fire was blazing!

Very well, this oil fume; The sound of "呲呲" under the pot of this dish; This overflowing aroma! That's life!

"It's time to eat!" I said as I untied my apron and hung it behind the bathroom door.

A bird is painting at the desk.

I froze, he didn't seem to notice me yet.

"Sama, it's time for supper!"

"Oh, okay......" The beetle slowly stood up and looked at me for a few minutes.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing...... I'm sorry, the drawing is not good, and I want you to revise it...... "Huo Xie, I'm so disappointed."

Jia Bird smiled: "It's not that you don't draw well, it's just that I think this posture needs to be changed, you see." ”

Indeed, just changing my posture and retouching the slash a few times by the way, the momentum of the protagonist standing up was presented in front of me like an explosion!

"It's so much better!" The bird nodded with satisfaction, "By the way, it looks like it's going to be eaten......"

Slow half-beat guy......

"I'll ...... Let's chirp, chirp...... I'm going to swallow my tongue! ”

"Slow down, slow down!"

After the wind and clouds passed, the Jia Bird let out a satisfied murmur of "Mmmmmmmm ”

"One of my older sisters I knew, I was taught ...... My part-time job at 'Underground' was to help stir-fry food during the six- or seven-o'clock dinner rush hour. ”

"Now you're in for a treat! I'm going to call Cynthia up? No, no, no! That guy is angry when he gets up...... Anyway, there's so much left, I'll give her another hot one tomorrow morning. ”

"You're my little ......"

"Hey, hey?"

"Why haven't you come back yet? I'm all home! "Mom's anger is still burning my hair, even if it is filtered through my phone and radio!

"Good, good! I'll be right back! ”

"Right now! Fly back to the old lady! ”

"Doodoo ......"

I put down my phone and let out a long breath and said to Sama, "I'll go back first, the meat is in the refrigerator, and contact me if you need it." ”

"Okay!"

"Although I appreciate the seriousness and meticulousness of Katori Sama, it will be sad if you fall down on us fans!"

"Let's go! I know that resting, sluts are hypocritical! ”

"Okay, slut, I'm gone! Have a good dream. ”