Mei Ying doesn't like to study, but she is keen to read. Reading novels and flipping through magazines is her greatest hobby. She likes to write a diary, happy and depressed, she uses her pen to express her feelings. Occasionally, she would write a few small love poems, lying on the bed and secretly reciting them, but the empty content, disorganized, and some obscene words and sentences that appeared from nowhere made her feel ridiculous. She really wanted to express her emotions well, but she couldn't seem to find any convincing memories and feelings left in her heart.

Make yourself a cup of tea, light a cigarette, open your journal, and meditate with your chin in your hand. Since getting acquainted with Lin Yumo, every time she holds a cigarette, she always thinks of him, the enduring fireworks of Baoguo Temple did not burn into her heart, but the cigarette that Lin Yumo handed her eroded her internal organs.

Smoking and drinking tea are her most inseparable hobbies, to be precise, habits. She likes to smoke harder, but she likes to soak the cigarette butt and blow it before smoking, nonsensical habits, smoking may be just to smell the smoke, so that the room is full of smoke, as if to create a certain atmosphere. Mount Emei is rich in a kind of tea, called bamboo leaf green. This name is still given by Marshal Chen Yi, this tea is flat and smooth, the whole body is emerald green, tight and symmetrical, the body is like a bamboo leaf, very exquisite. The tea soup is yellow and green, the entrance is clear, the taste is mellow and sweet, and it is also very durable and resistant to brewing. Mei Ying especially likes the posture of this tea after entering the water, as if a group of green-clothed fairies are dancing in the water, pavilions and green covers, Yingying Sujing, only to see the affectionate hand alone, the sleeves are jagged, the clear waves are spreading, and the white mist is rising. Very beautiful, very beautiful! Tea may not be for tea, just for the beauty of tea, just for a leisurely mood.

June 3rd

"It's very annoying today, there are people everywhere, it's hot, but at the moment it's like blowing up a pot, boiling water is pouring in from all sides, fortunately, the panda pavilion is on higher ground, and the heat wave has been subtracted. Listening to those occasional generous speeches, looking at the expressions full of righteous indignation, it was like a clown, and a bit like a demagogic wizard, one after another, I really didn't know where to die. I'm too lazy to pay attention to it.,I've never been interested in participating in any activities.,Yesterday the squad leader asked me to write the regiment application.,What to do when you join the group.,I'm not an official.,Leave with a year left after the leisurely mix.,There's nothing to be nostalgic about here.,Find a good job earlier.,Reduce the burden on your parents.,And then dress yourself up more beautifully is the right thing.。

Since the induction of labor, ** has been swollen uncomfortably, and from time to time milk will ooze, so that I dare not go out for a long time, a person ran to the toilet to squeeze, and worried that they smelled, I smoked hard, it seems to be quite effective, except for the smell of smoke in this room, they can't smell anything else. Fortunately, I am the only dog in this room, and I can't even notice them.

I don't know how long it will take for this swelling pain to go away, but my boobs are much smaller, the bras my mother used to buy were too big, and it would be nice if my body was also thinner, I don't dare to face the face in the mirror now, I find myself too ugly, except for the eyebrows that don't need to be painted, other places really make me worry. I really want to make myself a melon seed face, I heard the boys say that the melon seed face is the best-looking and the most temperamental, what should I do? I really wanted to cut off the excess meat on my face piece by piece, but I was afraid of pain, and I didn't have the perseverance to lose weight, but I was more and more able to eat. It seems that the dream of becoming a swan is destined to be shattered, and he can only struggle in the mud for the rest of his life.

Last night, I dreamed of Lin Yumo, I don't know if he got his wish and had a lovely daughter, I can't forget his voice, because of this voice, I am also fascinated by his people. Oops, no, I'm going crazy, how can I be so obsessed with a man who is a round older than me? If my parents found out, they would have wondered if I had fallen into an evil spirit, and even Sister Dan said that my brain was not clear after the operation. But I really can't forget him, alas! I'm so ugly, he won't like me, my fair lady, a gentleman is good, a fat girl like me, I'm afraid people won't be able to remember it for a long time.

It's so distressed, what else are you doing swans, it's clearly a toad looking at a swan, no matter how big the mouth is, it can't eat, it's really about to be killed by yourself, so soon the scar forgets the pain. Love and men are too far away for me, and it would be nice if a man didn't dislike me in the future, but I won't have any more children. That night was so horrible that the dead child often appeared in my dreams, and I was so sick to death at the thought of him. If I get married in the future and people insist that I have children, I will divorce, and it will be enough for me to suffer once, and I can't be sinned again.

It's really annoying, I still want Lin Yumo, his light smile almost overshadows all the spring light, I really don't know if I will see him in the future, and if there will be a man like him in this world. When I saw Qi Yuanhui at noon, I suddenly didn't want to pay attention to him anymore, watching him hook up with another girl, I didn't feel anything in my heart, and I sneered at a man like him. Inattentive to love, the flashy appearance is full of dirt, it will only tarnish the purity of girls, don't like this kind of person in the future, eat a trench, grow a wisdom, don't like a man easily from now on, let a man like me. Of course, except for Lin Yumo, after all, he is just an image in my life, and as the years fade away, I may not think of him again after many years. ”

"Shadow, shadow, open the door." A hurried knock on the door disrupted Mei Ying's thoughts, it was Sister Dan's voice.

"What's wrong, this is? Don't you have to go to school, look at this frame is going to strike. "This is the ending that Mei Ying likes very much, it's best to even skip the exam and go home with a graduation certificate.

"I don't know very well, anyway, the class can't be completed, many people are going to Chengdu People's Square to ban sitting, don't you just go home too? I haven't figured it out yet, Bin Bin is going to write his graduation thesis, and I have to accompany him. ”

"These people are sick, and they are still college students, what kind of consciousness do they have? What kind of ban on sitting and demonstrating, the Beiyang government has collapsed, and what is the May Fourth Movement, I don't go, I support the party, our family supports the party, don't look at my dad is just a worker, but his consciousness is quite high, and he is still a party member. Don't go, let's just stay in the school, aren't we just going to climb the Golden Peak? Mei Ying didn't understand how her father became a party member, but because of her status as a party member, her father was promoted to the section chief of the logistics department of the factory before she went to college, and said that the factory was going to carry out some innovation and reform. The family was happy at that dinner, my mother cooked a lot of dishes, and my father said that he would not beat her again in the future, and poured her a glass of wine to celebrate her imminent entrance to school, I had never seen my father so happy, so grand as if she was going to Harvard or Oxford.

People are so strange, it should be a combination of all kinds of contradictions. Mei Ying is not motivated, and she is not interested in politics, but she is quite satisfied with the current social form and living conditions, she doesn't want anything to change, just like the love she has always longed for in her heart, although she has never gotten it, she is still full of confidence, after all, love is still very beautiful in her heart.

"Well, that's a good idea, so let's send a letter to the family, so as not to worry my parents."

Sister Dan is still thoughtful, and it is still necessary to explain it to her parents.

Mei Ying didn't know what happened later, there was no TV to watch in the dormitory, and several other roommates went home, she and Sister Dan had a party in the dormitory every night, and there was a vegetable market in the school, and many farmers came here to sell vegetables every day, so the two of them used the electric stove to make hot pot to eat, and from time to time they also used books and scrolls as a microphone to sing a few songs.

Mei Ying liked Qi Qin's "About Winter" very much, but the lyrics lost the joyful atmosphere, so she sang Fei Xiang's "A Fire in Winter" while twisting, Sister Dan said that her ass was an electric fan, she said that listening to Sister Dan singing Leslie Cheung's song seemed to be listening to Tang Seng chanting the mantra, and that night really made both of them burst into laughter. They sang and laughed, and apart from the laughter and laughter of the room, what was the outside world to do with them. Fortunately, the people in the girls' building are almost gone, and only a few of their haunting ghosts are still holding their positions, otherwise, the two of them will become the target of public criticism again.