My father was a straight-tempered man, and he complained a lot of the time in front of his mother. So, my sister naturally became aware of this emerging problem. As a last resort, my sister and I had to persuade my mother from time to time. Remind her to run into the fields as little as possible and to spend more time and energy taking care of her father.

However, it was okay that we did not persuade, and when we did, it was like lighting a powder keg, and my mother completely exploded. "You all say I only care about the work in the fields, but I hardly go to the fields these days. Even if you go, you will settle your dad first. As soon as you said that you wanted to improve nutrition and food, I immediately bought fish, bought bones, and stewed soup to make it. This meal is noodle, the next meal is porridge, and the next meal is soup...... I'm going to do it in a different way! But your father is good, and he has never given me a good face. Even in front of you, I said that I was useless. I'm miserable and tired. But you have to keep quiet, right? If it weren't for your father's poor health, I would ......."

The mother's words were full of grievances and unwillingness. In fact, since my father was discharged from the hospital, my mother has basically taken care of my father at home. As my mother herself said, she has been hard and tired enough these days. Here we can paraphrase the saying: "There is no merit, there is hard work"! But the father, who speaks mercilessly, will be angrily accused by his mother for not knowing how to adapt the recipe. felt that the mother who was always said by her father to be "useless", and over time, a lot of resentment gathered in her heart. Our persuasion from the father's position happened to be the fuse for the mother to vent her dissatisfaction.

We sensed the smell of gunpowder in my mother's words, and my sister and I were afraid that our mother would be so secretive that we would quarrel with my father. So when I heard this, I had to persuade again: "Mom, in fact, Dad has told us more than once that you have worked hard for him these days!" ”

When my mother heard this, her face looked much better.

"You also know Dad's temper, he basically speaks with a cold face, but that doesn't mean that he necessarily blames you. From Dad's words, we can all hear that he wants you to be a little flexible when cooking for him. Perhaps, you feel that you have been very flexible. First rice porridge, then noodles, then soup. Everything is different, so don't you know how to be flexible? ”

"It's just, I'm already thinking of ways to change it. However, your dad doesn't appreciate it at all! The mother immediately felt a psychological empathy, and said with some indignation. We know that this is the mother venting her dissatisfaction.

"But, Mom, you use fish soup to cook porridge, and you use fish soup below, and the soup for your father is still fish soup. Isn't this eating and drinking still a kind of fish soup flavor in the end? If you change like this, and it will only take two or three days to change, then who can stand it? ”

"I don't always use fish broth, and sometimes I switch to bone broth. I usually use fish broth and bone broth interchangeably. The mother realized that something was wrong, and it seemed that the pair of children in front of her were not really on her side.

After listening to my mother's quibble, we replied unhurriedly, "Mom, we know that you use it alternately. But, you alternate between two or three days. Based on the fact that my father eats seven meals a day, two days is fourteen meals. If you think about it, fourteen meals a day are all the same taste, who can stand this? ”

"Who can stand it? I can stand it. When we were young, we drank very thin porridge every day, and we grew up for months. Haven't you passed it too? What's more, I made fish soup and bone broth for your dad. I don't know how many times these are more fragrant than gruel, what's unbearable? The mother retorted rather dissatisfiedly.

"Mom...... Times are different. How can it be compared to the past? What we mean by this is that you should pay attention to the changes in taste and variety when you mix them. This time the eight-treasure porridge, the next time the bone soup noodles, then the fish soup, and then the vegetable porridge...... Dad hasn't fully recovered yet, and it's inevitable that he has a bad appetite, and only by changing his method in this way can he continue to arouse Dad's appetite. ”

"You're talking lightly. Your dad only eats a little at a time, and if every meal is completely different, then I may not be able to cook for your dad all day long. Don't forget, your dad has to eat seven or eight meals a day? Don't 'stand and talk without back pain', you have the ability to come! "Mother angrily turned us back.

Mother's trick is quite clever. Immediately, my sister and I were speechless. Because, in fact, we really can't stay in our hometown all the time, so it is impossible to cook food for my father every day. Of course, the main reason is that I feel sorry for my mother. Regardless of whether it is done satisfactorily or not, after all, it is my mother who is working alone at home these days. We have all seen the hard work of my mother these days. How can we bear to blame our mother for some mistakes? Actually, we didn't mean to blame before. After hearing that my mother had already remembered to say, "You have the ability, you can come", my sister and I both realized that it was no longer appropriate to say anything more to our mother at this time.

In the process of communicating with the mother because of the father's meal, the mother's emotional transformation from grievance to anger is actually an extremely deep factor. On the surface, my mother's change in mood was due to us helping my father tell me how bad the food she cooked. But when I think about it, I feel that this understanding is inevitably a little superficial. As a great mother, I don't think she would be angry with her children for saying a few things about the flaws in their cooking. The real reason for my mother's anger was that she didn't feel our concern. We are not relieved by our mother's hard work these days, but "blamed" for the slight flaws in the fruits of our hard work. Compared with the extreme care for my father, it is no wonder that my mother is angry because of this!

Since my father's surgery, our family's attention has been almost entirely focused on him. Even so, we regret that we didn't pay enough attention to our father at the time. But after this exchange with my mother, my sister and I are keenly aware that these days, our attention to our mother has been lacking to the point of almost ignorance. At that time, my sister and I inevitably felt an apology in our hearts. It is understandable that the father in special circumstances should be the center of gravity of our family, but it is very undesirable to neglect the mother who also nurtures him.

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