Sending Yun Zheng away, I thought about it and decided to go to An Yuanxi, I want to know what he thinks. I know how hard this news hit him, if he really can't accept ......, I bite my lip, it's not a big deal, I just like him a little bit, I'm just a little bit like him, I'm just a child without him? Walking straight into his office, An Yuanxi saw me coming in, got up from the chair, and said uncomfortably: "I'll go and see the embroidery field." ”

"Stop!" I whispered, An Yuanxi paused, and I walked up to him, "Are you going to avoid me all the time?" He froze, his eyelashes down. I bit my lip: "Is my past so hard for you to accept?" ”

"I ......," he looked down at the ground and muttered, "I just thought it was too surprised...... "He didn't speak harshly to me, which made me feel uneasy, this nerd will certainly not be able to accept this fact for a while, his experience is too simple, his morals are too rotten, my disgraceful past is bound to become a stain on his feelings, it will be very painful for him, if he needs time to clear his mind, I am willing to give it to him, because I cherish and respect his feelings. When I came to this world, all the men I knew were calculating and calculating. Chu Yan said that he loved me, but his love was only selfish; Yu Gongzi seems to care about me, but I am just a fresh toy in his eyes; Feng Ge said that if no one loves me, he will love me, but no matter how deep I have a relationship with him, I can't touch his heart; Stygian Flame kept calling me wife, but he was more like a child on a whim, and I didn't even understand why he liked me inexplicably; Ouray gave me the golden sword, but he was showing off his own excellent ....... There is no one like An Yuanxi who silently guards my side, his liking for me is pure liking, giving his care bit by bit, no utilitarianism, no calculation, all I want is such a simple feeling, I am not a wooden person, An Yuanxi is so indifferent to me?

"I didn't want to hide it from you, I thought about it and wanted to find a chance to tell you......" I muttered, but the experience of Qinglou was so unbearable, I still couldn't say it. An Yuanxi, you only know that despising the women of Qinglou has corrupted the social atmosphere, and how do you know the blood and tears behind their laughter by leaning on the door. If I had said it in earnest, you might have suffered even more.

An Yuanxi was silent for a long time, and said softly: "I don't blame you......"

"Really?" I took his hand in surprise and delight, and he seemed to be burned by a flint, and his hand shrank violently, and my hand stopped in the air in embarrassment. I looked at my hand in a daze, raised my eyes, and looked at his handsome face, which he looked away, a little pale. There was a sudden pain in his heart, he didn't blame me, but he still cared, this must become a thorn in his heart, even if he reluctantly accepted me today, this thorn will still be in his heart, maybe it will puncture his heart and lungs at any time.

My body is a little cold. It's nothing, I just like him a little bit. I took two steps back, An Yuanxi raised his eyes to look at me, seeing the pain in my eyes, An Yuanxi was startled, wanted to reach out and touch my shoulder, and suddenly retracted his hand, frowning: "Ye'er......, you don't have to worry, I will let my mother come to propose......"

So you thought I was worried about this? I shook my head and laughed miserably! Is it because I had an intimate relationship with you last night, are you responsible? Fool, I'm not a virgin, and it's not your turn to be responsible! My poor nerd, you're so uncomfortable yourself, you really don't have to be so reluctant to take care of my mood! Moreover, I don't like you very much, there is injury, it is not that you force yourself to make unnatural comforts to me, but that you nervously withdraw your hand. Don't lie to me, idiot, you're not as smart as I am, and if you move your arms, I'll know what you're going to do.

"Don't have to propose, fool." Why does my heart hurt so much? I don't really like him that much! But it was as if someone was grabbing and twisting their hearts into a ball. I said blankly, "You know that I used to be a woman in the Qinglou, and that kind of thing last night was nothing to me at all. ”

An Yuanxi's face suddenly turned pale, heh, I'm sorry, nerd, I can't compensate for your innocence, you just should, be bitten by a dog. I can't stay here anymore, if I stay any longer, I'm going to suffocate in pain, I turned around, opened the door and ran out, An Yuanxi called me nervously behind me, "Ye'er......"

Don't call me! Call me again and I'll rely on you! Tears welled up, I ran out of the back hall, ran into the backyard, let me stay alone for a while, I bumped into a black shadow head-on, I didn't react, I only heard An Yuanxi's scream: "Ye'er ......" The body was suddenly pushed out by a force, I fell into the yard, my elbow rubbed the ground, and suddenly there was a sharp pain, I struggled to lift my body, looked back, and the scene in front of me made my eyes crack: "An Yuanxi!" ”

He collapsed with his eyes closed, and a scattered container was pressed on his body, I quickly rushed over, pushed away the wooden box on his body, and helped his head: "An Yuanxi, how are you?" The hand touched the back of his head, it was warm and wet, I pulled out my hand and saw that my hand was red with blood, and I was so shocked that my soul flew away: "An Yuanxi, you open my eyes for me, you wake me up......"

The guy from Xiuzhuang stood next to him in a panic: "Miss Ye, I, I didn't have a heart, I came out with the goods, you suddenly bumped over, Mr. An pounced on you and pushed you away, I didn't hold it steady, and the cargo box fell on him......"

"Shut up!" I burst into tears and shouted like crazy, "Go to the doctor, go find the doctor!" ”

He hurriedly ran out, I hugged An Yuanxi tightly, and tears fell on his bloodless face: "An Yuanxi, don't scare me, wake up, don't torture me, please wake up......"

Sister Xiu and the guys in the store ran into the backyard, and when they saw this, they were shocked and said, "Miss Ye, let's carry Mr. An into the house first......

"Why can't he stop bleeding? Why does the blood keep flowing? I looked at the blood on my hands in a panic, and quickly covered the back of An Yuanxi's head, "Will he die?" Will it die? ”

"Miss Ye, don't scare yourself, the doctor is coming soon, carry Manager An into the house first!" Sister Xiu squatted down and calmly grabbed my shoulder, "You can't mess around at this time!" ”

The guy carried An Yuanxi into the soft couch in my office, I stared at the blood stains dripping all the way, my chaotic mind cleared up a little, and turned to Sister Xiu and said, "Go find some cotton cloth, cover his wounds first, and then go to see the doctor?" ”

Layer after layer of cotton cloth was tightly covered on An Yuanxi's wound, and my tears poured out again: "An Yuanxi, I won't let you die, I won't allow you to die, you wake me up." You idiot, why do you want to chase me out after me saying such hurtful things? You wake me up......"

"Miss Ye, the doctor is here!" Sister Xiu led an old man in. I hurriedly stood up and rushed over, and said incoherently: "Doctor, he hurt his head, he stopped bleeding, and his body was crushed by the cargo box, you check to see if there are any bones......"

"Girl, don't panic, I'll take care of it." The doctor examined An Yuanxi's wound, first helped him stop the bleeding, applied medicine and bandaged, and then helped him diagnose his pulse. I saw the doctor frowning and said nervously, "Doctor, how is he?" ”

"The patient's pulse is sometimes strong and sometimes weak, his breathing and heartbeat are very disordered, his trauma is not serious, but the blood flow is very large, indicating that his consciousness in the brain is very confused, so that the blood flow is urgent, so that the blood does not stop." The doctor said.

I said anxiously, "What will happen then?" Didn't his bleeding stop? When will he wake up? ”

"The situation is not optimistic. Although the blood from his trauma was stopped with medicine, if the blood continued to fluctuate like this, it would be easy to bleed again......" The doctor sighed and said, "If he doesn't wake up, whether he can survive depends on his luck and creation?" ”

I was struck by lightning and froze. The doctor said: "I will prescribe some medicine for him, you send someone to go back with me to catch him, decoction according to the prescription for him, I will come over to check the wound every day, and the patient can't move now, everything will be said when he wakes up." If you can wake up, it's fine. ”

Sister Xiu sent the doctor away, walked into the office, saw me still standing in a daze, and said worriedly: "Miss Ye, what should I do now?" ”

I came back to my senses, suddenly felt weak all over, leaned on the table and sat on the chair, I said softly: "Sister Xiu, the embroidery village is temporarily closed, I don't want anyone to make a noise to Mr. An to recuperate, you tell the workers, I will not deduct their wages during the shutdown." Also, please ask someone to go back and inform Xiaohong, ask her to prepare some clothes and bedding for me and send them over, and inform Aunt An again. ”

Sister Xiu covered the door and went out, I moved a stool and sat in front of the soft couch, held An Yuanxi's pale hand, looked at his lifeless face, and said softly: "An Yuanxi, are you okay when you wake up?" Your mind is so confused, what are you thinking? Are you mad at me? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said those nonsense to you off, can you wake up and scold me? As long as you wake up, no matter how you scold me, I won't be angry, okay......"

I looked at his bloodless face and said for a long time, hoping for a miracle, but An Yuanxi seemed to be frozen and didn't react at all. The guy who grabbed the medicine came back, and I arranged to go to the yard to decoct the medicine. Sister Xiu soon brought Aunt An, An Sheng and Xiaohong, Aunt An entered the door and saw An Yuanxi's appearance, her face twitched, and she walked to the soft couch with tears in her eyes, I quickly stood up and helped her sit on the stool, her lips trembled, tears flowed down, and murmured: "What kind of evil have I created......"

I bit my lip: "I'm sorry, Aunt An, it's me who is not good......" She clenched An Yuanxi's hand, looked at him blankly, and didn't say a word. Xiaohong moved the futon in, I quickly took a bed cover on An Yuanxi, looked down and saw that Aunt An had been crying silently, my heart was sour, and said to An Sheng: "You look at the aunt and the son, I'll go to the yard to see the decoction." ”

"Girl, I'll go, you stay here." Xiaohong hurriedly said and pulled Sister Xiu out. I walked to the couch and sat beside Aunt An, looking at An Yuanxi in a daze. Suddenly, An Yuanxi's body shook and his head shook slightly. My eyes widened, and Aunt An called him softly: "Far away? Far away? ”

He frowned in his coma, his expression was extremely painful, and I reached out and touched his forehead, feeling the burning heat like fire: "He has a fever!" Ansheng, add another quilt to him! I stood up, put a basin of water, and wrung a towel to cold his forehead, but he still kept shivering, and his mouth was talking nonsense intermittently: "Mother......, why are you ......, why do you ...... me like this, why do you ......"

I was stunned and saw tears rolling out of the corners of Aunt An's eyes. An Yuanxi's dreams were intermittent: "Don't kill my ......, don't kill me......" Aunt An sobbed: "Yuanxi, what kind of evil are you?" An Yuanxi's eyebrows became tighter and tighter, and a thin cold sweat secreted from his face, I took off the towel on his forehead, rewrung the cold water and applied it, and gently stroked his frowning eyebrows, his brows gradually loosened, and muttered: "I'm sorry......, I shouldn't have ...... you like this."

My heart is sour, fool, do you still think about that in your dreams? I don't blame you, I really don't blame you! An Yuanxi frowned, and suddenly twitched all over: "Don't ......, don't hit my ......, I'm obedient, I'll listen to you......" His body kept trembling, and the soft couch squeaked, and I was so frightened that I grabbed his arm: "An Yuanxi, what's wrong with you?" What are you dreaming about? Don't scare me......"

Aunt An cried bitterly: "He was beaten on the head last time, and he also shouted and shouted to kill, he kept talking nonsense, and he had a fever for several days and nights, far away, if you are like this again, how can you let your mother live......"

Xiaohong came in with the medicine: "Girl, the medicine is ready." I hurriedly brought it over, and Aunt An took the medicine from my hand: "I'll feed him." She scooped a spoonful of medicine, blew it cold and sent it to An Yuanxi's lips, but as soon as the medicine was poured into her mouth, it immediately flowed out of the corner of her mouth, Aunt An tried two or three times, he still couldn't swallow the medicine, he was anxious and angry, and couldn't help crying again, I quickly took the medicine bowl over: "Auntie, let me try it." ”

She nodded, handed the medicine bowl to me, and got up for me. I scooped a spoonful and fed it to him, just like before, and after thinking about it, I brought the medicine bowl to my lips and took a sip. Xiaohong said in surprise: "Girl, aren't you the most afraid of taking medicine...... I ignored her, the bitter medicinal juice made me almost vomit, and I couldn't hold back the discomfort in my heart, I bent down and pressed my lips against An Yuanxi's lips.

His lips were so cold, I heard the gasping sound in the room, but I didn't have time to pay attention to it, I fed the medicine into An Yuanxi's mouth, he resisted and wanted to spit it out, I sealed his lips tightly, until I felt that the medicine had slipped into his throat, before I let go, seeing that the medicine did not overflow from the corners of his mouth, I was happy in my heart, and quickly took another sip and fed him in the same way.

After feeding a bowl of medicine, I raised my eyes and saw a room full of people looking at me in a daze, and my face turned red: "I ......"

Aunt An took my hand, her eyes were full of pity: "Miss Ye, you are so far away from us, I don't know how to thank you......"

I hurriedly shook my head: "Auntie, Yuanxi was injured because of me, don't say that." ”

"It's really hard for you......" Aunt An sighed faintly. I put down the bowl and said softly: "Auntie, don't worry, I will take good care of Yuanxi, I will ask Xiaohong to sort out the VIP room, you go back to rest first." ”

She nodded, Xiaohong and An Sheng helped her out, and I gently closed the door and sat back on the couch. After taking a bowl of medicine, he was much quieter, his body no longer twitched, and he stopped dreaming. His brow was still furrowed, and his long eyelashes covered the closed eyelids, casting a faint shadow. I wiped the sweat from his face, and my hand stroked the bridge of his handsome nose, pale cheeks, and a slight distraction. An Yuanxi, my nerd, what should I do with you? I don't want to lie to myself, I don't just like you a little bit, I don't want to let go of you, as long as you are willing to accept me, the things you care about in your heart, give me time for me to slowly help you smooth it out, okay?

The day before I was thinking, if you can't accept my past, are you worth liking? Worth? Voila, it's worth it? It turns out that my feelings are also valuable! I ask others to love me selflessly, and I myself have already put my feelings on the price, waiting for others to exchange them for an equal price. While I criticize others for calculating and calculating, but myself, why am I not calculating? An Yuanxi, I understand, if you want to be happy, you also have to pay, I can't, I only ask you to be alone. Please wake up, I'll love you well, okay?

I took his hand and sat down until dawn. Xiaohong sent medicine again in the night, and I still fed it to him. In the middle of the night, his fever gradually subsided, but he still didn't wake up, but he didn't make a fuss as Aunt An said before. Early in the morning, Aunt pushed the door in, saw me sitting in a daze, and said softly: "Miss Ye, I'll guard him, you go and rest for a while." ”

I shook my head: "I can't sleep. Aunt An said softly: "But you haven't slept all night, aren't you tired?" I don't know when Yuanxi will wake up, so don't tire yourself out first. Good boy, go sleep for a while. ”

I stood up when I heard this, and I couldn't let the people who cared about me worry too much. I went to the yard first to see if An Yuanxi's medicine was decoctioned, and when I stepped out of the door, I saw that it was raining outside, and the cold wind was blowing on my body, I shivered, and I felt chills all over my body. Little Red moved the medicine stove down the hallway and was pouring out the medicine. I walked over and took the medicine: "Thank you for your hard work, go and rest for a while." ”

"The girl is working harder than me." Xiaohong looked up at me, "Look, my eyes are red." I smiled, brought the medicine into the office, and heard Aunt An's surprised and happy voice: "Yuanxi, are you awake?" "Oh my God! I was shocked, and hurriedly ran over, met An Yuanxi's eyes, and looked at him in a daze, with great joy in my heart.

An Yuanxi's gaze crossed over to Aunt An and looked at me steadily. A trace of pain flashed in his eyes, mixed with complex emotions that I couldn't understand, I was stunned, his eyes were different from usual, with some alienation and sentimentality, which made me feel familiar and strange. Aunt An turned her head to look at me, smiled and walked out: "You guys talk." ”

I came back to my senses and sat down on the couch with a red face: "I've drunk the medicine." ”

He propped himself up, and I took a pillow and put it behind him, picked up the medicine bowl, scooped a spoonful of the medicine and handed it to his lips. "I'll do it myself." He turned his face away, took the bowl in my hand, drank the medicine in one gulp, and put the bowl on the side of the couch. I removed the bowl and took his hand, his hand shrunk, I squeezed it tightly to prevent him from flinching, his hand stiffened in my hand, I looked up at him, bit my lip and said, "I'm so afraid you won't wake up." ”

He looked at me silently, not saying a word. I looked at his strange eyes and panicked: "What's wrong?" Are you still dizzy? Otherwise, you can lie down and sleep for a while......" I kept talking, but he didn't say anything, just kept looking at me, I was stared at by him a little weak, my face gradually burned, and finally muttered: "I said that yesterday, I was angry with you, I, I didn't take that kind of thing very casually, I ......"

"Miss Ye!" He finally spoke, but I was stunned, Miss Ye? He withdrew his hand from my hand and looked at me fixedly, his face sank: "It's impossible for me to follow you!" ”

I blinked: "What? "I don't understand.

"I won't be with you, it's impossible for me to be with you!" He turned his face and said coldly.

"Why?" Why did he wake up, it would be like this? I looked at him blankly and said in a daze, "You can't accept my past? His body trembled slightly, and his voice was slightly hoarse: "Yes!" ”

"You're lying, you didn't say that yesterday!" My tears welled up, "Why are you telling lies......"

"I'm not lying, I can't accept you." An Yuanxi lowered his eyelashes and said in a deep voice, "And I found that I don't like you very much." ”

"You talk nonsense, you look at me, you look me in the eye." I held his face and forced him to look at me, "You look me in the eye and say again, you don't like me?" ”

He lifted his eyelashes and looked into his eyes, and my body suddenly fell into the ice cave as usual. There was no emotion in it, only indifference, no pain, no struggle, nothing, just boundless indifference. My heart was like someone had cut a bloody wound, and I heard his emotionless voice say word by word: "I don't like you, I don't want you!" ”

My heart hurts, blood spreads out of my heart, I slowly let go of my hand, like I never knew this man, why? Why did my world change when he woke up? I used to think that the warmth this man gave me was everything I had. I stood up and stepped back step by step, only to feel a tearing pain, spreading from the bottom of my heart to my whole body, I stared at him tightly, and laughed miserably: "Okay, An Yuanxi, hello!" The body was against the wall, there was no way back, I came back to my senses, my dignity did not allow me to be so embarrassed, I took a breath, I looked at him quietly, and chuckled: "An Yuanxi, I hope you won't regret what you said today!" ”

Pull open the door and rush out, I can't face him anymore, I'll go crazy if I face him again. There seemed to be a call from Xiaohong and Aunt An in my ears, I turned a deaf ear, leave him, leave this man, how can he, how can he hurt me so far? The rain hit my face, and I couldn't tell if it was tears or rain, I just felt that my vision was blurry, and the sharp sting in my heart almost tore me apart. I don't know how far I ran, where I ran, when the blurred vision seemed to see Yun Zheng's stunned face, I felt a sweet throat, a mouthful of blood coughed out of my mouth, and my body suddenly went soft.

"Miss Ye ......"

His exclamation came from my ears, and I slipped softly in his arms: "Yun Zheng......, my heart hurts so much, I am about to die of pain...... darkness came to me, I smelled a faint ambergris, and then, lost all consciousness.

――2006、12、11

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